Sun Mote Copse what you gon' do

After he had said good-bye to Towhee, Eljay hadn't actually found Niamh so far. Admittedly, after he had been unable to find her that day he hadn't pursued it further. He still wanted to talk to Niamh about it, honestly, but then the busy-ness of the day had caught onto him again and he had sorta forgotten; it wasn't easy doing this confronting thing for him, especially when it wasn't made easy because he couldn't find the other side of this conversation.

Rather than searching again that day Eljay decided that he would call for @Niamh. He felt awkward calling -- he usually really just searched for wolves in the territory, rather than howl for them -- but it was a lot more efficient than chasing cold leads ineffectively. Eljay waited close to the garden that he and Weejay (him a bit more than she lately) had upkept before the flooding, but that had been mostly ruined since then, apart from a few tenacious plants that had survived the slosh of water they'd got to process. He felt fidgetty but sat down and waited with what patience he could muster while he practised what he would say in his head time and again while waiting for Niamh.

Niamh had been fishing in the river, which had finally shrun back down to its normal size again, when Eljay had called. There were new deepholes to be investigated, and the banks had been shifted under the weight of the flooding, but the fish seemed to like it. She hadn't spared much time for fishing in the past, but now, with a few new sweet fishing spots along their borders, she found it hard to resist. Fishing took so much less energy than hunting other animals. 

So she was still wet all the way up to her chest when she reached Eljay, having heard her summon and responded to it as swiftly as possible. She was panting softly, and searched with her gaze for anything that ought to worry for her. While she saw Eljay often in passing, it was unusual for him to call for her unless there was a particular reason and her first thought was her kids. Was one of them hurt? None of them were there, so she turned her questioning gaze to him, concern sharpening her gaze. When she saw no others present, she realized that he was in the place where he and Weejay brought plants to grow....And it didn't look so great.

"Woah. The flooding sort of..." She leaned over to sniff at a plant which looked alive, but quite wilted. She sighed; a lot of time had probably been put into planting and growing these plants, only to be torn free by rushing waters, or killed by the saturation. "Sorry. This...You put a lotta time into this. Will they," She said, attempting to perk up a plant (unknowingly having chosen a weed, rather than an actual herb) up by lifting one of its rain-softened leaves up. "Grow back?" She asked. The plant's leaf flopped back down by its stalk, causing Niamh to frown. It wasn't likely why he'd called her here- she'd be as useless in a garden as a lawn gnome would be in a game of pickleball. But she felt she ought to offer some sympathy for the loss of his garden, knowing it was something he cared about.

It helped that he could work on something while he waited and overthought what he would say in his head. He glanced up from the garden a few times when he thought he saw someone, but it was just a bird or a flash of something else each time. Of course, by the time that Niamh actually showed up he had been digging out some very-dead-plants that he had given up hope on and was so absorbed into this task that he didn't see her coming until she was almost there. Niamh instantly started fussing over the garden, which he hadn't expected at all, and it caught him off guard a little bit.

Hey, he said. Niamh continued to talk about the garden, and Eljay nodded with a frown. Some of them, but most probably won't. It'd take a lot of time to revive this. It was more Weejay's garden before the flooding, but lately... Well, it's no wonder. Not only did children grow and change, but also the garden was a mess - no wonder she wasn't as interested lately.

It would be so easy just to talk about other things right now, instead of what he had called her for. But he also felt that he had to do this thing, just so that he would have a clean slate with Niamh. He owed that to himself, but he also owed it to her. He didn't want to feel bad about what had happened every time he saw her. It had to be done. I uh.. How's the boy doing? he asked, even though he full well knew that because he checked up on Rasalas regularly himself.

Weejay- the young naturalist, who seemed to have taken after the Elwood line of Blackthorns in terms of personality. She believed that most of the children and grandchildren of Finley and Elwood still tended to lean toward the characteristics of one or the other of the founding couple- Eljay and Weejay were more soft-spoken, kindly and caring, like Elwood. The plethora of others were a bit more 'spicy' in nature, and took after the fiery- but still loving- Finley. Weejay it seemed was the one who had been tending to the garden, and when Eljay mentioned its ruin, he seemed to be implying that it wasn't simply the floodwaters that had done the damage...But that he'd noticed a certain amount of neglect had happened because Weejay might not have tended to it. She smiled softly. 

"Kids, Eljay," She sighed, "Am I right?" It seemed Weejay might have lost interest in her garden, which was potentially something Eljay had wanted to have as a bonding experience with his daughter. "Maybe she'll pick it up again come spring, hey? I mean, give it a month or two an' there'll be snow, so you won't be able to garden anyway. Maybe there's something winter-y that the two of you can do together," She suggested hopefully, trying to wean a bit of a smile out of him. She knew Eljay might take it personally should Weejay drift further from him but as Niamh knew...It was simply what kids did. There would be more, she assumed, come spring- but she didn't want to simply tell Eljay to forget about last year's litter and look forward to however many brats she'd inevitably give birth to come springtime. 

