Firefly Glen [PHE] Soul's Seek Truth

ajei shared what she knew and for a moment it was as if sobeille had taken residence inside her beautiful eyes, and was now looking at the world in new perspective.

she mulled over the different packs and their names. intrigued by the mention of a scarred man, and also wanting to learn more about bearclaw, sobeille settled on the pack that ajei specifically isolated: la muerte.

what do de la muerte wolves do specifically? slink, but for why? sobeille sat up a little straighter, trying to figure out which camp in the distance housed these furtive wolves.

Ajei shook her head unsure. She didn't understand the eays of La Muerte it was as if they did not like the sun.

They seem to dislike the sun. It is peculiar? Who doesn't like the sun?

She frowned in thought. They remind me of the little animals that sleep in cavea amd beneath the ground.

sobeille took in this bizarre information.

what kind of wolf shirked from the sun?

wolves - in her estimation - were proud, cursorial creatures. bred to run and range and roam and kill -- it made no sense to be afraid of anything when they were the things to be afraid of.

are dey disfigured? sobeille had seen things that grew in the dark before. mushrooms, plants, small order of insect, mammal, amphibian, or fish. small things, pale things, unhealthy as if by forfeiting the sun's touch they lost all sense of vigor.

why don' we take a walk dat way, sobeille motioned, surveying the various camps as she memorized who was where -- most specifically, that of swiftcurrent.

Ajei didn't know what to make of the wolves of the muerte clan. Even their name sounded a bit forbidden, but what it meant she had no idea. But it gave her a chill none the less. 

I don't believe so. They are quite pretty actually. They just seem to dislike the sun. Perhaps they live a life of nocturnal.

She nodded. Okay we can walk that way. I can show you the different packs. Some have sweet members.

nocturnal wolves did not sound too strange to sobeille. she walked at a leisurely pace, motioning for ajei to fall in step behind her.

slyly, she studied the way the light gleamed off ajei’s pelt. like sunlight off the glintwater surface of the sea. beautiful — but not hers to hold.

the thought filled her with inimitable sadness.

sweet? sobeille teased, turning to look at one encampment enshrouded by trees. what makes dem sweet? she probed, hiding the welt of jealousy she felt: did ajei have a crush on someone? who?

Ajei knew that some preferred night time to day time and some wolves it was a matter of survival, but she herself. She liked the sun on her fur. The sky. She preferred her sleep time for darkness. 

Ajei was oblivious to the attention as she almost always was. Because she very seldom looked anyway in their face. Preferring to keep her own face and mind turned away. Not because she did not care so deeply for those in her inner circle. But because she was so painfully, abhorrently anxious and shy. 

Ajei chuckled softly. Her laughter light and airy like her delicate steps. Well there are wolves, brothers from Kvarsheim they are kind, and there are girls in Bearclaw. They are also nice. And of course the crop of children from the Spear are such sweet little beans.

how was ajei so wholesome? so kind? sobeille examined the makings of her face in awe, wondering what fates had instilled in ajei a concoction of sweetness in which she, sobeille, was entirely without.

tell me about dem? sobeille implored, now looking at the Kvarsheim camp. she did not care to know each of these boys, or the girls — or anyone — but to hear the gentle flow of ajei’s voice just a little longer.

Ajei had only known love. There had never been any less acceptance for her ever by anyone in moonglow or even the spear. She was never treated unkindly by her siblings or her parents. Well her father had left early on. But she hardly remembered him so it did not matter. Especially since her mother made up for her father's loss with her own true love. 

Hmm. Well the brothers seem very kind and acccepting of all. The one brother Ujurak he sought out Alaric one day in the healing circle to learn. There was a spar between Sven and Cygnet I hear. But i did not see it. That was just a small little rumor I heard while in moonglow camp.

She thought about what else she was going to say.  The children from the spear are impish and curious. They often look for food and pretty things. They have been running back and forth.

Ajei tapped her paw. I must admit i Don't know much about the bearclaw wolves. I have only spoke with them in passing. Small greetings. But they were kind. A little shy perhaps or unsure.

ajei had only ever known love in its purest form. she was to love what nectar was to a flower; the distilled and potent extractant that sweetened all with its honeyed profile.

but sobeille had known love too. devotion and unmitigated tenderness had been her steadfast concordat. rather than ambrosia, in sobeille such love amassed to a single fruiting body; a mushroom of rot and dereliction that could only be accounted for by being the product of a malformed egg.

her gaze travelled the various camps as ajei spoke of their occupants. she was most interested in kvarsheim; bearclaw housed ameline, and swiftcurrent was full of dicks.

de brothers of kvarsheim, are dey our age? what do dey look like?

Ajei did not know that her friend felt so poorly of herself. Or she would have surely spoke out and up. After all, Sobeille was nothing but kind to her. They had a rocky start it was true, but Sobeille treated her with kindness where kindness was due. She just saw the world in more abstracts of Black and white versus grey.

A wrinkle of her nose in thought. They are both grey scale, light eyes. One is darker than the other. Bigger than me, smaller than a large wolf. Stocky and broad.

