Hideaway Strath my name means meadow but i'm no flower

@Kynareth Deagon @Sasha Deagon
Forward dated a few days after this thread.

So far so good.

It had been a few says since Aya was killed. And after a heated confrontation with Kynareth, the woman did everything she could to avoid the wolf. No talking, no touching. Not even a glance. Leigh had managed to accomplish her goal of giving her alpha the silent treatment, but she knew he'd sneak his way into her life eventually.

For now the she-wolf sat alone. Although she remained within the pack's new home territory, she wandered a bit further from the others. Every single one of them were completely disappointing, even those who hadn't participated in the kill. The fact that they did nothing was the very thing that angered Leigh to no end. They did nothing to stop the murder.

Isolated, the she-wolf took a seat in a secluded area to rest. Hopefully no one would find her here. And if they did, she'd simply ignore their presence.

He knows Leigh is intentionally being elusive. Especially after their nice little public execution. Which Kynareth quite enjoyed actually, but it’s not a thing for everyone obviously. Especially Leigh and even though he feels bad, it is necessary to get her used to the bloodshed of this cruel, cruel world. Innocence never lasts anyway and the violence will never cease. It’s just how the world is, malice ingrained into them as beings. They didn’t have elongated, sharp teeth and the natural instinct to kill for nothing. Kynareth is just more in tune with his instincts than most and he wonders what went wrong in the brains of the wolves who were not the way he is. Perhaps some divine intervention? Who knows. 

Yet, today he decides to seek out the stubborn girl. He will not apologize for the show because it was necessary, but he will try to mend their relationship as much as he’s able. So he puts his sniffer to the ground and doesn’t stop until he catches a scent trail. Which he then follows to a rather secluded area of their new territory. 

When finally his golden orbs lay upon the dark pelted female he finally lifts his head. His steps are not quiet, for he doesn’t want to scare her, but he does approach in a calm manner. Head relaxed and level with his shoulders as he comes to stand a couple meters away from her. 

If she has not noticed his presence now, she is either ignoring him or merely distracted by thought. Either way, he breaks the silence between them. 

“Leigh.” Comes his even voice. “I’ve come to talk. I’m sure you don’t want to, but we must eventually.”

she stuck close to her Grandmaster now.
her days spent, stuck still in putrid darkness with that...medic. witch.
she didn't want to be targeted again.
plus, it gave her an excuse to have her husband catch her every time she decided she should feel a bit too light-headed to stand upright.
it only worked once or twice and he was catching on. so, for now, she followed obediently. silently.

she didn't know who they were seeking now.
perhaps that Nyra.
she halfheartedly sniffed the trail he followed. well, it was a female.
was she one of the bitches he said to be fuckin'?

at last, he stopped and spoke. she let her head hang low while scanning for a place to rest.
she forgot he was always moving around his lands.
she sighed softly, not even hearing the words exchanged between the two.
finally, she mooched off to the side and plopped herself down, only now taking care to assess the situation at hand with a far too regal air about her now.

She could hear the footsteps as they approached, and she knew exactly who they belonged to.

Releasing a sigh that sounded somewhat irritated, she allowed Kynareth to inch closer, though she did not look his way. Turning her head to avoid eye contact, the woman made it very clear that she was ignoring her alpha. Only her ears tilted back towards the other wolf, waiting to pick up any sound or voice. But besides that, she turned away, refusing to give any indication of forgiveness.

Leigh scoffed at his words. She didn't want to hear any more excuses. No matter what Kyn said, no matter what his reasons were, the she-wolf threw his reasoning aside.

It hadn't been necessary at all. To kill an innocent wolf? There was no good reason for doing so. Not to her. Kynareth only made those actions necessary because he wanted to cause pain. But they didn't need to happen.

"No, we don't."

Her voice finally cut the silence after a few moments had passed since the other wolf spoke.

"I can communicate just fine without words. It's your own fault if you're too braindead to understand anything that doesn't involve talking or fucking."

