Big Salmon Lake I got used to living without you

It was both impossible for him to move, and unbelievably difficult for him to not want to bolt away when she moved toward him. He shrank, but remained rooted to the spot. A fleeting wave of relief crashed through him at the thought of her simply putting him out of his misery without a word.  

He stiffened as she sniffed him, but as soon as she reached out to touch him he began to shiver. Incapable of controlling the rattling and shuddering, he clenched his jaw to keep himself from biting his tongue and held his breath. His tail was tucked tightly between his hind legs, a mark of fear and cowardice as he stared straight ahead, frozen in place. 

It didn't feel like she was reassuring him, or trying to reconnect. It didn't feel like she was trying to hurt him either, but the sensation of touch brought nothing but fear to his heart. He was silent still even when she stepped back. As she did, so did he- awkwardly stumbling a few paces back in the water to put some space in between them in the hopes she wouldn't touch him again. 

She was angry. He still hadn't taken a breath, but he gasped when she shouted at him, and hurriedly sought to shush her. "Shh shh shhh!" He whispered urgently. "Don-- yell," He croaked in a dry whisper. Even without tone, there was fear in his trembling plea. He scanned the banks of the lake and licked his lips. His teeth chattered quietly and he clamped his jaws shut to try and stop it. His jaw ached from having to do this so often, now. He feared this might have been a bad idea. "Fenn, I c-can't come b-back," He whispered through his teeth. "N-not. Yet. N-not. Safe."