Blackfeather Woods what does she think of me?

Over the past days, Maegi had been cataloguing her myriad failures. The most recent of which, Ven—well, no. Venamis had been intractable from the start, she thought; his departure was an inevitability, not a shortfall. It was Sakhmet's disappearance that was the latest blow. Sakhmet, and the last of her hope had gone with the girl.

She was not fit to lead.

She walked through the woods for days, taking in each sight and sound and smell. The Altar, with her sons' remains. The Weeping Meadow, which she loved (and feared) so greatly. The swamps, the trees, the gurgling creek.

Finally, the Nona drew to a stop, paws aching, within the Redgrove. The winter wind whistled through her pelt, lifting the fine pale hair in ghostly fashion. A ghost, she was a ghost; but if things weren't real, they surely would be much better. No, it was reality that had given her pain after pain. The world she had tried to mold for her wolves had crumbled beneath her paws.

Maegi was tearless. She was emotionless. Reduced to a dispassionate counting of her failures.

They deserved better than this husk of a young woman.

Her call rose into the freezing air, a cloud of mist from her muzzle, the words to come lodged at the base of her throat. She howled for @The Ghost, then @Moonshadow, @Rowan and the newly returned @Moonshine (a miracle among the mire), for @Jakoul and @Midar and @Khepri and @Aries and all else who would come —

If they were still here. If they hadn't left for better. She wouldn't blame them if they had.

The woods...
Blackfeather Woods was a never-changing entity in the Teekons.
Well, it was until the earth shattered beneath them, and they had to leave in fear.
In fear that the Daedra hated them, but it was Jaes.
Jaes the betrayer.
Jaes, Sithis.

The young boy had thought a lot about this. He'd yet to go to Maegi about it.
But now a possibility came, for she called the inhabitants to her.
He bounded to the Redgrove, arriving soon as he wasn't far away. But what could she need to talk to them about? Was there an attack?
He searched around them for coyotes or raccoons. 
He hoped his sister was still close.

Winter was approaching and Moonshadow could feel it in her heart. The herds have not returned and even mice were becoming harder to come by. But the mother however made sure her young and the pack were fed first before herself and the woman's body showed it.

She had been patrolling when she heard her leaders call and she immediately went to its origin and saw Rowan was already there. "Is everything okay?" She asked.

He was always near her; they were twin ghosts roaming. When she moved he moved, when she breathed, cried — or stagnated in her grief and her sorrow, he was there. And when she called for them he watched. There was a growing child and there was a shadow, but the rest took their time. The young man drifted from between the trees and settled near to Maegi, silent as always, watching and waiting. He did wonder if the woods would survive the winter — especially after the destruction of autumn — but he could not voice his concerns; instead they were written plainly across his face: a grim expression.

Not many came. That was telling. Just Rowan, Moonshadow and, of course, her love. To the latter, she drew close; to the former, she gave a solemn nod in response to her query. She remained silent for a minute, waiting for anyone else to emerge. They did not.

I have failed, Maegi began, her voice soft but with a haunting resonance to it, like an echo in a cavern. We have lost so many, and our numbers are so few. I have failed time and again to keep this pack strong, and now it's time for me to admit it instead of pretending I'm capable of— A sudden lump in her throat; she swallowed it, nostrils flaring in a sharp inhale. Of being your leader.

She cast her eyes slightly upward, as if looking upon a large face of rock. There's a pack in the mountains called Diaspora, she continued. I'm acquainted with their leadership. They are strong, and they will take us in—if you wish to go with me.

Maegi blinked apologetically at the trio before her. It's all right if you decide to stay, she murmured. But you'll have to do so with someone else in command. I need to do what's best—and what's best is putting my pride aside and seeking strength elsewhere. So. . .

Suddenly, the tears welled (at, of course, the wrong time). She narrowed her eyes, keeping them at bay; her vision shimmered like mirage. All at once, it hit her. Blackfeather Woods would have to carry on without her, and she without Blackfeather Woods: a place she'd once vowed to die within.

He felt his heart sink, fall, and shatter on the woodland floor.
"No."
 How could she do this? After everything he'd done for this pack, and for her, how can she just leave?
As a leader, she should fight for her pack...but she claimed she couldn't.

"Someone can take over."
His face contorted into anger, looking at the pair. Was she just running away with one-eye? Things were bad and she was just leaving...
He wanted to find Moonshine, to tell her they were going. She was going and so was he. Take Khepri back to his home, then return here and make his own pack. In his woods.
He stood, trying not to glare. His tail had risen in defiance, but what was she gonna do? Tell him off?
He felt like storming away, but he was rooted, waiting.
Waiting for her to tell him it was a lie.
That there was a solution.

But he knew it wasn't. And there wasn't one.

gonna wrap this up since it's old and Moonshadow is inactive -- it'll be open for a couple more days before archive

She felt pain ripple through her at Rowan's expression, his counter-arguments. The Nona shook her head slowly. If they can, they're more than welcome to, she responded, eyes drifting over the two adults assembled. But our numbers are so low, Rowan. We'll only survive by banding together with our allies.

This was one of the most difficult moments of her life, and she drew close to Mou, leaning slightly against him for support. We'll leave in a couple of days, she said, her voice far from definitive. I hope you all will join me in going to the mountains.

If they didn't, Maegi wouldn't hold it against them. She wished only the best for her fracturing pack; she needed them to survive this winter. Whatever it took.

He pouted. He needed to find Khepri and leave. Help him get home, then return himself. Surely his Mother wouldn't drag him and his sister far away somewhere.
"I hope you have fun there."
He had no interest in the mountains. They were painful and tiring, and sometimes scary. He'd rather be alone in the woods than in the mountains.

He moved to Maegi and touched his nose on her chin before leaving the group to find Khepri and his sister. He wasn't going to wait for Moonshadow to decide what she wanted to do. She'd taken them into enough danger.