Luneshale Pass Night poem

Toula leans into the touch, sighing softly. her gaze is distant as she admits, it is in the past. it is in the Land of Reeds. it is here, too—with the princes, but mostly with my people, Eset among them! the God of Dreams brought me my father. I remember nothing, truly, of that dream except for this: to not choose a prince for Pharaoh would incite war. it is not that I think she is wrong for it, it is that I think… I perhaps am right for it. but for Akashingo, it would mean blood. and I am happiest, to be Queen, she reveals, if it means there is none of that. but if Ashikaga truly means to be Pharaoh— she closes her eyes. 
and she saw the blood. no, Toula did not want it for herself, not like this. not for Ashikaga, either—surely Ashikaga could not want that either! not if she loved Akashingo. they open quickly, and she speaks softly: what would my father say now? did it matter? does my sister not understand that the Gods brought her here because I asked for the return of my family? not to be Pharaoh! that was for Makono! …or a brother, should he return. they would be married, and the question of who must I pick might be eradicated entirely. no, not true—she would likely ask her brother to take another husband, too, as he might take another wife if he someday wished. so long as she was the principal one among them, the truth was she did not mind it! but so many had been taken from her too soon—Osiris had seen perhaps three. yes, if Makono was not returned to her now… that must be what it meant.
why must everything be about power? and that, perhaps most of all, was why she did not wish to become Pharaoh—she did not desire to turn into one who moved with only this in mind.