Stone Circle Your Mother Should Know

it is timeeeeeeeee Mometteeeeee! @Valette

It had been a while since the female was on Easthollow grounds, the territory almost seemed new to her, the grounds felt foreign as she stepped. The blades of grass brushed against her legs as she strolled through the grounds, her tail swishing with the rhythm of the wind and her ears forward with anticipation. There was a lot of thinking since her last encounter in Easthollow, events that she could not stay to process for she feared she would lash. However, there were some loose ends that were in need of tying up, knots that were twisting her heart and causing her mind to fog, she needed justice, justification. Her movements slowed to a stop as she approached an enclosed space where it seemed private. She needed to speak to her alone. But she knew that she could not return without gifts, so the girl came prepared with traveling back and forth with mouths of small prey that were as small as a mouth and to as plump as a rabbit. She herself looked more healthy than she did 3 months ago, she remained neutral about that though, for even though those events have ended, the memories were still fresh in her mind. The anger she felt still lingered, though the urge to unleash was locked away, it was still simmering, waiting to burst at any moment. 

Vespera questioned her morality, should she come to terms of what has happened to her and try and move on? In her vulnerable, mind, she couldn't quite let go, not yet, she needed something to put her mind at ease. The truth is the female found that she collects herself better when she is alone, for that was the way it was all her life and has found a coping mechanism for her troubles. She felt calmer, but she didn't know how long it would last. She had brought the last of her offerings into a pile, some of them were fresh, but some had days on them, but were still good to eat. She piled her prey into a small pile by nudging it with her nose. She was about to make the call when her mind flipped on her because she remembered her scar, the scar that reminded her of the attempt on her own life. It was now permanent, and there was nothing she could do to hide it, questions will be asked, and she wouldn't know how to answer them without lashing and letting her emotions take hold. The scar was healed but would remain a reminder of what she tried to do to herself. The damage was on her right eye so she turned away so that only the left side of her face was showing, she sat on her haunches and collected herself as her heart beat faster and faster with every passing moment. She couldn't postpone it any longer, and with the dip of her muzzle to shooting up into the air with a howl that broke the air, she had done it. Vespera's howl rang in her ears, and her heart felt like it was going to burst out of her chest. "C'mon Vespera, you can do this," she told herself in a whisper, but she doubted herself. She sat with her hiding her right face and looking down on the ground with her prey pile built, she was ready for her consequences.

Valette was still frail from the lack of food she had for a long time. Small prey seemed to be returning, along with the first flocks of deer but her strength was far from enough to hunt bigger game. She was glad that prey was at last returning still she would go into the winter with no fat layer and even though her winter fur it was clear that she had lost a lot of weight. Her winter fur was not as thick or shiny as she liked but that came with a period of lack of food.

A howl reached her ears. Vespera. Valette heart skipped a beat so she was still alive? Where had she been? Valette made her way to the border, her stomach growling but she pushed it away. She would give others food before herself since she wanted her packmates to be strong. She approached and saw Vespera and then... the pile of food. Valette's mouth was watering at the sight. "Vespera," she let out. "Where were you?," she asked. "Are you well?," she added as she stepped closer to the female.

Her own howl rang hollow in her ears and felt that she was committing a terrible deed to herself by summoning one of the wolves that betrayed her. Vespera desperately wanted to leave and just leave the prey pile where it was and flee from the scene, but her heart was urging her to stay. The young girl felt frozen in her spot, her paws rooted into the ground. She was the one who ultimately made the decision to come back, but why? Perhaps it was because she was craving something more than vengeance, but she put that thought in the back of her mind and ignored it. The dark female kept her gaze glued to the ground, she didn't want to see Valette, she didn't want to see her judgemental gaze. But her ears snapped up when she heard the sound of approaching paws, her heart stopped for only a second, she didn't dare use her nose to try and recognize the incoming scent. The paws were fast approaching, but she didn't dare look, she really hoped it was someone else but she wasn't so lucky. 

The Matriarch had arrived.

Vespera felt her heart skip a beat, the Matriarch of Easthollow called out her name and asked where she was and if she was well which did surprise her. The young female reluctantly moved her only visible eye to Valette, and when looking upon the woman, her heart sank and a look of slight guilt appeared on her face. Valette looked as if she hadn't eaten in weeks, her matted winter fur only made her feel worse. But she averted her eyes from her, she looked down at her paws as her ears slightly moving back in shame, her pent up anger seemed to simmer temporarily. She opened her jaws to speak but nothing came out, what could she say? She thoughtfully blinked, she took a deep breath and sighed, "I'm fine, looks like you have seen better days," she chuckled but she quickly turned her face serious. The female didn't say where she had been, she wanted to avoid that question as much as she could so she averted her eyes to noticing Valette drooling at her prey pile.

Without hesitation, the female rose to her paws and turned her body towards the prey pile, her scar on her right eye was now visible. She stood behind the prey pile and dipped her crown and used her muzzle to shove it forward with bits of prey falling as it moved. "Here," she prompted as she lifted her muzzle to meet Valette's hazel gaze, forgetting that she was revealing her scar. "You guys need this more than I do," she stated simply, she truly felt bad for leaving them like this, but the twisted hatred she was feeling for the two leaders of Easthollow caused her to lose a bit of empathy.

Valette's ears fell back when the rather harsh comment of Vespera reached her. It was not very nice to comment on her appearance. The matriarch knew she wasn't looking her best but at least she was doing everything in her power to save this pack. "I've been doing all I can to keep everyone fed," she returned, a slight frown on her brows. She knew Vespera was never one of the most tactical verbally but still. She had expressed concern instead of scolding her.

