Lion Head Mesa novella

her wife was gone. qiao was gone. makono was gone.

tavina was not someone who wept, and her nights had grown bitter with it.

slowly she grew away from akashingo, her heart hardening. and still she would not leave, believing she must see the new young queen to a stable footing.

she sat atop the mesa as evening fell, eyes staring out over the land.

the dogtag - as always.

he heaved himself up the last step. instead of the unpreceded view of akashingo's claim, it was the blasted god-sun that got in his eyes. 

gucci stepped forth rubbing his face with a paw.

when it lowered, he saw her.

he... wished it was emotions that swelled within him. regret. embarrassment. fear, if he cared.

but no. the neb felt only familiarity. nostalgia. soft like the dust on a prized belonging long gone unused.

he walked to her side.

gucci seated himself on her left. wrapped his tail about his feet.

"... pretty view." he commented after a long quiet.

it tasted dry and stale in his mouth.

oh, what a pair they were! world-weary, tired, the jangle of his familiar collar in her ears.

"i have half a mind to retire, gucci," tavina said at last with nothing of her usual bite in the words. "and yet i wonder what would become of toula if i did."

surrounded by sycophants and ambitious men, her future was already designed and decided. she needed the strength of women also, but tavina was not sure she could do it any longer.

he snorted. 

"an' leave us sans a bonesetter?" but he, too, could not put character into his words. 

nor could he blame her.

"where would ya go?" gucci did not look to her, instead keeping his eyes on the long shadows of brecheliant, a migration of bison over the plains, the blackfeather woods, the shine of water beyond...

her smile was quick and bitter. "i don't know. maybe i'll leave altogether. you'll find another bone-setter, gucci."

at last she sought his eyes and her own were filled with a vacuous sort of pain that tavina rarely showed. "what keeps you here?"

his laugh - as fast, as acrid.

"mah legs, chiefly." he wouldn't look at her, feeling like he hadn't the right. show some shame 'afore a friend ya ain't done naw good for.

a sigh.

"mah children. ah'd brave th' wilds mahself if midas could stay safe. n @Medusa... well. she's an adder." said with a smile. "she don't need her pa no more, but a man has his worries..."

another, deeper sigh. he lowered himself to the stone.

"... but again, legs. ah ain't naw howlin' wolf, naw yappin 'yote. can't gamble on 'nother pack. gotta keep this'un whole." 

even though these days it seemed like the very redstone of the mesa was attempting to walk away.

still a wit, this one. "i suppose i agree," tavina said, though it was with an empty sort of light.

"you know, we were to have children this year. we'd even gone out and ..." but the sesh's voice trailed here, and she crossed her paws, and felt her mouth pull down in bitterness.

"well. all that's over now. we should prepare for the next royal children, perhaps, help to raise toula in a better world than the one from which she came."

a pang of sorrow so sharp and throughout!

he moved as if to place a paw on hers, but restrained himself. set it down. looked back at the horizon.

"tavina... ye's a... a givin' soul. but ya couldn't- ya shouldn't bury that bad stuff in work." his toes flexed on the sun-baked redsand. 

his face lifted to look at hers.

"if it's... time ya need, tah process, tah solve... we'll find another sesh. toss 'em out on their tail moment ya come back, 'fcourse. 's no fair havin' tah compete wi' you." the little man hoped his smile was encouraging, even though his eyes conveyed a saddened expression.

last for me! <3

nala had gone, and with her the future.

perhaps she might return, but for now, tavina only gave a pained smile to her friend.

"akashingo is stuck with me. but i'll try," even though it was a lie as she said it, and soon the agonized doctor took her silent, prowling leave.

he let her go, and in his heart felt - in spite of reason - that in some way, he were to blame. that he weren't near enough a friend. good enough a listener.

he'd make it his duty, from that point on, to find tavina's girl.