Foggy Bottom Way [m] el mar

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for the duration of his long silence, silvertongue did suspect he was considering his betrayal. he had confessed to crowfeather, but these were his children of his body. surely a man who meant honesty at his own detriment would contemplate a misguided lie to protect these young wolves. but they were not puppies. in the end, germanicus gave his sorrowful account and her eyes snapped blue-hot beneath their glaze of tears, to hear it! to know it! "you knew ramesses was an evil man. you knew him to be cruel. the queen already hated her attendants for catching the eye of her husband, and that is where you left me, germanicus," silvertongue added, breath shuddering; she scarcely noticed the other two now, her stare transfixed in great agony and hatred upon the man. "i fed him. i fed his queen. indeed, i fed them together. i fed his priest. i fed his servants. i fed his guardians. and when he was done with me," tears flowing hotly, "he traded me elsewhere under the guise of emissary work. and when they left me to ford the sea and almost drown, i fed the appetites of men until their protection saw me to the mountains, and mereo."

not enough

she loathed him. she loathed these children, obelisks to his successful life. "all you have done is rob me. thieved from me. first a life, second," her voice breaking, "the only man in the entire complete world who i could have loved, even after all that, cannot love me. he loves your father," silvertongue explained in sarcastic bleeding tone to the others. "i will never --" and she touched a paw to the belly she knew now to be scarred beyond all hope of another future. shadowpup and stormpup stood as their own sentinels, but they belonged to crowfeather and to ash paw and to riverclan; they were not her own and never had been. her efforts to avoid motherhood had not been successful until after the fact, a truth she had carried in silence for many months. as she had carried everything.

not enough

"so you see," silvertongue murmured softly, almost a lover's tone for germanicus, "this is why you must die. this is why i will kill you, here. your death restores nothing to my life. it is only payment for what you have taken from me, over and over. and it will never be enough."