When the female moved, Valette suddenly saw her eye. She blinked. What had happened to her? "You don't look so good either," she couldn't help but respond and gave her a bit of a look. After all, Vespera started this. Though it was kind of her to give the food. Valette eagerly stepped closer. It was a lot of food. She wished she could call the pack but then it might scare Vespera off. She was not going to be ungrateful or proud and not take it from her. "Vespera what happened? Why did you leave? I don't understand we gave you a good home, right?" Valette had always been keen on giving Vespera a good home, she knew she and greyback weren't the best of friends but not something to leave them for. "Thank you for the food."

`She should have figured that the Matriarch wouldn't like her snarky comments during this point in time. Vespera felt a bit guilty that Valette told her that she has been doing her best to keep everyone fed as if that wasn't obvious for Valette didn't look good at all. The female dipped her muzzle in an apologetic matter, "I'm sorry that Easthollow has been struggling," she murmured, she truly felt bad, but those feelings twisted with her hatred so she didn't know what to think anymore.

But Valette had to ask the question.

Why did she leave? Why did she leave when Easthollow gave her a good home?

Those words struck a chord with her, one of shame and remorse. She darted her eyes away from the Matriarch, how would she answer? She came back to Easthollow to get an explanation as to why Valette turned her back on her at the moment that she needed her the most. She needed an explanation as to why her sorry excuse for a mate thought he was so entitled to Valette's affection alone. Vespera knew she had to get these feelings out, but in her time of isolation and knew that her words couldn't come out explosive or aggressive. The young girl closed her eyes and sighed, she hoped this would have calmed her nerves enough for when she would reopen her eyes and express her emotions.

The young female's gaze fell on Valette with a bit of intensity, "what is a home that doesn't uphold its own values?" She didn't come out snarky or sarcastic, she didn't snap, and she didn't whine. This is one of the rare occasions where she asked and honest question, and she wasn't going to sugar coat it. The Easthollow female had just enough trust left for the Matriarch that she could get an answer, maybe one that didn't fit in her imagination of how Valette would react. Her gaze never left Valette, her gaze was stern but not harsh, she predicted she would get a tongue lashing so she mentally prepared herself for those consequences by keeping her temper as low as possible.

Valette could hear the genuine tones but she never understood why Vespera had to be so harsh all the time. The female sighed and just nodded softly. When she asked why Vespera left she didn't answer the way Valette would expect. Valette looked surprised for a moment and then frowned not understanding what she questioned. "What do you mean? Did I break a value?"

Valette wasn't aware of what she had done, or what Vespera was mad at. "If I did something then I am unaware of what I did," she returned honestly to the female. Valette was confused ass he always tried to be there for everyone in the pack also for Vespera.

What do you mean you aren't aware of what you did? Didn't your sorry excuse for a mate tell you anything? Oh, of course, he didn't, he just wants to smoother up to you for his own ego and power! Vespera angrily thought with her muscles tensing up as her claws began to slowly scrape the ground with deep gashes. But she recollected herself, was Valette truly to blame? The young female lowered her muzzle a bit in deep thought as she blinked slowly, she had to remember that Leta's life was on the line so of course, Valette would focus on her safety rather than Vespera's personal predicament.

But that still doesn't change what happened, no matter how many excuses she tried to come up for the Matriarch.

The dark female drew back a deep sigh, her eyes closing to with her chest rising and falling, how would she word this? She opened her gaze and lifted her muzzle to meet Valette's confused glance, "I just want to know why, why did you leave me when I needed you most?" Her sentence came out like her voice was breaking and she was about to form tears, but she didn't, her eyes squinted with her brows slightly curved and her ears moved slightly back. She figured she would leave Valette more confused so she added more to her statement, "I know your kin is more important... But... You are important to me, I have so much respect for you... and what had happened shouldn't have occurred, I would never wish so much pain on someone. But you left me, you left me under his torment, his punishment, why did I deserve it? What did I do? Is comforting someone you love and respect a crime? I thought this was family." Her voice was starting to crack under the pressure and she felt her heartbeat rapidly increase with every word she uttered.

She wanted to forget it, but she couldn't, she felt lied to.

"So I am not allowed to show signs of grief and sorrow and comfort? Am I only reduced to the sidelines? What is a family that doesn't let others comfort each other? What is a family that punishes mourning?" She drew back a gasp and stepped back a bit and sat on her haunches with her body slightly shaking and her breathing short with exhaustion. Vespera swallowed and tipped her muzzle down to the ground, her vision was starting to become blurry with tears but she tried to blink them away. "I couldn't stay... If I had remained on this territory, then I could only promise an outburst that I didn't want you to see..." The female mumbled, not even looking at Valette, "I didn't want to hurt anyone... So I tried to take matters into my own paws... In more ways than one..." That last line stung for the memories of her suicide attempt flowed through her mind, the urge to take her own life felt so right to her, she didn't care if others were affected by it.

Valette was so confused as Vespera started talking. The matriarch felt like she was missing a few chapters of a book and tried to understand the later works. "Vespera I honestly didn't know you were suffering so badly. You are quite good at hiding your feelings and I wouldn't want to push you too far out of your comfort zone," she spoke. It was clear she wasn't trying to excuse herself but she was honestly just trying to understand it all. Vespera continued about a 'him'. She stepped closer to her and looked at her with a sad expression. She didn't want Vespera to feel any pain. "I don't understand, Vespera. You are part of our family and I don't understand where it went wrong? Who is him? What did he do to you to make you so upset?"

Valette didn't know when Vespera wasn't allowed to mourn or when she was pushed to the sidelines. It had been a long time since she had been so far out of the loop. "What you are describing isn't something that I would say is Easthollow. Easthollow is the opposite. Vespera will you please tell me what happened and why you feel this way because I don't know about any of this." Valette tried to reason with the female, trying to see what went wrong and if she could still get some justice for Vespera.

