Sun Mote Copse and she'll promise you more

it had taken a few days for the soft rabbit pelt jr had salvaged from a clean kill to completely dry to where she felt comfortable presenting it as a gift. she casts a look at ghost who takes to the skies ahead of her as she grasps the pelt betwixt her jaws.

a bit hesitantly, she approaches the birthing den, hoping that @Meerkat wasn't asleep. she does not quiet her approach, putting her weight deliberately into each step, hoping that her steps were enough to draw her sister from the confines of the den that jr would not just barge into.

above, ghost offers a series of short, shrill whistles in an attempt to help ( though jr, of course, did not hear his efforts to announce her ) before he perches nearby, preferring to remain out of reach.

this is one of those times, few as they were, where jr wished she could hear and speak. she wasn't often bothered by her disabilities but in this moment that insecurity flares up, bullying its way thru her carefully constructed confidence. she readjusts her grip on the pelt, though there was hardly any weight to it at all; gaze darting 'round, ready to leave it if her presence wasn't welcomed at the moment.

Sleep deprivation was no joke. Meerkat wouldn’t change a thing, though tending @Otter and Skipjack all hours of the day and night was taking its toll on her. She knew the pups wouldn’t be so demanding for long and she yearned for the sleep she would get then, though Meerkat simultaneously didn’t want to rush things.

I love you more than words can possibly describe, did you know that? she murmured to them this morning as they nursed. Even though it feels like my nipples might fall off at any moment and you insist on abusing the very same one every mealtime, Skippy… she murmured, huffing a dry laugh as she kissed her son’s head. Or would you prefer Jackie?

Before he could react—not that he was remotely aware of his mother’s question—Meerkat sensed a presence at the doorway. She knew, liked and trusted everyone living in the copse, so her tail began to stir. She tiredly sniffed the air, confirming her younger sister’s scent before Jr’s shadow literally darkened her doorstep.

Come in— the overtired mother said, then realized her error.

Stumped for a moment, she looked around herself. Her tired mind suggested she toss one of the babies Jr’s way. She signed a lot, so that meant she had strong arms and quick reflexes. She could catch them! Meerkat snorted at the absurd thought, then found a small stick and tossed it toward the doorway instead, just hoping Towhee Jr would understand the invitation it signaled.

though in reality, jr's wait wasn't long at all, to her, it feels excruciatingly long as she waits for some sort of sign from her sister that she was ok to come in. she considers just tucking the rabbit skin to the side for meerkat or njord to discover later and just as she prepares to do that, she catches the movement of a stick out of the corner of her eye.

she is fairly sure it's the invitation she's waiting for, but even so, she's a bit cautious and she readjusts her grip on her gift and shrugs into the den.

cautiously and nervously jr slides down to her belly as she catches sight of the small squirming pups nestled against her sister's side. she drops the fur and nudges it towards her sister, hoping there was enough light for meerkat to see her ptero.

-i made this for you and the kiddos,- jr signs, almost sheepishly. she really wasn't good at this stuff. -how are you doing, meer?- she signs before glimpsing at the pups. -how're they? what're their names?-

Seeing Towhee Jr’s face made her think of their mother, of course, and how she hadn’t returned with Fennec. Meerkat selfishly hoped Towhee would make her way back to the copse sooner rather than later, though for now, she focused on her young doppelganger.

-“Thank you!”- she said when presented with the gift, speaking as well as signing since it was what came naturally.

She gently took the pelt from her younger sister and turned to drape it over the Bairns, minding not to cover their wee heads. Meerkat wondered if they might fuss at the sudden warmth and weight on their small backs.

Otter didn’t seem to mind it much, though Skipjack mercifully let off her chapped nipple to wriggle and squirm. He didn’t fuss, just batted at the skin in a curious sort of way. Meerkat thought, I’ll allow it, and turned back to face Jr.

-“We’re all doing just fine,”- she answered the earlier question. -“The girl is called Otter, the boy Skipjack,”- she added, her face the picture of weary maternal affection. -“How about you? How are you settling in to the copse?”-

otter and skipjack. jr's gaze leaves meerkat to look at her newest niece and nephew a bit more closely; prolonging her response to the questions signed to her. to her, they are indistinguishable. two pudgy blobs that squirmed at meerkat's belly.

-they're cute,- jr signs, keeping her thoughts that they looked like fat roly-polies to herself. there were just some things she surmised one didn't say to a mother; and perhaps she would understand that kind of love one day ... but she doubted it.

-ok. i really need to socialize more.- she admits with a sheepish expression on her face. -i'm ... working on that.-

she glimpses at otter and skipjack again before her gaze goes back to meerkat and her sister's paws. -how long will they stay like that?- she asks, unsure how to articulate that she means blobby newborn stage.

