Blacktail Deer Plateau blue and brown jansport, tired of public transport

the vaguest post of the century for @Aningan
nts: 3w 4d
edit; changing the thread title so the lyrics can be in order DONT MIND ME 

Everything hurt.

Mind, heart, body. Not the strongest herb nor the greatest comforts could heal him. The truth had caught up to him and it hit like a brick.

Cupid left the forest in worse shape then he came. It was not the mountain he ran back to. He found no comfort in those gentle slopes anymore. They were what they always had been: a prison. And now it was a reminder of where everything began to go wrong.

Rather than veering eastward, he shot straight. Once again he found himself in front of a border, struggling to support his own weight. Cupid howled without much of a thought. He just needed help right now, anything would do.

The howl that sounded was unfamiliar, as most tended to be as of late—but Aningan thought he was getting pretty good at responding to them, asking the right questions. But when he arrived before the other wolf, this one seemed different: struggling to support her own weight, looking worse for wear than those previously met. Seeing this, the first words to leave his mouth were, “Are you okay?” as he stopped a few meters away. Should he call for someone else to help? Was he supposed to help, given that she was a stranger? The questions that he bombarded himself with were soon forcibly swallowed whole, to be saved for a later date—and by a later date, he really meant that he didn’t plan on ever revisiting them.

When the man approached, Cupid caved in on himself. One could easily mistake it for a submissive stance, but in reality he did so out of disgust. Just thinking about his body—what was inside it, how it would make him look—made him want to throw up. He didn't need any eyes on it.

Help me. Please, he said, looking up at the male. I'll do anything.

Aningan’s body grew rigid whilst the other crumpled, concern scrawled across his face; although he struggled when it came to connecting with those he did not know, he was also not someone that could so easily dismiss a plea for help. “What happened?” he asked, taking a step closer and looking her over—he couldn’t see any obvious signs of wounds, nor could he smell blood in the air. But something didn’t seem right. “Can you walk?” Maybe he should call for Erzulie or Rosalyn—would they be able to help? Would they know what was wrong?

a woman, curved in on herself. she had not meant to be here, or anywhere near a stranger. but the way she curled in on herself; it elicited some deep-rooted empathy that would not have her stand by. and so, carefully, she stepped toward the pair, auds pressed forward. "aningan?" comes her careful question, unwilling, or perhaps unable, to ask the stranger herself why she's doing, well, that.

His face heated up when he was asked the question. It had been so easy to dismiss these things before."I'm fine," was what he wished to say, but instead he made a few "uhhs" and a couple "ums". Cupid was not fine, far from it. Too far to act, but not too far to dance around the answer. I'm sick. Obviously not a lie, but it was only part of the story. and I can barely walk.

He turned his attention to an approaching girl. More eyes. He scrunches up more, turning his nose slightly to avoid making eye contact. An ear faces the pair, waiting for an answer.

Another voice sounded from his side and Aningan glanced her way, spying Clementine. He gave a slow shrug of his shoulders, having no better of an answer to give her than the female before them. “We can try to help,” was his eventual answer, gaze drifting from his packmate to the stranger. “What’s your name? How are you sick?” He assumed her stomach must be aching, based on her posture and words. Would Erzulie be able to help? He glanced towards Clem again.

“Do you think your mom could help?” he asked. “I don’t know much about healing…” Actually, he didn’t know anything about healing. But, y’know, details.

"she can help," she promises, sure of the fact. her mother has never given her any reason not to believe that her knowledge is without limit, her wisdom without doubt. "I'll find her." with that, she slips back the way she'd come; intent on finding @Erzulie and returning with her mother by her side, complete with a brief description of what she'd noted thus far.

she took only what was necessary and accompanied clementine to the borders. aningan there. but her interest was seized by the odd wolf, whose scent proclaimed outside of what the masculine demeanour suggested.
it was the fragrance of pregnancy lacing the other that caused erzulie to narrow her gaze. "you are sick? what be de symptoms?" came the healer's inquiry; she settled before the stranger on her haunches, intending to relax the entire group somewhat.

Cupid, he replied hastily. The second answer did not come as easily as the first. His whole body began to heat up, adding onto the discomfort that was already there. He felt embarrassed and guilty and disgusting. He wondered if it was even worth it to say anything. But the cost of not telling him of something like this was too great. He waited for the kid to leave before speaking again. Slowly, quietly, he said, I'm uh. I'm having a kid. Disgust pierces through him and he is unable to speak until the girl returns with her mother.

Cupid turned to the trio. His stomach did flips as he scanned over each of their gazes. I-I'm- He took a deep breath to steady the stammering. My stomach's been hurting for awhile and I haven't been able to eat in days.

Aningan shot Clementine a grateful glance when she offered to go find her mother, then turned his attention back to the stranger. A name was given and then an explanation followed: the wolf was pregnant; it took him a second to process the meaning, linking it with the Inuttut phrase that mirrored her meaning. And when it settled in his mind, understood now, his confusion only grew. Was there something wrong with the puppies that she hunched over so harshly? Silence followed until they were joined again by the mother-daughter duo.

