Moonspear Vienna

At first, Bronco thought Hydra was going to comment on his lack of conviction and ask that he step up, man up, as his mother would say, and get over his fears. He fully anticipated getting a lecture from Hydra arguing why it was best, sometimes, to make the choice to end a life- and was shocked when she did the opposite. His mouth fell open slightly, but he shut it slowly when she defied his expectations further by telling him he had a good heart. His heart ached to hear those words, in part because he was relieved but also because those words hadn't come from his mother, but from Hydra. Niamh had pinned him down and grabbed him by the throat, nearly strangling him in an effort to make him fight back- and that had been her response to the discovery that her son had a soft heart. Hydra, on the other hand, accepted who he was, and it made him mourn for a childhood he'd never really had. 

He wondered how Hydra had seen through him so easily, and had come to the conclusion on her own that he had issues with taking another wolf's life. Had Towhee perhaps told her about him on one of her last visits? He wouldn't think so...Because Towhee wouldn't have known, the last time she'd visited with Hydra, that he and Meerkat would be joining Moonspear at the beginning of the month. Hydra just had that sort of intuition, he guessed, though he supposed he didn't hide his reluctance well. 

"That, uhm," He said, his voice breaking softly. He cleared his throat. "That means...A lot." He admitted, wrestling with the corners of his lips which jigged and tugged under the swell of emotions. "I...I'd never live with myself, if I knew I let someone go...And they went on to hurt or kill someone I loved," He said, "But...I don't really know how I'd feel knowing I'd killed someone, that had a family and loved ones of their own." He said. "I still need to figure that out, I think." He said. It was a topic he'd discussed at length with Wraen and Towhee, but in the end, he couldn't know exactly how he would act in the heat of the moment. The only idea he had, of a possible outcome, came from the few experiences where he'd had to step up and fight back- and even thinking of those moments in retrospect made him feel ill. 

Fortunately, he'd have a bit of time to do more contemplation, and in the meantime he was encouraged to spend some time with Hydra's youngsters. "They'll have to take it easy on me for a bit," He said, with a soft laugh. "But I'll teach 'em what I know," He said, though he did intend to spend at least some of his time simply playing with the kids, rather than being a strict teacher. He'd have to introduce them to "Broncosaurus," to see what they thought of that. 

It tugged at his heartstrings again to be asked a question he wasn't sure he'd heard much before. Did those things- the tasks he committed himself to- did they make him happy? Generally, he knew there were expectations that he had to meet, ones which had at least in part been influenced by his environment. His mother, the Sergeant-at-Arms for the Firebirds, certainly expected her son to be well versed in self-defense as well as guarding and hunting, but he didn't mind pursuing those interests as, for the most part, it didn't involve going against his nature. "I do," He said, though his tone was unbalanced, a hint that he was still contemplating his decisions. "I think...I like being useful. I think maybe I like to please others? If that makes any sense," He said with a light shrug- though his ribs reminded him not to do much of that. "So like...Hunting, it lets me catch food, and food always makes others- and me- happy. And taking care of kids, like...I dunno. They're just fun, an' every Mom and Dad can use a break, and I don't mind having them chew me to bits, hangin' off my ears and screaming in my face, so I'm happy to help out with watching them. Patrolling the borders I like, 'cause sometimes I meet some really cool wolves...I think I'm just afraid sometime that I'll have to hurt someone. An' I've done it before, an' I like sparring, but I kind of...Agh, I'm talking too much," He said, with an apologetic laugh.