Kynareth sighs as she turn even further away from him. His face is unamused, but not too obviously rude. Why does everyone have to be to sensitive? He wants to pull his fucking hair out and chew off his ears because of how easily wolves get so emotionally hurt around these parts. Or maybe Kynareth’s the weird one and he’s just insensitive about literally everything because his father taught him how to not be a pussy. Either way, he does value Leigh and doesn’t want to see her leave, but at the same time he knows that she must allow this experience to make her stronger. 

So he stands there, motionless as he stares holes through the back of her head. “Then do it.” He challenges, referencing her comment about communicating without words. He almost wants her to snap at him. Actually he does want her to snap at him. He wants her to try and fight him if she can so called communicate just as well without words.

braindead huh.
sasha looked to Kynareth. he wouldn't snap at this thing. no, he was here to make amends or some shit. she spoke about how she could communicate without words. oh, this would be fun. Kynareth had two modes of that.
fightin' and fuckin'.

she half wondered if she were going to be stuck present for their little game, however it turns out.
or if she had the strength to drag herself away.
she hummed softly, a smile playing on her lips.

he challenged the sprite. dared her to even. her head tilted slightly. blinking slowly.
she almost begged for them to put on a show of some sort. whether it be fightin' or...well, the other option. she liked to watch sometimes.
perhaps if she weren't so hard up she would be joining in. playing out the possibilities of how that could go in her head.

She was too frustrarted to even notice Sasha.

Kynareth's reply had been short and to the point. The woman had been around the tiger-wolf long enough to pick up on his speech patterns and manmerisms. Usually, during a real conversation, regardless of the mood, he'd comment something snarky or tease her. His sentences were usually longer and filled with more personality. But this, his "then do it" was none of those things. To Leigh it sounded dull and empty. It sounded like a challenge.

The she-wolf would have loved to rip Kynareth apart right there and then. But most of all she wanted to see him suffer. And she knew ignoring him for the past few days had worked so far. Giving into the temptation and participating in a physical fight would only please the alpha. She'd only turn into the very thing that killed Aya. The very thing she promised to a special someone a long time ago that she'd leave behind.

In some ways, she had already given him what he wanted. He wanted non-verbal communication and ignoring him was just that. But Leigh knew it was far too complicated for the wolf to understand. At least she thought so.

For now the woman would sacrafice the silent treatment for something she'd been meaning to say ever since the execution. The she-wolf was terrible at coming up with ideas in the moment, but she'd had some time now and her mind was running wild with insulting comments.

"You think I'm weak," she began, swinging her head to finally face Kyn. Her eyes had since dulled with sadness and narrowed with spite.

"You look at me like I'm pathetic. And yet you're the one who has rid himself of all emotion except hate and lust. I allow myself to cry. To love. To care and to feel sorrow. As awful as emotions are, I welcome them with open arms because I'm not afraid of what I may feel."

Now she'd take him up on his challenge.

Rising to her paws, she trotted over until she was face-to-face with a wolf she once considered a friend. Although far smaller, she tilted her head until her eyes yet his, leaning in close as rage spilled from her lips.

"I am plenty strong enough to handle the tidal wave of suffering. Clearly you aren't."

So correct me if I’m wrong but I think Leigh told Don a bit about her past. If not then I will edit lol I just can’t quite remember.

Kynareth frowns when she turns to him and begins this interesting speech of hers. Eyes never leaving her own he looks upon her expectantly.

You think I’m weak.

Actually, no he doesn’t. He couldn’t disagree with her more. Rather he thinks the opposite of the dark pelaged she-wolf. He doesn’t interrupt her though, he takes the brunt of her insults like a man is supposed to. He doesn’t dare talk back yet.