Then she spoke about an outburst that she didn't want Valette to see, which again, hiding with the emotions and somehow she was suppose to know when Vespera needed her? Valette had a slight frown on her face when the words finally settled. "Wait, so-- Wait, that time we found you injured.... You did that to yourself?," Valette asked her confusion even growing further. It was clear that alpha female was completely lost.

Valette expressed that she didn't know that Vespera was suffering so much, she also commented that the female was an expert on hiding emotions to which the female could only blame herself. The Matriarch was only asking questions to get a better picture of what Vespera was trying to express, but those questions only made her prickle with annoyance for she figured that she was giving off the right hints. The Easthollow female's eyes laid onto Valette with firmness, she wanted to get the message across, so she wouldn't sugarcoat her words anymore. "That bastard Greyback, the only one who seems to have a problem with me," just uttering his name made her wrinkle her nose in disgust, if she was the family that Valette claimed that she was a part of, then he is the stepfather that wants nothing to do with his kids. "Yeah, he seems to forget that a lot, he really does embody the role Patriarch," Vespera added with a bit of sarcasm, but her expression was painted with hurt, her eyebrows knitted and her ears slightly folded back.

More like a fucking dictator.

Valette wanted to tell her what happened, but she didn't want to remember. However, in order to get her feelings truly across, she had to comply, so she breathed in a slow breath with her eyes closed. She so badly wanted to lash out in despair and hatred, yet that would only put her back to square one, so she exhaled with and even rhythm and opened her eyes to look at Valette's green gaze. "What happened with Leta and that black-headed bitch shouldn't have happened... In more ways than one, it pained me to see what happened to her and what you had to go through... I have run into the lowest of the low in my time so far, and I didn't want you to share that seem pain... So I just wanted to let you know that... You aren't alone and I can relate more than you think... but..." Her muscles tensed up, she felt like she was going to burst a vein, the flashbacks came flooding in and the damn in her mind broke.

"But apparently I cannot grieve with you because that is such a crime now!" Her eyes flashed with fury, "Your mate is apparently the only one who is entitled to you that I get attacked just because I wanted to mourn! To be there for you! Because you were there for me! I wanted to show you that I am capable of feeling, capable of more than what I had become, but I guess not..." Vespera's body started to shake a bit with pain and hurt, her gaze revealed so much distraught as she explained her struggle.

"So after that experience... I felt like I had nowhere else to go, I felt like I was cursed to run into these dead ends... So I felt I had no option left... and that's how this scar came..." She turned her head slightly so that Valette could see the scar on her right more, "But he denied me any peace, I guess he just didn't want me to die on his territory, he probably wouldn't give two shits if I died elsewhere." Her voice started to die out and crack, the pain and suffering that she had experienced had caused her such grief and trauma that she just wanted to collapse and cry.

But she stood. She stood with what dignity she had left. Vespera looked at Valette, she wondered what excuse she would come up with for her disgusting mate.

Valette was quite shocked to hear that she was talking about Greyback. But what had Greyback done to her? She seemed so upset. Valette listened quietly even though she did call her mate a bastard and call him out that he wasn't really being a Patriarch. Valette was confused as to why she would think so ill of the man that she loved, that only showed how kind and loving he was. She had a hard time picturing it.

Then Vespera started to explain. It happened during Leta's attack. Her face softened when Vespera spoke about her pain and how she didn't want her to feel that pain. That was the moment that even she had bitten away from her until Greyback had been at her side. "Do you also remember that in that moment, I bit Greyback for coming too close to me?," she spoke. She didn't want to excuse Greyback and it wasn't an excuse for him. "I was blind with grief if you had come close I might have bitten you as well," she pointed out, she was not proud of that moment. But still, would Vespera then have been this angry at her for biting her?

Vespera always had a dramatic flair about her, but Valette was not telling her that. Valette stepped closer. "Your intentions were good in that moment, Vespera. But in that moment of trauma my reaction went back to the most basic of instincts and that was protect my baby from everyone around, even from my mate. I remember how I just bit and snarled at every shape that came too near for my liking. I could have hurt you even with your good intentions," she explained, how she experienced the trauma of Leta getting injured. "But it is important to know that I wouldn't mean such things. Would you have been mad at me the way you are mad at Greyback if I would have bitten you in my rage of emotions?"

Vespera had continued about how she had to take matters in her own hand. With her own dispair of feeling alone. She wished that Vespera wouldn't have done such drastic things. Valette wished she could have been there for Vespera but in that moment she had her own crisis. And now she understood why Vespera's hurt had gone over her head. She had been busy with Leta who had been close to dying. Valette lightly tilted her head. "So you are mad Greyback saved you?," she asked, confused once more. She wanted to say that Greyback wasn't like that but she knew that it would not be heard by Vespera.

"I think he would run day and night when he would hear you are in danger. But you would probably disagree with me," she sighed. That was the problem between Vespera and Greyback. Her mate was authoritative and very wolf like in his behavior and corrections. Valette loved that about him. A bite or a growl was common to hear from him but it was nothing personal, but Vespera had not been taught though cues. She was far more emotional in al her reactions. Valette felt that everything Greyback did would end up taking wrongly by the female.

"I am not going to excuse Greyback's behavior. You are hurt and your anger is not for nothing. But if you have such anger towards him how do you see yourself living here with the man you hate so much? And no Vespera before you start. I don't want you gone. You are part of our family. I just want you to think about if you would be in Easthollow, in our family, would you be able to live with Greyback? Would you be willing to talk to him about what happened?" Valette had been stepping closer to her to offer her that comfort if she needed it. "May I remind you that family is about forgiving each other," she added softly. Vespera had a lot to learn about family life, and this could be a wise lesson.

