Redhawk Caldera But I can't fight anymore for you

He wondered, now, how she might have felt if he'd asked her on one of the numerous other occasions when he'd felt the impulse to ask her to be his mate. He might've wanted to ask her as far back as the day when he'd brought her the coconut shell, had that day not ended so poorly. He might've asked her in the early spring, or when she realized she was pregnant but...Things had never panned out. It seemed time and time again that just when they were within reach of something good, it was wrenched from their grasp.

He'd wanted to ask her when she'd become pregnant, but she'd shown so little enthusiasm about conceiving, with his child, that he'd decided not to. He didn't want her to think, either, that he was asking only because he'd knocked her up.

And maybe things would have worked out if he'd asked her then. Maybe he wouldn't have gone looking for his mother if he'd felt more tied to the Caldera. Maybe they would have sorted out their many communication issues by now. Maybe they would have figured out how to give and receive according to one another's love languages- but there was no way to tell. All he could hope for now was that he could provide a stable environment for Killdeer, and perhaps give him the opportunity to live a gentler life than the one he'd had.

His doubts grew when she offered to keep their mateship a secret- though it seemed like she was simpy offering to keep it quiet for his sake, not because she was wanting to keep it quiet herself. Unless, of course, this was her way of saying she wanted to keep their relationship a secret. He, however, wasn't going to have that. If she'd pitched such a fit to get him to be her mate, then why would she want to keep it a secret?

Whatever her idea and definition of mateship was, and how it should be approached and celebrated, was very different from his. And if he couldn't have his romantic proposal and little getaway, he at least wanted some sort of acknowledgement of their relationship.

"I'd have everyone know," He croaked bluntly. Perhaps he might've sounded slightly offended by the proposal that they keep it a secret, but he wasn't without the ability to compromise. "But if you wanna tell some first, like Killdeer an' Towhee an' whoever before making it public, that makes sense to me. I haven't even seen anyone else since getting back yet, but I dunno. I don't think anyone would hate to hear that I'm back and that we're mates." He said. He paused, and chuffed to clear his throat, in light amusement. "It'll be our pack one day anyway so we may as well start making our own rules now." He joked.