When she’s finished though, his frown slowly tilts up into a confident smile. “I don’t think you’re weak, Leigh.” He comments casually as if everything she said was incredulous. “Sure maybe I’m not as outwardly emotional, but I still have fucking feelings.” Now he branches back onto the subject of matter he knows will piss her off — the public execution. “I give you all that test so see what each and every one of you will do in certain situations. I learned something from all of you.” He chirps matter-of-factly. “I don’t blame you for your reaction, but you need to get used to death. This world is cruel and it’s either you or them. As I’m sure you’ve already experienced.” He hums referencing her past.

her words were spun from her mouth like the weaver does with her stolen hair.
such strong words that rang so true. oh this girl felt more emotions than her husband certainly did.
but then. that last little insult.
Sasha scoffed, trying to stifle a laugh. strong enough to handle the suffering? Sasha erupted into laughter, all while trying to hide her muzzle and stop. oh she was such a hypocrite! she'd wailed and cried, begged and screamed for some stranger, pitiful girls life and she thinks she can stand suffering.

Sasha looked away, trying desperately to stop her childish giggles. she knew if she looked at Leigh again she'd tart raucously again. best pretend she didn't exist for a few moments.
Kynareth kept his calm words sprouting like some therapist. he really had changed. or maybe he was just simping.

For a moment she listens. At first she silently stands before Kynareth, eyes still pinned to his as he speaks. When he first begins his reply she doesn't have much to criticize. However, it is only until he mutters the words "you need to get used to death" does she suddenly have a problem with the conversation.

It isn't long after until the woman's ears shift direction, catching the sound of irritating laughter. It seems someone had followed Kyn. Great.

Leigh for a moment is tempted to find the source of the interuption and kill the owner of such giggles without hesitation. But there is no time for that. She'll deal with whoever the culprit is later. Right now, this is between her and the tiger-wolf.

Just because you're used to death doesn't mean you have to like it. It doesn't mean you can't care.

The she-wolf was usually quiet. Just a plain, ordinary face sitting in the background while other wolves talked. While meetings were held or interesting conversations occured. But that didn't necessarily mean she had nothing to say. The majority of her speech was kept quiet, kept within her own mind. But now she no longer gave a fuck about her pack's feelings. She'd rip their little emotions to shreads and all she'd have to do is talk.

"You say you don't blame me for my reaction. And yet you come to me, criticising and mocking my feelings all under the disguise of an apologetic meeting."

She then takes a step back. Just being around Kynareth was punishment enough.

"I'm great friends with death. I'm used to the concept of death and have been for many years. But unlike you, I don't surrender to the suffering and give into violent temptations as a way to distract myself from the terrors of life. I don't become the very thing I hate because I'm too weak to do otherwise. And I definitely don't use my parents and upbringing as a fucking excuse for my behavior, no matter how great or awful it was."

And then Leigh switches. It's her turn to ask Kynareth the hard questions now. It's her turn to twist his feelings and get a fucking reaction.

"As for it's either you or them, what about me? If we were being chased down by a rabid pack of wolves would you leave me behind to save yourself? Would you run away as you heard my screams and the sounds of my flesh being torn from my body? Would you return to see if I somehow survived only to arrive at the sight of my lifeless corpse rotting and being consumed by the earth? All knowing you could have saved us both if you could only get past such a corrupted way of thinking?"

She dared him to answer.

Would you, Kynareth Deagon?

He wants to sigh and shake his head, typical reaction. Though he doesn’t think Sasha’s laughing helps at all he still can’t find himself to agree with Leigh. He is a very open minded man believe it or not, but he is also aware of his own beliefs and will not be changing them any time soon. Things are very black and white for him and when things tend to look grey is when shit gets complicated. Leigh is grey. Her mind is complicated and she thinks too much about it. While Kynareth keeps shit simple. No room for overthinking, no room for shit to start looking grey. Death is death, life is life. Wolves are cruel and that will never change. So why fight it? 

So he decides not to stay silent too much longer. After waiting out all she has to say he starts off with a shake of his head. “I did not come here to mock your feelings, Leigh. Like I said, I don’t blame your for your reaction. I don’t ask you to change if you don’t want to, I only ask that you get used to it. Especially if you are to remain here with the Saints.”

