Wheeling Gull Isle she’s a 10 but…

The seawater felt incredible on his weary feet. As eager as he was to see @Heda, Caracal crossed the submerged sandbar slowly, letting the ocean swirl around his ankles. When he finally waded onto the beach, he dug his toes into the soft sands, set down the object he carried in his mouth and released a happy sigh.

Honey, he called, breaking the island’s morning stillness, I’m home!

He just hoped she was back too. There was so much to tell her about his trip. Moreover, he wanted to hear about her visit to Sapphique. He wondered about Mireille and the rest of the wolves on the sea cliffs. Were they okay? Would the pack recover from the attack?

He looked down at the souvenir he’d brought home with him, an old turtle shell he’d found. It was cracked but in good shape otherwise. It even held water; he’d tested it. Caracal traced a toe over the grooved carapace, wondering if Heda would like it.

my single thread is not even very far but i couldnt resist

also i made them a map for the very top of the greenhills, lol

heda wondered when the lavender would bloom. the island remained largely blanketed with snow, though sweetharbor had the beautiful detail of holding sunshine on one side and then another as the day went on. you only needed to follow the rays as they sparkled upon the land.
she had come back with more sober news but a sense of pride in her friend.
when caracal called out, heda was in the middle of transporting lavender and chamomile root to her shelter atop the greenhills. she set down her gathering and for a moment only listened before she tilted her muzzle into the saltwind and sent a message back.
come up

Heda returned his call, summoning him to the island’s apex. Caracal hastily gathered up the shell and loped up the hillside. He scaled the small cliff where she kept her shelter and found her there with a bundle of herbs at her feet.

Sidling forward, he placed the shell on the ground and, on a whim, nipped the herbs into it. There was room for plenty more. Perhaps this vessel would allow her to transport far greater amounts. Caracal had only thought to use it as a makeshift water ladle.

Straightening, he caught Heda’s eye and said, Hey, and then, I missed you, as he moved in to kiss the corner of her eye. How was your trip?

The map is lovely! And don’t feel obligated to post. If you want your other thread to progress a bit, this one can wait.

i want them both & shant deny either lmfao thank u for understanding tho <333

caracal came to find her, carrying something and flushed with the scents from his travels. heda watched in interest as he grabbed the things she had been carrying, to demonstrate the item's versatility.
a turtle's shell! far smaller than psalm, and waterproof to boot, she would bet. heda nudged the newly made planter against the outer wall of the den and shyly lifted her face to receive his kiss.
"it was not a long visit. they're — recovering." and there was more to say on that, except her heart felt as though it might emerge from her chest; heda in a very rare show of forwardness pulled caracal toward her to kiss him again, properly and for a moment that lingered.

He could’ve used the very same words to describe his own expedition. Caracal would get around to that but, for now, he wanted to hear more about Heda’s experience. He supposed it was good that Sapphique was recovering but what did that look like? What did it mean?

Before he could press for details, she pulled him toward her. Caracal went willingly, brows raising in slight surprise when she kissed him soundly. His lips then curved into a smile as they parted. His eyes were warm as they flicked between each of hers. Without being particularly aware he was doing it, Caracal brought up his free leg to touch at the red fur at the back of her neck.

How is Mireille? he asked.

He thought of crossing paths with the red she-wolf some nights past. She had been distraught. Was she better now that she was reunited with her pack and their home? What had she found when she’d returned to Sapphique? His eyes—one clear, the other cloudy—were filled with questions as he waited to hear more.

"sad." heda shut her eyes and fell away from caracal a little, turning to face the lovely fierce sea which swept all around their island. "she lost a mother and a brother to the bear. her other mom is — well she's gone, maybe after the bear. they're looking for her now."
heda thought back to when the very mention of fathers had rankled her. now it seemed the lack of peace was in her scarlet friend now, butting against hatred and the malaise of grief.
"i'll have to go back, sometime soon." she did not say we simply because she was unsure if caracal was even welcome.
red-backed ears twitched toward the other wolf. "how was yours?" heda hoped for better news.

