Fox's Glade she is collecting pieces of the broken hearts

backdated to yesterday (june 20th), would love for someone to tell her what the summer solstice is!

memories adorned with bittersweet tendencies stroll with languid indifference throughout her mind as she lingers at the edge of the humming glade. the meadow sprawls before her, a coruscating carpet of sun kissed vibrance whilst the breeze twirling above it carries the pleasing scents of flowering life towards the dove as she leaned back against the firm trunk standing sentry with its comrades around the nestled clearing behind her. she blinks ruefully to the dapples prancing across her paws with the rustle of the verdant canopy above, remembering regarding this very feat in what could be this exact spot all that time ago. 

in fact, as she is drawn back to the glow of the meadow, she can picture with painful ease the image of her as a mere child peering tentatively at the foreboding gloom in which present her currently resided within. a melancholic smile presses to angular features at the image. her parents had long since given up keeping her confined to the borders of swiftcurrent creek and had allowed the frequent trips to the lively meadow but on that particular day the whispered wanderlust had been too great to ignore and so she'd approached the enthralling treeline. of course, after overcoming any traitorous misgivings and plunging into the eddying gloom, it had become clear that this was in fact not a forest but a carefully protected gem. 

muscles shift to crane her neck as she gazes back into the clearing, the awe to have struck her the first time she'd witnessed the emerald glade with its babbling stream and carefully strewn rocks still stirring within her chest. and she half expected to witness the thundering lump of stormy fluff that was @Clay to come barreling towards her with disconcerting speed; his father not too far behind. 

her heart constricts tightly within the confines of her chest, flailing at the emotions spiralling throughout her. not quite sadness and yet not joy either, some strange inbetween that left her utterly breathless with its intensity. so much had changed since that day, too much to even begin to let her mind delve into. and yet despite the staggering strife to have been inflicted upon her over the past year, she cannot say that she is dreadfully unhappy with her life as of now. there are things she would do anything to have the control to change and recent events still struck her with cruel claws, but admitting she loved the home and wolves she resided with now was not a betrayal to those she lost and missed.

there is something dark looming over the male. exhaustion conquering his features and while there is still discernible strength about him it is equally indisputable he has fallen from previous grace. sinew and bone show more prevalent upon glancing at him. weight diminishing from lack of appetite and endless travel. time was supposed to quell the mind ridden with anxiety. that's what everyone said. why was he still subject to such spiritual torment? 

 he had forgotten what it was like to wander alone. he had not formally spoken the words relieving him of his duty from the empire and he supposed they still considered him a part of them in some way. he always would be. though, he wondered if reiko had decided to dismiss him in lieu of his free speech. perhaps she had grown tired of the retaliation he continued to deal her. the impassioned ramblings of the peasant eating at her impetuousness. perhaps, though, it had ceased to bother her at all and these engrossing thoughts of her were no more. perhaps reiko had turned to indifference to guard herself for the future. that was preferred over previous events continuing to unravel. 

 many nights and days had presented and passed as collision set out to clear his mind. a pilgrimage of serenity becoming his only hope to silence the mind. his eyes addressed the unfolding landscape with apathy. he wanted to feel again. this nonchalance was most tiring. 

  the colorless body of another begins to unfold in the distance. his eyes latch to her and he decides to attempt impromptu conversation. her frame modest and petite. he calls out to her with a soft lament. a chuff that is unmistakenly male and he stops in his tracks. he did not wish to frighten her away and return to his solitary. perhaps his sanity was slipping from hold and company was the key to remembering how to involve himself again. would she approach him? would she flee with interest for her safety? he was no crook, but how could she discern that?

a slight start as she stirs from her reverie, soft chuff rippling along the breeze to twirl about velveteen ears as curious eyes waste no time in pinpointing his location. instinct guides her to lighten the weight pressed upon the earth, muscles pushing into her toes lest she need to make a hasty escape but she is appreciative once noting his ceased movements. a clement smile is offered as she marvels at the way in which the shifting light streaming from the shivering canopy drops its gossamer glow upon him, spinning the shadows adorning his pelt into magnificent bronze. a swish of her feathery plume as her svelte figure steals across the dappled floor to close some of that yawning distance between them, pressing gaze unabashed in its intensity as she blinks up at the startling gold of his. and yet, there appears to be a weariness to him, something she can sympathize with all too well as melancholic shadows strangle the pierce of his glowing gaze. 

however she is met with pleased surprise by the scent adorning his burly figure, the pack from the mountain vale! this sparks more fervent in her smile, eager at the potential information she could gather for valette about his pack. but she must sate herself lest she frighten him off with off the bat interrogation and so with a slight bird like cock to her head; she'd lilt by means of greeting "beautiful here, isn't it?" and awe pressed eyes would skip from the mountain man to sweep over both the lustrous meadow and tranquil glade beaming and humming on either side of them.

the hesistance he holds is not due to her. he is fearless of new faces. yet he is concerned with what he will do. is he capable of maintaining conversation? had he dared to put himself in the presence of another when too much turmoil existed within? it is too late now and he reminsces of his time alone. the distraction preferred. 

 she arrives and he observes her. noting her willowy shoulder blades and silvery curls. she is youthful and glowing beneath the kiss of the sunlight. Collision does not note her beauty as he sees no such thing. to him she becomes another, currently, unmentionable face. 

 she dismisses the silence and her voice were sweet, compelling; laced in delicate mercy. her head betwixt like a curious child and collision offers a charming smile. his eyes move towards eternal skies and he observes alongside her. "refreshing," he commends and his eyes fall back to her. she appears to truly appreciate this place. he wondered what brought her here. 

