Phoenix Maplewood so, what are you gonna do?

it’s early morning when vex steals out the borders of legion, knowing this, as it has every other time, cause him trouble. he can’t be bothered to care anymore. it’s mid-morning when he ‘rounds the jut of rocky ridge ‘round the bypass and veers off into the maplewood. ferns trampled and fronds broken beneath his paws as he pushes deeper and deeper, into it’s heart; heading west, narrowly avoiding the saps oozing out of the trunks of the maples; drawing in the sickly sweet scent, mixing as it does with the musk of herds passed and a slight tang that he thinks might be evergreen but doesn’t spend too much time debating with himself over.

he pauses to sniff at a crumbling log, deciphering the musk of moss and fresh rabbit trail. he ponders following it a bit before ultimately deciding to keep going. no doubt, the second someone realized they hadn’t seen him since early morning someone was sure to be on his ass to drag him back to the bypass.

or try to, at least.

Kigipigak has had enough of being home-bound. He has done nothing wrong; adding bodies to their number was a good plan regardless of why he had been doing it, and if Stjornuati could not see the value of that, that was a him problem. 

Since being forced to stick close to home Kigipigak had monitored the territory limits and kept the markings fresh. He'd kept an eye on the ravens and scouted out any places where they congregated, sometimes finding prey to hunt and sometimes finding bodies to bury. He'd avoided Valmua for the last few weeks. Altogether Kigipigak felt he had proven his willingness to keep his head down and work—and he deserved a little slack.

He'd climbed down from the cliffs in the early morning hours, watching as the sky lightened and then, by the afternoon, darken with thick bands of white cloud. A drizzle of cold half-frozen rain had started just as he was crossing through the meadow and so he sought out the cover of the forest. 

A thin frosting of snow had begun to layer across the trees; it was not yet cold enough to stick for long and it could not permeate beyond the reach of their branches, but Kigipigak would stay mindful of it all the same. Enjoying this taste of freedom (and the crisp quality to the cold air, so much like the winterhome he left behind) Kigipigak began to hike through the thin grove skirting the limits of the mighty forest—and that's when he picked up on a familiar scent.

He could not tell if it was Arktoi or her brother; he hoped at the very least, as he trailed after it, he did not come upon the ironheart that was their mother. The last thing Kigipigak sought was her wrath. Soon enough Kigipigak heard something moving within the woods and slowed down on his approach, finding that the trailing scent crossed a rabbit's trail, and grew more curious.

it takes vex a while to realize that, as he’s tracking the rabbit — not that he’s hungry; he figures if he gives a valid reason to sneak out contributing to the betterment of the pack might help curb his mother’s ire — he’s being tracked, in a manner of speaking. something gives the other’s presence away; perhaps a rustle of underbrush or the snap of a twig. in truth, vex isn’t interested in sussing out specifics; only zeroing in on the revelation as he turns and scans the green and brown landscape, albeit snowdusted as it is, and his gaze falls upon an ivory pelaged phantom. at first, with distance and hope that it’s haunt, he mistakes the other wolf as his sister.

hau—, her name cuts off with a low noise of annoyance as he realizes he’s subconsciously drifted closer and realized it was not, in fact, haunt. and not a stranger; at least, not a total stranger. he recognizes the face, at least. you’re …whatsyourname. snarks vex, not-so-cleverly trying to cover up the fact that he doesn’t know or remember. a tartok. that much, at least, he could recall.

he’d proven a dead end to the siblings when trying to navigate the bite of their mother’s wrath and continuously stubborn refusal to let them find kaertok. what’re you doin’ here? vex demands, feeling that the maplewood was plenty close enough to the bypass for him to act territorial.

Kigipigak heard something and paused. The sound came from an approaching figure, so he stood on guard in case it was Rokkvi on patrol (or someone, something worse). As they came closer Kigipigak recognized them. It wasn't Arktoi as he had initially suspected. This boy held the colors of autumn's aggregate across his coat. He was scowling—and finally Kigipigak saw the resemblance between the boy and his mother.

