Two Eyes Cenote i am woman,

she looks into the stillwater—a perfect looking glass. and then she looks to @Eset behind her, smiling. Rashepses is gone, for the present, and the woman has applied to her shoulders swanfeathers with teeth that took extra care not to pinch (but still would, given the nature of the work) in the beginnings of something ceremonial to wear for her husband. she is sticky with honey and sweetsap, and some of the feathers were sure to drift away as she moved—but once again, Eset would outdo herself! 
and she was not yet finished—Toula wished she had the mind of Eset, so beautiful and brilliant. you are incredible, do you know that? Toula asked in earnest, eyes sparkling! Eset—your hard work, it is not unseen. I would like for you to become my Hebsut, once this place is fully our own. I know it is your wish to serve, and this way you still can—but you will be one of the head keepers, as I know you are capable of it. as I have seen for myself, she looks over the woman before her, beaming, hopeful—
Rashepses, her heart; Senmut, her mind; Eset, one hand; Zaahira, her teeth. each of them essential to her, and each she would remind them of such as often as she could.

The days since were very long with the fragrances and voices in their court changing constantly. There was an uneasiness that was never permitted to develop into anything more. She’d found a way to compartmentalize in the care shown to her by Pharaoh. Each of their meetings were charged with a sense of exactness and the fellahin felt through the murk of mental wanderings, a destination. It was enough to remind herself that Muat-Riya was a beginning, and she’d wanted this. She still could want this.

Toula speaks with all the charm and ebullience, the eager openness the fellahin had come to recognize was her character and not simply youth. The interval of Eset placing the final quill and Toula turning to face her was a moment she would return to repeatedly.

“You honor me, divine one,” she drops her head quickly, profoundly quiet.

“You have given me purpose- a life I could have not imagined. I am honored to accept this role, if it is your belief I am fit for it.”

having this be like. dress fitting the night before to make sense of timelines LMAO! will probably make one more of them actually dressing her up to walk down the aisle that’s more current!

I do, she answers in turn, looking to the darker woman before her. beautiful, of heart and of soul. Eset had become an encouraging and guiding hand to her. before so many did Toula trust the one that aided her in so many ways. 
she takes a step closer to her friend, urging her to rise with a smile. do you wish for marriage? children? she asked with a casual air, still bright—she turned to the looking glass again and casually hums, perhaps an ermine coat, over my shoulders… what do you think? she did not wish to pressure Eset into conversation she did not wish to have, and so offered her the alternative subject of further amplifying the look they two curated for her wedding!

“The white one,” she agrees and crosses the room to take the delicate fleece into her paws.

Marriage. Children. It was what girls spent their lives dreaming of, and pursued now at her age. Eset did not think she knew how to be a good wife, much less a mother to their children.

“Is it a common practice, for fellahin to marry in Akashingo?” She asks, endeavoring to meet Toula’s casual air as she drapes the velvet over her withers. Her holy one radiates light, as a seraphim. A tranquil smile touches the hebsut’s lips.

“Are you in love, Pharaoh?”

Toula nods—and thinks. she speaks creatively with Eset, who inspires her in this way, too! perhaps feathers here upon me, and she gestures to the area that would frame her face—creating a crown effect, perhaps… the illusion of one at least! not that this would last for very long either—just the moments that mattered. 
the question asked was met with a small smile. not previously, though I think now—if it is desired—I shall see that such a thing can be done. I intend to free fellahin from trade—have their designation in this place be their choice, she hummed. Eset would know it to be true—as would Inji, and Tuna, and any in service to her. she had always asked! but you shall be Hebsut. you might have your pick of husband, with your elevated status. even nobility, you could choose, the corners of her eyes lifted. while your role is still one of service—you yourself are only to answer to my own commands. Pharaohs left hand. no one else might make any demand of you. she did not think any had—but she wanted it known. her gaze brightened. is there any at this party you have your own eye upon? she asked next, smiling—chasing away her own nerves, sufficiently distracted! 
but brought back. buoyed, at least, by the comforting truth. I am—I love him, truly. and… now she whispered, there is passion! and even quieter she said, but… I do not know what to do with it! this… inferno, in the pit of my stomach. it does not only linger, it grows and grows, 
and it made her a little afraid. each minute she spent with it, and with him, she thought it might consume them entirely. burn her to ash, and him with her. it was an ache that was not entirely unpleasant, but certainly overwhelming! she looked searchingly to Eset, wondering if she might have the answer.

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Eset reaches for the quills, doing her best not to pinch at the skin around Pharaoh’s crown as she works an arc across her temple. She quite enjoyed putting these looks together, and even more-so when Toula gave her input, too. It reminded her of the thrill of preparing dishes alongside Keiko, each giving themselves to their ideas. Work; it was the opposite of divine magic. But Eset loved the toil of bending the world to her will, and feeling that the power of such a thing was within her hands.

