Stone Circle Luckily I am not alone.

@Greyback

Valette felt lost. So many members left, and so many had vanished in thin air. Her heart was breaking at how little wolves were left. It was hard work to keep all the pups fed, especially now they were becoming bigger and needed more food she couldn't provide it to them. Valette hated it. She liked her pups plump. Luckily they had their extra fats from being a well fed pup before all these tremors had. Then there was the matter of her being worried for her mate. He had bumped his head and she wanted to be strong and take care of him. But she didn't feel strong she felt her leadership being tested more than ever.

Valette came into the den and saw Greyback. When she saw him she couldn't keep her emotions at bay. After all, she was not doing this leadership alone now. She was doing it together. She burst out in sobbing as she saw him and just had to snuggle against him for comfort. She was a heartbroken mother who felt like a failed pack leader. She couldn't keep her pack together moment of terror.

The steady pace of paw-steps, light as a feather to his ears before silence. It gripped his attention, making him hold his breath before turning towards the mouth of the den. There he saw Valette, her silhouette cast before him from the light of the outside. He could not see her face, but with a sniff he stood up and walked towards her, meeting her halfway in a crash of warmth.

Surprise took him, and he looked down upon where she had wormed into his chest. Her sobs echoed around him, and he did his best to bend down to 'hug' her. "My love, what troubles you?" He asked in that soothing voice he always reserved for her. His tone was normally harsh, stone around others, but only in the darkness— away from prying eyes of others would it melt into something warm and fuzzy. His own gift to her. "Shh, shh." he cooed over and over, urging her to settle down, to breath.

Valette was glad for her mate's comfort. Ever since Steady she had not gotten a mate that could offer her comfort or one who she could show her insecurities. With Stark he had been sick and she had to be the strong one. With Steady, now she thought of it, she had wanted to be strong as well, to prove herself. However, with Greyback... It was different. Before they were mated he had seen her cry, he had seen her upset or heartbroken. It was easier with him. She just melted in his embrace and slowly calmed down her sobs.

"I just feel like I failed. We were thriving, and-- and-- Now Indra is dead, Clay has gone missing. Steph left with Sunny, I assume. I just hope that she is okay. I wanted to keep everyone safe but I didn't. What kind of Matriarch does that make me!?" She had always been proud of her leadership and her pack. How they thrived but in a time of hardship she didn't feel like she provided. But there was one thing, one thing she could not bare to do. She didn't want to leave Easthollow, their home. But food was hard to come by. Was she going to be stubborn and stick around? Or would she leave the one place that had rooted her? "My heart is broken," she whispered, mostly with all the hardship everyone had to endure and she had always been empathic towards her pack mates, her family. She also worried about Greyback and his health.

AAH IVE BEEN SO BUSY, TODAY WAS THE ONLY DAY I GOT TO REPLY! D: I will admit my must isnt the best right now, and writing this whole thing has seemed a bit out of place. I hope it flows some-what well! I will try harder next post

"I just feel like I failed. We were thriving, and-- and-- Now Indra is dead, Clay has gone missing. Steph left with Sunny, I assume. I just hope that she is okay. I wanted to keep everyone safe but I didn't. What kind of Matriarch does that make me!?"

"My heart is broken,"


He pulled his ears back as Valette continued to cry into his fur, her tears soaking through and making it damp and heavy. He would continue to coo at her, resting his chin against her warmth as she took what she needed from it.

In time it seemed to work, her sobs quieting down and breath growing steady enough for her to force words out to him. He smiled at that and closed his eyes to listen.

And as she talked it hurt him so to hear her thoughts, to hear how they dragged her down and down. A realization was beginning to dawn on Greyback, one that shocked him. Valette was spiraling out of control. The weight of the crown that used to fit so naturally on top of her head was slipping, and she was struggling to hold on. He listened as she fumbled, questioning not only herself, but her love as well.

He moved against her as she talked, his head weighing down to rest his head's weight along her broad shoulders. It was the only thing he could think of to do. "You haven't failed, my heart." He whispered. "This is but a hiccup, it will pass. Everything will be alright." Would it though? The man fell silent after that, rethinking his words. "Indras death was not our fault, we could of done nothing to stop her. As with Steph... your children have always had the urge to fly away from home." he offered.

AH NO IT IS PERFECT!!!

Valette took comfort from the warmth coming from her mate's body. She still felt incredibly sad, plus with everything happening it also lowered her confidence level quite a bit. The mother took quiet breaths to calm herself but she still felt her heart racing and her stomach growling. The female went to lie down, as her empty belly was protesting. She did everything to feed the others, really. Not keen on eating much herself. The pups had taken a lot from her fat layer, leaving her with little since the quakes started. She was thinning quickly now most of her reserves were gone.

"You are too kind," she disagreed. She looked at her paws for a moment. Her children did have a tendency to fly out and return at random times. She just wished that they would tell her. She leaned against her mate. "It doesn't feel like a hiccup. I feel exhausted," she admitted. "I hope some prey returns soon." Would she even be in a shape to hunt? This was concerning. "And here I am talking only about me. Selfish," she ended in a mutter. "How are you? How is your head?," she asked.