Kigipigak— The man clarified quickly. It was not quick enough. Vex shot back, What're you doin' here? Hah! As if his piss lined the forest's floor. Kigipigak was suprised to have found him so far from his mother and he wondered if she was chasing after him, intent on keeping him on a short leash. They could have bonded over a similar sort of circumstances had Kigipigak put in the effort.

I go where I please, which was a lie but hey, Kigipigak was getting better at that every day. Your mother know you're out here? He countered in the same breath, his sneer broad, although hardly malicious. The healthy ribbing of boys playing at being men.

kigipigak—, the man offers him to his slip of memory, suffice to say his 'uncle's' name was hardly something he'd been liable to remember in that whole messy exchange. mostly, he remembered the fight he put up, the snap about royal and being forward about the fact that he'd barely seen hide nor hair of her and really didn't give a rat's butt about her feelings and how, once again, arbiter got her way. how many times would haunt and him give into her before it started to make them look weak? like they couldn't hold their own in a battle of wits and words?

right, vex drawls with a quick nod at the name, trying to tuck it away though. this was their second meeting, after all, and surely more effort should be applied to remembering the name kigipigak. a low snort leaves vex at the other tartok's 'i go where i please' remark; mostly born out of jealousy as it was. what vex wouldn't give to be able to claim that, too. yeah, well maybe go where you please in territories not so close to legion, yeah? like usual — or at the very least thus far — vex was mostly all talk.

he had no real reason to and is reminded that kigipigak saw him being dragged back home by his mother so chasing him off would, understandably likely be met with laughter. there wasn't anything remotely threatening by a boy who was still tucked firmly ( however unwillingly ) beneath his mother's wing. vex rolls his eyes at the mention of his mother; biting remark after biting remark stinging at the tip of his tongue. regardless of what barb vex chose to use, it would no doubt clue kigipigak in on the truth: no. and if she was, no doubt she would come barreling in like a tank ready to fire soon.

if vex wasn't so annoyed that he was being treated like a two month old puppy he might've actually admired his mother and her ability to balance motherhood, two rebellious children and all her leadership duties all by herself.

maybe she does, maybe she doesn't. does it matter? vex asks.

The northern man is not the most astute creature, he does not read people as well as Valmua sometimes could or Stjornuati in the thick of things, but he knows his jabs are hitting their mark. When the boy finally reacts his tone is oddly level; there is a look on his face as if he's trying not to spit up his last meal. Concentration, irritation. Kigipigak had only meant it in light-hearted fun but even he could see the frustration in the boy as the egging continued. Better to grow a thick skin, he thinks.

One meeting with her was enough, Kigipigak commented. I do not intend to anger your issumatar beyond what poor feeling she may hold for me after last time. Nothing had come out of that initial introduction but family drama and awkwardness, which Kigipigak would prefer avoiding in the future. The last thing he wanted was to cause upset between a native pack and the ravenhome nearby.

Has she always had such an iron grip on you both? A wonder that your father could escape that at all. Again with the commentary, except this time Kigipigak doesn't realize how patronizing he sounded. It was not a judgement nor meant as an insult, but could easily be misinterpreted.

vex regards kigipigak as he speaks, and barely conceals the sneer that threatens to tug at the corners of his lips as he mistakenly assumes the older male's words for fear, true or not. the fact that it might be caution does not occur to him for he, himself, does not appear to have much in the way of caution. he's a boy playing at being a man, a prince playing at being king. a elaborate game or something he hoped to will into existence some day hardly mattered, he was sucked too far into it to stop any time soon.

perhaps not always, vex responds thinking of when they were young(er) and kaertok made them leave the den in search of their own. without their father to act as a buffer, arbiter appears to have wrapped her iron fist 'round her children. to royal, who is more phantom than sister these days — he couldn't even remember the last time he'd seen her and worse he couldn't find it in himself to be upset by it or truly care — who in her absence from everything and thus the trouble vex frequently found himself belly deep in was apparently the golden child. by default because she did nothing. nothing worth praise and nothing worth reprimand.

it seemed to be only after dad left. though perhaps it was because that was when vex, for he could not speak for haunt, had begun to break rules.