 the scent she bares is equally unique and unknown. he knows absolutely nothing of the hollow that holds her and makes no connection. perhaps it is simply her own. it would seem there is too much going on, however. "pleased to meet you, miss. my name is collision," a kind smile remains as his tail moves behind him in content fervor. she is a gentle soul--that much he can see.

a satisfied nod at his extol is granted as her ardent look flicks back to glimmer upon him. having already been in quite the reminiscent state, she cannot help but wonder idly what exactly will this man mean to her a year from now. will this be the only time they ever meet and as time trudges on shall memories deem them but an affable stranger met one summer day? or like clay shall their histories come to intertwine in bizzare ways that neither of them could ever have predicted. eyes drift to the coruscating canopy, leaves shivering at the touch of the sprightly breeze that tugged at both her and her company's own curled hairs. if she'd never met clay and his father that day than would she ever have joined easthollow? no, it went much further back than that; she never would have even fallen into the clawed clutches of the nightwalkers. what exactly would her life be like now had she never breached the gloom of the daunting treeline the same day that the easthollian prince had ventured forth with his father? she blinks back to the man, feeling inexplicably jittery at the riveting energy squirming within as her conjecture taunted her mind further; would her decision to visit the glade today have the same rioting effect on her future? her heart skipped feverishly. 

collision. she grins, a tad touched to be referred to something as mature as miss. her head dips in a polite nod before returning "pleased to meet you collision, i'm polaris" she rolls her shoulders back, allowing haunches to ease her into an easy sit as she regards him with open curiosity. why is he all the way out here? a scout perhaps, gathering information on the nearby territories? yet she cannot shake the inkling that there is something dragging on his soul, perhaps more noticeable to her now that she too carried fresh scars upon her conscience. yet it seems much too personal to pry on such a matter and so she settles with inquiring "you come from the mountains right? what brings you here?"

her gaze is tugged to the distant peaks, still cringing a little inwardly at their brazen display. her trip with west had surely helped a lot, she'd no longer hesitate in the face of their sneering slopes and of course the fact that they had in fact not been successful in the destruction of her family was a large factor in itself and yet...the memory of their rage was far from forgotten. her chin tips upwards a little, no she'd never trust those slumbering beasts but no longer did she live in fear of them. hell she was stronger then that.

they were creatures of social necessity and even the darkest of their kind yearned for the occasional embrace of another. even the furthest from social understanding seemed to desire to be surrounded in numbers of their own alignment. perhaps that was why it was so easy to gather among strangers and conversate. 

 a subtle breeze jostled his fur and he found himself enjoying the momentary touch. a reminder that he could still feel despite his detached state of mind. he stares at her as she introduces herself and then finds comfort sitting before him. she had nothing to fear here. no harm would befall her for the time-being. 

 her name is no different to him than the many faces he had met. all were so unique with their titles. all hailing from different backgrounds. Reiko, Yuudai, Hiromi all hailing from some far north place where they adorned names of common descent. he wondered if polaris also resided with those that held a close heritage and this was how she adopted her name. his was simple. clash, crusade, collision--all affiliated titles that had carried a generation. 

 "i do. i needed to get away. time for oneself is valuable, and it's my time," there's too much to say about why...

 the thoughts like water heavily beating on a dam threatened to burst forth. a perfect stranger he could come clean to, but he refrains. this was not the time or place and she didn't deserve to waste her time on such a terrible tale. it wasn't for her ears. he didn't want it on his own. 

 "distractions are nice. i prefer to spend them in nice places with nice company. what about you?" his head cranes ever so slightly to the side curiosity thick. and did she come with a guard? who protected the svelte woman? who would close the door to harm and assure no wrong-doer came upon her? perhaps he was calculating wrong and she was far more capable than his given assessment.

she is blinking out at the flamboyant display of each flower's sprightly dance throughout the meadow when collision speaks, making a mental note to bring alsek here at some stage. the little raven boy would certainly find joy in the splendour of this carpet adorned in such bold vibrancy. she squints a little when turning back, adjusting to the contrasting gloom stroking its shadows around them both under the sheltered canopy. a quick nod at his affirmation, pleased at her success despite having not doubted it for a moment. but she cannot resist the claws of curiosity as she nips thoughtfully at her lip, she is no stranger to the need to let wanderlust paws follow the hum of the breeze and guide you swiftly forth from the confines of your territory but...as he continues her hunch is strengthened, his reasons for this trip must go beyond the yearn to wander if he sought distraction, right? she's not sure why she cares quite so much, sure it is no joy to her to witness the internal turmoil of another but the vehement nature of her desire to learn what exactly troubles him catches her by surprise. perhaps it simply comes down to wanting her own form of distraction, to fruitlessly play at figuring out someone else's going on's is an appreciated break from dwelling on her own. 

