Lion Head Mesa tenax

I am not certain… that I know what you are, Germanicus, the darkling said to him quietly.

Perhaps he had built the man up to be more than he was. Perhaps, he had thought the silver knight was something from fabled stories. He was a man who was honorable and kind, who fulfilled his purpose with stoic dutifulness. Crowfeather did not imagine there was a better man alive, but it was only in that moment – upon the ground with the silver figure of the older man pressed to his back – that he realized he may have allowed his feelings to sway his opinion.

Crowfeather could never be a wife to him. He could never give him children. There would never come a time when there would be a stern-faced young pup with dark fur and dandelion flower eyes. The understanding in that gripped his heart.

You would… you would be a good father, his voice was barely above a whisper. The light of his eyes had fallen to the ground. Suddenly, the closeness of Germanicus felt wrong. It felt like a poor consolation for being told that he would eventually mate with Ruenna, and they would build a life together. It felt cruel.

Crowfeather stirred himself and pushed away from the frame of the man.

I will be truthful first, then.

The light of his eyes remained fixed on the ground.

I do not believe- I do not think you are only a mentor, Germanicus. Not to me.

When he tried to lift his eyes to the man’s face, he found he could not. The weight of the admission suffocated him.

I feel- more. I feel more for you than I think I should.

The lump in Crowfeather’s throat was immense.

I understand it is not right. That you will not be able to have a life with someone… with me. I do not need you to drag me along if I am only a burden. Lady Ruenna would bring honor to you and your family. She would be able to make you a father…

She would be all the things I could never be.