Sawtooth Spire Wanna believe, wanna believe that you don't have a bad bone in your body

Out onto her worn arms, she wept away the pain of recent weeks, the forsaken feeling that had taken up residence in her breast, the feelings of unworthiness that grew and grew with every passing day. Her inability to be all that her two children needed, and her unwillingness to accept more disrespect from the third she was expected to care for. Confident as she was, she'd always disliked herself, but now it was tenfold what it used to be.

An inadequate mother.

An inadequate woman.

Mahler's whine tore her from her misery; she lifted her narrow head to pin him with teary eyes that went cold the instant they landed on him. Abruptly, she choked off the well of sorrow that spilled onto her cheeks, blinked away the tears, and let her hackles lift threateningly. How dare he. How dare he come upon her like this and have the arrogance to hang his head that way, to look as haggard as he did, to behave as though his entire life had been turned upside down, when he had made himself too busy for them. Unavailable to his cubs who yearned for him. And she had been the one left to take care of everything while he spent his hours with another woman and their offspring, and she hadn't been enough.

She gathered her legs beneath her and launched herself across the distance Mahler left between them, not desperate for his embrace, but desperate to rend his head from his neck. She stopped just short of striking him, puffed up like a pissed off cat, and snarled, go. He had no right to be here and witness her pain manifest, not when he'd been so busy with his new family that he'd neglected his old one, and now his son was gone. Now he wanted to be here for her, when it was far too late. She had asked him to prove that his contract was just a contract, that the family he had with her was more significant to him. He'd done the exact opposite.

She loved him, but he was breaking her heart, their childrens' hearts, and now one of them was missing.

She loved him, but right now, she despised him more.