Noctisardor Bypass He'd never upset you, never forget you

Many times Anselm had seen the storm brewing in Etienne’s gaze. Yet, never once had he weathered it.

The storm became a downpour, battering down upon the hard and impermeable rock that was Anselm’s conscience. He withstood it, despite the way something inside of him shriveled when he saw how dismissive Etienne was; how he pulled himself to his full height and dusted the dirt from him as if it were Anselm he was ridding himself of.

Hurt poured out from Etienne, a river finding its teeth along Anselm’s banks. He shuddered, each word a gale against his skin. He believed none of what Etienne said was really true, but it did not matter what was true — it mattered what Etienne thought, and he had left nothing to the imagination.

A healthier person would acknowledge the hurt and apologize for their part in it. But Anselm felt too attacked to own up to his wrongdoing. Throughout this, his fur bladed.

You think you are the only vonne feeling unloved? He sucked between clenched teeth, his temper rising. No vonne asks if I’m okay either. That’s what being an adult is, Etienne. You grow up and people stop caring about you.

His pride still stung from Etienne’s accusation concerning Heda. It was not as if they’d done anything since that first act — but even that small justification scarcely addressed the burning guilt he felt looking into the sunfire eyes of the man he knew meant more to him than he would ever admit out loud.

Unable to help himself, and feeling he must shoot at Etienne before the man cut him down first, Anselm’s voice roseIf you are so unhappy, vhy do you stay?! You make yourself the victim vhen you could just — leave!