The sentiment held in the boy's voice was a conundrum to Kigipigak. He tried to find common ground as he heard that last statement. There was no reason to sympathize with this boy but he found himself trying. It was difficult because Kigipigak could not place himself in that situation. He was fatherless too, except that he was the cause of his current state, and he had been given his mother's blessing rather than a tightening of her will; she had loosened any control she had over her son and let him be free. Arbiter on the other hand was holding firm to her children as if they were a raft keeping her afloat.

My father is dead. Kigipigak announces. He was senile and was a weakness so my mother bade me to remove him. In saying this would he shock Vex? Would he hear another perspective on the matter? Kigipigak wondered. Your father left. Maybe he saw weakness in himself and thought to spare you of it. Maybe he feared being culled for that weakness. The ways of his village were not universal; Kigipigak would learn this eventually.

my father is dead,

it is quite the admission to start off with and for a moment vex studies kigipigak before the older male speaks again, unsure if he is meant to regard that as 'at least yours is alive' or 'these things happen'. vex is quiet as kigipigak goes on to explain that his father was senile and a weakness and that he was commanded by his mother to kill him. vex contemplates the options kigipigak lays out onto the table, regarding them like they are pieces on a wartable and he has been asked to survey it carefully.

for a moment, though vex dare not point it out, wonders if kaertok hadn't seen weakness in them and that was why he left. anything that might paint vex himself as weak is disregarded; arrogant as usual. i expect to get answers when i find him. he is owed that much at least, he feels. as for why kaertok left, vex can't even begin to fathom.

you may be kinkiller but at least you know why it had to be done. at least you have closure. the not knowing was what hurt vex the most about kaertok's departure. had he not returned because he didn't want them anymore? because they weren't worthy? because something happened to him? there were too many questions and not nearly enough answers.

There was a moment of quiet as Vex digested the statement. Kigipigak held no expectations; maybe the boy would find the tale riveting and delve in to questions, or maybe he would think it a joke and laugh in his face despite the grave tone he employed in the telling. What came was a sort-of acceptance that eased some of Kigipigak's concern. He had not realized how much worry he carried in speaking of this event — he had done it before, with Bijou at the beach. He had been proud of himself after-the-fact and praised by his mother. For some reason he could not fathom Kigipigak wanted approval from this boy — their similar situations being a likely catalyst.

The boy called him kinkiller and Kigipigak stifled a flinch. How could he be called such a thing when the killing of his father had earned him his name? Earned him, by his mother's law and the rights taught by his people, personhood, identity, in full? As soon as his father's throat was cut and he lay bleeding out upon the village grounds he lost his connection to Tartok — to Kigipigak, to all of it. That being the case, why did Kigipigak now think back on his actions and feel doubt creeping in?

Would you kill him? If given the order by your mother, for the goodness of your tribe? In all the stories of how the Tartok earned their names Kigipigak could not recall any involving the death of their parent; it was always a feat of strength or a great and terrible battle, yet he had gone the route of patricide and been rewarded for it. Could it have been wrong?

the question is then posed to vex: would he kill his father? if he was given the order? if it was for the goodness of his tribe? tribe? despite only wanting to leer at particulars, vex knew well enough what was meant and for the sake of the seriousness of this conversation bites his tongue against his worst impulses to taunt. he regards kigipigak coolly, contemplating it in earnest. would he raise teeth against kaertok if he was ordered to?

no.

vex knows it and is surprised by the ferocity with which the answer reverberates within him; as if it burst forth from the hellursine whose godly presence plagues near his every moment waking and otherwise.

and yet, vex cannot help but wonder if his refusal was stemmed in some loyalty to the man whom had sired him ...or if it was borne of his horrendously rebellious streak. for that, he has no answer.

no. vex finally answers, realizing for a sheepish moment that he has left kigipigak waiting while he worked out his own inner thoughts; shifting thru them carefully. for example, i think my sister, royal, is useless to legion and yet i wouldn't kill her. perhaps his feelings about royal were not the same thing but for vex it is close enough. he might've disliked her and considered her a freeloader but that didn't equate to murder in his mind.

