Broken Antler Fen Nice Dream

@Ibis 

Wraen did not keep a close scrutiny of the wolves, who had gathered here, but she did check in once in a while to see, how each pledged member was doing and whether they needed any help or just company. And it did not escape her notice that now instead of two daughters she now caught sight of only one. Arielle had always seemed quieter and more withdrawn than her counterpart and in the beginning the older wolf thought that maybe she hung around elsewhere, away from the people. But still this explanation did not feel entirely plausible to her. 

Therefore she decided to find Ibis and ask, whether there was any base for her worries and if so - what had happened. If a child had disappeared entirely, then with all the recent snowfall here, it was impossible to track her down on their own. But they had friends here in Redhawks and further South. Sending out a messenger to look out for a young lost wolf would be the best thing to do. Before any action was taken - girl's mother had the first say in the matter. So Wraen made her way to the dens and then would expand her search from there.

Having returned to the rendezvous site where she could attend her daughter, Ibis tried to keep herself level-headed and high-spirited whenever Lilitu's attention was upon her; it was difficult, and in seeing that difficulty Akavir drew their daughter away for some private time together. Once they had dispersed Ibis set about cleaning up the den. In her mind she was merely tidying the space in preparation for Arielle's return.

It was during this cleansing of the burrow that Wraen approached from further afield. Ibis was busy extending the hollow with cautious scrapes of her claws, presuming that when Arielle returned she would be a little bigger, and maybe want her own space. Whether it was a mother's hope or her denial which fueled her actions, Ibis was hard at work.

She popped her head out of the den when the sound of crunching snow piqued her interest. Digging was hard, the ground was cold and solid, and she was glad for a break — but also a little disoriented from her private grief.

Thinking it was her husband returning with Lilitu (and briefly wondering if he would come with Arielle too, having found her hiding somewhere in the fen they had not checked yet) Ibis was briefly crestfallen when she recognized Wraen instead.

Wraen knew that her instinct had been right, the moment she met Ibis face to face. That quick change from, what she perceived to be hopeful, to disappointed was a proof of that. "Ibis, hey," she greeted her niece, not knowing, how to proceed. Her recent fallout with Bronco had made her a little insecure about her communication and people skills. Last thing she wanted was to be accused of belittling other people feelings or simply sounding wrong. 

"I noticed that Arielle is not around," she finally went with, what was not exactly the best, but would save a lot of other awkward things. "Is everything alright?" she asked. Sure, it was not, but it was at least something. If Ibis wanted (and Wraen hoped she would), she would fill in the rest of the story.

Upon realizing it was Wraen, Ibis gave a quick look around to make sure Akavir and Liilitu were out of earshot; she trusted her husband would keep their remaining daughter safe and happy for the time being, but the rest of the pack would catch on to the heightened neuroticism that Ibis exuded.

On a good day she was overprotective; in this instance as she climbed from the den, she was so distracted by the act of keeping busy that Ibis did not even shake the dirt from her shoulders, or try to tidy herself up at all, as she moved closer to Wraen.

The woman's observation was followed by a question, slowly chipping away at the weak veneer of Ibis' calm. No, she half squawked, then as Ibis took a breath to steady herself a barely contained cry burst from her chest. She's... She's missing. It hurt to admit it out loud. Hastily the young mother adds, We can't tell Lilitu, it would break her heart.

"I understand," Wraen replied levelly, feeling sympathy for Ibis. She knew that having never had kids of her own, she could not fully understand the extent of the mother's worry and pain, but there had been enough people dear to her that had walked out of her life and disappeared without a trace. She could share the sentiment at least. 

"Would you like me walk over to Redhawks and alert them to keep their eyes open, in case they spot her?" she suggested, thinking that, while there was not much she could say to her niece to make her feel better, she could at least offer some help. "They have ties to Frosthawks and Tri... something pack down South - from what I understand, they visit each other time from time,"  she went on.

"And I could..." she had been about to mention Bronco, but they were no longer on good terms with each other. Maia - on the other hand... "Maia could go over to Firefly Glen and Moonspear, even visit Neverwinter forest up North and tell them, what has happened," Wraen told. "But that is your decision to make - I will be glad to be useful and help you, but only if you say so."

She grit her teeth, trying to keep herself composed.

This wasn't the first loss she'd faced after all. Not the first loved one of her family to vanish, or fates forbid die — Ibis tried to fight the thought as it surfaced, white-knuckling through it; her eyes averted, a shuddering breath briefly inflating her.

Th-thank you, she breathed, shutting her eyes. She held the pain closer than she should have, but it was an intimate thing, a creature she knew well. As she sighed the weight did not leave her body but Ibis steeled herself within the feeling, focusing, listening.