"yes, distraction in the form of company certainly is always welcome" she hums in mused agreement, recalling her own such antics in the outlandish stretch of time spent between the whitebark stream and easthollow borders. looking back on it now felt like witnessing some odd fever dream and she shifts a little uncomfortably, having no desire to let her mind take that trip right now. "my home's just over there" she explains, listlessly gesturing in the direction of the hollow's borders as she continues "i just love how beautiful and serene this place is, a lot of wolves from the outside see it as but a forest and hence continue on without giving it a second glance. you have to brave the gloom to realise its just a dense treeline with this gem embraced within" her features seem to glow with fervour when she speaks of their winsome surroundings, pushing to a smooth stand as she prowled past the trees with an inviting swoop of her tail for him to follow. 

presuming he too rambled forth, she'd settle amongst the glade's verdant clutch beside its humming stream; relishing in the sun's full potent as it stroked the curves of her svelte figure. allowing her lustrous look to trail the progression of a butterfly, she'd ask curiously "i don't mean to pry...but i happened to pass the fringes of your pack not too long ago and i'm very curious since i believe you's are relatively new, what's it like? actually, i'm getting ahead of myself- what's it called? mine's named easthollow, to make it fair" she abandoned visually pursuing the delicate critter to look upon him once more, enjoying the way in which the sun's kiss truly brought his sleek pelt to life with glowing lustre.

his eyes could behold no beauty upon looking at this place and it was a devastation to know the true nature of the boy and know that he saw the world, presently, in greyscale. perhaps soon color would return and adorn that which he so used to find pleasure in yet for now he clings to this abandonment of hope. equally, for some unknown reason, he clings to the company of this stranger. there is some foreign enjoyment in having someone to speak with and an even deepened interest in knowing his core essence remains in tact, for he still feels the pull to guard her whilst her presence is kept. 

 her reconciliation of his feeling is met with a modest simper and he offers a quieted hum. gaze turns in the direction she beckons towards and he notes that it leads to her home. he finds her face once again with curiosity.  his knowledge of the lands limited even after all of this time for he had found home so quick...and seemed to be forsaken all the quicker. 

 he finds appreciation for her ability to see the uniqueness of the landscape and he seeks out the key points that she notes. as if they become illuminated to him and he has to agree. 

 as the observation draws close she rises and beckons to him as she moves. he follows without thought. he had opened the door to an audience with her and now the favor has been repaid. he felt her a credible character and there is no qualm to be held for continuing with her. 

 she finds a place nearest the water and settles on a bed of grass. sun kisses her silvery curls and emboldens her budding figure. she is full of life, exuding grace, and the gold descending the heavens becomes her. collision steps to the light and follows to again remain a respectful distance from her. she is but a new face and he is no one to her. his smile has disappeared at mention of the empire and he finds strength to swallow away the story, but his reply comes out almost monotone and quite manufactured, "the reneian empire lead be empress reiko. she calls it a kingdom and she leads by following the sun and stars. something along those lines. she has a deep belief in the skies and i wager they direct some of her decision," unless they told her to marry that imbecile. then she was as much a fool. 

 "do you like it? easthollow?" with his limited knowledge he knows not of the wolves that form the close knit family and he is unable to associate that some of the faces he works alongside are quite close knit with wolves there. were they allies? was there someone out there other than kaistleoki?

although perhaps easy to deem her as but a whimsical sprite, distrait in her frequent marvels, polaris does not lack astute vigilance. it is with a slight furrowing of slender brows that she notes the departure of his clement smile at her query on his pack, such a motion feeding the hungering curiosity licking its fire within. ears tilt to attention at his response, eyes wide in their intrigued wonder as she carefully holds the key points, zeal already bubbling at the thought of getting to tell valette that she'd gathered information on one of the teekon's newer residents. reneian empire, it sounded regal, proud....and led by a reiko, an unfamiliar name but stowed away with equal care. she found fascination in the amount of groups set up throughout the vast territories, all varying so greatly in both location and alignment. one thing however...."a kingdom?" this was new to her, having only lingered within the clutch of packs centered around family asides from the nightwalkers, whom she deemed as but a nonsensical group of barbarians, she was quite unfamiliar with the notion of a monarchy and was eager to remedy this. 

irradiant gaze lifts now to peer upon hazy skies, quite interested by this leading style. she could understand it, the ethereal nature of the sun, moon and stars as they winked down on the little infinitesimal beings that venerated their very existence were indeed enthralling. however, as in tune in nature as she was, polaris was not a creature kissed by the spiritual ilk and so it was difficult to imagine allowing these celestial bodies to determine how you should treat your wolves. "she must trust them a lot" she muses, slender snout still tilted upwards "the sun, moon and stars i mean. they inspire wonder in me yes but, they're so detached from us, i'd struggle to trust them to care about us all enough to base how i lead my wolves on their antics alone." she looks back to the melancholy sentry, timidly asking, unsure as to whether it crossed any boundaries "does it work well for you's? their influence on her decisions?" 

when the conversation is focused upon her once more, the little dove would shift her weight with an exultant smile as her head dipped in a quick nod. "i love it" she affirms without dubiety and as her focus shifts idly to where lush blades of grass stretched across minute paws, she added softly "they took me in when i had nothing, they believed in me" a hasty shrug then, eyes lifting just enough to focus not without a touch of rue upon the babbling stream. she owed a lot to valette and her people.

if he could feel the pull of the empire as once he had perhaps he would have worded the decription differently. perhaps his portrayal would sound less rehearsed and more illuminating, but he were bereft of this feeling. defeat and lack of complete truth bridling his words. reiko carried the description of a galactic fanatic and that was somewhat untrue. still, he would not wager it a lie neither. 

 his body morphs before her and he lays comfortably upon the earth. paws reveal a mind of anxious tendency and they subconciously knead at the dirt, "yes. reiko is our empress. ibis, our queen...that does sound peculiar, hm?" the ranks were always curious to him. a collaboration of a dynasty and a monarchy. perhaps she would pay no mind to their strange ways. maybe she would. 
 