He sagged a little when Heda spoke of Mireille’s losses. It took him a few beats to realize exactly who she meant: Erzulie and Rosalyn. He mouthed their names, though no sound escaped his lips. And who was the brother? Was it the very same one Heda had mentioned as a possible match before?

I can’t remember if I told you this but Erzulie and Rosalyn, Caracal said, they are—or were—my grandmothers. I barely knew them, he was quick to add, lest she redirect her pity to him when it belonged to Mireille. But still… damn.

He nodded when she said she’d go back soon. Perhaps he’d go with her, though only if Heda wanted him to come along. He wasn’t sure Mireille would want to see him and, well, if Erzulie wasn’t there to welcome him and Meerkat no longer lived there, then that bear had cut many of Caracal’s ties to Sapphique.

Oh, he said when she prompted him about his own trip, it was kind of sad too, to be honest. My youngest sister, Leo, died. I never even met her but it’s really fucked up my mom’s family unit, understandably. I think they’ll be alright but I just… He paused for a moment, searching for words. I just hope I never have to know what that’s like, you know?

His toes were still gently wound in Heda’s nape. Caracal cupped the back of her neck a moment, then let his foreleg drop. This had turned out to be quite the heavy reunion, so he sought after something a little more uplifting to say.

I caught up with Killer too. He was my best buddy growing up and my OG travel companion. So that was nice. I told him about you.

his grandmothers.
even though he had not known them, it must have engendered something in caracal to experience the loss. and so her eyes were soft on him, listening to the rest of what her courting-man wanted to say.
his sister had also died! now heda's eyes did well with some emotion she had only just felt; throat scratching as his paw pulled away and she was left without the warmth of his touch.
"you — learned a lot of sad things, caracal," heda said softly. "i would love to meet killer. one day."
but the gold of her eyes was for him, and she set her gaze on him with soft wondering.
"you can — you can tell me anything, you know. about anything."

I invited him and his mom—my older sister, Fennec—to visit us here, he told her.

He thought about their predicament a moment and decided against sharing it, lest he bring down the room any further. But then Heda reminded him he could tell her anything. His eyes caught hers and he let out a breath, then nodded.

I know, he said quietly, and I’ll tell you more about the drama they’re dealing with… soonish. But right now, I kinda just wanna enjoy your company for a little bit. And maybe, he continued in the next breath, we could talk about this? and motioned between the two of them with a little smile.

about them. about this. heda ducked her head with a smile not easily hidden, a flush chasing itself along her cheekbones.
"i would be really happy to meet them."
courting. they were courting. heda thought of her dream and of caracal's recent admission to her. was he weighing his options with her or did he have others in mind?
her dream.
the landscape rippled with salt breeze. "do you want children, caracal?" her eyes were gentle but curious.

There were some steps in between where they were now and parenthood, though it was a valid question. If they weren’t on the same page about kids, after all, there was probably no point pursuing a romantic connection.

Definitely, he answered without hesitation, adding, I’ve thought about it a lot, actually. I love kids but I wasn’t sure I was the type to ‘settle down,’ you know? But I’ve thought about what it’d be like to live on this island with you, raise some pups here. It’s kind of intimidating, honestly, but also it sounds kind of incredible.

From past conversations, he already knew Heda wanted children. “I—I’ve decided to have children and raise them here, Caracal.” At the time, she’d mentioned Mireille’s brother, perhaps the very same one who had recently died. A lot had changed since then, although the fundamentals had stayed the same: they still had one another, and the island.

Thinking about that conversation—how she’d burst into tears, then begged him to kiss her—suddenly stoked a fire in Caracal’s belly. He wanted to kiss her again now, though not a tender peck on the forehead. He wanted to properly kiss her, then explore even further than that… but, of course, that begged a question.

