Redhawk Caldera a knot in the wood; the song of a thrush

assuming he'd be accepted into the pack! AW but maybe @Amalia? <3

Today, he was hanging around the Hobbit Hole. The 'Hobby Ho,' as he'd called it as a youngster.

It was strange to be back. Especially without Caracal.

Every tree and turn reminded him of his friend. Not to mention the memories of Towhee, Fennec, Bronco. . . It felt as if ghosts lingered in every nook and cranny, and sometimes he questioned his decision to settle here. Had it been a good move for his psyche?

Killer sighed and settled outside the old whelping den, enjoying the feel of tiny snowflakes on the wind settling against his cheeks and temples. His fur was plush, body well-suited for this weather.

It was nice to be back—even if the nice held hands with the strange: every day, every hour.

Hello Lovely <3

It wasn't often that Amalia took to the higher elevations. Much preferring the lower areas and the lake itself. Where she could run and just exist. She didn't have to think about her next step. But today she felt a hunger for adventure hanging heavier on her.

Knowing that in part it had to do with the impending season coming and how crazy all of them got. She herself knew she would need to make a trip to her brother sooner rather than later so she didn't have another incident like last year. All the wolves that had converged upon her. It had been overwhelming and frightening.

A movement in her peripheral caught her attention and she swung her head to pinpoint a familiar figure. She smiled at him then. And shifted her trajectory and went towards his little slice of orbit.

Heya! She called out.

<3

As usual, the approaching dark woman had a near-instant positive effect on his mood. He gave her a smile and chuff and rose to his paws, shaking tiny ice crystals from his fur as he did so.

Hey, 'Mal, Killer drawled. Don't see you up around here much. What brings you to my humble abode?

For truthfully, the Hobbit Hole had become just that. He did his duties, hunted, patrolled, watched after the youngsters—but at the end of most days, he retreated here.

Killdeer had never liked being alone; the events of past moons had seemed to change that.

The ice crystals fell. Not heavy enough to leave a sound. But she imagined if they had been. They'd have made a lovely plinking sound.

A nickname. She smiled at that. Noone had ever called her Mal. She'd gotten Ama and Lia. A shrig of shoulders.

I was just walking and wanted a change of sceenery. I hope I didn't disturb you?.

A sweep of inky plume, brown tip a blur as she moved it.

He shook his head vehemently at her response. God, no, Killer assured her, grinning. C'mon up. I've just been daydreaming.

A few moments of silence fell before either one of them spoke again.

Hey, 'Mal—are your parents alive? I'm sorry if that's too personal of a question, he added hastily, casting an anxious glance her way. I've just. . .I dunno. I've been struggling lately, trying to make my peace with everything that's happened.

And she seemed like someone who was good to talk to. Safe to talk to. The only other living wolf he'd feel this comfortable talking about this with was Towhee. Bless his mother, but Fennec didn't much like Caracal, he thought, and he'd choke on his grief before bringing up Bronco to her.

A small smile as she scrambled up to him. It was always so nice up here. A little discombobulsting when one looked down, but good none the less.

Amalia nodded. Mmm. They were when Alaric and I left and our pack disbanded. They were on their way West with our sister.

She smiled. She didn't mind personal questions and if it helped even better. She liked to know the deep things, hated small talk was not very good at it.

I don't mind personal questions and if I do. I just won't answer.

She hadn't lost many in her life, but she knew of grief and how it could constrict you sometimes. How it made your heart heavy and broken.

Her answer was comforting, as was her assurance about personal questions—though he still was loath to make her feel uncomfortable. He'd latched onto the name 'Alaric,' though.

Boyfriend? Mate? No. If he were, he'd be here. Right?

And why did he care, anyway?

Okay, good, Killdeer replied. I'm glad to hear that for you. D'you know if they're very far away? 

He wondered where Fennec was now. There was a not-insignificant amount of guilt in parting ways with her—but they were both adults, and his mother could surely take care of herself.

Still. There wasn't a day that went by that he didn't feel somewhat bad about it.

Amalia wasn't often the uncomfy onw in conversations. It was usually the other way around. Not that it was always.


Amalia tilted an ear. Well Alaric, my brother he said they went the opposite way of us. So probably. He and I walked almost a year before we got here and him even longer. I got here before him.

She shifted and settled. Brown tipped plume stirring the frost on the ground.

I hope wherever they are that they are happy. Especially our dad. He is a difficult fellow, but he does love us.

Brother. His shoulders settled, albeit infinitesimally. He smiled at her description of her father, which so reminded him of Fennec.

That's my Ma. She can be pretty prickly, but I'll always love her, Killer remarked. Her folks called this caldera home for a very long time. I suppose that's why I'm drawn here.