 collision supposed that the twinkling diamonds, the torrid sun, and the thrill of the shape-shifting moon would implore one to believe they held some power. he had never heard the call, "yes and no," his explanation begins to form and become more clear. perhaps he can puzzle the colloqy together, "she doesn't impose the belief on us. i don't suppose i have the same trust...her decisions...it's not really my place to speak on them, is it?" it was the first time he had come to the cognizance that she was their leader and his tongue had been too quick. it was never his place to speak so harshly against her. "she was a good leader," he spoke in past tense without notice. 

 he remembers when he was believed in and jealousy bares its nasty teeth as she describes her home and the feelings she holds. he...had that. he prayed that she would always keep to such feelings. that those who had crafted the confidence for her would grow it always. "who leads you? they sound quite respectable," and from the fallen reneian it was quite the compliment.

his body lays itself upon the cushioned floor and she finds her gaze inadvertently tugged to the stirring of large paws, idle blink as they kneaded restlessly upon the pliable bank. a familiar motion considering polaris' own difficulty to remain sated in stillness for long, or the tendency she carried to use movement to alleviate stress. but before she can dwell much on such a small tick and what it may contribute to her budding suspicions that fed an ever growing trickle of concern for the affable man, he spoke and snatched her focus back to the foreign concept on which his pack was built upon. head tilts again in that quick bird like movement, tail fluttering where it lay amongst curling blades as she ran these terms over her mind; empress, queen? utterly alien to the girl and yet, they sounded so...."powerful" she breathes, the word deserved to be held only by those of blazing potent, she had a thrilling suspicion that it took a lot to live up to such a title and it sparked a hunger within to meet those that considered themselves moxie enough to brand themselves so. 

it took a moment to stir enough from the grasp of her reverie to realise that her blurt had led to an abruptly dead end and she'd grin a little bashfully before adding with haste "sorry! those titles i mean, they sound pretty powerful but no, i've never ever heard of them before. i like them though....do you know if they mean anything?" how utterly enthralling though, a kingdom led by an empress and her queen, what beautiful names! it all seemed rather eternal, as if she were uncovering something ancient and revered. a curious glance at his contradictory reponse as she shifts her position, eager to hear where such a statement would take them next. lips are tugged down in the place of a thoughtful frown, vigilant press to her look deepened as it narrows. polaris tended to be quick to announce her opinions before pondering too hard on them, and so her jaw had already loosened in preparation to launch her return to that query when he swooped in first with a finishing statement. was? this got stranger by the second and he appeared...well if she was honest he seemed conflicted more than anything. studying him for a few moments of stirring silence; she'd finally muse mildly "i disagree, being a leader doesn't just mean wielding the power it...it means you have the responsibility of caring for those you offer your home to. it is completely your place to speak on it, adapting your ways to keep those you lead content is what makes a good leader. leaders still need to learn too, and how will they ever do that if their wolves feel they shouldn't speak up? in my opinion, a strong leader is one who does what they must to look out for those that trust in their guidance, it can take great bravery to change your ways for the greater good"

her voice would trill with vehemence by the end of her spiel, chest rising and falling swiftly with the buzz of it. yet she'd find herself glancing sheepishly at pale paws in the aftermath, ears tilting back; had that all been just a bit too gung ho? licking at her lips, she'd rub a paw back and forth along the dampened earth whilst mumbling "sorry, i hope i didn't overstep there. i don't know your leader of course and that obviously wasn't directly aimed at her i just feel...well you always deserve a say you know?" a look of kissed lustre would lift back to rest upon his reclined figure, oh what could it be that chewed at him so? like an irksome tick settled just out of reach, helpless to do anything but writhe under whilst it stubbornly festered. 

ardent smile graces her features once more, invigorated nod expressing her agreement as she lilts "we're led by the matriarch valette and her mate, the patriarch greyback. they are quite amazing, so kind and yet...so strong too, valette is like family to me already" she shrugs it off like its nothing but the gleam to the look that blinks off in the distance of the hollow betrays her bliss in itself. a few moments pass in which she allows the hum of of the whimsical breeze tickling the nearby trees and the reassuring babble of the stream to twirl at the fringes of veleveteen ears before inhaling deeply and shifting focus back to her company. there was no harm in asking right? he didn't have to answer if he didn't wish to after all.

"can i ask you something? you don't have to answer if i'm prying into something i shouldn't or perhaps i'm wrong altogether but are you...are you alright? you seem uh" okay this was way harder to word appropriately than she'd figured, she really ought to get better at just keeping her mouth shut. "i guess you just seem like something's bothering you and sometimes it's easier to share that with a stranger than someone you know so if you'd like to talk about anything, please feel free to" a hopeless shrug then, ears pressed to her head as she blinked off; utterly flushed. talk about making a shamble of things but, after everything with papa, hadn't it been strangers she'd wished to surround herself with in the early days? the idea of facing those she knew too difficult to bear, she hated feeling helpless in any situation and so if she was correct about his melancholy and if lending an ear could help then she'd want nothing more.

She is a doe like woman. Petite in frame, seemingly cautious, and yet curious about the world she lives. Her observations admittedly astute. Collision offers her the warmth of a smile despite his nervous ticking at the end of his little tale. Things were simple where he came from. A leader: The alpha. Ranks descending in titles decorated as Beta, Gamma, so on, and so forth. Adjusting the way that things were done in the Teekon had become amusing. Even their sister pack, Kaistleoki held a different way of doing things. The system an ever changing lyric depending on the tune to which a band gathered. He supposed it made sense. No gathering was the same and thus could not be expected to function the same.

