Blacktail Deer Plateau when you look at me, i'll be digesting your legs

tags just for reference

the trio of merry-making murderers headed south, caiaphas among them. they were not poor company; she delighted in the wickedness of @Merrick, and his lack of scrupulous standards that struck the terror of god into lesser folk. here she could tell him of all that transpired since she left ankyra, and he only tittered, not tattled.

astara was a less exciting companion, but if there was one virtue about the blackbird it was her eminent silence. occasionally caiaphas caught her prowling ahead, that flash of purple eyes between the pines -- and marveled how seamlessly the little predator scouted ahead.

it was when they encountered the scent of a pack that caiaphas' heart froze. she commanded both to stop with a muffled bark, ears pushed ahead; the scent of her daughter, of aningan, erzulie -- wolves she never thought she would see again. wolves she had assumed killed by her beloved sound.

she made motion besides the trail for her companions to leave her be; stepping out into the thinning treeline the crone felt her heart pulse in her chest out of joy, her thoughts rushing -- without much ceremony the siren tipped back her darkened head and howled, almost joyously, for all within.

And like that, it was like she never was away.  Her family was small, and broken, but to those left she was attentive.  She allowed them to consume her, hearing of their travels west, the fate of the sound.  Rosalyn found no real care in her for Rusalka or the ones disappeared who were not her children.  She and Erzulie were of one mind in that; they would remain, but they would do so for themselves and no others.

Caiaphas' voice.

It struck her as she strode along the plateau's edge, her head lifted to observe the lands below.  She'd not put on much weight with the scarcity, but for the first time in weeks she was groomed and had a clear, wakeful glint to her gaze.  It hardened, turning icy with the joy in that call.

No.

Her fur lifted and she ran, coming to view before the woman with her lips lifted and teeth bared.  Rosalyn had no doubts now; the witch heralded nothing but calamity.  She would not taint her family again.

Leave.  Just one word, abrupt.  But there was a promise behind it.  If she didn't, Rosalyn would not hesitate to make her.  It did not matter these lands were not her own.

Not a day went by where he did not think about the wayward siren. Being found by her all those months ago, being brought to the coast—the event was the greatest to occur in his life, save for the meeting of the uppik, and he felt he could never repay her for the kindness shown that day. A boy without a home was turned into a wolf with a family of sorts, in a pack where he was not so easily looked over or blatantly ignored. She gave him a place to belong and, for that, he would always be loyal to her to some degree.

And when he heard her voice, his heart all but stopped.

At first, he wasn’t sure if he was hearing correctly. Maybe it was just someone that sounded similar, another wolf looking to settle with them. But as the seconds ticked by and the sound resonated within his mind, he knew it was her. There was not a single doubt in his mind—Caiaphas was home.

What began as a steady jog quickly turned into an unbridled sprint, holding nothing back; he nearly stumbled over his own feet a few times, the speed mixed with the movement momentarily disagreeing. But he righted himself quickly and was soon hurdling his body towards her, hardly noticing Rosalyn there, let alone taking notice to her overall posture. All he could think about was how his wish finally came true and he was able to see the woman again. He couldn’t keep his tail from wagging as he greeted her with a cheery, “Âha! I knew you would find us!” And only after that did he notice the other woman and acknowledge her, though stealing a look in her direction only awarded him with confusion. What was wrong? Wasn’t she happy? His brows pinched together, betraying his lack of understanding—but he was soon back to staring at Caiaphas, too excited to have her back to dwell on whatever was going on between them.

Hardest post I've ever written? ✔

Many calls Raleska had heard in her time by their new borders, and many faces she had seen come a part of her life, and then leave. Like the flash of a comet as it streaked across the violet sky; there in an instant, brilliant, beautiful, and then gone.

She had resigned herself a long time ago to believing that the wolves in her life were temporary, and her life seemingly interminable - they would shuffle in and out of focus and view, sometimes temporarily, sometimes forever -- and since, she had learned to close her heart to the bruising punches of the world.

But one howl she had not expected; one howl was all it took for the armored part of her to crack, to split - until she found herself walking and then trotting and then jogging and then galloping - towards a howl she knew and loved and hated at once.

No amount of inner training could have made Raleska stand straight and hide her pains that day, as she looked upon her mother, her idol, her blood -- and saw not a hero worthy of idolatry, but a shunned and miserable crone that brought nothing but hellfire on her heels. On their heels, too.

Raleska knew before she even saw Caiaphas, that whoever greeted her was apt to do so contentiously. She saw Rosalyn first, the proud and defiant way her mentor stood -- and then Aningan, confused, but welcoming. Raleska's heart was pounding and she was sure all of them could hear it over the distant roar of the sea; if they could not hear it, they could certain see it -- by the blanched and shellshocked way she seemed to walk, as if lost of all composure.