The boy took his time and when he responded Kigipigak felt dismayed, at first. Disappointment struck at his heart. He was not sure if it was disappointment for the boy's lack of promise or for his own situation; he did not feel superior to Vex in any way for his own response to the question. When he had been asked it had not been a question but an order, one Kigipigak could not back away from, so he then began to wonder if Vex only answered negatively because he was not laden with parental pressure. It made Kigipigak begin to think about why he had accepted the order to purge Auktuk from their family.

As Vex went on to speak of a sibling and the potential of culling them from the pack, but not being invested in that either, Kigipigak nodded. He would never have torn in to his father without that order; he would never cull his sisters without one either, and none had been given. Their banishment had been enough. Auktuk could have been banished as well — the thought came to him sharply, ringing in his ears like tinnitus. I have sisters too, Kigipigak remarked - forcing himself to focus on the conversation and not the many thoughts coming to him now - and they were given the same order. They refused in the end. Banishment was their punishment. Perhaps it is a curse reserved for the young that have yet to prove themselves?

Kigipigak somehow doubted that Vex's mother would banish anyone. She seemed hard-hearted and firm in the upkeep of her laws. If anything were to happen she did not like Kigipigak would presume teeth and bloodshed would be her first response, not a verbal decree.

the revelation that kigipigak also had sisters wasn't very enlightening to vex, whom wasn't overly sure what he was meant to do with the information being given to him. apparently, his sisters were also told to kill their father. and their refusal meant it fell to you? vex poses at as a rhetorical question because kigipigak had already said as much. did you at least stop to consider why they refused? vex tries to imagine it: perhaps it was sentimentality, or maybe it was because it was a cruel order ( and that thought was coming from Class A buttmunch who frequently enjoyed being cruel ).

maybe it was easier for vex to ignore that which he thinks is useless because he had no power beyond what he pretended to have. or maybe he just didn't care. he rather had the thought of: you give what you take: give nothing and you can starve ...which only brings to light the consideration that his way might be the most cruel, prolonging death instead of taking the route of mercy.

i dunno. maybe dead weight is better dead.

Kigipigak had not thought about the event in much depth until this moment. With the aid of Vex's questions he could now think back and reflect on things, however he was stalwart in his convictions. It had to happen. It was a task given to all of us and I would not disobey my mother. My sisters agreed until the moment came to issue the challenge and then they were silent. It fell to me... But only because they were not there to back me up. And had they stayed the trio could have made quick work of the old man, rather than have him suffer through a fight for life or death; Kigipigak firmly believed that the culling would have been swift and painless had they worked together. He would never accept any alternative.

Maybe dead weight is better dead Vex went on to surmise. Kigipigak nodded. He did not have an opinion one way or the other about it, except where it related to the opinion of his mother. She had been his superior and as such, could issue no wrong order, and anything she desired was to be obeyed. It was a task that earned me my name and my freedom. I became a man that day, I was given the name of Tartok as is custom to my people - but it is not something that happens to one so young. I am the youngest in the history of my village to earn it. He puffed up a little at that admission, feeling quite proud of himself, and realized a moment later Kigipigak had been talking about himself in excess.

Your mother does not strike me as the kind of person to order a kill like that. Maybe do it herself if the need arose. She is formidable. Much like my own. Kigipigak hoped his comments were appropriate; he meant to compliment. In a way he made Arbiter sound like some sort of savage beast — and after one meeting it wasn't like he knew her well.

They had been talking for a while now, regardless, and Kigipigak chuffed. Do you fancy yourself a warrior? Is that the kind of family you hail from?

on the topic of blindly obeying an order given to him vex cannot relate. it brings to the forefront of his mind, a once fleeting thought he'd had of being mindless ...a tool to be wielded but never to think for itself. immediately, he rejects any notion of such. perhaps, would kaertok have not of pushed them to be more grown up than they were vex might've been similar to kigipigak: obeying arbiter without so much as a peep of question.