He asked about the child and Niamh's lips pursed. She shrugged. "Tough nut, that one." She sighed. "He's healing up alright, but still not saying much. Maybe he's just quiet, but I get the feeling that wherever the kid came from...It wasn't good." She said. "I'm hoping he can spend more some time with Phox- I think he likes hearing about the stars. He's named after a star in the Lion consolation." She said, oblivious of her malapropism, hoping that if by any chance, Eljay knew anything about stars that he might use it to endear himself to the child more. He was a gentle soul- and with both Primrose and Rasalas, she had decided to be softer, gentler, and put less pressure on them to become warriors. Phox and Eljay would make wonderful male role models for the kids.

"But lissen," She slurred, moving on to a topic she'd promised Towhee she'd addressed. It also seemed to her that Eljay might've been fishing to segue into a conversation about the day she'd brought Rasalas home by bringing his name up. "I- well, apparently there's some tension between Fennec an' I, an' I s'pose you wanna talk about that." She said. She didn't leave him long to interject, as per usual. "Thing is- I gotta confess. I'm not a hunnert percent sure why you put a yearling with no training in charge of tending to the wounds of an injured youngster, rather'n a packmate who's cleaned hundreds of wounds before. 'Specially considering he's shy, and I'm the only one he sort-of trusts. Now, on someone like me who's older an' tougher, sure- go ahead an' put whoever you want in charge of tending my wounds, so they can get experience without potentially scaring or scarring their patient 'cause I don't care, I'm tough, I'll sit through it- but I didn't want this poor, scared child to be handled by a novice, not after whatever it is he's been through." She said. "And especially without your supervision." She said. "So after you left, I decided to put my skills to use, an' ask Fennec to help me keep him warm. Was that such a bad decision? Because apparently it seems like everyone else thinks I'm bonkers for not lettin' a complete rookie tend to severe facial wounds on a scared, lost child." And then she realized she had to give a bit back, too. "I'm an over-protective Mama, Eljay. I h'ain't letting anyone but the best touch my kids if they're hurt. And that's you. An' if you're not around...Well, then I'm the one who'll do it, until you take on an apprentice. An' on that day when you get an apprentice, I will fully volunteer myself to be practiced on however you choose. Consider me your crash test dummy for your apprentice to heal until they get trained. But until then- I don't want my kids treated by an apprentice unless they're supervised by you." All four of them had had wounds to tend to- wounds that had nearly cost them their lives, lending them some experience in the area.

Oh — no, I didn't mean to imply — I mean... He tried to gather his words and then finally managed to collect them enough to push out a sentence: Maybe she realises better than me that it's going to end soon, huh? The garden, I mean, what with the flooding and then winter on its way. It wasn't entirely a 'they' thing -- flowers were, he supposed, but it was always Weejay who had taken to the garden more than he. He didn't at all feel like they were drifting apart, so he wanted to quell whatever thoughts Niamh might have towards such a thing.

Niamh spoke of Rasalas then, and Eljay nodded with a frown. Do you think he might've been kidnapped by someone bad or something? Because the thought that his parents would've done anything bad to him was completely outlandish to Eljay, so the thought did not even occur to him at all. But what could've happened? How had he ended up this way? Eljay could not help but think of Elfie, wondering if maybe he'd got hurt too and some pack of wolves'd found him. What if they had thought that he was being mistreated and maybe didn't have parents anymore? What if he was still out there somewhere, but he'd never see him again? I'm glad he's healing alright, though. I hope we can get through to him to get some information on where he's from and if he wants to go back there and if his parents are alive still.

At first Eljay was glad that Niamh started on the subject of Fennec and what happened that day. Eljay had no time to say anything in between the story she told. There were a lot of feelings: his relief was short-lived as Niamh said that she wasn't a hundred percent sure why he would put a yearling in charge of cleaning the wounds. He hadn't known how shy Rasalas was at the time, of course, but if there was one thing Eljay knew for sure it was that it was hard cleaning wounds and being the one to comfort someone. In general, it was more comforting to have someone you loved and trusted hugging you and keeping you warm while someone else cleaned wounds. The way Niamh brought the story left little space to interject his own opinion though. Was that such a bad decision? suggested that it certainly wasn't, even despite being brought as a question. And before he had a chance to answer the question, Niamh had already continued saying that she decided to take charge after he had left. But I instructed specifically on what should happen, why did you change it? Do you not trust my judgement? There was no space to say those things -- though it showed on his face that he felt a lot of things -- his eyebrows knit to a frown and some sort of emotion hidden in those shimmering green eyes -- before Niamh continued again. This time her words were a bit softer, but beneath the layer of compliments for him was still something -- I don't trust anyone but you, not even who you appoint when you can't be there -- that would make it very hard to say anything back. Because she did say that he was good. She did say she trusted him. But implicitly she also said she didn't trust his judgement.