“You overcomplicate things. I was taught this way and I stuck with it, unlike you. I’m not sure if you know, but I’m aware that the things I do are bad.” He pauses dramatically, eyes never leaving Leigh’s own. “But I’m free to do as I want, just as you are. I’m free with my way of thinking. The world is a savage place and you have to meet it head on or get fucking knocked down. So you say you’re strong? Then fucking prove it. ‘Cause I believe you, but I have yet to see it.” It’s a bluff, he’s seen how strong willed this woman is. “As for leaving you to get eaten by a pack of wolves? No, I wouldn’t do that. Believe it or not, I give a fuck about my pack and even those who aren’t in my pack. There are people I’m willing to die for. Those who make it on that list are very few and far between.”

He paces a few steps away. “Leigh I’m a piece of shit to the highest extent. I’m a monster, but you haven’t seen the half of it.” He hums ominously. He looks to Sasha so that she can second this information before looking back to Leigh. “I’ve killed innocents — mothers, fathers, daughters, sons. I’ve ordered my men to plunder, raid, and kill entire packs.” Another pause and his face goes from fairly soft and replacing it with a harder, firmer expression. “And I never even batted an eye at it. The only reason I am so tame here is because I understand when the game has to be played in order to not be slaughtered in cold blood.” He laughs, a bitter, malicious sound with a smile to match. “It’s a dog eat dog world out here, Leigh. You’re either the aggressor or you’re dead. All these packs who live with their head in the clouds and ignore the horrible shit that happens in this world are oblivious and naive. They wouldn’t know real war and terror unless they got hit with it head on and if I had the numbers, I would show them.” He ends venomously.

He stops then, he knows this is not a means to a good ending but he can’t stand the wolves who keep their head in the clouds. There’s no room for that shit here. Even though he says these things, he is instantly regretting saying it. Knowing that his and Leigh’s relationship is now in shambles, his face softens and he sighs. Waits for the storm that is this dark pelaged she wolf before him to verbally or maybe even physically rip into him once more.

at last, whilst the pair were rattling off their long, truly heartfelt speeches to each other, Sasha managed to contain herself again.
watching again. listening to the tail end of their words. ah, the packs they watched suffer at the hands of his followers.

"it was fun though, don't you admit, love?" she'd risen and drifted to the side of her brindle counterpart. mismatched eyes now fixated on the little dragon.
"i remember one pack that lived by some sand coated lands where they all chose to die. even the little ones trying to fight too. that wasn't his order, of course," she gestured to Kynareth, "but it was needed at the time. we weren't about to harbour the strays now, were we?" a wickedly simple smile crossed her face as she pulled away from Kynareth. the two were so different. where he had sympathy, she raged. where he had emotions, she lacked.

"i remember this one wolf with these dazzling blue eyes and such a dark, sooty coat. protecting his matching little girl from our hunters. from me." a pause, to see how deeply she was taking the tale of this butchering, "that little girl had the sweetest blood, y'know."

a soft breath passed her lips that had enough emotion in it to be called a 'huff of a laugh'.

Leigh was done listening to all of this.

The woman was polite enough to allow Kynareth to finish his little speech. Regardless of how much she disagreed, she listened intently and absorbed his words. He had a compelling case, but it still wasn't enough to be convincing. It all still sounded like nonsense. It was nonsense.

But after the wolf's words came to an end, the she-wolf swiftly turned to leave. Even as the unfamiliar and feminine voice spoke up, Leigh paid it no attention. Turning towards the other direction she was just about to trot away, leaving the two murderers behind.

She only made it a few steps before coming to a sudden halt.

...What....did you just say...?

It hit her like a boulder. It couldn't possibly be true. It couldn't have been her family.

And yet it was.

Although she didn't turn to face the two, her attention had shifted back to the pair once more. Ears tilting backwards, eyes still focused ahead. Her mind was now in a different place, a dimension separated from the world.

How would she react to such news? How could she react? It was as if the universe plotted the whole thing against her. As if the whole thing was one big joke. She came to this new world in search of starting a fresh life, only to bump into the wolf who's pack killed her own.