Novel :'D

omgggg your writing ;-;

Valette spoke about how she snapped at everyone that came near Leta, even Greyback, the Matriarch said she was blinded with grief which was an emotion she was too familiar with. The woman remarked how she would have bitten her as well, but Vespera was aware that she could have in that moment of trial, and she was willing to take the risk just so that Valette could know she would be there for her. The young girl didn't respond to her statement, she kept looking at her with a grim gaze, she was going to let Valette make her case, the refute any statement she found untrue or in need of further explanation. Valette stepped closer to Vespera but she was unphased, she knew that the woman was going to get closer to prove her point that she was trying to sympathize with her, but she started to question if she was just covering up for her mistake.

Well nothing is going to make me change my mind, she thought bitterly, she wouldn't let any hateful treatment be excused.

The Matriarch went on about the situation with Leta, she was going to into detail on how her instincts kicked in and she needed to protect her child to which Vespera could only agree with. Though she may never experience those maternal instincts, she could understand when others would go into that setting. But she also put the cherry on top by saying that her intentions were good, at least she knew that she wasn't wrong, so why couldn't Greyback understand that? These questions were only fueling her anger, and she was ready to counter Valette. But then she hit her with a question, a question that had the situation flipped.

Would she hold the same hatred for Valette if she had committed that violent act?

"No," the answer came more quickly than she anticipated, in fact, it was more on instinct, but she figured that she would need to explain. "Because I know you Val, I know that you wouldn't want to intentionally hurt me, I know that in your heart, you wouldn't do it out of jealousy or hatred." Vespera held her gaze at the woman, her eyes only showed certainty, she was confident in her answer even if the Matriarch would disagree. "I wouldn't be as mad, though I would admit, I would still be upset, but you have earned my respect through patience and kindness, Greyback has not. He hasn't done anything to earn the status of Patriarch for me, and that will hold true until he does." The girl's expression was that of judgment, she would be the one to individually decide if Greyback was a worthy leader, and so far he has done nothing to impress her.

Valette still looked confused as to what she meant that Greyback had saved her, she could feel a vein wanting to burst but she restrained herself from exploding. "Yes, I am, I wanted to fix all my sins in one final act, but I suppose I can't, I wanted to go to a place to where I was truly happy, even if I had to take my own life." Vespera thought of her actions as noble and continued, "I didn't want you to suffer with me as it seems all I do is cause problems, I thought that you shouldn't waste your time with a disappointment like me so I took it upon myself to remove this imperfection." Her expression remained, but of course when she said 'this,' she meant herself. Vespera would admit that she was being a bit dramatic but this is what she truly felt, Valette would of course rebuttal the idea that Greyback only saved her to cause more harm by stating that he would run day and night for her.

Bullshit.

"I'm sorry, but I do have to disagree with you," she stated with a flat tone but with a hint of annoyance. Valette said that she wouldn't excuse Greyback's behavior but her expression started to show signs of doubt but she said nothing. Then the Matriarch started to speak of something Vespera deemed outrageous, she opened her mouth to object but Valette was quick to silence her. The woman put in that she wasn't asking her to leave but asked if she was willing to live with the man, and even talk with him, the female's eyes almost popped out of her head, she wanted to laugh at that statement. Vespera collected herself, her eyes were filled with bewilderment, "talk with him? I doubt that he would be able to hold up a civil conversation, he would only scold me, tell me that I'm a delinquent, and wouldn't own up to anything at all." She went into a bit of a sarcastic chuckle, but she put her ears forward and gave Valette a more professional look. The Matriarch went on about forgiveness, oh boy, here comes the cheese, she wanted to gag, but she didn't change her face. The Alpha was had come closer to her, the aura she gave off would only make Vespera's eyes slightly soften, she couldn't be angry forever when Valette was in her presence.

Her agitated nerves calmed a bit, she started to think about forgiving the man, but did he truly deserve it? Would those words mean nothing if he doesn't own up to anything and change his attitude? Her mind was pouring with doubt but she would entertain the Matriarch, "I don't know, I don't trust that anything will change, I am trying to change my ways, but it seems he can't do the same. Trust is a two-way streak, I am not going to surrender myself to him and he goes off Scott free, I know that you don't excuse any of his actions and probably think I am unwilling to give him a chance, but did he give me a chance? I am not some zombie minded follower, if I see something that I disagree with, then I will speak my mind on it, but it seems he can't handle someone else's opinion." The girl spoke with a rebellious tone, she wasn't going to fall to him so easily, "I want to believe you Valette, I really do, I came to Easthollow because of your leadership, you were willing to give me a home and you were patient with me, and I could never ask for more." She let a small smile form on her lips and her gaze was filled with compassion for the Matriarch, "I just don't think he has that same kind of patience you do, you are willing to listen to me, and I can only be grateful."

Vespera was starting to release the hatred she had for Valette, and it manifested into warmth, but there was still a large hole, a void, "I don't think I can mend my relationship with him at this point, no matter how hard I try it seems that he will have hatred towards me, and that will stay the same with me." She said with a sigh and the utmost of honesty, for if she did try it would only end up in disaster and Valette would have to save her again. "I guess I am just going to have to accept that..." The female mumbled, she wasn't going to let the Patriarch walk all over her, but she was beginning to be okay with the fact that they might never see eye-to-eye on anything.

