Larksong Grotto monster
you're the unbreakable heart
948 Posts
Ooc — Iris
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#23
To be accused of being unloved only because of who and how she was — that it was her own fault that her stepmother did not love her — hurt Laurel more than she would ever admit. It was the final twist in the dagger already planted in her heart. A dagger she had perhaps planted herself, in part. It was Laurel's worst nightmare come true; to hear the words that she had often screamed at her own reflection mirrored by her caretakers with such truth behind them. From Jhala she had expected it, but to hear her father agree with her seamlessly made her heart bleed.

She was released and sobbed from the pain of her injuries, for other than hurt she had brought to herself Laurel had never been wounded. Laurel crawled to the ground, unable to distinguish whether it was the physical or mental pain that hurt her the most. But the last thing she would ever do was admit to them how she felt about herself, that they were right, because she had always known that it wasn't their fault but her own, that she was simply unloveable because of who she was — but she could not stop herself from being herself, no matter how hard she tried, and she couldn't love a wolf who would take her father away from her, no matter how hard she tried.

When Reek spoke of his love and of Laurel not giving things a try it felt like lies, like the things he asked were impossible. Nobody's given her any tries; she was just supposed to accept everything the way it already was after falling into this situation. Nobody would adjust to her, so she had tried to make them adjust because she was told she was a princess here. But in the end that seemed another word that meant nothing, like all of them.

Every time she tried to form a thought into words the pain would kick in and it blinded everything else. Besides, she didn't know what to say. She wanted to say 'I hate you', she wanted to run away and hit her head against a tree and cry herself to sleep, because at least then she would be alone. It was better to be alone than hated, even if she would not escape her own scrutiny.

"It hurts so much," she sniffed, the only words she could find even though she wished to say so many more, and she took a small step away from Jhala, staying low to the ground, licking lips submissively out of instinct, with eyes trimmed on her stepmother in case she would make another move. She opened her mouth and said hoarsely, her words nearly a whisper, "I just wanted you to love me for who I am..." But it had become clear to her that something was terribly wrong with her to do these kind of things. That they didn't love her because they were terrible wolves, but because she was a monster.

She inched backwards, ready to bolt if they would move, and stared up at Reek and Jhala pleadingly, praying for someone to either take out the dagger or twist it to finally end her suffering.
Messages In This Thread
monster - by Laurel - November 25, 2016, 07:44 AM
RE: monster - by Tapat - November 25, 2016, 01:24 PM
RE: monster - by Reek - November 26, 2016, 11:12 AM
RE: monster - by Laurel - November 27, 2016, 05:25 AM
RE: monster - by Tapat - November 28, 2016, 06:12 AM
RE: monster - by Reek - December 06, 2016, 12:50 AM
RE: monster - by Laurel - December 06, 2016, 05:20 AM
RE: monster - by Tapat - December 06, 2016, 12:13 PM
RE: monster - by Jhala - December 06, 2016, 07:09 PM
RE: monster - by Reek - December 11, 2016, 11:30 AM
RE: monster - by Laurel - December 11, 2016, 01:46 PM
RE: monster - by Tapat - December 11, 2016, 03:07 PM
RE: monster - by Jhala - December 18, 2016, 10:20 AM
RE: monster - by Astik - December 18, 2016, 06:18 PM
RE: monster - by Reek - December 18, 2016, 11:42 PM
RE: monster - by Laurel - December 19, 2016, 02:40 AM
RE: monster - by Tapat - December 19, 2016, 05:09 AM
RE: monster - by Jhala - December 23, 2016, 04:10 PM
RE: monster - by Reek - December 24, 2016, 10:35 AM
RE: monster - by Laurel - December 25, 2016, 05:51 AM
RE: monster - by Jhala - December 25, 2016, 09:40 AM
RE: monster - by Reek - January 01, 2017, 11:35 PM
RE: monster - by Laurel - January 03, 2017, 05:08 AM
RE: monster - by Jhala - January 09, 2017, 11:23 PM
RE: monster - by Reek - January 13, 2017, 03:17 PM
RE: monster - by Laurel - January 14, 2017, 05:26 AM