And at some point, she loved that wolf.

They weren't friends. That was just a cover. A cover to ignore the guilt she'd be consumed by for having feelings towards someone other than her beloved.

The execution of Aya had pushed the woman to the edge of breaking. But now this too?

Donovan had been nothing but kind. A flirt yes, but so was her husband. In many ways they were similar, perhaps that was why Leigh was so eager to say "yes" to the invitation of joining the Saints. Perhaps it wasn't for survival. Perhaps it was only so she may cure the pain of loneliness. Perhaps something a bit familiar would be a comfort to her.

Had all of this been false? Had she only projected the feelings she had for her husband onto the first wolf she met? One who only slightly resembled the love who she'd lost?

Another cruel joke.

Because Donovan had died too.

The wolf she had been speaking to ever since Aya's death was Kynareth Deagon. He may have looked like Donovan, but he was not Donovan.

Donovan was a sweet, playful, and somewhat irritating wolf. He was hard to understand sometimes, but his heart was good.

But the tiger-wolf that stood behind her was nothing but murderous and mean. Kynareth had been the husband of Sasha. And although Leigh still hadn't caught the golden woman's name, she could sense their relationship. It was beyond obvious. And Leigh knew it was a match made in whatever hell they came from.

And yet she wouldn't snap. Even after everything that had happened, the dark-furred female remained as calm as possible, at least she appeared to be as calm as possible.

Grinding her teeth, her own fangs punctured her tongue out of frustration. She was re-directing her anger onto herself because she feared giving into what the pair of monsters wanted her to become. The taste of metal dripped down her throat, but she simply ignored it.

And then finally, she'd speak.

"Have a nice day.."

Trailing off, Leigh stood in place for a moment, the air silent for only a second before the woman's paws softly grazed the ground as she walked.

I know what you want. I know you want your death to be a show. You want to be drowning in pain, screaming dramatically and to make your presence known. You want me to snap, to break, to go mad.

Leigh only gave them one last look of acknowledgement. Swinging her head around, she cast them one last fiery glance.

So eat this, bitch.

No matter what he says, he is capable of having feelings and caring for those who have shown him the same back. So, why does he still care for Sasha? The back stabbing bitch who killed his pack? Yes, he keeps reminding himself that he’s going to make her suffer, but the worst part is that there is still a part inside of him that wants her to stay. Maybe they could have some pups for real this time, but then he reminds himself that if she fooled him once she could fool him again. 

But Leigh — Leigh is an understanding, sweet, but firm individual. She’s genuine, unlike Sasha. Still, the way Sasha chirps out the horrid information to the dark pelaged wolf has Donovan mentally cringing. Especially as he realizes what Sasha is getting at. Did they kill Leigh’s old pack in one of his raids? All the evidence presented to them is saying that they did and Sasha is to blame for her husband and kid specifically. Though it started with his order to kill any who oppose them. He is not sensitive to the others who died, he doesn’t care for them, but he does care for Leigh. 

For now though, he stands there and watches her give them a death glare from hell accompanied by a curt but cutting Have a nice day. She’s gone. He’s going to apologize to her later tonight and make it up. Or try to, when Sasha isn’t on his heels. 

He looks to Sasha then, a sigh and he begins walking the opposite direction of Leigh. A nod of his head signaling for Sasha to follow. He will apologize to her later tonight. He continues to say to himself — Sasha, Leigh.

she stopped.
it seemed her moderately emotional recount touched her. grasped her little heart and squeezed it tight.
Sasha smirked but was, ultimately, sorely disappointed.
she didn't explode or swear, didn't turn with a snarl.
just quiet, cold, anger.
boring.

she flicked her eyes to Kynareth, who had suddenly slinked off.
oh, there was his tail bobbing away. she quickly trotted after him with a wince of pain.
why wasn't he enjoying this?
her brows furrowed and came to the realisation.

Leigh was a problem.