And nothing was probably ever going to fix that.

oof my novel :'D

Valette listened to all of it. How Vespera didn't agree with her, that when she would have bitten her that she would be upset or would understand. What if it was the same for Greyback? Why did she have to hate him. Vespera continued that Greyback did not earn that same respect and Valette wondered why as the male had been so galant with her. He felt he had offered the same to Vespera. He had told her to train with her at dawn. She did remember that. There was some scolding but Vespera's wolf behavior was sometimes different than how Easthollow handled things.

She continued with how she wanted to kill herself. Valette felt her stomach turn when Vespera talked that way about herself. So that was the first thing that Valette spoke about. "You said that you didn't want to feel the hurt when I thought I lost Leta. But did you ever think that you would make me go through that same hurt once more if you would have killed yourself. If you were successful?," she stated to the female. Wondering if Vespera had thought about it in that way. "We talked about this Vespera. I told you before not to talk about yourself that way."

Valette exhaled sharply before she continued. "Easthollow isn't under my sole leadership anymore. Greyback leads with me. You cannot respect one of the two leaders, it won't work. You even speak of not believing that Greyback will change. That is why I asked, how do you see yourself living in Easthollow if you cannot bear to live with the one that leads with me," she spoke to the female. She didn't want Vespera gone but she had to understand that she couldn't just disrespect Greyback and not get called out on it.

"You seem to see yourself as a disappointment, and someone who does everything wrong. You have a certain image of yourself and you cannot seem to see another perspective. Could it be that you have a wrong image of Greyback as well? Have you ever talked to him about this? Told him how you feel? Maybe tell him that you feel worthless and if he says something negative it will make you feel bad? You are so closed off and respond a certain way, but Greyback is stubborn to and reacts a certain way. It will always clash if you don't talk to him," she stated. Valette's eyes hardened a bit.

"If you want to stay I want you to talk to Greyback. I will be there but I want you two to talk. I don't like conflict in my pack. If he doesn't know what is bothering you, then he won't change since he most likely won't know what to change around you," she stated. "I am going to play this card but you said you wanted to learn what is like to live in a family, and that is also solving conflicts and learning how to deal with them instead of running away and killing yourself," she spoke and looked at Vespera with a mournful expression. "I'm sorry I have to, otherwise you will always be avoiding conflict."

Vespera felt that she had held her word in what she believed, she wasn't going to let her mind be swayed so quickly. The Easthollow girl wanted to make it clear that she wasn't going to let this man walk all over her and order her about just because he has the title of Patriarch. That's all he is, a title, she growled to herself, with her violet orbs still on the listening Matriarch, she would hope that the woman would see it her way.

But that wasn't the case at all, in fact, it was the opposite.

Valette retorted at her by stating if Vespera thought about if killing herself would affect Valette, or did she even think of it at all. The female began being flooded with guilt, she thought that she had explained it to her but she really did think about her actions. "I just thought it would be best, I didn't want to cause any more trouble," the female started to lose confidence in her words with her ears tilting back a bit like a slight sign of shame. But Valette was far from done, she refuted every point she made and made it clear that she wouldn't let any of this nonsense go on for any longer and in fact scolded her for thinking down about herself. Vespera's eyes grew a bit wide and her eyebrows tilted up a bit, every word stung like she was getting disciplined by her own mother.

The young girl felt her mouth glued shut as Valette continued, she was trying to find an opening to her statement but every chance she got Valette would continue. The Matriarch made it clear that Greyback leads with her and it will stay that way for a long time, and Vespera felt her heart race and her face get hot with anger. She so desperately wanted to retort but she realized she would only dig herself deeper so she stayed silent. Valette was ripping into her that her perception of herself was wrong and her attitude about it has affected her viewpoints of others, she might have misjudged Greyback. This statement made the girl scowl, so far the man had done nothing to change her view on him, but she already explained that so she once again remained silent.

Valette had ordered her to talk with Greyback or else the conflict would never be solved, the girl darted her eyes away and looked at the ground with a sour look on her face. But even she knew that this couldn't be avoided forever, she folded her ears back for she was contemplating if she wanted to talk with him or not. Valette said that she would monitor the conversation, this did spike her interest because Greyback seemed to know his place when Val was around. Vespera lifted her head to meet Valette's gaze, her face was mournful and this only soften Vespera's heart, she couldn't let Valette down like she did so many times. The girl closed her eyes and sighs, she then reopened her eyes and held her head up with a more stern expression, "fine, I will try to talk with him, but if he tries anything, I will not let myself be pinned down by him a second time." Her tone was firm and clear, the girl will let it be known that she will rebel if something goes South and she will act upon her instincts to preserve herself and not let the man make her a victim again.

And she won't hold back this time.

Valette shook her head lightly at the female. "You may think it would be best, but I would have mourned for you, in fact. I did. When you vanished," she explained to the female. She hoped that those words would make her realize that she had a family that cared for her. She knew that for certain. Vespera stayed silent but her face said enough. Valette just knew she had to discipline as well as give love to Vespera. The younger female deserved so much love but there had to be moments where she would need to learn as well.

"Thank you, Vespera. This is a good step in the right direction." Alright, lets get his over with then. She tipped her head back and howled to @Greyback. Vespera probably wouldn't expect her to call Greyback to the scene right away, but Valette was not going to give Vespera any excuse. She wanted to have this solved now. She couldn't help but smile softly at Vespera. "Don't worry you will both get your own corner and you two will just talk." She assured the female.

Greyback was quick to answer the call of his mate. Her song so unique it was impossible to mistake.

He never took his time coming to her, and arrived shortly after with a relaxed gate and a soft smile. Until he saw Vespera, that was. The Patriarch arched a brow at the scene, looking between the two of them with a critical brow. He knew the girl had recently returned to the lands, but hadn't taken it upon himself to welcome her back. he air between the two of them had never been the best, but regardless, he soon shot her a friendly smile and made his way beside his mate, nosing at her cheek briefly as a welcoming.

