Lion Head Mesa manzanita

belen did not ask. she did not tell kasmut. she did not speak of it to anyone. ramesses and the queen had informed her in expansive ways. the girl wanted now to test their limits. she bathed and combed her fur, lodging a blue feather behind her right ear. she snuck through the hallways toward the prince @Crowfeather's room. she hid in closets when someone passed and hovered in shadows so she would not be seen. "your majesty," belen purred quietly, bowing in his throne room and not pressing forward. "i have come to see how the prince of akashingo heals." she had served a priest. she could serve a noble.

An unfamiliar voice started him from his thoughts.

The shadow drew his head upward and peered across the room toward a lovely young figure with remarkable glass blue eyes. Crowfeather was certain that he had never seen this girl before, but she seemed to know of him. She called him a Prince of Akashingo! The dark wolf swallowed heavily, wishing that he could correct her. The truth was that he did not know his role within the mesa clan.

Oh, h- hello, Crowfeather greeted her with a small smile – one that did not meet his eyes.

Are you… the one who is supposed to be the wife? he then asked her uncertainly. Crowfeather could not help but feel that he was being rude.

"oh, no," belen softly laughed. "i am only a fellahin." crowfeather had not turned her away and so the girl stole closer. she looked at his injured leg. the rest of him was glossy. he was the color of a raven's wing. "i had never met you. i wanted to mend that."

Oh, she was one of the Pharaoh’s special wolves. Crowfeather’s head tilted curiously as he gazed upon her. The feather that had been tucked behind her ear made her eyes spark with blue. She did not remind him of the other Fellahin, but he was unable to say why that was.

I’m Crowfeather, he offered his name with an uneasy attempt at a smile. I- I’m sorry I- I don’t know your name.

Perhaps she had been introduced to him at some point and he had forgotten. There seemed to have been many things that had slipped from his mind in the time he had rested at Akashingo. Crowfeather was not even certain he knew what season it was.

"i am belen." she smiled sweetly at him and sat down right in front of crowfeather. the girl was nervous, but tried not to let it show. she arranged her limbs smoothly, like she had seen kasmut do when settling next to the pharaoh. his smile was wary. belen wanted to put him at ease. "do you know the game of senet. noble one?" the fellahin asked. crowfeather was very handsome, she decided. she retained a hope that he would wish to continue her learning.

Belen, he repeated with a small nod.

She stepped into the room and made a space for herself. Her movements were smooth, fluid, as though she’d done them a thousand times. He wondered if the Pharaoh had found another nursemaid. Crowfeather would not have minded getting rid of Tavina. She was cold and harsh. She did not have even an ounce of laughter in her eyes. The dark woman had made him miss Tamar more than he cared to think about.

Senet? I haven’t heard of it. What uh… what do you do? the shadow inquired of her. Each time she called him a prince or a noble, his ears would splay atop his head. Crowfeather did not doubt that this was the Pharaoh’s doing.

belen collected ten little red pebbles from the cool sand beneath their paws. she lay them out, six to a row. "pretend that this side is the beginning and the other is the end." she looked up into his eyes. "you have to move your pieces from one side to the other. it is a game about the afterlife." belen giggled. she had noticed his ears. but her role was to respect crowfeather's own. "do you believe there is a life when we die, prince?"

The dark wolf watched as she gathered red stones and laid them out in the sand. His ears were drawn to a point. His honey gaze rested curiously on her movements. Crowfeather had never seen such a game played before.

Can’t you just move them all the first time and be done with it? he asked her, squinting down at the pebbles with scrutiny.

Belen asked him if he believed in an afterlife. Crowfeather looked back up to her sharply, wondering why she would ask him such a thing. The dark figure swallowed and nodded his head. It was a shaky motion, but he was not certain that he trusted her. He could not fathom why one of the Pharaoh’s beautiful Fellahin was keeping him company.

My clan believes that we become stars if we follow the path of the warrior. It is the only way, he spoke softly to her.

belen put her head to one side. "you could. but where is the fun in that?" she wanted to go on, to explain the rules and the shapes, the full word and the throwing sticks. but crowfeather's words were unexpected. "what if you are not a warrior?" she passed her paws lightly over the round backs of the small stones. "i am not." she avoided a glance at his leg. "are you?" she wondered what exactly had happened. perhaps he was a warrior after all.

