Raven's Watch silverwave

"teekon doesn't fit anymore," teya answered more candidly than she had wanted. but it was true. being away from brecheliant brought such a relief that shame soon followed. the caldera made her feel numb, empty —
"i tell maia and eljay i maybe not come back." she cleared her throat a little. "their eyes..."
it hurt very much to think she was abandoning them, even if she knew she wasn't. her children were yearlings now and there were no more to come. grandchildren would fill brecheliant every year —
she felt herself start to cry, and fought it a bit, though she moved closer to bridget, desperate for a portion of the cardinal's nearness even if she would never let herself ask for it again.
"i like smiling more. i like feeling — better." not quite whole, but better. "and i like when i see you smiling." and it had always been that way. she fumbled and turned halfway, looking out over the stone expanse.