Swiftcurrent Creek [m] Fallen to her knees, but you couldn't ever tell

Reverie had known this, in a way; she'd always known that she was stuck with this, that her only option was to keep trying until something changed. That didn't bother her, not by itself. It was the way it affected the rest of her life — the way it warped everything so that her dreams and her nightmares were all about the same thing, about being truly alone.
What if... She stepped back from the hug to look into his eyes. Blue like an evening sky, she thought. What if it takes too long, and everyone gets tired of me? I've always thought that I want to be alone - to be free - but I - I'm scared of it, too. And maybe that's part of what's wrong with me. It's not normal to want to be alone, is it? Sometimes I think that if I was really alone like I wanted, I would just... fade away, and stop existing entirely. Her gaze fell away from him, and her voice sounded far away as she finished. And I don't know if I want that. I'm finally seeing the world, and I love it very much, and everything in it. I just... don't love myself. How can I? I've seen what happens to people who love me.