Permafrost Hollows now i know what’s real what’s fake

@Zephyr
wc: 307

Phillip hadn’t been back on the beach since gathering coconuts with that woman. The very sight of the sand and salty ocean breeze caused anxiety to sprout in the pit of his stomach. When he walked along the shores, he thought of the Stowaways. He could hear their phantoms chattering, laughing, and mocking him. He could feel the sting of their teeth. Phillip knew they were far behind him, and would never venture out in search of the likes of him, but he still felt like he was being watched there. It’s foolish of him to think that way, but it sparked fear in him nonetheless. 

Exhausted by the ever growing dread, Phillip headed inland again. He hastily passed by places from distant memories, Neverwinter most notably. Guilt tugged at his chest everytime he glanced towards its general direction. He wished his will to flee from the woods wasn’t so deeply rooted in his heart. It could’ve been his home in another life, but not this one. There were too many demons there. 

The land past the mountains were unfamiliar to him. Winter’s come early here. It was unforgivably cold. Phillip was afraid to stop moving. He may freeze to death if he did. So, he weaved his way through the frosted taiga with little rest in hopes of finding an escape. He had no luck, and at one point he was forced to stop and find a place to rest.

Phillip slowly wandered through cavern after cavern, thinking there had to be a safe enough place to sleep somewhere. Each spot he found just didn’t seem to fit the bill. There’d always be a small crack or a distant shrill that scared him off.

It was well past midnight now, and Phillip was still on the search. Slow, half-lidded. He looked like a dead man walking.

Maman's care has brought him back to some semblance of health, though his mind remains fractured for now. He's quiet most of the time, and solitary when he can steal time away without feeling too much guilt. He loves his mother — but she isn't Kratos. No one is, and no one ever can be, in the same way no one can be Helios or Phillip. The loss has left him desolate, and his recent vision had only been salt in the wound.
Just like the cruelly familiar scent on the breeze. His thoughts halt, and so does he, only managing a couple more steps forward before his shock brings him entirely to a halt. Phillip? Again, his first instinct is disbelief, distrust in his own senses; it can't be him. But he's turning toward it anyway, following the trail as relentlessly as he's ever hunted any prey. He can't help the hope swelling within him like a great wave, the icy burning in his chest as he thinks of the possibility of reuniting with one of his lost loves.
Except —
He didn't really know he loved Phillip until just now. And that's a strange, twisted, awkward thought, because it can't be in the same way he loves his brother so it must be in the same way he loves his mate — that's too much right now, so he tucks it back where it came from the moment the dark figure comes into sight. Phillip! He doesn't even notice the state his friend is in as he barrels into him, refusing to stop for any reason until he feels the warmth of contact between them, dark fur mingling with his own silver.

There’s no escaping these ghostly noises is there? Just as he thought he found suitable place to rest, he heard something in echo in the distance. This sound wasn’t like the rest. It’s constant, rhythmic, and it came straight for him.

Phillip’s mind went wild as he made guesses about what it could possibly be. A monster? A Stowaway? He didn’t know which was worse. His heart raced as he began to flee again, and he wouldn’t have stopped if it weren’t for the call.

Phillip?

He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. That voice was so familiar. Zephyr? he thought aloud. But it can’t be. Zephyr was, well, he’s somewhere out there. Not here. After all the hardships hurled at him, he did not expect the universe to grant him the joy of reuniting with his friend.

But much to his shock, the universe wasn’t so cruel. Phillip turned around and saw him. It was no illusion, no trick. He was positive it was Zephyr running towards him and—hold on. He wasn’t gonna stop was he?

W-wait—! It’s already too late. The silver boy had already collided into him. The impact knocked more wind out of him than he would’ve liked (fatigue was to blame) but that didn’t bother him.

You’re.. here? Phillip poked through his scruff just to be certain he wasn’t just dreaming. Zephyr didn’t disappear, nor did he wake up. He could already feel tears forming in the corners of his eyes. He tried to stop crying with joyous laughter, but it didn’t help much.

I-I can’t believe it, he buried his face into his fur. I thought I’d never see you again.

The breath leaves the ice wraith's body on impact, too, though for different reasons; he can't hold back the sigh of relief when he confirms that Phillip is real. The dark boy's tears only add to the emotion threatening to overwhelm him. Where did you go? He blurts first, and then — It doesn't matter. You can tell me later. Just promise you won't leave me again. He burrows closer into Phillip's fur, sniffing him all over and leaving a trail of rough preening and gentle nips, checking him all over and simultaneously marking the boy as his own again.