Crowfeather blinked at her.

He couldn’t see where the fun was in moving one at a time, either, but he didn’t wish to argue with the blue-eyed girl.

Belen wished to know what path there was for those who were not warriors. The shadow glanced thoughtfully at her feather and then settled his eyes on her face. There are few who do not follow the warrior’s path. A medicine wolf, a seer, but these are the only ones. The girl wanted to know if Crowfeather had been a warrior.

The dark wolf moved a single pebble from one end of the line to the other.

No. I always wanted to be one, though.

Sadness washed through him. Crowfeather sighed softly.

she felt the feather twined into her fur. had he looked at it? belen was glad that she had thought of decorating herself. "you are a seer." it was what had been told to her. "and you want to be a warrior." she felt that she understood his sigh. the prince was filled with a great deal of despair. "what if you were a seer for warriors, si?" belen smiled. "there is always a way to have what you desire, prince."

Well, yes. I am a seer for all. Every wolf in my clan.

Crowfeather moved another pebble.

But warriors get to patrol the borders and hunt to fill the prey caches. They get to fight. They get to protect the clan with their teeth and their speed. All I do is listen to stars and have dreams of the future.

When Belen remarked that there would always be a way to have what he wanted, Crowfeather soured. He thought of Germanicus. The thought of the silver eagle made him feel so flustered and upset that his hackles began to rise. When he realized how out of control his emotions were carrying him, the shadow clenched his teeth and fixed his eyes on Belen.

That’s… that’s not true…

he moved a stone. she moved one as well. his anger was swift and reactive. belen pulled her paw back. but she was not worried. the glassblue eyes searched his face. "you want more than being a warrior." another stone. she blinked at crowfeather. "the stars are important. if you know the future, then you know more than any fighter." belen dared now to gently slide her paw forward, brushing against his own before a retreat.

It’s not that simple, the dark boy muttered.

The dreams aren’t… clear. I’m meant to decipher their meaning.

When Crowfeather thought of being more than a warrior, he could only think of the silver eagle. Germanicus was a bit of everything, he’d come to realize. The man was a diplomat, a leader, a hunter, a ranger, a warrior, and surely many other things that the shadow had not been witness to. Was it right to long for a man he hardly knew?

Belen’s touch surprised him. He recoiled sharply, ears flattening to his head. Crowfeather’s eyes were like saucers.

I’m- I’m- I- words choked in his throat.

S-Sorry.

He hurried to place another pebble at the end of the line.

belen nodded. "i am not a seer. but i imagine that las estrellas — the stars — that they do not surrender their messages easily." she watched him roll his piece forward and moved to block with her own. a burble of laughter erupted, though belen did not let it go long. "i do not mind, prince. your rooms are peaceful. and i have no tasks here." the fellahin swiftly shifted another pebble. did sayyadina not touch him?

The dark figure shook his head. Belen was right about one thing – the stars did not relinquish their messages without a great deal of effort. Crowfeather could remember many nights spent worrying over his ability to translate the meaning behind his dreams. His father had never been pleased with his progress. Threats of doom hung over his head.

Do you like it here, Belen?

Crowfeather’s voice was soft. He had not been pleasured the way other guests had. The Fellahin that Pharaoh had sent to his rooms had only been regarded with wary glances. The seer would not allow them to touch him. The thought was horrifying.

"i feel that akashingo can teach me many things." another stone. another roll. "but if you are asking if i have other ambitions than to be a fellahin — yes, my prince." belen grinned into the handsome darkness of his face. "are you not, noble one? happy, i mean." what was the point of delight if it could not be shared? she studied him for a long and open moment.

She answered him in a way he did not expect. The question had been about her happiness, not her ambitions. Crowfeather wondered if they were the same, then. Perhaps Belen believed that her desires and her ability to accomplish them were the deciding factor in what made her happy. Her answers still puzzled him in a way he could not quite wrap his mind around.

I am not.

The dark wolf moved another stone and sat with a pensive frown.

