Blackfeather Woods i've got a little black book with my poems in

backdated to 31st of May

Nirgali and Ninazu. Her sons, born of pestilence.

She had sat at the edge of Spiderlings' Glen for two days now, staring at the piles of feces. The worms were beginning to slow, to still, but they still teemed with plague. She didn't get too close—they reeked—but she did not let anyone else near, either. Any effort to remove the sickness from the Glen would be firmly and vehemently quelled by her.

No one would take her babies from her. Not even as she lay in an opiate haze, having consumed enough poppies to bring her solace, yet not enough to steal away her breath, as they had on the island once. Maegi drifted over to one drying heap now, eyes fixed lovingly on the filth.

Nirgali, she cooed, a sound almost like a purr in her throat. She tilted her head to stare at the other. Ninazu. They were the names Peryite had given them—had given her to give to them. She did not think they would receive daedric names. They were far more special than the daedra.

They were hers. Mou's, too, but mainly hers, for they had come from her body, born of her flesh. She had feasted, bloated, ached, cried. . .all for them. And they were perfect.

Two twin piles of feces, tangled up in worms. Her precious babies.

Maegi — Maegi! Called the woman as she paced, raced, fretted and hunted for the pale girl. Panic filled her every inch as Parvati moved between the trees, her belly swinging as she lurched along. She had felt so strange the past few days - so hungry, then so full, then so sick as it all came pouring out of her mouth, day after day of vomit. Now things were different. The sickness seemed to have moved away from her stomach and gone deeper — like it was moving inside of her, changing her. Kicking at her ribs and pushing against her bladder. It was frightening; Parvati had no idea that this was a natural progression to her situation and was hunting for Maegi because she didn't know many women and her first instinct was to find her strongest connection and exploit it.

Maegi -- She called again, weaker, panting. Parvati found her huddled against the earth and the scene was monstrous; but she didn't know what to say or to do, and sank back against her haunches - more like falling to the dirt herself - and rolled to her side while her heavy belly quaked with movement. There's something happening -- something inside, its, they're -- I don't know what to do. It wasn't yet time for the lives inside of her to come out, but Parvati wasn't aware. She was frenzied by her panic and needed a sister, unaware that the nona was dealing with much the same thing.

Maegi!

A call that would have brought her upright, spine straight and eyes alert, in any other mindset. As it was, Maegi only lifted her gaze from Nirgali to stare blankly at the approaching form of Parvati, as if she were a mild curiosity—a leaf on the wind, say—rather than a packmate in trouble.

This blank stare continued as the woman explained her predicament, frightened, trembling. The Melonii impassively watched her writhe for a moment, then nodded, once, as if passing judgment. Like Caesar—thumbs up or down. What verdict had she reached with Parvati?

You are pregnant, she said, voice like an automaton. Congratulations, Parvati. More joy will come to our forest. Her mouth broadened, quite suddenly, in a smile. They'll get to play with Nirgali and Ninazu. My sons. That's exciting, Parvati.

Yes, she knew she was --- wait, why was Maegi smiling like that? Sons?

Th-thank you, I guess, but Maegi -- She was too riled to really catch-on to the mania that had somehow distilled within the pale woman. Parvati tried to focus despite her own terror and discomfort and rambled, Why do I feel like this? Something moving, kicking, f-feel it, here! A fresh wave of internal shuffling began and Parvati tensed, but shifted her weight and positioned herself so that Maegi could look at her ripe belly; there was an almost imperceptible shifting of her flesh, something kicking at her ribs. L-look, do you see it? I can feel them.

Parvati was terrified, and the strain of that terror wasn't so great for the babies inside of her. If she didn't calm down then she could easily slip in to an early delivery and, fearful of this, she had sought out the specter for help. Her gaze shifted to the soil, to the mud and the -- the piles of -- were those worms? With a deep set frown.

Maegi didn't understand why Parvati was so scared. Hadn't she seen pups move within someone before? Relmyna had let her feel her stomach while the twin girls were in her womb. It was only natural that living things would begin to move, even before the transition from one world to the next. Her sons had, too. . .

That is normal, the Melonii explained, her voice serene. It's good. It means they're healthy and alive. Well, or so she gathered. What else would it mean? Maegi was mostly certain that fetuses didn't harbor ill-will toward their mothers and reacted with kicks. They just wanted to get out and run around!

Her head cocked in query, staring at Parvati. Who's the father? she asked pointedly.

She knew deep down what was going on, but was afraid all the same. Fearful of becoming a mother when that was the last thing she had ever wanted; fearful that she would become a brood to the dustrunners of home chief above all, yet fate had brought her to the woods. Parvati hoped there was more to life than mindless worship of gods she did not understand and the birthing of babies for rough men. So far she had learned of a different way to live - Maegi had shown her, and the others too. Yet still she was frightened.