He wasn’t ready to revisit the terrible memories he’d gathered during his time with the thieves, so he was relieved that the subject changed quickly.

I promise. He didn’t think twice before saying it. It’s a miracle their paths had crossed again. He wouldn’t take this second chance for granted.

Zephyr’s touch was soothing. It’s a forgotten feeling until now. Phillip had forgotten just how good it was. Phillip sighed and leaned into him to fully enjoy the moment.

I stopped by neverwinter again, he stated softly, to see if you and Kratos were still there. Mal told me you two left. D-did something happen? Mal told him he just stormed off one day, but never gave a reason. Phillip wondered if Zephyr would tell him himself.

The promise soothes his anxiety, cool water over the burning fear of losing Phillip yet again. He starts to take notice of his friend's condition, too — but that thought is quickly overshadowed by the mentions of Neverwinter Forest, Mal, and Kratos. Some... idiot showed up with Mal's kid, and I didn't want to deal with it, He says, tone making it clear that he doesn't want to discuss it further. And Kratos is... I don't know. Not here. A lot happened. Maman is here — Rosalie. A pause, and he pulls away slightly, gaze turning to the forest. I need to leave here. Kratos and I were going to make this our home... will you come with me? He looks back to Phillip, eyes bright yet unreadable. He's careful to guard the emotion flooding his thoughts, feeling the guilty tug of his promise to Kratos at the back of his mind. Part of him cries out against it, argues that he hasn't seen Kratos in months and the red-furred warrior is likely gone forever — but he still loves his mate, and he can't let go of his promise so easily. He'll try, the way he'd tried for his brother. And then... well, he doesn't want to think about that. He wants to find Kratos, and forget all these confusing feelings warring in his chest and belly whenever he looks at Phillip.

Mal had a child? He would’ve never thought of him as the father type. He was nearly as young as Phillip in his eyes, and he didn’t want kids. Well, to put it more accurately, he never thought of them. That’s something he wouldn’t dwell upon. Zephyr clearly didn’t want to discuss it any further, so it’d be left at that.

Kratos was gone, he was told, and Zephyr’s mother was with him. Rosalie’s her name. Hearing it gives him deja vu. He swore he’s heard it before, but couldn’t put a face to it despite his effort.

Again, he doesn’t think about that too long. His friend pulled away from him,  stared into his eyes, and asked if he’d come with him. Yes, of course! He doesn’t think twice yet again. He doesn’t need to. Wherever you go, I’ll follow.

He smiles when Phillip answers this time, a strange, rare, genuine expression on the wraith. Wherever you go, I'll follow. The words warm him, and he presses into the other boy again, preening his neck fur. Good, He murmurs into his neck, reluctant when he manages to pull himself away again to speak. I want to find somewhere we can make a home of our own, before spring when everyone starts being weird and spawning hoards of kids. Maybe if we find other people, we could make a pack — but I don't care if it's just us. And along the way, I'll search for Kratos. But he leaves that part unspoken, too afraid to voice his hopes this time. He'd never found Helios; why should Kratos be any different? His expression turns distant as he loses himself in thought, silver eyes unfocused now. His whole future is ahead of him, and he doesn't know what he wants, or where the intersection between reality and his desires lays; he doesn't know what it's safe to want. It makes him want to rip his skin off.

His promise brought a smile to Zephyr’s phase. It’s not something he saw everyday, if ever. It’s different, but in a good sort of way. Phillip’s heart went aflutter when he saw that smile, and wished he could see it again long after he’d buried himself in his fur again (the reason for that was unclear at this point). 

Zephyr wanted a home, but this time they wouldn’t be taking refuge under someone else’s roof. They’d build from the ground up, before spring comes and “everyone gets weird” (that was also unclear).

It’ll take work- he started. Phillip knew all too well how difficult finding a home was. -but.. but I’m happy to help.

wrap up here? <3

Phillip's voice somehow pulls him from his thoughts; where normally the words might have gone ignored, they draw his attention effortlessly. I appreciate you, He tells him softly, nosing his cheek fondly. After a moment, he adds, No matter what happens or where we end up, I promise I'll always protect you. Perhaps it's a little out of the blue — but after all that he's lost, he needs to make this promise. He needs to voice it so he knows he'll keep it.

yep!

“I appreciate you.” Those words really stuck with him. Phillip hadn’t felt appreciated in, well, he couldn’t recall. Certainly not during the last few months. Hearing that from Zephyr of all wolves made his heart soar. And his promise only makes it fly higher. God knows Phillip needs protection, and who better to do that than his dear friend?