Big Salmon Lake I got used to living without you

He felt the weight of his choice weighing down upon him, crushing his confidence. Injstice stung like rock salt poured into a wound- and she criticized him without knowing what Hell he'd been through. Could she not tell by the way his pelt hung off him like a soggy, oversized bathrobe, that he'd run himself nearly to death trying to get back to her- and all she cared about was the fact he'd been driven away by what she assumed was cowardice. 

She'd never once told him that she loved him- but now used that admission as a means of making him feel even more guilty. He could fling it all back at her, he knew. He could probably make her regret being so cruel to him. He wanted to be understood, and he wanted her to forgive him, not manipulate him into accepting that she was the victim in all of this. 

He didn't appreciate that she thought he was being a coward. If he hadn't run, he'd be dead. He had run, and was still barely alive. She seemed more content to run on her assumptions than actually ask him what had happened.

"I loved you too. But if we're gon- try, I need you t- stop jus- walk- away from me when thi- get hard. Or that's exac- what Killdeer will learn to do." He croaked. "Ask. Listen. Talk. You don't know why I was gone. But yelling an' manipulating and running- that is what cowards do."