Maegi asked for the name of the father - which surprised her. Surely the stunted man had spoken to his sister of their tryst? Parvati's focus helped alleviate some of her panic and stress as she considered what to say, and knew the truth was all she could offer. Ramsay.

Of all the wolves she had been thinking of, Ramsay hadn't even come to mind. Why? Surely if she was capable of having children, he was, too. And yet, part of her couldn't shake the image of him as still young, still a child. Even Titmouse had occurred to her before her brother! But Ramsay—!

Oh, wow, Maegi whispered, a dazed smile coming over her face. That's. . .amazing. I had no idea. That means. . .we're kind of. . .related? She really didn't know how it worked. Her own parents had forever complicated the notion of family trees for her.

Her eyes drifted toward Nirgali and Ninazu, and then back to Parvati. They were bright but unclear, hazy, like lights in the fog. What are you gonna name them? she slurred slightly.

She did not know what to expect from Maegi; would she be admonished for her actions, chased away, or welcomed? It seemed like nothing could phase the ghost, yet as Parvati named the girl's brother as the father of her soon-to-be-born litter, there was a brief shock that turned in to -- well, something that Parvati didn't have a name for in this language or any other. She watched Maegi glance down to her babies and listened as she spoke, but found that her breast filled with a heartache, a pity, for the loss that Maegi was facing. It dawned on her that it might've been the wrong time to speak of pregnancies and babies with everything going on with the ghost.

I.. Suppose, yes, that makes us sisters... Parvati thought aloud, although she had always thought of Maegi as a sister in some capacity as that was how Parvati had been raised; sisters united in the green, or so it would've been had they lived in the wasteland of her origin. As for names - I haven't really thought about names yet.. I wanted to wait, in case something um, were to go wrong. Bringing up potential loss made Parvati nervous; she glanced at the squirming worms in the mud and then away, unable to watch them for long.

Sisters. She had sisters, ostensibly—Ghost and Astara. But their bond to her seemed tenuous, compared to that which Parvati's pregnancy had created. Maegi felt much more drawn to a woman that would bear her brother's children than flighty half-siblings (if Relmyna was to be believed. . .Ramsay had sown the seeds of doubt in her mind on that matter).

Sure, she murmured, nodding, although the response lacked any weight behind it. Maegi herself hadn't really thought of names; Nirgali and Ninazu had been supplied to her by Peryite, easy as could be. Perhaps the lord of pestilence would visit Parvati, too, and help her out. How many pups do you think you'll have?

Thinking about the future should've been uplifting, but it wasn't like Parvati had planned any of this. She'd escaped one life in trying to avoid becoming a wife, only to fall in to another where she was an unwed brood. A brood to a man she had found pleasing in the moment, but nothing more than the carrier of some accidental, bastard children. Had she been a creature of more intense faith, perhaps Parvati would've found further issue with it. For now it took all of her energy to stay calm; talking it out was helping.

It feels like there are so many inside me, she explained with a touch more morbidity than required. Or one fickle creature with many limbs kicking and fighting, demanding to be fed or to be free. They kick so much now, whoever they are... However many there are, but she did hope it would be a small litter, if only for her own health. Maybe four, five... They are certainly active. Parvati lacked any attachment as she spoke of them; they were little aliens feeding off of her, but she wanted to love them. She wanted to be good.

Strange, if there was just one with many limbs. The thought tickled her fancy; Maegi smirked, openly, not bothering to hide the expression from Parvati. She felt an absurd urge to laugh and choked it down, instead nodding, eyes shifting toward the burgeoning belly.

The more, the merrier, she remarked, shrugging. She turned to pad away, quite suddenly, and flopped down next to Ninazu, nuzzling the pile (but breathing through her mouth, so as to avoid the stench. My, her children were smelly!). I'm just happy we'll all be one big family. How amazing.

It was more or less an invitation for Parvati to exit gracefully. What kind of conversation did one have with a woman who insisted on speaking to literal feces?

Distracted as she was by the sensations inside her body, Parvati swiftly clued-in on the hint that the conversation was coming to an end. She wanted to be present for her friend as she grieved over her lost litter, but - it wasn't really a litter, was it? It was an illness. What if the feelings Parvati was experiencing were the same? What if she wasn't pregnant after all, but incredibly sick? Would her babies burst from her gut like some kind of xenomorph, or leak from her in to a puddle of worms --? The thoughts made her feel ill; so Parvati smiled thinly and with a bow of her head, excused herself as politely - as silently - as she could, and waddled off to find a place to nap.