Firefly Glen yomblod

hurt in his words. skaigona wanted to be enraged by them, to turn with a snap, with vitality ferocious in her blood once more. and for a moment there was indeed a flicker of anger in her eyes, a revitalized pain which faded as if she had not the strength to raise its ember.
"i don't know where he is, anselm. i took ezra and i left."
off she stared, unseeing now as the buttery golden light gilded the autumn trees, her own nape, anselm's angered eyes;
"i left that day because i'd asked amadeo to be leader and you were there. i found druid out there. she — i wanted her to come home. she was weak and — but she didn't seem sick. she'd stayed in that forest. i thought it was safe."
memories crested the battered hillock of her mind, slicing across ragged turf with the agony of a rusted blade.
"when i came home, amadeo was covered in blood. he'd said you'd fought. i didn't — i didn't have time to even think about that because someone, someone;"
she lost the fight there, clinging only to the dignity of her turned back as she sobbed out that moment of terror; "someone had taken gideon. i looked and i looked and amadeo — disappeared. i called everyone together, i said we had to go after you and him."
she shut her eyes and birdsong for an achingly long moment filled the space where her voice had been.
"druid attacked me. she bit me, anselm. i grabbed ezra and i left. i left al-all druid's kids. i left her. i left my sister. i just —"
a light, dizzied laugh. "ezra and i found swiftcurrent creek. and etienne found us. rightfully he hates me. but he told us where to find you and gideon, and we came here."
wrist raised to wipe her tears, her mouth. "i've been sick since we arrived. and worsening. so no, anselm. i'm asking you to take ezra so he doesn't have to watch me die."