Hideaway Strath More today than yesterday

-I'm sure it's fine,- Towhee answered distractedly. She looked at their surroundings pensively. She should head out and start reinforcing the borders while her brother took care of establishing caches. But the mercenary found herself locked in place, her orange eyes suddenly glazing even as she gazed off into the trees.

Between placing her trust in Phox (and therefore not bothering with the particulars for this new pack) and dealing with the real and imagined fallout of their decision, Towhee hadn't actually thought ahead. Being here now made it all real. She felt a tightness in her chest and sat, trying to steady her suddenly uneven breathing.

They hadn't brought anyone else with them. Did they plan to recruit? Or was it just going to be the four of them? Was she a leader here? Towhee didn't even know. Her mind cast back to the plateau, to her last conversation with Raven, then further back, to the confrontation with Tegan. Towhee sank to the ground, breathing fast and shallow. Had she really left the Redhawks?

And what happened when Fig and Fen grew up? What if Phox found another mate and they had more kids? Where would that leave her? She could see Tegan's lips in her mind, forming the words: "You can't play house with your own fucking brother, Towhee." Why hadn't she thought to look ahead until now?

I've made a terrible mistake, Towhee thought as the panic attack seized her and she curled into a ball on the ground, silent and motionless save for her rapid breathing.