As Valette moved to lay down he followed her, his flank to her's, adamant that the warmth they shared not be broken. He was no fool to the weightless feel of her, the ridges of her bones raised slightly through her skin, the lack of warmth she carried. He, himself, had been rapidly loosing weight since the prey was driven away. More than half of every scrap he got had been given to his kids, mostly West, who seemed to be almost the same size as him.

"You're too kind."

"And You're freezing," he whispered, skipping over the question and not wanting to touch on that subject. Greyback knew he was most kind when compared to others. "No wonder why you're exhausted, you're as frail as a bird... I mean—not frail. You're the strongest woman I know. You're just—" the man let his eyes wander and he cartoonishly scanned her up and down. "You know what I mean."

"The prey will have to return soon. We just have to keep faith. If Clay doesn't return within the next day I shall go look for him.— No you're not selfish, my love. You have concerns that I share as well."

He smiled as she asked about his health. In reality he was getting older, the once dark roan fur that colored his face was now greying at his muzzle, giving way to white flecks of hair that contrasted heavily. His joints ached every morning and night, and his back was beginning to get rigid which each passing month. Greyback was no longer young. "I'm doing as well as I was as a whelp. No bump can slow me down!" He joked, roaring in laughter in attempt to brighten the conversation.

Valette just snuggled more against Greyback in response. He was always warm and perfect to snuggle against. Her ear twitched when Greyback stumbled over his words. She could only smile because she could never interpret Greyback's words that way. She nodded. "I know, but I cannot eat without feeling guilty. I usually give it to the ones that need food the most," Valette admitted to him. She couldn't really say no to her children.

"I keep my eyes on the look out for prey," Valette assured him. When Greyback started about Clay Valette looked to her paws at first. She was thoughtful for a long moment. "Don't. Clay doesn't want to be found. I always got the feeling that he was never happy here and that everything I did made him hate me," she admitted quietly. She didn't understand what she had done wrong. She had been a loving mother, Greyback had been stricter with him most times. "I think if we go look for him he will only run away further," she sighed.

It was controversial but all with previous litters heading out in the world she was getting better at letting them go. Clay was far to stubborn to listen and she hated the idea of Greyback going after Clay which would make him hate his father more. "I'm glad, my love," she spoke quietly then. A warm smile touched her lips as his hearty laugh made her feel better. "I hope times will turn around for us," she admitted and closed her eyes as she was tired.

"I understand my love," he cooed, licking against her fur once more. Truth be told, he did understand, but wasn't exactly happy about it. He wanted to go bring his son home, and even wondered if his son was okay. The poor boy was frail, lithe, and so young when he had run. Greyback wondered if he was even alive, part of him was sure he wasn't.

"We will meet him again, fate always brings those who have lost each other back together. Maybe in spring he will come home to meet his new siblings?" Greyback questioned, his voice rising in suggestion as he talked about the future. He remembered spring so clearly last time— the courting, the fun and thrill of finally laying claim to his mate, and the silhouette of her round with his young, waddling around.

"It will, my love. I am sure of it." he sighed, watching her close her eyes and drift off to what he assumed was sleep. He would lay his head down next to hers, snuggled up against her warmth.

Valette loved that Greyback had such hope that Clay would return. The matriarch had lost that hope after losing so many. She had a feeling Clay was not returning, though if he would she would welcome him. He was her son after all. Valette slowly arched an eyebrow when Greyback started about another litter this year. The female could feel a jolt of eagerness run through her. God she wanted more pups. "Are you sure? Our last litter made you a bit grey," she teased him, clearly still over the moon with his looks.

Last litter was heavy on her too. Her smile faded for a moment when she thought about the two that hadn't made it. It had also taken a toll on her body. She was not getting any younger, but she knew when the moment would be there that she would want him again. She couldn't deny that it had been good raising pups together instead of alone. Valette closed her eyes as well, god, Nanook's reaction if she would tell her she would be pregnant once more. She had to smile at that. Good memories, eager to have another year filled with bundles of joy.

Greyback nodded to her. Of course he was sure! "Of course im sure! No grey has never stopped me, besides, I vex to break it to you, my stars, but I was greying well before then. Speak for yourself—you are the one that has greyed the most." He joked, laughing a bit deep within his chest.

"But perhaps we shall talk of this more later, for now you need rest..."

Valette opened her eyes and faked an offended look before smiling. She had been greying a bit. She hoped it would fade but the stress of losing children and members was tough on her. Valette hummed softly. "How can I sleep when you speak of such enticing things," she murmured, though her eyes were closed again. Remembering a time when she was showing but not having too many effects of the weight of her belly. "I will just dream of me being round with your pups again," she hummed, but had to open one eye to see his reaction. Slowly the smile faded, another day she would let him at this moment her body did need rest.

and with that both the Easthollow leaders fell silent.

Valette fell asleep. And Greyback?

Well... he took a much needed walk.

-fin-