Redhawk Caldera All the walls would fall around me

He had so much to say. He felt Bridget was not only trustworthy, but wise enough to know how to handle the things he wanted to tell her. Fixing a leg, a wound, a bruise...It was all skilled work, of course- but to fix a heart, he knew, was something completely different. Still- he felt she could do it. It wouldn't be a poultice or mixture of herbs to consume to fight off all the bad but surely, she knew what loss looked like. It didn't seem to get all over her, the way it did for him, but perhaps she was simply better at hiding it. Maybe, in having treated so many wolves...She could help him figure out how to deal with it too. 

He sat silently, his lips wriggling as he tried to figure out how to word his thoughts, for quite some time. Her posture and silence tempted him to speak, and gave him a safe place to begin talking, but his thoughts became a whirling, aggravated hornet's nest of white noise. The same white noise that seemed to creep in whenever things got to be too much. Occasionally, he'd shrug, and draw in a breath as though about to speak, only to realize if he spoke, the feelings would only come out in a sob. He held his breath. He'd asked her if he could talk, and then just sat there, shaming himself for not being able to say anything. 

He decided to take a shaky breath, and rather than saying everything...It might be best to just start with one thing. The one thing that had been plugging up his thoughts, letting them grow and grow into something that was bursting from the seams. Be croaked out the question.

"I need you to be honest...Is there anything...I could've done?"