 A single word drips from her tongue. Powerful. He finds himself questioning it for the first time. Was powerful a word he would equate to his Empress? Of this he wasn’t certain, but perhaps the definition of the word had become stale to him. Reiko was not powerful in the same way he was powerful. She was powerful in her ways of appealing. The way she presented things and the ways in which she tried. Collision couldn’t quite bring himself to think her physically strong, however. Insulting, maybe…but he remained truthful in his thoughts regarding his leader. Presently, he noted that he didn’t think the word indulged her. Reiko had grown weak as her power had been taken away. As Takeshi had poisoned her mind, body, and soul. There was an ember glowing within her, however, and perhaps she would return more powerful than once ever she had been.

 She speaks. Her opinion on the matter becoming quite clear and, honestly, comes some clarity for his festering mind. It wasn’t Reiko who was the weak leader. It was Takeshi. A man fueled to think it was in support of him he would become great. A man who relied on his strength and his harsh tendencies to gather his power and somehow think he would keep it. It wasn’t a good method. His downfall wasn’t far off. If Yuudai didn’t bring him down then Collision would step in and do so through any means necessary. If that meant offering his own life: So be it.

 She offers apology for her speech and Collision’s eyes fall off into the distance, “No apology necessary,” He swallows, his throat tight, and his mind seeking to organize all of the words that threatened to spring forth. There was so much chaos and he sought peace among it all. This was the first moment in which things seemed to settle in so long. It was becoming clearer and clearer what his future needed, “Things change. We change…and sometimes this is against our own will–I think. We’re all exposed to situations that might deter how we handle situations. I don’t think my silence was, originally, forced. I think I became content with allowing myself to act only physically and without thought,”

 As she trills her story things become quite clear to him. Valette. Greyback. Those names….Where had he heard them? Like a cloud lifted he was quite aware they were the ones that Vespera had told him and Yuudai of in the Empire. The description due to them by this pale woman was so very different than the one delivered by the Reneian woman. He hadn’t thought that there was two sides to the story he had received that day. Something perhaps he should of, but as events in the empire unfolded he became more and more aware that he needed to consider the man perspectives involved. The story Vespera had told him being a secondary or tertiary issue and he had only accepted it for what it was. This was something new entirely.

“I’m glad that you’ve found such honorable company in a good-life. It is all that I wish for anyone. Stranger or friend,” He affirms with a smile and a nod, his eyes have fallen back on her, and his world seems to stop as she notes his obvious discomfort. The creature that rumbles around his mind screaming and yet it has become a humbling sound. A sigh drifts from betwixt inky lips and his gaze again finds anywhere but her eyes. Perhaps it is easier to speak to a stranger. Yet–he still cannot have her looking into the tattered soul. How had he become so vulnerable?

“It all started out so slowly.  A good home, a good place, with good family. It’s slowly been perverted and at times I don’t know if it can be stopped. I don’t know if I’m strong enough to stop it? I don’t know if I’m meant to. I came to the Empire long ago and swore that I wanted to guard the happiness they had built….Now it all seems so fake,” His voice is reminiscent, his body soothed as though he’s waited so long to say these things aloud, “I made a promise. One I have to see through to the end, but honestly I don’t know what my future holds beyond that. I guess it’s the unknown that’s more daunting than anything else. I have to hope that at the end of the day I’ll think my efforts were, at least, enough,” That was the trouble wasn’t it: Was he enough?

i am sorry for the monster post omg

the sun kisses drops of liquid gold upon the water's dancing surface, enrapturing gleam of a beauty so pure that it stung at the clouded eyes of mortals that dared focus their greed upon the earth's frivolity. and yet, polaris found herself trapped in its treacherous clutch, unable to tear salt stung eyes from the rolling lights perched upon the mettlesome stream. it snakes forth barbed tendrils reeking of deja vu and the dove feels herself frowning, chilled as if the cool waters had hugged at her very figure. and as quick as it came, it passes over like an irksome cloud and with a mere shiver she is freed. how peculiar. shaking her head to remove the last scraps of the dwam clinging on stubbornly, she chose to pin it down as but whispers of distant memories spent along the creek. with the recent arrival of serpentine figures prowling hungrily through her mind, hissing in her dreams, it didn't come as much of a surprise for something as simple as the way in which the very water stole the sun's proud beams as its own to evoke some sort of recollection of her own creek staring back in such a manner. 

her look is torn roughly from the shivering surface, jaw tight despite maintaining an otherwise relaxed demeanour. the glade hummed merrily, light cradling each and every specimen flourishing under her glow- including polaris. a steadying inhale as she straightened, focusing on the way in which the warmth pressed against her skin, seeped languidly into pale bones; screw the fucking shadows- they were perverse and weak; doomed only to exist in the absence of light. no denying they were sly, they would steal your loved ones and beat you into the dirt whilst crooning in your ears and coaxing you away from the brightness. but in the end, all it took was to ignore them and remain tall in the light's embrace and you would persevere, you would win. she would allow nothing to convince her otherwise and she would not let the gloom of the tainted parts of her mind to spread their plague; they would be chased out. because to let the fate of her papa's passing, to have him associate with what lured her into the grasp of tenebrous claws- that would be the ultimate betrayal. and polaris was not going to betray him again. 