Have you ever… he began, then laughed at his own hesitation before completing his sentence, been with anyone?

in a rush of amusement, heda wondered what caracal might say if she told him that she had dreamed of four.
what he asked next however, stampeded any coherent thought from her mind, and she simply sat staring at his crimson face with a half-dozen emotions passing over her countenance.
the first, surprise! why did he ask? heda now thought madly, suppose he already had! 
the second, embarrassment. she had not been taught these things, but she had seen the animals around her, round with pregnancy or coupling in the open beforehand.
the young sweetharborian was not ignorant of the act itself, she simply did not yet connect it to conception. and it had always seemed rushed and brutish to heda. did caracal want that with her?
the third, shame, shame at her sudden interest and the way her eyes of their own accord moved to the rangy strength of his shoulders before she yanked her gaze toward the sea.
a fourth, anxiety; a fifth, desire.
the sixth, something unknowable and unsaid.
"n-no," she stammered eloquently at last. "i uhum, i always thought it might be — well, something you did after you married."

He saw so many different expressions drift across her face, he wasn’t sure what Heda might be thinking. Caracal fidgeted, wondering if he’d overstepped a boundary. But she’d told him they could talk about anything and this was an important topic to cover if they were going down this road…

Her answer came in a stammer and included a caveat he hadn’t quite expected. Caracal ignored this for the moment, allowing himself to feel a measure of relief as he grabbed for her nearer paw with one of his.

Oh, good, me neither, he admitted, sharing a sort of dorky smile with her.

So they could figure out that part together… after they married. He was glad he’d asked before he proposed they practice their moves. The fire in his belly dimmed a little—and he would be a big, fat liar if Caracal said he wasn’t slightly disappointed—but he thought he could respect Heda’s wishes.

So, I don’t really know what I’m doing with that or, like, any of this, Caracal decided to confess while he was on a roll. I just know I want to be with you and eventually put some babies in you, if that’s also what you want.

He squeezed her paw, suddenly wondering exactly how she felt about him and all of this propositioning. Caracal didn’t really know if she liked him the same way he liked her. She had been in love with Bartholomew not so long ago. His heart jumped into his throat.

heda gratefully took his paw, though the expression on her face froze at his thoroughly biological description. it mirrored her earlier thoughts on the frenzied selfishness she had seen other beasts engage.
if you had asked, heda was not a romantic. her lover was the island, the touch of sun and sand her only caress. but one day perhaps she thought bartholomew might have made more of his soft embraces than what they had been.
it was a surrender, a moment of complete vulnerability that heda felt sickened to even consider with someone she had not loved so deeply.
a sea breeze rose and traced her cheek with a wavering and invisible trailing of fingers which lifted her fur.
heda slowly pulled away from caracal, expression tightening with some sensation she could not have worded in that milisecond had she a larger vocabulary.
she didn't want babies put into her. she wanted a marriage before god and island where her children would be raised with the same psalms that bartholomew had taught to her. 
maybe in essence it was he she wanted.
heda cleared her throat, chancing a glance at caracal in case his features had fallen into dismay, unable to articulate exactly how his wording had made her feel. "i don't think i want to — do that. not for a long time." her voice shook, and again the leaping glissade that something was wrong, that she was the problem.

He saw the moment her face froze. When she began to pull away from him, Caracal resisted the impulse to grab her paw and cling. Heart now sinking into his stomach, he pulled both forelegs closer to himself. He took a breath, waiting for her to say something.

When she did, he felt the crushing blow of disappointment. She didn’t want him. She didn’t want this. He felt like he’d fucked up somehow, maybe by bringing up intimacy. Caracal’s mouth opened and closed, his thoughts whirling like a hurricane.

Eventually, he had the presence of mind to ask, You don’t want to do what, exactly? Lay it to me straight, he coaxed with a sad smile. I want to be sure I understand.

it would have been easier if caracal had gotten upset and stormed off. but that wasn't the kind of person he was. instead he gave her the distance and asked softly for her to clarify. heda's ears splayed in relief and dismay. she stared down at the saltwater fed sedges between them, knowing one day the wind curling up to she and caracal would be rife with the scent of flowers.
of lavender and sea-rose and anemone, of heather and the fragrance of fruiting trees. 
"i had a dream, a while ago. it was — it showed me that i would be a mother." here went nothing. softly she straightened, turning her gilded eyes on him once more. "but i didn't really understand it, not really. it was about — creating pieces of myself that turned into suns and moons. i —" a soft laugh. "i think one of those were yours. the — shapes."
she knew she wasn't making sense and felt the unsurety of it. "you're part of whatever this is, caracal. so am i. but it's more than us," and now she slid her paws toward his, willing him to take them once more. "it's not about us. it's about what god wants. it's about what is best for sweetharbor."
her voice was gathering a still soft power.
"i need you to stand with me in his light if we are going to go forward. everything we do here is sacred. including marrying or b-being together."