Eljay was silent while chewing his lip for a few seconds after Niamh finally stopped talking, while he tried to gather his thoughts. She'd said so many individual things and he wasn't sure he even remembered everything he had initially wanted to say something back to. In the end, he decided to just sort of.. go for his own story. It went to show that practising what you were going to say at these sort of meetings never really worked.

Niamh, I.. I get that you're protective. And I appreciate that you trust me as a caretaker. So far the least scary part of what he was going to say. He took a deep breath and continued, the first words a bit shaky as he tried to find his proverbial footing: B-but I need you to trust my judgement, too. You were better off keeping him warm and calm while someone else just cleaned his face. And I couldn't be in two places at once. I could've cleaned his wounds all the way properly, but then I would not have been able to get the herb to reduce his pain. And you were needed to soothe him - you, too, can't be at more than one place at once. Cleaning wounds hurts, so I'd never advise doing that simultaneous to keeping someone calm. Maybe it went well this time, but next time, if it was someone who didn't trust her as much yet as Rasalas already had, they might shriek and run at the painful betrayal of their new guardian. There was just no telling. He was quick to resume: Look, I don't think we need to discuss what was the best medic decision back there. I.. I know you're the leader, but I... Eljay bit his lip while he was starting to feel physically nauseous. He didn't remember ever standing up for himself like this, and his statement lacked conviction and confidence because of it; .. I'm the medic, and I need you to trust me and my judgements and words, whether I'm there or not. Eljay licked his lips and looked to his paws; completely subconsciously showing signs of submission because this was just so incredibly scary and definitely all new for him to do. He was still convinced it was the right thing, but he was also terrified that Niamh'd hate him for it forever.

It couldn't really be saved, then. She looked down at the wilted plant she'd touched, and frowned. Perhaps some would grow back naturally in the springtime, as flowers did- going dormant, and relying on their buried roots to keep them alive and revive themselves once the snow melted. Eljay seemed disappointed, but willing to give Weejay an excuse for not tending to her garden so much any more. Niamh still felt that this was just another teenage/young adult thing- like picking up hobbies and then ditching them, running off into the wilderness without a goodbye- but she wasn't going to burst Eljay's bubble. 

With reference to Rasalas, she shook her head and shrugged. "He's...Hard to read. Kind of sensitive, but I think...I dunno. Yeah, I'd say something bad. Something got a hold of him by the face," She said, with a grimace. Like Towhee, Eljay seemed keen on reuniting the child with his parents, and Niamh nodded, knowing it was best to hide her reluctance. "And assuming they're not the ones that did that to him," She said. Given the fact that he hadn't expressed any interest whatsoever in finding his Mom and Dad, though, she had her doubts that he wanted to go  back where he came from. 

His expression changed as she spoke about her experience with Fennec, and she should have been grateful for the fact that he didn't interrupt her- on the multiple occasions where she'd said something that might've been crossing a line- and tell her that she'd been wrong, and that that was that. But Eljay was the sort of wolf who would normally tread very lightly when it came to addressing difficult matters. And though he took plenty of time to get his point across, he did finally come to the conclusion that she should have trusted his judgement and that she shouldn't have questioned him. Niamh wanted to shrug it off. She still felt that she might've been gentler than Fennec when it came to cleaning Rasalas' wounds. And the boy was still small enough that she could clean his wounds and keep him warm, especially if Fennec had stepped in to warm him as well. She was quiet for a few moments; at the end of it all, she did respect the fact that Eljay had summoned the courage to say these things to her at all. 

And so, she would deign him some respect by acknowledging the fact that he was right in a rare moment of humility. "Well. I will." She said, simply. It was her way of wriggling out of the obligation of apologizing directly, and admitting fault. The stubborn Regent still had a Machiavellian point of view on the matter, however- and with respect to 'the ends justifying the means,' that her call had been adequate, and needn't be questioned. So she would defer to Eljay- but that didn't mean there wasn't an issue for her to pick at. 

"Fennec, though," She said, like a child who could not stop picking at a scab and simply let the wound heal. "Might be in need of an attitude adjustment." She said. She felt entitled to a certain level of respect- especially from yearlings as they found where they fit within the pack's hierarchy- and had found it noticeably lacking in Fennec's case.