ears flutter to catch the rumbled words of her company, hasty blinks removing her focus from the intricate caverns of her mind and back to the wayward sentry. his response is well mused and appreciated in its depth as she mulls quietly over what lingered beneath each syllable to tumble from the melancholic parting of his weary jaws. it is certainly not untrue and polaris blinks off towards the presumptuous mountains, to where she knew the graveyard of swiftcurrent creek lay nestled by what had ultimately caused its family's downfall. she supposes, if she looks hard at the young girl that stands in the place of the child that had wondered at the world from the creek's borders, she could see the ways in which the world had pulled and prodded at her to mould her to suit its wishes. she was sharper, angrier, somehow both braver and weaker than the child that had trusted in the world and her beauty, refusing to see the festering cruelty that rotted beneath the pretty smile. 

she is quite randomly reminded of meeting the moonspearian wolf all that time ago. when he had acknowledged the nightwalker stench taking up residence on her pelt she had fled in fear of what that knowledge would mean for how he would treat her. it was with a scrap of confidence that she could confirm she would never have fled such a situation now, in fact she never would have fallen prey to the nightwalkers in the first place but....she had also smiled and relished in the beauty of the world when discovering fireflies with him; if she were trapped in such a place of darkness now would she still have it in her to marvel at these wonders? or deem them as nonsensical things the world used to aid her allure and keep us under her pressing finger? she wonders how he has been shaped by the happenings of life, and what situations had stolen parts of him and offered other things to replace them with? "the lives we live and what happens in them certainly changes us all, i am a victim to it as are you and as is nearly anyone you will come across in these wilds but...i believe we may have more control over it than we even like to believe. sometimes it is easier to blame the world itself, hell i do it all the time but...we let it do these things to us. two very different wolves have told me the same thing in terms of loss, one of them told me it to be supportive and the other told me it to be malicious and yet the message was pretty much the same; we endure these horrible things and they will change us in their severity but...it is up to us how we let it change us and we have to remember that."

she blinks back to his gleaming figure, weary smile pressed to charcoal lips. black hat had said it to her in the hopes that he could lure her into the nightwalker's shadows, use her pain to warp her into a bitter soldier under the pretense of calling it strength whilst valette had told her it hoping that she could take those words and realise that she had the power to live a life that those passed on would have wished for her, one that she wouldn't look back on with regret when the day came that she too would return to the earth. "i hope that whatever it is that has made you believe that silence is the answer...i hope you can find it in yourself to stand above it, to think about what you deserve and fight for it. i think it might be one of the hardest things to do and honestly i don't know if i've mastered it yet but i am trying, and i suppose that's good enough right now" teeth fumble with the delicate skin of her lip as she looks back to the swaying grass curling over her paws. it isn't that she's not used to talking to strangers, she'd always enjoyed conversing with different beings but it was not often that she delved this deep into the misgivings and hopes of her mind with even those she knew well. it was both uncanny and liberating, the two intertwining in a way that made her heart press hard at her chest and left her in some ways breathless. 

a dainty smile at his words as she hums back "thank you- and i'm not sure on your situation collision but i hope you too manage to find such a thing" she supposes she was lucky in that sense. she'd grown up with parents that had been strong, cordial and stalwart alphas and although that had been robbed from her much too early and she'd fallen in with the barbaric ruffians that were the nightwalkers for a while, she'd eventually fled them and gotten to stay with ronan in amethyst keep, all affable wolves, until strong enough to return to the teekons and seek shelter in the potent easthollow. if budding suspicions were correct in assuming that something in renian empire was causing him strife, would he find the strength to overcome it or if such a thing were not possible, to leave it all behind? it was not as easy as it sounded to leave, she understood that much. but it really did make all the difference if you could succeed.

but he does not shut dowm her offer and that is certainly something in itself as the girl listens to the desloate man spin his tale. and there is something about the raw emotion riding upon the words twisting through the air that lodges them so deep within her chest as wide eyes focus only on him. for her own nerves are still tender from the way in which they have been rubbed raw from unyielding affliction- she understands and so does he, how it feels to have something you love stolen and robbed from you whilst you are powerless to do anything but pace helplessly in the sidelines. but there is a difference, he can do something, and he needs to know that. swallowing, her gaze does not falter from him as she speaks "i don't know what it is that has done this to your home but....i'm very certain collision that you are strong enough, the only thing that threatens that is you doubting yourself. you need to just believe that you can do it and do everything you can to make that true but..." she frowns, adding with less certainty as she mulls further over what he'd said "it has to be worth fighting for, don't waste yourself away trying to change something that does not deserve it and, i don't think anyone really knows what the future holds. they can hope and suspect but...i think you will be happier regardless of your where you are in your future if you know you at least did everything in your power to try and change what you want to change or be where you want to be, even if you fail."

a quick shrug then as she finally looks away and mumbles to the strengthening breeze "i don't know your complete situation though and we are different wolves but i really do think you just need to believe in yourself, i've only known you a little while and you already seem like an honourable wolf to me, and if you don't think that then do something to make yourself realise it, i've met a lot of amazing wolves and i think they've all helped me realise how important trusting your own abilities are. especially when the world itself doesn't seem to have your back."

She is so lost in thought, pressed into the passing moment they share with one another and Collision briefly wonders what it is that goes through her mind. Excusing it as none of his business. Though, it was fair to argue that she had queried him of his own thoughts and he could do much the same? Alas, he was in no place to offer thoughts of his own. He was in no state of mind to return the favor of advice. She was the stronger, mentally, in their greeting. He found himself wishing he was in a better place. She was a respectable girl and it was considered, had he been in higher spirits, there would have been enjoyment to be had. This was something he was well aware he would not be able to do this day.