He didn’t just want her to be frank, he needed the clarity. When Heda spoke, he listened closely, though he wasn’t entirely sure he was following. He tried, though mostly Caracal got caught up in the mentions of his own involvement. His heart pounded with a confused sort of hope, especially when she grasped for his paw again. He took hers instantly between his own.

Well, I definitely don’t have any arguments with God or Sweetharbor, he said, wondering if that was a silly thing to say. He then went on to admit, I’m not totally sure I understand but… I want to, Heda. If you can bear with me, I want to figure this out, like I promised you we would, he finished earnestly.

He raised their gathered paws and kissed the knuckles of her pale toes. Just tell me what I need to do, his eyes said.

heda smiled and let her breath out gently. "good. that's — i want that too," she said with a look that attempted to smooth over this disturbed sand for an easier mien. 
what she wanted was piety.
and she had no word for that.
at once she stood and dusted grass from her flanks. "come with me," heda invited, and set a winding course from them all the way to the small cave out of which a stream of freshwater drifted down to the sea.
the sea wind tore at she and caracal. "this is the lion's den. it's where bartholomew wrestled with god and was reborn."

She said she wanted this too, restoring Caracal’s hope for a future alongside Heda. He sensed a caveat coming, though he would do anything she asked of him, regardless of romantic implications. Heda was his closest friend.

When bade to come with her, he quickly complied. Heda led him to a cave with which he was passingly familiar. He peered at it, then gazed at her inquisitively. The expression only intensified at her words. The mention of Bartholomew had him chewing at the inside of his cheek.

Truthfully, he wasn’t entirely sure what to say to that. So Caracal merely nodded in acknowledgment, then waited to see where this was going.

heda stepped inside. the roof was damp from melting snow. she turned to look at her contemplative companion, then scanned the interior of the den.
"i think god comes to talk here," she murmured, golden eyes flickering toward him. a thought took half-form, and eventually she gestured caracal closer. "i — i think you should stay here for a night or so." it might have been a foreign idea to him.
but if heda was going to proceed, it was with both of them touched by the honored light which had so filled her days on the island. "you don't — you don't have to do it," she said quietly. "but i want you to stay alone for a little while. i'm going to leave for a few days."
her eyes sought his own. "this is how god came to me. he will come to you too, caracal."

Heda spoke softly and he listened to every word. Caracal didn’t reply right away, casting his eyes around the cave’s damp interior as he padded after her. It wouldn’t be the most comfortable night of his life, though he didn’t think it was that big of an ask. He couldn’t be sure what would truly come of it and he knew he’d miss her, after already spending time apart. But he gave it some thought before deciding.

Hmmm, okay, I can do that, he told her, bumping her cheek with his nose. I’ll miss you but I’m cool to hang with God for a lil’ bit, he added, hoping his casual tone wouldn’t somehow offend her.

He returned to looking around the cavern, stepping softly alongside the flow of water. Caracal bent to dip his tongue in it, noting that it was fresh with a hint of brine. He meandered further into its depths, eyes squinting in the gloom, and when he turned back to look at Heda, she was a dark silhouette back-lit by the white February sky.

See you in a couple days? he said, wondering where Heda meant to go in the meantime but deciding to let her volunteer that information if she wished before leaving him here.

heda smiled to see him take easily to it.
her eyes were warm on him. "see you. i'm going to see if i can find a herd on the mainland." it had been a long while since she had tasted venison, and she was interested to know if they had a chance.
there was a great reluctance in her to leave, but leave she would.
sweetharbor would cradle caracal, would give him a dream. this she must believe.
heda tossed him a kiss before she disappeared from the denmouth into the light.