"I certainly didn't expect this. Why do you call for me, my love. Has something happened?" He looked to Vespera once more taking in her new wound that stretched across her face. He hadn't known what transpired after the incident, he had assumed she fled in fear.

The woman's guilt started to manifest on her face when Valette said that she had mourned her, her eyes looked down at her paws in shame. Vespera thought that she was doing right when she would take her own life so that others could be happy with her gone but that wouldn't be the case. The girl thought herself as selfish that she underestimated the feelings that Valette would have and she scolded herself for it silently. The Matriarch thanked Vespera for cooperating so that this conflict would be resolved, she only grunted in response and was about to make her exit so that she could think of what to say.

But Valette did the unthinkable.

The Matriarch's howl broke the air and rang in Vespera's ears, this startled the girl so much that she froze like an antelope in headlights. She didn't just do that, please for the love of everything holy please tell me that she didn't just do that. The Easthollow wolf looked at her with wide eyes and her ears perked forward with alarm, "Hey wait for a second! You didn't even give a chance to prepare!" Her voice sounded desperate, she wanted to run away so badly but she figured Valette would chase her down and drag her back to have this important conversation. Vespera felt her heart thump against her chest, the hatred she had for the man manifested into fear, she wasn't so good about talking out her feelings to wolves she didn't trust. 

The Matriarch looked at her with a soft smile and said that she would get her own corner for the discussion, Vespera returned her an internally screaming face, "Oh thanks, I'm so glad that you are being considerate," she said through her teeth with her usual sarcasm. Her eyes darted to where Greyback could come from, she didn't want to face the male just yet, in fact, she didn't want to face him at all.

But he came, in all of his stupid glory self.

He asked if something was wrong with Valette, and he soon looked at her. Vespera looked directly into his eyes and didn't say a word, she was frozen and just blinked at him. She felt her eyebrows knit at him just slightly but she still looked mostly unprepared more than anything.

Valette arched a brow at the female. She knew Vespera well enough to know that she would probably avoid it at all cost hence why she would make use of their time now to do instead of say. "Sweety, your anger is only going to fester and even if you prepare the other will always answer differently than you think," she pointed out. She knew. How often she tried to prepare for difficult conversations and they never ended how she thought they would. She called on her experience for this one. At Vespera's sarcastic comment she just gave her a dashing smile in return.

Greyback came and Valette had to swoon a bit when he walked up to her. Her eyes almost turned into hearts but she reminded herself that she was not on Greyback's side today, not on anyone's side. "Yes, I just heard Vespera doesn't like you and thinks you cannot change," she explained coolly to her mate. "In which I returned to her that if she doesn't talk to you about what she dislikes you cannot change or know about it," she added. Valette turned to to Vespera who was probably going to hate it that she told this but in this moment she didn't care.

Valette stood and looked at her mate. "Sit," she told him. She then moved so she was standing in the middle and moved her eye to Vespera. "You too.". Valette didn't stand between them, they were at a good distance for talking and she was just being the mediator here. 'No yelling, snarling or growling. No interrupting each other," she spoke strictly. Her gaze turned a bit softer. "Okay, Vespera, why don't you tell Greyback how he made you feel. Don't tell him what he has done, but how his actions made you feel." Since Valette had no need for an accusing contest. Then again, she believed her mate to be calm and probably would understand this would be mostly for Vespera. For her to learn.

Greyback blinked at the information thrown with him, and for a moment he glanced to Valette with raised brows and a pursed lip. As if to ask "what the hell was this?" However, what he got was certainly not what he was hoping as he was commanded to sit.

Her authoritative tone made his body drop without a second thought, and he soon found himself on the other side of Vespera, his mate in between. So this was a.... therapy session? The man wanted to huff, he didn't have time for this. He had to prepare the new recruits and remark the border. This could surely wait another day, right?

He looked to Vespera with his usual stone expression, waiting for her to explain her side. He knew the girl held distaste for him, but never attempted to patch it up, thinking it would be a lost cause.

Vespera didn't take her eyes off him as Valette did the talking for her by stating that she didn't like him and didn't sugar coat anything. The female felt a pool of sweat drip down her legs, she really wasn't prepared for this confrontation for the Matriarch made what seemed to be a snarky comment about how her anger and her preparedness. The girl darted a look at Valette for only a second but she then swiftly looked back at Greyback, she was going to study his every move and his every expression, his every little muscle twitch. Valette ordered the man to sit to which he responded without a second thought and plopped down onto his hind legs, the girl thought of this as amusing for some odd reason because the big oaf followed her direct order faster than a blink of an eye. The woman ordered Vespera to sit too but she found herself to sit down uncomfortably slow with her head glued into once place, she was determined not to take her eyes off of the man.

The Patriarch didn't say anything, he just returned her with a stone gaze, Valette prompted her to go first and she felt put on the spot and froze up. Vespera felt like she was frozen in time and tried to think of what to say, there was so much she could spit at him and roast him here and now, but Valette was there, so she couldn't. Her purple gaze was that of judgment, her eyes narrowed a bit more and her shocked face was starting to turn into a slight scowl. My feelings, to HIM? Yea just watch this dumpster fire go down... She thought to herself in a snarky way, but she kept that thought silent, she figured that she was more mature and grown-up at this point so she could break down Greyback in a professional way. With her own stone gaze meeting his, she breathed in and exhaled slowly, this was an attempt to calm her nerves but nothing changed so she was still the ticking time bomb she was.

