Lion Head Mesa just exuberance

forward dated to a few days after his joining of ursus.

though ingram is aware that this mesa is only a place of temporary refuge, he makes himself as at home as he can; as much as he dares to allow himself. akashingo hosts those of ursus, which now includes him, and he busies himself eating — in seclusion as much as he can for his food possession has only seemed to have strengthened with the lack of food he's had while traveling without his shadow — and strengthening his jaws with each bone he worries.

he knows he should spar, should practice so he is not slaughtered as he killed praimfaya in the coming war ...but regaining his strength with a fully belly is first priority.

the morning was sunny; a chill in the air, frosting the dulling grasses under paw with frosty dew. it catches and glitters in the sunlight. he pauses briefly to examine a frost covered spiderweb before turning away and continuing his search.

and like an dark obsession, his shadow creeps into his thoughts; taking root and curling up inside the cavern of his chest until it aches with her absence and ingram feels the heavy threat of continued boyish sulking pressing down on him as he scowls in the direction of blackfeather woods; the dark woods visible over the grasslands that divide the territories.

little escaped the eye of the imperator.

least of all a boy he had told once to leave.

the eagle had seen the grey of the young upstart among the wolves of ursus. he had kept his distance until some days hence.

but now that the child was alone, germanicus strode toward him with pointed and heavy strides. if he had put his lot in with the madman then he wished to know. his suspicion of this one's motives had taken a true form now.

heavy footfalls expose the approach of the older man, and a glimpse of seaglass gaze brings with a pang of familiarity. a heavy breath is taken; the cool air rattling around in his lungs before he pushes it out in a heavier exhale.

he wishes to sulk alone, and having not forgotten their last conversation and how it'd turned so quickly south, ingram ( then worripa ) did not miss the heavy and pointed look that bores into him.

you did not tell me your enemy was the saints of the dying light. ingram remarks simply, steps pausing as he turns to face germanicus, suspecting this conversation was going to happen whether he ( ingram ) wanted it to or not.

the want to needle him further lingers, especially since he knows it is so easy, but due to the fact that germanicus' pack was hosting ursus, knew he'd have to keep that at bay...for the sake of being a gracious guest ( or however close to such a thing ingram could ever be ).

the saints of the dying light ...it sounded pompous and too many words for ingram, whom has spoken so much than he cared to — out of necessity.

"why would i volunteer the name of my enemy to someone who is not my ally?" the question was rhetorical, or so he hoped. its answer was clear. if the boy was sharp as the soldier had first judged him, the understanding would present itself.

"you are with ursus now." the eagle was implacable. "and you will fight in their war. i am pleased to see it," germanicus ended.

but there was one thing more. "i would have you tell me who you served beneath before. you would not speak it before. do so now."

the question aimed at his remark does not require an answer; though ingram could think of a few, all the same. he bids them back as the topic then shifted to his ( recent ) joining of ursus and that he would fight in the war; still he does not comment.

for what is he to say?

that he enjoys chaos? the thrill of battle? the taste of blood? that it was the condition in which he could find a home among them? all of it was true ...even if he had no particular feelings towards the saints of the dying light.

i told you, came his response when the shadow is brought up. it brings with it a modicum of pain; a yawning emptiness in the ache she'd left behind. i did not know her name. i only knew her as the shadow. if he'd been coy when he'd first admitted it, it had been intentional. now, he reiterates it with truth; words lacking any sharp barb. almost bare. she was about my age, if that helps.

"when you did not speak it i thought her name might be nyra."

two children. lost to the world. "what do they call you in ursus?" he chose his words carefully, not intending to trap the boy. he merely wished to signal an end to their tension.

germanicus supposed they now shared the same side.

she is no shadow. is all ingram offers in response. no, she reminded him of a star and imagined that she would singe and burn just as mercilessly. another pang of missing the shadow makes itself known within his chest and he scowls; gruffly. his attachment to his once companion could not be healthy ...and whatever affection he had begun to feel for her would clearly need to be buried. as deep as ingram was capable of burying it.

ingram. he replies with a grunt. they call me ingram. it was not what his mother called him but ...she was dead and her opinion ceased to matter the moment she'd left him; as did, apparently, her life.

"ingram." a formal name for so young a boy. but what has ingram seen in his time away from home? germanicus would ask no more questions.

"i am not your leader." it was a heavy preface. "i will not tell you to stay at akashingo when we move upon the saints. i will only offer combat training with myself and a man named arsenio, if you would like."

he turned his steps into another endless patrol.

germanicus speaks again, and ingram's chin raises just a fraction. it was true that this wasn't his war; he held no real stakes in it. the saints had not slighted him in any sort of way and he hadn't known the slain usrus queen ...but the fact that he lusted for battle, for the bloodrage could alone be trusted, even if his word wasn't really good for much. ingram himself wasn't even sure if he'd consider himself a 'man of his word' ...not really knowing if when push came to shove he would stick by it.

but he would fight because it was what the song of his bones and soul sung for; demanding in their merciless siren song.

he would fight because it was a distraction from missing the shadow and he was in desperate need of one.

maybe i'll take you up on the offer to train. ingram tosses towards germanicus as he begins his patrol ...and though a part of ingram desires to tag along, even for the sake of giving himself something to do, he does not.

the mesa was not ursus' claim, he reminds himself ...and though ursus and akashingo were allies they were not the same pack.

the boy did not follow and so germanicus did not continue. he found it admirable, the setting of a boundary for one so young.

"i will expect you then," the eagle rumbled. he exchanged a long look with ingram before turning and pressing on. in his mind it was good that ursus was gathering its own warriors. akashingo did not have many of its own to spare. and he suspected that merrick would be unwilling to fight in an organized manner.

but perhaps someone like ingram might be properly trained.