Moonspear he said, 'my boy you've got to run,'

arcturus did not want his mother’s rationalization, or her explanations. On second thought, he didn’t know what he wanted... maybe to feel as if this had never happened? or, to hear that maybe things were in the works, or that he had not been overlooked or forgotten..

because at the end of the day, no matter what was said or promised, arcturus realized none of it would make it better. none of it would reverse what had happened. he would still be second best — not that it bothered him; truth be told he could have always lived under the thumb of his brother, so long as he felt it was justified..

but in this case, he couldn’t understand it. revui had scarcely been back more than a month, after a long and unexplained absence.. but arcturus had always been here for his family, and to see that his family rewarded that by disregarding him.. of course it stung. 

his mother’s words challenged his irrationality, laying bare that there was still yet much for revui to prove. it did not slake arcturus’ injured sense of self. of course i am bothered. arcturus retorted, feeling he had already lost in some way and that no matter what he said, he had little hope of showing his mother his perspective. 

why wasn’t i good enough? he had a thousand things to say — how he had stayed even when hydra and revui both had disappeared; how he had never strayed once from the mountain or caused his family upset; how he had done everything in his power to be a good brother, a good son, a good packmate — but the power to elucidate his view point faded from him out of pure frustration. instead of eloquence, arcturus suddenly was seized by silence. no matter what he said, he would not win. 

so why even bother?