Her advice…her encouragement–it was to believe in himself. How? How was he supposed to think he had the strength to keep going through the motions and give his devotion to those that it didn’t seem to matter anymore: To Reiko. If it hadn’t been for his friendship to Yuudai, Vespera, an Hiromi he already would have run off. He already would have abandoned the Empress to continue in her fruitless efforts. Naturally, he knew this to be a lie. Even if not for them and the bond they were all forging he would want to liberate Reiko from the hell she had cultivated for herself. He would want to make sure the life for her and her children became rich and prosperous. Takeshi was in the way of all of it. Not for too much longer; he prays.

 He felt a peace in her presence. For a moment he didn’t feel weak or like he was incapable of achieving the goals set before him. For a moment he thought himself strong enough to actually do it. That was what she suggested: To simply believe in himself. Though, after all of the events that transpired he found himself wondering what about himself he was supposed to believe in. Was this all manufactured? Was this all some long test? Perhaps it was another tribulation he faced to see what he would do. This was Valhalla all over again to see if he had it within himself to change the course of destiny. Yuudai would emerge once more, he would smite the unholy one, and their lives could return to normal.

No, this was their new normal.

A sigh falls from betwixt inky lips and he sits himself upright before her. She had been through it herself to speak so carefully and to actually make a good point. Collision didn’t like when advice was given from those with no ability to understand. This was not the case. Polaris had faced uncertainty at one time and had overcome it. That was the only conclusion the grey man was capable of coming to. To hear the support, from she who knew nothing of him, be sung so unabashedly brought Collision to turn his gaze from her and his eyes to find a new focus far into the distance. Tears threatened their way out of his eyes as his throat tightened in immediate discomfort. He was incapable of speaking for a long moment past when she finished. There was no argument: She was right.

 Many moments pass, many uncomfortable minutes, before he finds himself ready to answer her (though certain she would understand had he not) he finds himself able to speak once more, “The rewards of this adventure will be worth it to the others. It will answer some questions about myself. There are things I need to see through until the end, but that doesn’t mean I’m dismissive of the fact there will be long-standing consequences to my involvement in all of this. There will be relationships that will never return, but it’s all for a greater good,” He finds himself with a small smile on his face. If @Reiko never spoke to him again but she was happy then he would never question that he had made the right decision.

“To sacrifice one’s self to the benefit of another is the greatest form of love one can offer–the greatest sign of friendship,” Collision now looked her directly in her eyes and he knew he would never regret these things again, “I’d give up everything for another to have a happy life any day. That's what I believe about myself,” After all, who was he to argue destiny? Who was he to be above the odds?

limbs slacken further, reclining the girl so that she too lays within the grass' featherlight clutch. lissom figure stretches languidly so that paws drape across the bank; toes toying with the sprightly liquid shivering below. how she feels in that moment is quite uncannily contradictory. in ways she feels at complete ease, the way in which the man had faced the sorrows and regrets dragging at his conscience with such unblemished honesty allowing her too to feel at peace with the messy confusion she'd fallen victim to the past month. there was no pressure to pretend here, guilt did not accompany any inner admittance that she was pissed at the world and although she was healing, she still felt pretty close to shit a lot of the time. and yet...she also feels rubbed raw, sore and on edge. the melancholic strum of thought provoking wonderings having guided her own mind to delve into truths about herself that she had not even thought to focus the spotlight upon before. shadows that had long since settled within the hidden nooks and crannies of her mind suddenly disturbed and vengeful as they hissed and writhed. 

alas that was the nature of life, is it not? she glares with unabashed fervour at muttering ink stains, drawing them to a hasty still. they fight and fight and fight, a neverending war against sneering darkness so that they can taste the light one last time. bathe in what made life so worth fighting for, love...euphoria... beauty...yes they endured this endless skirmish to sate guilefully implanted greed for these eternal cravings just one last time. oh the world, she was so very crafty. what exactly did she tempt the sun and moon with? what was it that they desired so fervently that led them down the similar path of partaking in this war, what is it that caused them to play eternal sentry to the universe? 

an ear flicks, dwam kissed look travelling to her companion as he moves to sit. such a minute movement and yet it sparks a thrill of zeal throughout the dove, as if such a shift of position is a declaration of his intentions to persevere in this game. a renewed determination to succeed. for a while they are accompanied by languorous silence and polaris doesn't mind, after such an ardent spiel, she is more than pleased to take a moment to regain her footing whilst remaining sprawled along the bank. she attempts to avert her gaze, unsure if she might have brought up disconcerting thoughts of his own that he'd rather not be goggled at whilst trying to regain order. but oh how she wished to know what exactly was he thinking, curiosity tugging her forth where she found herself weakest. and as a result, scintillating look would find itself flickering across his figure more than once as he stared off at vague distances.

and just as she was beginning to wonder had she plunged him into permanent quietude, he spoke. and it is so honestly profound....what she sees before her is a protagonist of good, a hero and considering that there is nothing else she herself would rather be, it is overwhelmingly moving. it is her turn to push back up to a terse sit, lustrous gaze keen on his, emotion flushing the guttering light. why is it that she feels threatened by the threat of tears? smile blossoming across angular features as she now stands, plume flicking friskily at her heels. "you must see" she breathes, left breathless by the progression of a thundering heart "that those words, spoken so honestly, prove enough that you are capable. you...you're amazing collision, to just acknowledge such things and remain determined in the face of it..there is a rarity to that. i believe in you i really do." eyes drop now, ears leaning back a little as she cannot deny the blush to press with heat upon her face at such an intense outburst. always the case wasn't it? blurt exactly what hopped into her mind before filters even had a chance to consider being applied and wonder after was it perhaps a bit too much. 

biting at her lip, she glances back up with a quick shrug. "i can't say the world will be any nicer to you for doing what is right but....you'll know and i think you will love yourself more for it and that's so important" swallowing, head would tilt as that clement smile continued to grace features "and perhaps this is a bit premature of me but...well you've got a friend in me okay? and please, don't put too much pressure on yourself alone...i will always be eager to help should you need it going ahead." and that was why they'd always win, because light was not just one independent being..it was made up of the determination and love of millions of souls and even when one fell, their energy remained locked within them all.