"Well, where do I begin?" She lifted her eyebrows and her voice was flat, "I fff...." Vespera wheezed, she was about to go into her sentence but something stopped her, her heart was holding her back, she didn't want to say anything that would make her vulnerable. "Excuse me..." She muttered and cleared her throat, this is so stupid, I'm sure we all got better things to do... She rolled her eyes and sighed again "I feel," she finally began with her opening up her muzzle wider then she should have, "that I have been wrongly treated by you annnndddddd," She dragged out her words and looked over to Valette with a pleading look, she wasn't very good at this. But she knew Valette wouldn't help so she closed her eyes and drew a short breath, she turned her head towards Greyback and opened up her eyes once again with her gaze unamused and bored, "and that it wasn't fair and unjust and if this is supposed to be a family then we should treat each other as such." She kept her expression firm, she was starting to reveal a face of doubt, she believed this wouldn't work and this was a waste of her time.

Valette knew that Greyback might not like this but she hoped he would understand. Otherwise she would have to explain him after this. Vespera started and it was as unclear as she had expected it to be. The female slowly nodded. "Alright, good start, but perhaps you can tell when he made you feel like that. Now it sounds very generic and Greyback might not know that he made you feel that way," she offered to the female.

She glanced at her mate and offered him a smile. "Did you know? Or what are your views on the matter?," she asked her mate. Perhaps it was good to have him talking as well. "I know that Vespera has made you feel frustrated as well. Or has that been resolved?," she pointed out, she had been throwing Vespera's feelings out in the open so perhaps it was good that she would reveal Greyback's as well. She was pretty sure some kisses and talk of their next litter would make him less upset with her after this conversation.

Greyback watched as the girl gazed at him. Her expression might have been struggling to remain calm, but the man knew better and could see the hatred that swirled in her iris. And just as she stared at him, he stared back with an unwavering gaze. His honey-amber gaze raking over her in a silent challenge. He would not allow this girl to question him and his authority.

He remained calm and silent as she spoke, her words warbled as she clearly battled with expressing her feelings. He was surprised once more, to see something such as that coming from a brash girl certainly was out of place in the man's mind. But just as Valette commented, she was correct. Greyback did not know entirely what the girl meant.

"I knew of our tension," he stated, his voice monotone and bland. "Since the girl's arrival our views have been quite contrasting. I figured when Vespera fled that it would be the end of it. But seeing as how she came back, and your news about her... less that unbecoming feelings towards me i'd say that no, It hasn't been resolved."

Greyback was a bit surprised that Valette revealed his past transgressions towards the girl, but he was not ashamed. He made his feelings known in the past and still stood by them.

Vespera was met with a challenging gaze, Oh no you don't, your authority doesn't mean shit now, She met his challenging gaze with her own, she was able to seal away her own emotions and her uncertainty became confidence. The girl kept her intensity up for the man started to speak, he began talking about how he was aware of the tension between them and how he thought it had ended there when she left. This only pissed her off even more and she was starting to lose her cool, "sorry to disappoint you, but I am here now, and I don't think I am going to be leaving anytime soon," her voice was flat, she managed to tuck away her snark but she could feel herself slipping into her brash ways. The Patriarch continued but his words fell on deaf ears, to her, he didn't sound like he was apologetic at all.

I knew it, she thought bitterly to herself, this is just a waste of my fucking time!

Vespera figured that she would have to give some context of what she meant, and she would be glad to rip into him, however, she didn't, her angry feelings morphed into a bit of grief. The girl's gaze softened "Look, as I told Valette, that whole situation with Leta shouldn't have happened, and I hope that bitch rots in hell for what she did," and you should go with her, she wanted to add but she kept her mouth shut. "I  feel the pain of having a family member attacked, more than you know, I don't want anyone sharing the same pain as I did, but I guess I am not allowed to share those mourning feelings." Her gaze grew hard again as she spoke her last few words and her blood started to boil for she could feel her agitation prickle up her spine. She hated him for what he did, and she hated him more that he didn't look like he was going to let his guard down a bit and get real with her. 

This man still had the look of a dictator to her, and she would let him know through her expression that she still thought of him as such.

Valette watched as Greyback started to talk, his expression was cold towards Vespera. When she glanced at the youngster she wasn't really backing down either. Valette's brows raised when Vespera mentioned that she wasn't going to leave soon. However, Valette didn't want to packmembers to have severe tension with each other.

Vespera continued but still wasn't very clear. She spoke about Leta and how she didn't want anyone to feel like they would lose a family member. "But Vespera, why do you feel that you are not allowed to mourn?," Valette asked. She was doing the opposite of what Valette told her to do. Vespera was accusing that she was not allowed to do something instead of talking that she didn't feel like she was allowed to mourn. It was different.

Vespera looked angry at Greyback and Valette just sighed softly. "I don't think Greyback has anything against you mourning. Why are you so angry with him? What did he do exactly what hurt you so deeply? You can look sour and angry all you want but it won't solve anything. Now talk," Valette spoke, because she would let them sit here.

Valette—bless her soul, was trying her best to be the middle wolf and encourage the girl to talk. Greyback saw this, and appreciate it. Giving her a worried smile before shaking his head. This was useless, and it wasn't going anywhere. He hoped Valette saw this as he chose to disregarded the sour tone in the dark wolf. "Perhaps I should share my.... view on things, yes?"

He settled a bit more into his spot, getting comfortable without slouching over. As always, the Patriarch held himself in a proper posture. "Vespera, you are nearly three, yes? Well past the age of pup-hood and deep into your adult years." He gaze squinted lightly as he spoke. "As Patriarch it is my duty to protect the pack, to help it function, to move us forward. But your constant disregard for the order of things around here has gone on long enough." His voice was getting deeper now, veering into the territory of giving an order more than expressing feelings. "I will no longer stand for you missing our hunts—putting the lives of others in danger with your over-zealousness when you choose to appear. Sneaking off into the unknown and avoiding others when you aren't getting snippy with them."

