Moonspear to wait for my father, to gather up his tools

following the events of charon’s long anticipated return to moonspear, and whatever vague conclusion happened thereafter, arcturus sought out @Speedy.

once they had been playmates, and the boy had developed a crush on her. yet ever since the event where hydra and charon had nearly come to blows over speedy’s account, arcturus thought differently of her. he had seen the way revui had crowded her, the way charon had tucked her to his side like a prized piece of meat — and even then, arcturus did not suspect his father.

he suspected speedy.

hydra’s words echoed in his mind as the boy searched for the woman. cagey and wanting answers, arcturus sped up as he detected her scent, which thankfully no longer held that stupid heat to it.

After parting with Hydra, she headed back to her den, desperate for some time to herself away from the condemnation of the pack. She deserved it, more than they knew, but it didn't make it feel any better. She was a mess, honestly, and she wasn't sure how she would be able to function living with so much guilt and regret. But, she had to figure out, and if she was good at anything, it was preserving. She had never done so in the face of such a heavy situation, but what choice did she have now?

She padded quickly and quietly through the forest at the base of the mountain, too focused on making it to her den to notice the shadow at first. But when she did finally see him, she froze, ears falling as wary eyes flicked between him and the ground. Quietly, she waited for him to approach, assuming he was here to dole out his own punishment.

things had changed between them; gone was the playful glint in both of their eyes, the carefree expressions. arcturus was solemn as he descended towards her, noticing the way she seemed to anticipate him -- with what, fear? pain?

he did not come here to cause her pain.

he did not like the way she looked at him, guilty; as if a dog about to be struck. he loosened a tired sigh, wishing she had never had her heat in the first place. if she had just kept a lid on it, none of this would have happened. the family wouldn't be at each other's throats, and he wouldn't be here, about to ask speedy the toughest question he had ever thought of.

"did you do anything with my father?" arcturus' tone was steely, and he kept his head high -- a sliver of charon seemed to be apparent then, as he stared down at the woman he believed responsible for this all. how she answered would pave the course of events to follow, and arcturus dearly hoped she answered truthfully.

God, she wanted so badly to tell him the truth; the words formed in her throat pushing her to speak them. This secret was already killing her; she hated having to lie to all of her packmates, but she had promised Charon that she would, so she swallowed the painful lump of words, and shook her head. Nothing happened, she lied again. It was for the best...at least that's how she was trying to rationalize it. If she kept this a secret, then things could calm down and go back to normal; she could live with the guilt--she deserved to live with it. 

And, if she was with child, well, she'd figure something out then. For now, she just wanted to put out all the fires she had started if that was even possible.

arcturus' posture was rigid as he stared down speedy. his yellow gaze a cold squint. he did not realize he was holding his breath until speedy answered, informing him nothing had happened in an expression that made it abundantly clear her words were true.

unfortunately for arcturus, and possibly fortunately for speedy, the boy had not lived long enough to detect a lie when it was presented smoothly. satisfied with her answer, arcturus issued a long exhale and a stern cant of his head. "that's all i needed to know." he informed the woman with a flick of his tail.

thus armed with the knowledge that he secretly wanted to hear (and so invested in only hearing what he wanted to hear..), arcturus did not catch any deceit in her words or posture, and stalked off at a leisurely stroll, leaving speedy to live with her lies alone.

Guilt, stifling and heavy, filled her chest at the ease at which he accepted her lie. It made her want to stop him and tell him the truth, but she wouldn't; she promised Charon that she would keep this secret for as long as possible, and that's what she was going to do.

So, she didn't call out to him. Instead, she watched him leave, and then turned and headed to her den, praying she could make it there without running into anyone else.