Redhawk Caldera junebug

backdated to feb 17 <3

@Ponyboy was given a day to settle, to sleep, to rest. teya kept away all visitors from the den, even siblings, assuring them that it was just for now.
and when dusk streaked the frozen lake with bright orange and indigo, she sought her son, bringing a freshkilled trout and a smile of encouragement.
settling near, she kissed his cheek. "you want to talk about it?" she asked, trying to bring his gaze to her own.

He felt insecure in the interim, knowing that questions would come- though he might surprise his mother in having questions of his own. 

He nodded, eager to dispel the lingering tension. ”Mom I swear I was gonna tell you,” he said. ”We were just gonna take a trip to the sea, so she could see the island she grew up on- but then she came running at me like a day later, covered in blood, saying that we had to run- now- and she just didn’t say why.” 

He shook his head and his ears dropped in shame. ”I thought for a sec…That the thing that killed Dad came back, so we ran, but…She led us too far away, and we got lost and…She didn’t ever tell me what had happened”

His voice caught. ”It felt…Bad. So when I had a minute to myself, and I saw the Caldera I just…Left her, and ran back.” She had brought a fish with her, but he had no appetite. ”I’m sorry Mama, I really was gonna ask you before we left but it just…”[/b]

he explained and she softened. such earnestness could only be honesty. that was bronco in him, teya decided.
"i glad you home, honey," she chose to say first. "i not worry so much you went away as i worry you say nothing. when we are young, we want to travel. see things. go places."
a smile curved her mouth. "i glad you know brecheliant is still home even if you leave like that, ponyboy. always, always."
he was hardly a pup, but he was young. covered in blood; she mused this. "did ana say anything about where these islands are? and this — the thing that killed — did you see it?"

He felt his courage melt, and his chin jigged as a wave of emotion flooded him. If she had been angry with him, he would have done anything to remedy it- and while she did seem relieved he couldn’t help but feel ashamed for having caused her to worry. His mother had already lost so much, and suffered so much when Bronco had died…The last thing she needed was for her reckless son to be such a pill.

She seemed willing enough to forgive him for going, as it was apparently the way with young wolves. He discouraged the notion with a shake of his head. ”No Mama…I’d never leave without saying goodbye, willingly,” He felt guilt curl within his heart like an uncomfortable tumour. He had left willingly- he had panicked and simply run off without questioning Anathema’s motives. 

He simply hoped she would believe him, and know that if he disappeared without a farewell, that it was not because he was being frivolous and thoughtless. He cared too much for his mother to simply wander without seeking her approval first. 

He wanted to give her answers, to prove he was worthy of her trust. ”Out off the coast…It wasn’t too far, she’d said. I was going to ask you before we went, but then she came back, and she was bloody and she said we needed to run-“ He cut himself off. His mother already knew all of this. He still had no idea why it was that Anathema had been in such a state. 

When she asked about the striped cat, his ears flicked back. He hated to think about it. Whale eyed, he swallowed hard. ”The day…?” He asked, choking on the words. ”I didn’t see it the day it…” it hadn’t been the day his father had died, but it had been the day that had determined his fate. ”Or when Anathema came running. I didn’t see it, I just…I just saw the blood and I just…I got scared,” He admitted, voice shaking.

she listened. many parts of her son's story filled teya with dread, almost nauseatingly so. but she listened, stroking his ears from time to time despite the fact he was no longer a small child.
"you must have been terrified," teya sighed, slipping her arm around him. "this all right. you supposed to be frightened of monsters like this." she hoped he had not assumed blame, but sensed he might have, and it strengthened a budding resolve to —
she had always wanted to leave these graves behind, but love and hope and devotion kept her here.
"you know i not mad, right, pony?" teya murmured, pulling him closer and wishing for the millionth time that bronco was here to help guide their kids through the chaos of the last year.