His glare was cold now, and he was beginning to rise up to his full stature on four paws. Looming over the girl, casting a shadow down upon her and Valette. "If you cannot obey the order and dedicate yourself to Easthollow then perhaps you are more suited to be a lone wolf."

Vespera looked at Valette, who was trying to get the conversation started since the girl wasn't that clear with what she was saying. The female sighed, and looked at the man with a bit of a softer look, she felt more confident that Valette was there to steer the conversation. "What I mean is, I just feel like when you attacked me when I was trying to comfort Valette, it was unfair, it was unjust." Vespera kept her firm and steady gaze at the Patriarch, her eyes showed full confidence in what she was saying, "that is why I am accusing you of not letting me mourn, now I know you are going to say something like 'it wasn't your place to' or whatever, but here is the thing." The Easthollow girl continued to stare, but not an aggressive matter, in fact, she looked like she was about to give a claim in a court case.

"I have to be in a place in order to mourn? Am I not allowed to relate to your mate in times of grief? Am I only restricted to the sidelines like I always have been? When I try to express my feelings to others and let them know I am here, it is a crime now?" Her tone was calm, surprisingly, her intention wasn't to be snippy or snarky at all, for once, she was just trying to get some answers, "I'm sorry I tried doing something that you are not used to seeing, it was new for me too." She admitted, looking at Valette, her expression softening, but she turned back to the man with the same determined expression. Valette's next question, ho boy, let's see how he is going to refute this... "I am angry with you because again, you attacked me but maybe Valette would have done the same, but if I am being honest with you," this is all you probably gonna fucking get so clean the cobwebs outta your ears, "it would have hurt less if she had done it because I know Valette, I know she wouldn't have wanted to intentionally hurt me, because like she told me, her instincts were off the wall in wanting to protect her kin from anyone, and she even snapped at you." 

"But you might say something like, well aren't I allowed to wanting to protect my family from everyone else as well? And my answer is, yes, you are, but this is what makes you different." Her gaze started to harden a bit more, "all you have shown me is you want to control, you want power, you say your job is to protect the pack from danger. While that is a noble cause, but putting wolves like me who are a little more... uhm... finicky, if I were to put it into words, with acts of aggression and trying to assert your dominance the old fashioned way, isn't going to work. In fact, if actually tried asking, it just makes us more pissed off and more reluctant to listen. If you REALLY wanted to know why," she started, Vespera was going to reveal something personal, but she figured it would be honorable just in case there was another wolf that was like her coming down the line, that wolf wouldn't have to deal with this dictator, as she did. "I wasn't taught these cues, and when you have lived your whole life running from asshole Alpha's who only care that they have that power, then you kind of get a little mixed up. And my uh..." Her eyes moved slowly down from the Patriarch for they were starting to fill with sadness, "my parents died before they could teach me that..." The girl grew silent, she stayed silent for a bit, she could feel the tears line up in her eyes, but she remembered she was talking to this guy, and she didn't want to show weakness. Vespera shook her head with her tears flying out so that her eyes could dry again and looked back up at Greyback with her once again stern face.

It was Greyback's turn, his turn to start yapping about and flapping his lips, he started by talking about her age, to which her hardened look started to look unamused, he was really talking like an old man, how does Valette put up with this wheezer? That, she will never know, but he continued anyway, he was starting to criticize her for not following orders and always running away from a situation. Vespera turned to Valette, she started to look shocked and her face was starting to show disbelief, he is doing the same fucking thing! He is only criticizing! Can't you see that shit? Fucking hypocrite.... She growled to herself. Greyback then got up on his paws and started to loom over the two females with his statue-like stance. Vespera followed his gaze with her own becoming stone again, she won't let him intimidate her. The Patriarch then said she would really be a lone wolf which struck a chord with the female, she felt her heart rate speed up with anger and her fur rising, but she kept a steady gaze. Do you see Val? This is the kind of shit I was talking about, he does this all the time! Witness the true nature of your mate! But she didn't say anything, she let him get up, she let him talk, she only returned a determined gaze at him. Vespera then got up on her paws to, her head in place with her eyes locked onto him like a cobra, she looked at him for a good long minute, her eyes reading him, he would probably try to assert his stupid dominance but she didn't care. She then opened her jaws to speak, he was probably expecting her to say something snarky and retort.

But she didn't do that.

"you're right I am an adult now, I am not a child anymore, so let me tell you a story since I am old enough to do that now." Her purple orbs were becoming more defiant, "once upon a time, there was a young girl trying to find her way around the world and making peace with her past. She stumbles here in a meadow and decides to sleep there. But then she is woken up by someone, but not just an ordinary someone, but an angel," she was, of course, telling the story of how she met Valette and came into Easthollow, and the angel being Valette. "the girl didn't know how to react to the angel so she gave her teenage attitude and snarky comments to try and take control of the situation and feel better about herself. But the angel was patient, patience that would be considered that of the Gods and she let her speak. The angelic being then smiled at her, a smile that would sooth a bear, she then said that she could give the wandering lone and broken girl a home, A home? That is what she had always wanted! So she followed the angel into her new life, the girl would not forget the kindness the being showed her, after all, the first impressions are important. Even at her weakest moments, the angel would always be patient and listen, even if the girl showed aggression, for when there was a beast to be tamed, the angel will always be there to show the path of healing with patience and kindness." As she was telling that story, she couldn't help but feel warmth for the Matriarch, Valette gave her a chance through her sense of sympathy, she felt her gaze softening through that story for it was a pleasant memory.

But yet again, Vespera didn't have too many of those.

sorry for my essay XD