just because your superior is telling you to do something doesn't always make it right. it sounds like a wise statement but really it was just vex thinking about how they were always told not to venture beyond legion's borders and largely based off his own bias on the matter which always sided with his own beliefs and feelings. all he wanted to do was find his father. he understood it was dangerous — haunt's injuries because of it were evidence enough — and yet it still doesn't sit right with him. or maybe, vex considered, he was just born broken; unable to take orders from someone older and infinitely wiser than him, stuck in an endless and unbroken cycle of rebellion because he thought he was old enough.

kigipigak went on to explain it was how he earned the tartok name and that he was the youngest in his clan's history to do so and in the crowing of the achievement vex can finally draw a line of familiarity to the older male. vex tells himself as kigipigak basks in the glory of his own retelling that one day he, too, would bear the name tartok; and on the topic of his mother fulfilling the kill herself instead of issuing an order vex is silent. he offers a small shrug of his shoulders. he cannot rightly say what arbiter would or wouldn't do, not when they failed to see eye to eye on almost everything.

i never really thought about it, vex replies honestly, now. i'm good at tracking. but that tailored more to hunting, though he supposed it could be useful for warrior, too. hey, what do you know about uh, gods? it likely sounds totally out of the blue but to vex's minds eye he catches a glimpse of the hellursine sos lingering in the edges of his peripheral, a corporeal looking shadow lumbering among the trees; and it follows in line with vex's secret consideration to pursue a trade more spiritual in nature. like ...bear gods? vex had tried asking warlock, to no avail and now wonders whether sos is just a figment of his imagination or if there was something more concrete to him than that.

given that vex did not fancy himself much of an imagineer, he isn't liable to believe he created sos out of thin air.

The boy doesn't sound like he has a direction. That is something Kigipigak has only recently begun to experience himself; when part of the village he had a clear path to follow, and then with Stjornuati and the Watch he knew what must be done. Lately he had been feeling.. unmoored. Things were changing and he was not yet perceptive to exactly how.

Vex veers the convesation off a cliff in the next breath. Kigipigak blinks at him, then frowns, then begins to ponder what exactly he could be talking about. No. He said as he shook his head.

My people do not hold any such beliefs. You would be better off forgetting about it. But that sounded dismissive, didn't it? He thought of the tales he had grown up with. History lessons about Siku the First, battles for supremacy and territory, never citing any such nonsense. 

Kigipigak remembers something else though — There is one woman who might know such things. Beyond these mountains is a valley. The west edge has a mountain called Moonspear, and there a woman named Kukutux lives. She spoke to me of spirits and guides.

He licks his lips thoughtfully. If you can untether yourself from your mother long enough, perhaps make a journey there.

no.

vex's least favorite word in the world is uttered in response to his inquiry about gods; but the frown tugging the corners of the boy's lips down is due to the other matter entirely. he refuses to believe that he made sos up out of thin air; surely there was a connection somewhere whether in kaertok or arbiter's line. perhaps he wouldn't have questioned it so much if sos wasn't so very different than haunt's artemis but they couldn't be any more alike than night and day.

a noncommittal grunt is given at kigipigak's forth comment that he was better off forgetting about it. vex doesn't mention it but he doubts sos is going to untether himself from vex's mind ( imagination? ) anytime soon. the hellursine seems utterly content to stay and guide vex's decisions with a hefty paw.

and then, strangely enough, a small tidbit of information is dangled before him: a woman named kukutux from moonspear knew of spirits and guides. he tucks away her name and location for later use though he doubted arbiter would let him go see this woman. he hadn't ever mentioned sos to her and she wouldn't even let him try to find his own father; a stranger struck him as extra unlikely.

if he was to seek her out, it would have to be on the sly; though his running track record meant that he did nothing on the sly. i'll have to seek her out, someday. ...thanks kigipigak. the words are genuine and feel a bit strange as they slip from betwixt vex's lips. a moment passes, and then another. well, vex draws, surprised that no one had come to drag him back yet. no doubt, he figures, he's started pushing his luck. i should get going.

while it annoyed vex that he didn't even have to elaborate on that, he lets it pass. see you around, kigipigak. with that, vex continues on a bit before cutting his path sharply and looping back towards the bypass.