-“Are they?”- Meerkat mused teasingly in response. -“Well, this is a good start. These guys need all the socialization they can get in the coming weeks. And they’ll change and grow quite rapidly. When they’re about a month old—another couple of weeks from now—they’ll be up and moving around, seeing, hearing and even talking a little bit. I’d love it if you helped me make sure they’re fluent in Ptero.”-

She knew integration might not be as easy for Jr as others, though Meerkat had faith that everybody would embrace her. Meerkat did frown suddenly when she realized it must be difficult, perhaps even impossible, for her to interact with Fennec. She blinked slowly, not sure what to do with this observation at present. She would try to think of something later.

-“What sort of adventures did you go on, before you wound up here?”- she wondered, taking a moment to comfort a fussing Otter before she retrained her eyes on Jr.

guilt creeps into jr's expression like heat at her sister's teasing.

-of course,- jr signs. -i'd be happy to teach them ptero.- though she wasn't entirely sure if she was the only deaf one in the family, ptero was a common language among them for a reason, and she was grateful as it was the only way besides basic body language she could communicate with them. or the world at large.

at the question about her adventures, jr takes a large breath, letting it out in a larger sigh. she recounts it to her sister, from finding what she thought was redtail rise and njord had tasked her with, to the usurping that had happened. she mentions ariadne and moonsong, how after the bison hunt it her and her husband had disappeared without word and how a man named dutch had stepped up and rebranded it.

how she'd reconnected with the OG towhee, took a little trip and met a pretty blonde woman with a large entourage and had feasted with her ( which to jr felt a little bit like a fever dream that had her blushing beneath her fur ), and then arrived on their doorstep the first time.

her paws stilled as she finished, taking stock of meerkat's reaction.

Meerkat didn’t often carry on long conversations in Ptero, though she wondered if her mother or sister often suffered from tired eyes and headaches. Perhaps it was just because she was so exhausted. She ignored the discomfort, giving Jr every bit of her attention.

-“I can’t imagine living someplace like Redtail Rise. As if life isn’t challenging enough without in-fighting,”- she remarked. -“I’m sorry your leaders took off without a word,”- Meerkat added with a disapproving frown, unaware that Ariadne and Asivaq were one and the same. -“I’m selfishly glad you ended up here, though. I think Njord mentioned you may want to learn a bit more about leadership…?”-

while meerkat relays that she didn't think she could live in a place like the rise with it's in-fighting jr cannot help but think that would she have been normal and could hear and talk like everyone else she probably would've thrived there. it spoke to her more aggressive nature and she wants to flourish in it; but instead jr lets it out in expected ways: on the borders, meeting strangers.

her paws are still; jr's version of being contemplatively quiet.

-i wanted so bad to do it all by myself. to prove to everyone ... and myself, that my disabilities can't keep me in a box. that they do not make me helpless.- her motions become impassioned, still very much wanting to prove herself.

to others. to herself.

self-doubt is no stranger to towhee jr. her own internal nemesis that she warred with a little less these days but often enough that she couldn't say her self-doubt was defeated by any means.

-i'd like to learn from you and njord. if you're willing to teach me.- jr admits, feeling a little awkward, as she had when she'd brought it up to njord.

Well, Towhee Jr only needed to look to their mother or even their sister to see solid evidence of success in the face of a disability. Meerkat didn’t say that outright, understanding that her younger sister needed to prove it to herself and for herself.

-“Yes, of course,” she replied easily. -“Our style is a bit on the softer side, which I of course think has a lot of merits. I picture you more like mom in a leadership role, but maybe I’m wrong. If I’m not wrong, though, there are probably things you can teach me too. We can learn from each other.”-

The little boy began to fuss now. Meerkat gave him a few soothing licks, though when he didn’t settle, she shifted to cradle the bairn in her forelegs. She tipped him onto his back and patted his bottom from a slightly awkward angle. This seemed to do the trick, as he went boneless in her arms.

Too late, Meerkat realized this meant she couldn’t sign now. She smiled apologetically at Jr, mouthing, “Sorry!”

seemed like a good place to wrap. <3

soft.

not exactly an adjective towhee jr would apply to herself.

she was a lot of jagged, sharp edges.

but pushing herself out of her comfort zone was how she would grow.

-i'll never learn to grow if i don't leave my comfort zone,- she signs with a slightly sheepish grin, watching as her sister tends to a fussing child. jr can't hear the fussing, but she can see one of the pups grow restless.

-we can talk later,- jr assures meerkat before stepping closer to press a kiss to her forehead, should her sister allow it. -i'll let you tend to the little milk monsters.- jr grins at her affectionate nickname for them, ridiculously proud of it before she's extracting herself from the den, suddenly eager to stretch her legs, all the while thinking that she absolutely did not want to be a mother.

besides the fact that she'd probably accidentally kill them, she wasn't so sure she could be confined to a den for however long it took for them to be weaned; shuddering at the thought.