Tell me of your plans, he said after a moment. The honey gold of his eyes shifted up to her face. Crowfeather was interested to hear what a Fellahin might plan in the Pharaoh’s kingdom.

the way that the prince spoke now felt conspiratorial. naturally she leaned into it with a quick little grin. "i want to travel. i want to see more than the palace. and maybe i want to be a noblewoman. a wife. perhaps i will even have children." ramesses and satsu had made her service very pleasant indeed, but there was more to the world. belen remembered why she had come and looked up into crowfeather's face, smoothly moving closer to him. "will you tell me why you are unhappy, noble one?" this time she did not move a stone.

The girl’s answer was nice enough. She wanted to see the world and make a name for herself. The shadow had heard similar desires from the warriors of his homeland. Crowfeather could only hope that she accomplished what she wanted. He did not wish to tell her how difficult it was – how the world did not care for wants and wishes. Perhaps she would find that out for herself.

Belen asked him why he was unhappy. She seemed to have forgotten the game.

Crowfeather glanced toward her. His expression soured and then saddened.

I do not belong here. I do not like Akashingo. I do not like the Pharaoh or his eyes… The man’s lapis gaze burned in the seer’s mind. I miss- he stopped himself. Belen likely had never met Germanicus. She would not know who he spoke of. Besides, Crowfeather was not certain that he wished to share the older man’s name with her. It was special – it was for him.

crowfeather was so very sad and yet he was so very handsome. the gloss of pain and snap of anger in his golden eyes brought her heart to a gallop. under a sudden rush of jealousy belen wondered if he had lain with sayyadina, who had been assigned to serve him since he had been brought to these rooms. but then he was speaking of what he did not like, and this included pharaoh. she did not know what to think. how could anyone not like pharaoh? the way he had made her to feel — belen kept herself close, her eyes trained upon the prince. she was closer still, close enough to see the way his mouth formed his frustrated words. "who do you miss?"

Germanicus…

And suddenly, Crowfeather wished that he was anywhere else. It was not fair that he was left to feel such things. It wasn’t fair! He wished he could speak his thoughts aloud without sounding like a spoiled child, but there was no way around it. The shadow did not want to continue his journey within the mesa. He wanted to travel east and to see the things that the older man would show him.

The dark figure’s eyes would not meet Belen’s face.

the prince would not look at her. belen wanted to frown but kept herself in check. this was what she had been taught by kasmut and by jawahir. this was what she had learned from the queen. "i did not meet him. i only know that he once lived here. and that he is a soldier." had crowfeather also been a soldier? why were they not together? she did not ask. belen wanted him to look at her again. "will you tell me about him?" her voice was breathy, pitched low with utter focus upon the neb.

The young girl said that she had never met Germanicus. Crowfeather was not sure if this was a good thing, or if it was something that irked him. He festered on it for a long moment before he looked to Belen with a curious glint in his gaze.

She wanted to know about him? She wanted Crowfeather to speak about Germanicus?

The shadow found himself growing warm.

He is a very good man. He seems serious, but I believe it is because he’s quite good at- at hiding away his emotions. He told me that I should do the same. Crowfeather could hardly stop the words as they fell from his mouth. He was nearly breathless. It was a feeling he had never had. He has a very good sense of duty. He makes friends better than anyone I’ve ever seen. It’s like he just knows just what to say and he says it so well. And he’s a great teacher! There were so many things that Crowfeather could say about the older man. There were so many things about Germanicus that filled his mind.

Germanicus saved my life…

Crowfeather’s eyes glossed over.

We- We are- a small grunt to clear his throat. We’re supposed to be traveling east together, after I heal. There’s somewhere that he wants to go and I- I wish to go with him. I miss him. I miss him very much.

germanicus was a man who lived in crowfeather's mind. they had traveled together. he had been taught by the soldier. the adoring way that the words rushed from the prince made belen wonder if anyone would ever talk about her in such a way. her eyes widened gently as he spoke of his life having been saved. "so he will come back here?" the girl murmured softly. "and you can tell him these things yourself." she dared to press his paw with her own, though her touch did not linger. here crowfeather was, speaking of germanicus and all the while pharaoh was arranging a marriage. he was not ready for it, belen decided. "if you miss him so much, i am sure he feels the same." the words felt weak. she wished that he would look at her finally, truly look at her and see what it was she could do for him.