Moonspear you are to me like a very, very wild thing

Friendship, Hydra rejoined, wondering, when have you come to think like this? and, how have I missed such? Nikai; Nikai, pushing himself in her heart, softening her edges. Or was this Alya? Had Hydra overlooked this part of her? I do not want friendship, Alya. Not anymore. Not from any stranger to me. She had tried. She had loved Terance with all of her heart, and Rannoch too. She had even tried kindness with Korei Julia. It meant nothing in the end, even though Terance had realized he was wrong. The god of friendship was no friend to her, and th wounds he left behind were far more loathsome, as she saw it, than fear. 

She had a friend in Alya, and in Lyra. In Dirge. Even in Towhee, still, who had never wronged her. In Arcturus. In Jarilo. All others had left and betrayed her, despite her love for them. Despite her friendship. Kindness had only ever gotten Hydra nowhere; it was once Hydra who had wanted her sisters to have a more open mind about this sort of thing, and now look at them! 

Of course she could be wrong about that, too. One was the other, after all. Easy to get confused. 

Still, she heard her sister. Her expression turned a little sour for it. I have all the friends I need, she drawled, a little weaker this time. So many had disappointed her. She felt far older than she was; did she have to endure all of that again? With a huff, Hydra pressed, a little flatly, well, what do you suggest?