Swiftcurrent Creek Well it's just like going home

The call came clearly; but its meaning was not immediately known to the guardian, who traipsed along the borders at a slow, careful pace. It made her tail curl, and her lips quiver. She pushed her whiskers forward indignantly, and huffed. She changed her course, and made for the area she'd learned to avoid- she'd been unwilling to cross paths with the married couple while they were together, but considering the fact that Lestan announced his departure to the whole pack, she felt she wouldn't be intruding. She'd take advantage of his absence in an instant, especially when it seemed like something might be wrong. 

Had he discussed his intentions with @Reverie? She did not have a right to know, but she yearned for an explanation nonetheless- keen, perhaps, to build up her armory against the man. Stiff-legged, she cut a course through the pack's territory, splashing through the creek where the current was low and the banks firm. Still dripping, she found her way to the place Reverie and Lestan had claimed, only to find the woman quietly succumbed to sorrow. 

For a moment, she considered leaving her for the afternoon- to hunt Lestan down, and demand he return to his wife- but that would expose everything, if she did. And if he obeyed her, he might appease his saddened wife, and she wouldn't give him that grace, either. 

She finally shook the water out of her pelt, and then approached Reverie quietly, and lay at her side.

Moss was here. Reverie lifted her head numbly, her face soaked with tears that still kept coming, on and on and on. Moss, She did not recognize the sound of her own voice, hoarse and whispery with emotion. She stared at her with eyes that did not see, did not even register that her fur was wet.
He left, Of course Moss would already know. But it was all she could think. All she could say. He left me. And she deserved it. Reverie sucked in a shaking breath and felt the tears begin anew.

Her betrayal was palpable. She seemed both shocked and hurt, and Moss wouldn't forgive Lestan for saddling his wife with these feelings, especially given the fact she was expecting to have his children. Whatever his reasons were, she decided they wouldn't suffice, not when it caused Reverie this much misery. 

It pained Moss to know Reverie had cared deeply for the man, and selfishly, she wondered if she would merit the same tears if some undeniable force took her away from Swiftcurrent Creek as well. She felt entitled to be here, at Reverie's side- nothing else called to her. Nothing else drew her away. When Reverie was in distress and in need of someone, Moss didn't leave. 

"Fuck him." She said bluntly, and lay her muzzle across Reverie's shoulders.

Gone.
He was gone.
Reverie nodded numbly as Moss spoke, though she didn't really hear her. How would she ever go on? How could she raise his children, how could she look at them every day and be reminded of him? She would love them, she knew. It would hurt. And maybe that hurt would drive her over the edge, maybe this was the piece that needed to fall into place for her to finally —
I'm thinking of ending things, Reverie murmured, too faint for Moss to hear. So quiet that the words simply dispersed into the air, a whispered declaration to the universe. The new life in her would not protest, could not protest, and so she felt no guilt. Her gaze wandered away from Moss, and she found herself pressing closer, tucking herself against the woman with a fragile aspect to the touch as if she might shatter into a million pieces at any moment. Her next words were louder. Stay with me. Please.
I'm afraid of what I might do, And now she really saw Moss, really looked at her, eyes red and still brimming with tears. To them. To myself. To anyone who gets too close.
All she knew how to do was cause pain.

It brought her a surge of pride to hear that Reverie would conclude this chapter in her life that had involved Lestan. She felt it would be better for Reverie to have him out of her life, and be with someone she could rely on. She didn't particularly care how the fallout might reflect on her; she'd weather whatever criticism she faced bravely, with Reverie at her side. 

She nodded in agreement, content to fix herself to Reverie's side, and supply her every need and whim. But she began to realize that Reverie feared other things than her pregnancy, and what might happen when she broke off her relationship with Lestan. She became concerned, and knew not to overlook what it was Reverie was telling her. 

"I'll stay. I'll take care of you," She said, before adding "And the kids." She hadn't thought about it much, even though she had already informed Reverie that she would step in as a caregiver for the children. But now, it was something to think about, something to wonder about. How many kids would there be? What would they be named? She'd never considered herself fit for the role of parenting, but was surprised to find that the idea of being a parent was oddly exciting. "Have a dozen of them, if you want. I'm not going anywhere."

I'll take care of you. Reverie was reminded sharply of Lestan's words, his declaration that his wanting to take care of her did not mean she was not his equal. She did not want to be taken care of. That was not love, not to her, but no one seemed to understand — even Moss.
What Reverie wanted, more than anything, was for someone to see that she was capable of taking care of herself. She just needed time. Still, she knew that motherhood would be a different problem to contend with entirely. She would not be able to care for herself through this. She would need help. But... what if she drove Moss away, too?
Even if I'm never normal? Lestan promised that he would stay, that he would marry me - but he left because - Reverie's throat caught on the words and she had to force them out. Because I'm crazy. Because I don't know how to be happy, or trust anyone, and because I always run away. I was making him miserable, and I'm afraid I'll do the same to you.
She buried her face in her forelegs with a small sound of misery. I should see a healer. I should. Maybe they can fix me. Maybe if I was normal - Then Lestan would still want me.
Moss managed to soothe her, somehow. Reverie eventually calmed enough to make plans, real plans, to see a healer. One from Riverclan, perhaps. That would be best. But as the days wore on, Reverie would begin to question this decision — and eventually turn back on it entirely.