The offer was a good one.

To have so many eyes and ears out there hunting was good, it was more than she'd ever had available to her for any other loss. What if... What if they don't... her voice is shaking, she can't help it now — the rest of her quivers, too.

No; she cannot think like that.

What was the right answer to that question in this particular situation? Wraen knew that there was nothing she could tell Ibis that would make her feel better, she could not give her reassurances or get her hopes high up. She tried to remember, what had she done, when Elfie had gone missing? Nothing much. Just waited for his return, until a certain period of time other daily things filled her life and mind and she no longer thought about him every day. She had never asked, if Eljay or Weejay had eventually given up on seeing their relative ever alive. It had taken so much time for the Blackthorn man to recover from all the losses, that there had never been a good time for this inquiry.

Now she regretted that she had not harvested that knowledge, when there had still been a chance to do so. And she was sorry that Eljay was not here with them to talk with Ibis now, because, who else would understand one parent's sorrow better as a parent, who too had lost a child? "We do all we can and we wait for her to return," she said eventually. "There's no promise in that, no certainty and it is something we'll have to live every day," she added. "But to live without hope would be far worse. At the moment we can simply pass a word around," she looked at the broken woman sympathetically and moved as if to give her a hug, if she was to accept it.

There was nothing she could do now but keep busy. Wraen was right; the only option was to wait and see what fate held in store for her, for the family, for the entire lot of them. Word would travel through the region of the missing girl and Ibis had to stay strong in her hope that she would be found and returned.

Perhaps she should ask Akavir to go out looking — he was more formidable a creature than she, Ibis thought. He would surely know where to look. The thought placated her.

Although she hung her head and looked utterly miserable, Ibis pulled herself from the den fully and found comfort beside Wraen. The hug was reciprocated. Thank you. I'll.. I'll do my best to stay positive. I never thought I would lose one of my girls, its... Its my worst fear, truthfully. A sheen of tears caught across her vision as she voiced this.

"Ibis, you do not have to pretend to be positive, when you do not feel like it," Wraen told her after a moment of silence between them. "If need be, take time off or away from everyone," she said, but the decision would be hers alone. It then occurred that there was a problem with not telling Lilitu. In that case - what were they going to tell other pack members? If Wraen or Maia went around other packs telling that a child had gone missing, then, how would that prevent a situation, where the truth leaked over?

"I think that you will have to tell the truth to Lilitu eventually," she said quietly. "Once we reveal this to other adults here and warn other packs to keep an eye out for her - she will learn everything at some point. And it will be far worse to not only feel heartbroken about a missing sibling but disappointed as well that she had been lied to. Even if it had been in her best interests," she told. "Just choose the timing wisely." 

The concept - that she did not need to stay positive at all times - had never occurred to Ibis. Sure, she had longed for the freedom to do so, but having lived her life in the public eye in one way or another (as an ambassador to pack leaders or as a leader herself) it had always seemed impossible. Hearing Wraen say otherwise, listening to her essentially giving Ibis permission, caused a small sob to erupt from the young mother. She drew in a shaky breath to try to quiet herself but nodded at Wraen's futher suggestions.

I know. I know, I have to tell Lilitu eventually. I don't want to lie to her, and she is.. She is so bright, my little girl. For a long time it has been the two of them though and I know how painful it was to lose my own family, piece by piece. I never.. I never wanted either of my girls to go through that. But there was no avoiding it now; Arielle was gone and unless someone found her or she returned, in the dead of winter, Ibis knew not to extend too much hope.

Thank you for your support, auntie. Ibis managed after a moment, and turned her attention to the ground, the dirt streaking her paws. I think I will go back to tidying. I'll find Akavir when he returns from his patrol, ask him to go out and look for her. When you do send out word to our... our allies, I would like to.. Stay here. Just in case they come home.

"I understand," she murmured, listening to her niece sharing her sadness about the whole situation. Not too long ago Ibis too had started out as a bright little child, not burdened by the weight of the world on her shoulders. And just like that her parents had also wanted to protect her from all harm, but looking back it was evident that such hopes were unrealistic. Fate always found a way, how to punch one in the most painful way possible.

"No problem," Wraen nodded in agreement and sensing that  Ibis now wanted to be alone now, got to her feet ready to go. They would discuss matters of the pack another time. "If there is anything you need, just tell me. I'll be around," she told. "I will find Maia - see if she is up to travelling northwards and I will make a journey to Redhawks myself," she promised.  

"Take care, kid!" she smiled at the girl one last time and left.