She felt power too, in Toula’s protection and words that permit her everything. None could make any demands of her; none. Is it what this new rank offered? Choice was Toula’s offer, but fellahin are so easily malleable by those who outrank them, perhaps in a way the Pharaoh did not comprehend. The patterns were cyclical. Eset had always viewed herself through a capitalistic lens. Everything she offered had a definite currency: a smile, a laugh, or her kiss. But she’d had a chance to turn the tables, to never be disrespected again-

She is still thinking on what it means when Toula asks in her pleasant way who among them had drawn her eye. The truth was, the fellahin had tried not to notice a single face. She had only walked the halls and prayed at every turn to avoid trouble.

What she craved- it was not sweet. It was obsession; poison.  It was not the grounds upon which to build a marriage, or raise children. Eset been ruined for love. This was not the sort of relationship the fellahin wanted for her Pharaoh. She knew she had no answer to give that would satisfy the young ruler.

“Muat-riya. Perhaps I will love this palace as if it were a husband to me,” she fixes a laughing gaze over the girl’s turquoise and sets another feather.

Toula was transcendent in her delight. Eset liked seeing her this way. If there was anyone who deserved a family, it was Toula. What a mother she would make- fair, and understanding and able to give the world to her children. Happy children with happy childhoods. And Eset- she would see this through, by her side.

“You deserve it, divine one. I am happy for you,” her eyes upon Toula warm but flicker with endearment as she makes her quiet confession.

“Remember what I taught you? You do not need to wait for Rashepses to please yourself, holy one. It is enjoyable to share it but your pleasure is not predicated on anyone else.”

“Go down to the pools tonight and explore yourself, Pharaoh,” the edge of her smile lifts. There is no shame in it.

the Queen is soothed by the caring touch of Eset as her work is done. the things that do pinch she does not so much as wince at—some looks required some measure of unpleasantness, and it was all tolerable. but throughout, her gaze is warm and happy, all too thrilled with the way that the woman with her executed her dreams to perfection.
her words caused Toula to laugh softly, the amusement in her gaze a perfect match for the woman before her. but a new epiphany startles her, as her gaze for a moment turns away. today… today could be different for her, it occurs to her. there would be nothing wrong with that, if that would be your wish. your paw shall never be forced one way or the other. Akashingo—it is my first love. I was to be wed at all, for Akashingo, for its continued greatness. and love—it might have had nothing to do with it. Senmut, whose heart would always belong to another—oh, she loved him, truly, but to know she had caged him would have been a heartbreak she did not believe she could bear! was not the purpose of her reign, the largest part of her dream, to rip every lock off the things that kept others trapped? and Thutmose… yes, she could have come to love him perhaps, with his kindness and his thoughtful acts, but it was for his army and the protection of Akashingo that she would have wed him. other names, other reasons—all for Akashingo.
@Rashepses had even been for Akashingo, at the start! his dowry of goats and riches were not to ever be forgotten. his kingdom, marrying into her own—divinity wed to divinity. yes, both their kingdoms were what had drawn them together—but it was love, truly, that took root in the earth they two walked upon together. again Toula thanked the Gods. 
her eyes turned to Eset once more. I love you, you know. so know that Muat-Riya will love you in turn, and now her smile was full. gratitude to the Gods—for her husband, and for her Hebsut! 
but the next things said were considered in silence for a long moment. perhaps the full breadth of her own inexperience would be laid bare before Eset, but with her Toula kept no secrets. the cool waters do well to straighten my mind, a soft laugh then, the words a rather flimsy veil for I do not know where to even begin! no shame, no—but she maintained her sense of decorum, not knowing how to lay the truth out plainer than this, having been born in a court of murder, mystery, and intrigue. 

mmi was 1000% my favorite furc game once upon a time

She knew in that moment so many expressions passed over her face- grief, uncertainty, surprise. But last was a fondness so great, so intense, she felt herself drowning in it. For a long moment, Toula’s proclamation of love hangs with them in the air of her bedchamber. Eset looks down at her feet. Emotion wells into her eyes, trembling on her lower eyelids.

She would come to regret how she fled from affection, how she spurned love to guard herself. It may be that in the years to follow she would fill with a deep remorse for not seeing her likeness in the face of a child, and look longingly at a vision of a family she had always felt undeserving of.

But she is not alone. She feels love everyday when she walks beside Legend, or when Tuna regales her with childhood stories. When she gathers herbs with Tavina, and sees Racharra’s growing smile.

And there was love- a rich, deep, unalloyed love, in this small, private moment between Pharaoh and Hebsut. Eset grasps for Toula’s hand.

She was surrounded by women. Brilliant, honest, humble women, who were praised for their competence and the inner workings of their minds.

“I love you,” and finally Eset could bring herself to say it, but not without her lip quivering from the weight of such a word.

“And I will love Muat-riya, as you love Akashingo.”