Polaris he begins to equate much to a bird. There is a freedom about her; unabashed. She seems the kind to go where the seasons bring her and yet the kind to know, always, where home is. A gentleness like an ocean tide. Capable of moving continents and yet all soothing in the reticent subversion. He clings to her words and the confidence she instills in him and wonders a moment if she believes these things as fiercly as she claims. Does she know them to be true of herself? Does she know that being able to be so resolute; being able to be so intense gives her more influence than the typical subsistence?

 He bathes in the words. They pour over his ears with warmth and Collision offers her, readily, the most amicable smile he has thus far. There is an ease on his heart and for a moment it is not a thundering abyss. For now he has attained harmony within himself and while he knows it not to be a perpetual feeling--he greets it with the familiarity of a long lost friend. The kind one can find asbolute understanding with even after so long bereft of one another. 

 She declares them friends without missing a beat and his tail picks up the lost thrum gently prodding against the earth. He only wished to find friendship--the enduring kind from most creatures. There were those inept to kindness and he would pray for them...or perhaps be their destruction. That was, ultimately, their decision to be made. 

 "I'll proudly call you my friend, Polaris," And he silently hoped that the levity of those words be understood by her given his prior proclamation. She knew that having a friend in him meant a steadfast ally. One that was unwavering with intentions as pure and as sure as the fact the sun would rise and fall day in and day out.  "There are good hearts in this world. Those that are beaten down to never see the light of day. There are those that shine above the rest and act as a beacon--an example. You are much the latter," His smile is quaint now. His tail slowed. He welcomes the feeling of absolute contentedness to consume him. 

 "I'm going to do what so desperately needs to be done. The rest will fall into the place it was meant to be. Perhaps this is my stepping stone to be who I was intended to be," The only finality in this life was death and Collision's heart still beat beneath his bosom. His work was not finished, would not be left incomplete, and was only beginning to see the light of day. He knew that this meeting was drawing to an end--but she had been exactly where she needed to be. Her purpose serving as a reminder that he was on the right path. He hoped this would not be the last influence on his life she would have--but if that were so then it would be agreed it was the best possible thing that could have happened.

i'm leaving this open in case you want to get in one more reply but otherwise feel free to archive! & ty for this thread i absolutely love collision and the lovely way you write him<3

he smiles and the girl pours over the gesture with fervent joy, scintillating look not so much as attempting to hide the dance of bliss evoked by his newfound ability to pierce the melancholic cloak swamping him so. she is more of a tender being than she would be pleased to admit, empathy lingering within with an intensity that could be both considered a weakness and a strength. and so she realises that had his eyes failed to gutter within their heavy gloom by the time they came to depart, she would have pondered with fruitless unease over what could have been done differently for some time after. and although instinctively bashful at the bare honesty of his declaration, ears fluttering in the humming breeze, she is so very grateful to understand that he too has found that these shared moments have the potential to forge friendship, a criminally underrated concept. "i am glad you feel the same way" she hums, tail swishing across twirling blades.

and what he utters next will never be forgotten by the dove, rounded stare pressing close to his until the clamour of such overwhelming emotion tugs her look off to flutter upon the coruscating surface of frivolous water. a beacon? her? is it really true? has she not dabbled in the temptation of veiled shadow, spat fury at the world and her harsh allure? does she just feed what she wishes to be to any company she can grasp so that she feels worthy of dancing in the light? "i..." she blinks, shifting the burn of such ardent gazing upon him once more as a paw trails idly along the delicate grass tickling at her pads. "i hope you are right" it escapes just above a whisper, a shaken breath their only means of transport out into this world "i want to do good, that's all...bad things happen and well, i just really want to stop them from happening whenever i'm able to. i think some laugh at that, see it as some childish want to play hero but...well what is so childish about wanting to be a hero? if so many wolves see it fit to live their lives as villains then why is it sniggered at if someone wants to stand in their way? if you can want to thrive in darkness and perform such malicious deeds then i think that it only makes sense that some would want to thrive in the light and stop them whenever possible. i want wolves to be able to live out gentle lives and marvel at the beauty of this world without having to focus on the cruelty that lingers in every nook and cranny" she finally stares off again, muscle feathering in the side of her jaw. "i don't care if it sounds over dramatic or if it's cringy or whatever, i stand by it. i want to see a place where the bad guys have someone to fear"

a soft wisp of a laugh as she mumbles "i'm sorry there i go again, i had actually intended on just thanking you for saying that but...well listening to my head clearly isn't a strength of mine but...i think you're the latter too collision, in fact i know it and good luck, i have faith in you. you must come visit again sometime and perhaps one day i'll check out the kingdom and hopefully there will be a day in which you can find true peace there" and she would lean in to attempt an affectionate nudge to his shoulder should he allow it before offering a final dip of her head and slipping back towards her home, clement smile settled snug upon angular features and her heart warmer than it had been in some time.