Ravensblood Forest serenity

ooofff <3

his voice was even and gentle. heda felt tears pressing behind her eyes and in her throat. it was all so shameful, wasn't it?
her chin trembled. she was so embarrassed to be here. and yet she was desperate to be here, to speak the things unsaid, for bartholomew alone was so trusted. 
his voice said he did not understand.
"well," she began, and her voice felt garbled. "i have — i have been trying to figure out how i love you since then." as a teacher. as a friend. as a priest. all of those ways.
"i guess — ah, when i saw you w-with her, i —" she shut her eyes tightly and inhaled a shaky breath, "you know, maybe i didn't realize i wanted that too. with — you."
she pawed savagely at the ground, the scent of the red sap all around them now. "s-so, now i just have to figure it out, you know. i — bartholomew, i don't want things to be weird between us," heda said, haunted, her eyes searching his. "now i've made it — weird. and all because i don't — know how to feel." the words rolled. she finally cut them off and breathed again and paced a step away, unburdened and yet riddled with guilt to know he held the weight now.