Ajei wasn't sure if they were near their age they seemed to be. She had admittedly only seen them in passing. I think they are near are age, perhaps a little younger, but not by much.

sobeille would have to pass this along to chani; though the two had yet to have a deep discussion of their spring plans, sobeille had only ever set her sights ahead.

two boys, hale and in their age group. sobeille thought of a different young male, a flicker of malcontent burning low in her chest.

where arrluk be? she asked suddenly, restraining any emotion from settling on her strangely lax face.

Ajei had not thought ahead to spring yet. She was a wolf that lived moment to moment. Which was strange given her proclivity towards anxiousness. But her mother's death had taught her. Every moment counts, if nothing else.

She gave a small shrug. I am unsure. He helped me bring things to trade and then I believe he joined the hunters. I stayed near the women's circle and healing places.

it took great restraint for sobeille to disguise the ugliness sobeille felt towards arrluk from showing upon her face.

she counted encampments. thought of the gulls as they barked on the shore. remembered the low bellow of a caribou as steam poured out from its widened mouth.

thought of anything but that ugly emotion; and at last, the moment passed. sobeille began to study ajei's face discreetly.

ajei was very pretty. sobeille wished to make her a totem upon her mantle; something to hold and to move about and to own outright.

but she knew you didn't own something unless you swallowed it.

is 'e a good 'unter, den? an innocent question as sobeille began to sharpen her practiced blade.

As per usual Ajei was oblivious to her friends dislike of Arrluk. She figured Sobeille liked him well enough, because he had never done anything to offend her. As far as she knew.

Ajei frowned in thought. Had she ever actually seen Arrluk hunt a lot. She didn't think so. Fish yes. And he did well at it, but so did she and Sobeille. But that didn't diminish his skill.

She dipped her head. He and I have not hunted often. The few times we have. I don't much like hunting. He did well yes. But he is a very good fisherman.

a good fisherman! sobeille nearly laughed. it was she that was the fishwife angling for fish.

ajei did not know.

she studied the kvarsheim camp longer. grey steppes crawling out towards a waning light. thin alpine trees shouldered in shadow.

fishermen or caribou killer it did not matter. sobeille would not share her quarry. when your season come, will you go to him?

her yellowglass eyes slid back to ajei, darkness pooling at the pupils to think of arrluk moving within her.

Ajei blinked surprised at the turn of conversation. She froze misstep. Truthfully she had not thought on it. Her season would come or it would not. She did not know. This was not a conversation her mother had a chance to have with her. Oh she knew the basics and Kukutux had been kind enough to fill in the gaps and give her knowledge. 

But she did not know nor did she feel wholly comfortable answering when she didn't know.

I truly have not thought of it Sobeille. It is not something that I have extensive thoughts on. This year has been me learning to get through life without my mother. Learning new stories and new ways. Grieving in quiet moments and exploring joy. So I cannot answer that today.

the shift in conversation had been no more subtle than a hurtling brick — and not surprisingly it caught ajei off guard.

sobeille could sense the unease; the shift of her eyes as she looked to her and then away. somewhere an uncomfortable nerve being pressed beyond visibility.

she withdrew abruptly. was just a question. her voice sullen as she scrambled for a way to soothe the sudden bumpiness she felt splintering between them. me an’ chani probably goin’ to travel den. mebbe we see you. a brief moment of vulnerability exclipsing the sudden jolt of anger she felt brewing within her.

Ajei didn't necessarily mind the shift in conversation. It was simply. One she was not used too, had not thought about. She hadn't even thought if she wanted to be a mother? Would she even be a good one? She didn't know if she would. She could barely hunt. She was hurt by words and actions and sometimes it was rather silly. A perfect example was this very day. She had been hurt by someone's words and though she still felt she was in the right. She had a nagging sensation that perhaps she should have stayed and reasoned with the two ill tempered girls of Swift Current. Perhaps she could have explained she was not being rude. But she didn't think that one would have accepted her words actually. 

It's fine. It is just not a question I have thought about. I suppose I will wait and see.

Ajei smiled then and nodded. Of course I will look forward to seeing you.

a disconnect grew between them. was it sobeille imagining it, or did it truly exist?

why did she put people on edge? what was wrong with her?

she stiffly passed her gaze over the last camp, hiding her discomfiture. it sounded like ajei was concluding their time together — another thing sobeille may have been imagining.

she turned over arrluk in her mind. he was an obstacle. but ajei must not know it.

okay. i will come find you den. an uncomfortable silence spanned between them and at last sobeille stood up. ajei, you be tellin’ me if dem dumb girls talk to you again.

she moved off to sapphique’s camp, but would not stay there. that night, she planned to commit a crime that she did not wish ajei to see.

Ajei didn't feel a disconnect. She just didn't know how to answer her friend. She was not sure what the future held. All liklihood, yes Arrluk would be the one she sought if she chose to seek. But also too, she knew sometimes moonwoman had different ideas. She may have already promised her son to someone.

Ajei smiled sweetly, brilliantly. Okay.

Ajei frowned and nodded. I will. They were not kind.

Ajei watched her go, confused and unsure. But perhaps this was just eh way of Sobeille, she held her own counsel and did not seek out others often. Ajei felt lucky enough to be counted a friend.

they were not kind. in sobeille’s approximation this was an understatement.

she held the vision of ajei’s brilliant smile long after her scent wore off her pelt and the warmth under her skin faded.

then, she held that image a little longer — holding it like slow burning fuel that night as she crept into swiftcurrent’s sleeping encampment.