Moonspear Where everything's safe and it doesn't get worse

Fennec breathed out and now tried to keep her own patience. He wasn’t wrong, but that wasn’t the point. She wasn’t trying to upset him, she just… she wanted the opposite. And she couldn’t figure out how the fuck to get him to see that.

Because I think it is mostly about me. And I don’t think you ever are actually honest with me about how you feel about me because you are so worried about hurting my feelings. Is it really so bad for me to want to know, so I can try to actually get better instead of constantly fucking up and making things worse? She knew she was going to misfire on this.

She didn’t know when talking to Fig had gotten to hard. He had never been like Penn, but it felt like he didn’t used to take her so seriously, and she didn’t used to feel like she had to be careful not to upset him. It had just been so long, she barely remembered.

I want you to want to come back to see me too. And I don’t want to fuck it up when you do. I want to make you happy, too, and I can’t do that unless you let me try.

She was losing her fight in this conversation though, the words getting softer. Maybe it wasn’t worth it. Maybe she was selfish for not just letting him go. Maybe it was all in her head, and he wouldn’t understand where she was coming from because where she was coming from didn’t make any fucking sense.

She hated every bit of this. She didn’t know what else to say.