The male was quiet for a moment, allowing the healer to ask her questions and the troubled one to answer. He listened closely to what was said despite not having any clue as to how to remedy it, waiting. And when silence fell over them again, he looked to his second and added, “She is pitsalik—with child. Does that cause the pain?” Whether or not that made any difference, he could not be certain—but felt better to make it known than keep it hidden away.

aningan offers more information, and clem looks toward the woman with more interest. something about her seems off. not only the sickness, but something that she can not entirely pinpoint. but the knowledge that they might be able to help is gladdening, and so her gaze turns from the stranger to her mother again, auds canted forward and asking silently, what can I do?

erzulie did not recall having met a wolf akin to the one here now upon rusalkan borders. dark ears attended aningan's offer of more information. with child. nausea and disinterest in food were quite common maladies in early pregnancy, but erzulie suspected there was more to the situation than a mere childbearing.
"how many weeks?" she murmured, more softly now. the young wolf was clearly distressed, and she sought to soothe the air between them, glancing to clementine. "an' have you fallen? ingested a bad t'ing?"

At this point Aningan may as well rip his insides out, because it sure did feel like it when he gave the information. A cold sensation climbed up his spine, turning warmer as it flushed into his cheeks. He wanted to snap at the male. He wanted to tell him that he was not a woman, just as he had time and time again. It had been easier back then because his body wasn't preparing to bare young. Now it was, and his appearance would morph soon, making it all the more obvious. Cupid felt helpless.

He tried to think about how long it had been since he first met Mal. His thoughts are consumed by the man and his helpless little field. I don't know. A month at least. I can't remember clearly. He just wanted to forget about all of it.

I mean, I've fallen a bit, but it wasn't anything serious. He remembered trying to climb up Courtfall's slopes. It was a miserable failure, but it was a small drop. Haven't eaten anything bad either.

my dumbass didn’t realise it was my turn /henlo operator i would like new brain plz n thx

Aningan remained attentive as more questions were asked and answers given. But, like Clementine, he kept silent; there was nothing worthwhile for him to add, given the situation. The northerner knew nothing about healing those that fell ill and even less about pregnancy—after all, that latter was not something he would ever experience firsthand, so how could he know anything about it? His lack of knowledge on the former was, however, more by choice than anything; he could feed the sick and keep them warm but, aside from that, his assistance was limited and he felt it was better that way—certainly better than him being trusted with correctly identifying plants. So, he stood back and gave Erzulie room to investigate, waiting to see if there was anything he could help with.

she wondered if the time were significant. the girl knew frightfully little about pregnancy and all that led to it, and so saw this whole situation as a learning opportunity. she felt bad about it, albeit, the woman seemed to be in quite a bit of pain. any benefit she might gain from the interaction felt tainted, then. her own chest ached for the stranger's obvious discomfort, though remained quiet at her mother's side as she listened. suddenly, she wondered if she were an unwanted party, here; the youngest, and lacking any experience. but it was too late to disappear now, and so there she remained.

so there was little reason to suspect that the wolf was due to lose the pups. erzulie nodded, turned her gaze back toward clementine. so much to be explained, to be taught, to be learned, but the foremost question pressed upon her tongue.
the harlot returned her attention to the invalid at their borders, quiet, appraising. if it had been a woman, erzulie would have asked politely aningan to depart, to allow the newcomer the relief of a feminine space. but this was not a woman, despite the pregnancy. aningan might be more welcome.
"do you want to keep dese babes?" erzulie asked of the stranger, directly, searchingly.

During the last few weeks he had thought of a lot of things regarding children. However, whether he wanted them in the first place had never crossed his mind. Maybe that was dor a reason, because when the woman asked the question his brain went haywire.

This was his mistake and he couldn't erase it just like that. But that wasn't true was it? There was a multitude of ways he could solve this problem, all ending with blood. But he wouldn't be able to bring himself to do any of these things, right? Maybe he did.

As a child he always dreamed of being happy and that dream has never faded. Freedom gave him a sliver of happiness. Freedom to go wherever he wanted to go, do what he wanted to do, be who he wanted to be. Who he really was. Cupid is not a parent. Cupid is not a mother. Cupid is not a woman. But with a baby, the world would pin these labels onto him. And the worst part is he wouldn't be able to get rid of them. As long as a child fed from his belly, he'd always be seen as a woman.

Say you don't want this baby, Cupid. Stop this before it's too late.

Yes. His answer shocked him at first, then angered him. That anger turned to sadness and that sadness was concealed by reluctant acceptance. He wanted to be happy, but he'd be a fool to believe he'd be truly happy one day. Misery was inevitable. He'd rather deal with it now while he's prepared.

skipping kuro w permission!

a long pause, and then erzulie nodded toward the answer. "early pregnancy is de culprit dis time," she explained kindly. "i can give you mint to settle your stomach an' some saltweed to chew a bit till de sickness passes." the harlot did not understand, but it was not for her to comprehend. cupid would have a litter within rusalka, but erzulie was no midwife.
she glanced to aningan then. "be needin' a place to stay, den," she murmured, knowing his kind heart would speak first.

very short post sorry rippp

He smiled (rather pathetically) and nodded. Thank you. Mint is an herb he was familiar with, saltweed was not. He'd see soon enough.

He glanced between the woman and Aningan, awaiting what either had to say.