Cerulean Cape don't cry for yesterday

@Caiaphas please? :D

Perhaps now wasn't the best time to leave Redhawk Caldera, what with the illness that riddled the pack. Pantaleimon had been feeling pretty decent when he left home, but was beginning to feel a shiver in his joints when he reached the ocean. Reaching the cape at one of the closest points to the Caldera (but still quite a far and risky walk, Pan realised all too well), Pantaleimon sniffed in the ocean air and he smiled as the wind whipped at his fur. Even if Ankyra Sound and Sirensong Cove were pale memories in his mind that he didn't like to revisit, Mother Sea would always hold a special place in Pantaleimon's heart. He missed her where he was now. Standing here made him feel even more a lady than he did all the time, anyway; it was as if he was no longer confused. He was female; he was a Siren.

Grey afternoon clouds cluttered the skies around him as Pantaleimon stood on the sandy shores, staring out onto the angry ocean with a soft, fond smile on his face. It was almost as if his Goddess greeted him, too, calling to him as a Siren, and Pan couldn't resist slowly walking towards the water to dip his paws in, and maybe take a swim while he was here, to feel the intensity of this feeling even stronger.

as caiaphas trawled the barren sand for any deposit of edibles, she thought she scented an alarmingly familiar smell. the sylph froze and lifted her skull aloft, rawboned muzzle working against the whipping wind as she plied from the brine the scent of a wolf she distinctly recognized.

she entertained the idea of leaving, and letting those who were tied to her past to go on believing she was gone or dead. but in the end, her insatiable curiosity overtook her and she found her legs compelled of their own accord to bring her to the pale male-who-was-not-male.

the interim in which she had been acquainted with pan had been a small window -- small enough in that caiaphas felt there was still more to learn from the sound's last drudge. he was in the water, half blended with the rippling white of seafoam -- and it was not until caiaphas was nearly upon him that she spoke. "ah -- the acolyte returns."

Only when she was close enough to speak did Pantaleimon notice the familiar wolf's approach. His eyes widened and when she spoke he jumped back out of reflex; except he was half in the ocean, so this caused him to lose his footing among the ocean's floor and submerge in the water for a moment with a distressed spluttering sound. This was not the connection to the ocean Pantaleimon had intended for.

Quick to hoist himself from the water and find his footing on the sandy ocean floor again, Pantaleimon spluttered out: "Y-you..." His lips remained parted after that, lips quivering as though he had more to say but the words just wouldn't come out.

the iron waif had not meant to startle him -- yet startle him she did. so affected was he by surprise he fell into the capping waves and but for a moment was gone entirely from view. he resurfaced nearly immediately, the shearwater spluttering from his lips as he turned to face her. the sylph would be lying if she said she did not exact some sort of cruel enjoyment in seeing him suffer the taste of salt -- but it had never been her intention.

she offered a wane and thoughtless smile, the corners of her mouth uplifted as if mocking a jester's insipid jeer. "me." she finished, the smile cruel against her gaunt features. nothing else was said -- instead, she waited for pan to do the talking.

Pantaleimon looked at Caiaphas' face for only a mere moment before averting his gaze in natural submission. He emerged from the waves of the ocean, almost as though a pup caught stealing food that did not belong to it; as if he had done wrong by submerging himself with the ocean, for it was only the Sirens' to enjoy. A sudden feeling of guilt overwhelmed Pantaleimon as he realised that he had deserted the pack, even though he had been one of the wolves that was last to sit upon Ankyra Sound's sandy shores and wait, praying and hoping for the Queen's return or for some other stroke of luck to mar his future. Reek had been that stroke of luck, and that was what had directed him towards Redhawk Caldera, where he'd found his next stroke of luck: Peregrine.

Now riddled with guilt Pantaleimon lowered his body immediately after he emerged from the water, keeping his gaze averted by instinct and natural respect. Me. A simple word, a simple appearance, yet it held so much meaning, for she was part of the Nereides legacy, and therefore a part of much of Pantaleimon's life. A life that had been washed away so easily upon his joining the Caldera, and yet now was raised from the dead, it seemed, by the appearance of one wolf. "M-my..." Pantaleimon swallowed dryly, the water's salt drying up his tongue and scratching his already itchy and sore throat. "... Q-queen." And there Pantaleimon stood, looking defeated, body low and tail tucked between hind legs. Ready to await orders, the salvation of death, or whatever else she were to demand, even though there was no part of present-Pan that wanted to give up any of the things he had waiting at Redhawk Caldera.

oops pressed enter too early -_-

caiaphas nearly doubled back as pan displayed a theatrical gesture of submission -- one in which caiaphas wasn't expecting. her slender ears pulled back and she nearly sniggered -- queen was no longer her title, and ruling no longer her deportment.

"easy there," the sylph said wrly, her expression bemused. "such gestures are no longer necessary." while she appreciated the humble display of sub-ordinance, she had no weight or crown to bear. but she was curious -- what had pan been doing since her departure? "good to see you again, comrade."

The Siren Queen insisted that she was not such any longer. Pantaleimon hesitated a moment, uncertain how to respond, his ears quivering in confusion. She said it was good to see him — if only he could say the same.

Pantaleimon felt confused, and, with Caiaphas' rejection of his offer of services, hanging in the balance between fleeing and submitting further. Pan did not know what to say when she said it was good to see him; he did not feel the same.

"W-why... Why are you here?" Pantaleimon asked, keeping his gaze averted while he did so.

why are you here? pan's question wrung forth a small frown from the slyph, as if his inquiry injured her greatly. she couldn't answer -- not in a few syllables. instead, she let the silence rise between the two of them as her reply; the sea's hum before them; the wind's call around them. they would answer for her -- they knew.

"the better question is -- why are you?" she could tell pan was not starving and could assume, perhaps rightly, that he was not a dispersal wolf. this meant he had found a niche -- somewhere to treat him better than caiaphas could. she shifted her posture, leaning back a little as to give him room to re-compose himself.

Pantaleimon heard no answer beside the ocean's gentle rush, and it was that gentle rush that answered the Siren Queen's next answer. A brief smile tugged at his lips while he glanced at the ocean, sideways; even if many bad memories clung to his life as a Nereides consort, Pantaleimon loved the ocean, and more than any other place in the world it made him feel like the Siren that he felt he was in his heart.

He remained submissive, standing up straight but tail hanging limp between hind legs. "Mother sea," Pan murmured, barely audible above the rush of the ocean. It had been too long since he'd visited her.

caiaphas cast a doleful gaze out the sea where the brine bucked up and down with shadowplay and crested foam. an ear remained on the sickly comrade, who admitted his reason for revisit -- a shame, she thought, that he did not return to behold her wonderful company. a wry smile played briefly on her muzzle yet it was hardly there longer than the rolling flick of a wave before a darker thought washed across her countenance.

"enjoy it while you can -- i like you, but you are on my land. at some point, i will ask you to leave." despite their past affinity, caiaphas was not softened by prior affection -- she spoke coldly, a conise wryness capturing her words. she pulled away from him towards the jagged stones that marked the sound's promontory -- from there she would watch, and await his eventual departure. unless of course he had anything else he needed to ask her.

Pantaleimon wondered if she were to claim these lands as her own, like she once had claimed Ankyra Sound, but he did not ask. He just looked away, not sure what to say or how to reply, a sheepish and forced smile he did not really mean on his face.

Pan watched as she departed and stayed a little while, shoulders hunched and face uncertain as he beheld her, before eventually he departed from the scene, not even dipping himself in the ocean again. It would only leave a bitter aftertaste in his mouth, after all.