Eljay couldn't really imagine that anyone would do that to their own child. He wasn't able to understand that to any degree, and none of it, well, made sense to him. He'd never heard of any parent harming their child that way. Would a parent do that to their child? he asked, genuinely baffled. He had only ever known and heard of parents who were good; in Redhawk Caldera, at the Plateau, here at the Copse... There weren't any parents who would harm their child in that way. Sure, it was rough sometimes for kids, just like how he'd pushed Elfie away when he was still so young... But at the same time, he could never imagine hurting Elfie in any way. And Eljay found it very hard to let go on his belief that parents'd never do that to their own offspring. I hope not... he murmured as he tried to swallow that; in that case, it might be hard for Rasalas to ever recover from that, mentally. The sensitivity made Eljay relate somewhat, at least, and he hoped that continuing to treat him might help him get some more information out of the boy at some point so they could figure out whether he had parents to return to.

After he'd said all of what he wanted to say Niamh was silent for a moment, and then she said that she would. Only then did Eljay realise he'd been holding his breath all this time as he breathed out, feeling so relieved that she just took his words for what they were and that she would trust his judgement. He smiled a little, feeling immensely relieved and really happy that he had taken the plunge.

The smile was short-lived as Niamh said that Fennec was in need of an attitude adjustment. It was a tricky situation because he didn't really want to get between Niamh and Fennec, and he didn't really want to choose a side. But if he would, then he found himself choosing his apprentice's side; mostly because she'd only been doing what he had asked her to do, that was how this whole conflict even started at all. Eljay bit his lip as he tried to decide what to say, his face overtaken by a frown. Eventually he said: Fennec's... I think that... that she could use your support, he'd thought to say maybe more than an attitude adjustment but swallowed those words right before he said them and then, after a few seconds, added, and that the uhm.. the attitude adjustment might come on its own, then. He wouldn't tell Niamh that she was Fennec's parent in some way too, and that her approval would mean a lot to the girl. He wouldn't tell her how to parent, for sure, but he just felt that Fennec felt like everyone rejected her capabilities and abilities and it'd mean a lot if her father's mate wouldn't.

Whatever it was that had happened to the child, it had caused him to be quiet; Niamh knew that his facial wounds pained him but still- she believed that a large portion of his silence was caused by wounds that neither the skilled medic, nor his blonde caretaker could see. Naturally, she was content to tell herself that even if it hadn't been his parents which had caused him injury, they hadn't done a good job of protecting him from it- and so, she was able to tell herself with a fair amount of conviction that Rasalas was better off with her and the Firebirds. After all- there were no better medics in the immediate vicinity than Eljay. That alone was reason enough for the boy to stay with them. 

And while Niamh believed that Fennec did in fact need to have a bit of correction with regards to her attitude, it didn't seem terribly fit to disagree with Eljay. She drew in a deep breath of air and exhaled slowly, considering his advice, before she looked away, almost pointedly, and nodded with her steely gaze somewhat averted. He was quite possibly right. And there weren't many times in Niamh's life when she would concede to another, and it settled on her shoulders uncomfortably. She gave Eljay a glance; like Phox, he was one of few who could temper her ire and curb her ego, though it wasn't without a struggle. She huffed, and smiled faintly. "You're a good Dad, Eljay," She said, once again looking away, as she shuffled her shoulders to loosen the tension that had settled between her shoulderblades. Fennec wasn't his daughter- but Eljay did certainly know how to Dad pretty damn well. "Well. I'm gonna go see'f I can find somethin' as a treat for the kids," She said. Her gaze drifted down to the soggy garden, and then up to Eljay. "F'anyone can bring this garden back to life in the spring, Eljay, it'll be you. I'll catch you around," She said, the compliment intended as her way of thanking Eljay for the conversation, and for settling some of the differences between them.

Eljay tensely waited for Niamh's response. He was not so sure she would take his words well, since it was a bit of a critique in some way. He didn't want to tell Niamh off; he just thought that it would work better if Fennec and Niamh both tried to get closer to each other, and considering her hurt feelings, Fennec wasn't going to be the one to take the step. When finally her answer came -- a faint smile and an unexpected compliment -- Eljay smiled, knowing that his words had hit home. Eljay felt a little mixed about the compliment, knowing that he'd failed a lot in raising his children because of the circumstances. He knew he could've done a lot better with a loving partner by his side; with Wiffle by his side. He'd tried his best, and though he felt that he had failed in many ways, he couldn't deny that it felt good that Niamh said he was good at it.

Despite the lack of answer, it was clear to see that Eljay appreciated her subtle response. He just hoped that it'd help her and Fennec along, too. Eljay nodded when Niamh said she'd see about finding a treat for the kids. Alright, see you later, Niamh. Eljay was still a little bit tense, but he also felt good about sticking up for himself and saying what he wanted to say, and relieved that it was over now. He glanced at the deadish garden and thought of spring. He hoped Weejay'd help him replenish the garden, then... If they were still around at the time. Thanks, Eljay said with a soft smile. He nodded at Niamh as she said catch you around and smiled at her one last time as she turned away and went on her way. Then he turned back to the garden with a relieved heavy sigh, feeling proud and relieved and all sorts of things at once.