Among other things.

It just sucks, thinking about. . .like, maybe I could have seen my Dad more. Or Caracal. And now they're gone, and I'll never ever get to see them again—and maybe I should have made the effort when I had the chance, you know?

He paused, lips firming in a frown. But how could I have known? They were healthy—they were still young. . . Killdeer's voice trailed off into the chilly breeze, and he cast his gaze downward, wondering about the absolute waste of it all.

Amalia as always was a little oblivious. She didn't see the movement of shoulders. Not that she possibly would've even paying attention. Talking of her parents made her miss them.

Our dad didn't like that we couldn't stay still amd were careless sometimes. He hated traveling and the stories Alaric and I loved. I think it was just fear for him.

She listened and saod nothing at first. What could she say really. He had lost two wolves he loved so much in a very short time.

Well from what you've told me. You always had fun with them and when you did see them you made the best of it. I think that has merit. And i would focus on that rather than the what ifs, should've, could've and would've. Because you did do all that you were supposed too with them. You loved them, laughed with them.

Fear. He could see it, though not for his mother. Fennec was stubborn, sure, and set in her ways—but he'd never consider her fearful. 

Killdeer leaned into her words, hoping they rang true. I guess, he replied, nodding. That's something, at least. Ah, it just sucks.

He nodded down the slope, in the direction of the rendezvous. But it sucks for them more—Teya's kids. They didn't get to know Bronco as well as I did. I guess that's why I'm here—if they can't have their Dad, then at least they can have their brother?

Killer glanced at Amalia, cocking his head. Why isn't Alaric here with you? he asked, curious.

Amalia's mother was much like that. Fearless. Except there had been fear towards the end of her father's reign when it all came apart. Fear for the future and for her children.

Amalia nodded. It does, but also grief is just sort of all the love we didn't get to give them. And when its strong it means the love was great in its size.

That is a nice and noble way of giving back to your dad. It really is.

She chuckled then. Because we would fight. Alaric and I are a lot alike in many ways and sometimes we press each others nerves. And he likes the danger the mountain provides.

He ceased talking, wanting her to speak more. He grinned at her description of Alaric. And then—

But we're kind of on a mountain now, Killdeer remarked, nudging her with a gentle shoulder. Even if it's not as jagged as your brother's.

He cocked his head. I get it, pressing nerves, he said. I can't imagine you pressing anyone's nerves, though. You're so nice!

His smile reached into his eyes and through to his heart.

She giggled and look3d bemused and a little sheepish.

I kno2, but have you seen the spear. Jagged ricks all over. And one plummet and that would be it.

She shuddered a little. But Alaric has always liked a little danger in his life. If I didn't love him so much I'd tell you he's nuts. Super smart, but whew.

Then she grinned. Not really hes good.

She laughed. Eyes dancing merrily. There have been a few who dislike my personality. It grates them. Some say I am too nice and they dislike that.

Her last remark brought true laughter from him, and he nudged her with his shoulder, gently but jovially. Nah, they're just grumpy, Killdeer said, grinning. You can't be too nice. I don't think anybody is really nice enough, actually.

Except for her. She was very, truly nice.

He let out a small, contented sigh, looking over the caldera's lake. The sun was falling lower; evening would soon be here, and then night.

I'm glad you're the way you are, he admitted, glancing at her. Thanks for listening to me rant, 'Mal.

She was glad to hear the laughter fly from his throat and glide down the mountain. Too long there had been a heaviness to the caldera. This fwlt a step in the brighter direction.

Thanks! a smile. At least aome people appreciated her.

The last rays of sunlight filtered onto the still frosty ground. Coloring it in gentle rose hues. Spring was coming, just around the bend.

She grinned. Of course. And I can listen anytime you know. I don't mind.

He smiled and leaned slightly against her, then hastily pulled away, in case that was too intimate a gesture for her. They were just friends, after all. 

But he'd engaged in such touch with his brethren at Mereo—should it be so different?

Suddenly, his stomach had tightened up, and he didn't know what to think. But he smiled at her all the same, cloaking the strangeness in his mind.

I should go, you know, do shit, he said, affecting casualness. You wanna go be a productive citizen with me?

She didn't move as he leaned in. Herself leaning. She hadn't thought anything of it. It was common place to take physical touch wasn't it? Even if the spot became very warm. And your cheeks sort of heated. She was just touch starved.

But Killdeer didn't lean in for long. She assumed he wasn't a physical touch sort of wolf. So she wagged her tail.

A laugh. Green eyes crinkling in delight. Okay. Let's go be productive citizens.