She met her mother's gaze and again somewhere, that armor splintered - until she was just a little cub looking back at her dam. Yet, Raleska knew what must be done - and it broke her heart to do so.

"Please leave." She found herself standing next to Rosalyn while what remained of her composure fractured into a thousand pieces around her. Rosalyn would be her stone - and while only freshly returned herself, Rosalyn had brought none of the grief to their little home that Caiaphas had. To stand in front of her mother, the last of her family, and speak so -- why, it broke Raleska clean in two.

Yet she would not back down; split or not. She had fought too hard to stay with her family, while her family had fucked off to who knows where -- family, she had found, was not just blood -- it was those you chose around you.. and Raleska chose Caiaphas no longer.

two years ago -- maybe even one -- no one could have stood before caiaphas and told her to leave. yet two years ago, caiaphas had had everything, and stood to lose it all in a single moment's heartbeat.

a mate.

a home.

four children of her own blood.

and now, she had nothing. a dead mate. a destroyed home. children scattered to the four winds, save for one, who stood before her somehow as rosalyn's stalwart and not her own mother's.

the joy that had bloomed in her gaze to see aningan died; withering in the manner of a rose subjected to the obscene. in her heart hate pumped its riotous fuel -- she had done all of this for her family, her legacy -- and in turn was met with their backs.

couldn't they see that? couldn't they understand, that those that had wronged them (and gods, there had been so many) deserved an end to their days? that living and hiding and hoping their enemies would not return was no way to live?

caiaphas could see in rosalyn and raleska, that point had never hit home.

rosalyn caiaphas had never loved. she had come to accept, and then begrudgingly respect, for the positive role the woman had played in her only daughter's life. all of those emotions now curdled, turned to ash in an instant on her tongue. her daughter begging her to leave was perhaps the cruelest cut of all -- for a long while caiaphas lifted her leering gaze, and looked upon the three of them with a chilling sense of growing grief.

no lingered on the tip of her tongue, waiting to be lashed in the face of her longest adversary. yet if she said no, she might stand to lose the last thing that was important to her -- her life. she had lost everything else, but her life, caiaphas would never forfeit.

a wrinkled sneer rose to her muzzle. any spearing riposte she had formulated to thrust into rosalyn's insufferable face had faded. if she was to be thrown to the dogs, she would not beg.

her gaze softened as it passed over aningan, and then hardened and lingered the longest on her daughter. betrayer. traitor. perhaps this was caiaphas' last come to grief moment -- the final possession she needed to shed to become whatever hideous thing it was the gods had in store for her. with nothing left to lose, what good could come of her final days?

a steely look overcame her. no, there was nothing left for her here.

in a dash of slurried grey, caiaphas fled rusalka.

As Caiaphas stared, Rosalyn met her gaze when it came her way, rigid.  Time seemed to slow.

There was an absolute knowledge in her that if Caiaphas was to return, she would spell their end.  Perhaps not now... but eventually.  She'd shown her motives to be entirely her own too many times, and rather than allow herself to be place to the fate of the witch's whims, Rosalyn would show her teeth.  Caiaphas could take her grudges and her plots elsewhere.  After a life of snatching and clawing for what life would give her, the pirate wanted nothing more than to hold the family she had left and be left alone.

But as Raleska joined her, unexpectedly, Rosalyn felt a sharp and powerful surge of triumph.  Mine, not yours..  Her mentee before only because knowing her mother prevented more.  How could she open her heart to a daughter when she turned to Caiaphas?  But the instant she turned on her mother, joining at Rosalyn's side, the pirate shifted closer.  If she were ever to have a daughter of her own blood, Raleska was it now.

There was no masking the triumph and pride in her golden eyes as Caiaphas turned and left without argument.  She did not care what Aninigan thought - this was how it needed to be.  She did, however, turn and press her muzzle to Raleska's shoulder.  Only once, firmly, in silent solidarity and thanks.  This was right.

Relief to excitement.

Excitement to confusion.

Confusion to sorrow—

—what were they saying?

Please leave—the second the words left her mouth, Aningan’s gaze snapped to Raleska. Why did she say that? Why was she not happy to have Caiaphas back—why did she want her to leave when she only just came home? His body tensed up and trembled, a mixture of emotions wreaking total and unrestrained havoc on the young male. All he wanted to do was reach out to the woman, his saviour, and invite her home; this was her home, her pack, her family—he was merely watching over them until her return. But no one else seemed to hold the same loyalty to her, showcasing their anger and the true colours of traitorous intentions.

Why couldn’t he have her back home?

Aningan was ready to approach her, to take to her side and offer his support. But the lack of welcoming embraces to greet her, replaced by disdain, was louder than his own desires. When her gaze fell on him, he pleaded with her, silent but relentless—but it wasn’t enough. It wasn’t enough to make her stay, back turned on him as she retreated into the unknown. He took a step in her direction, eager to follow her wherever she might go, but a single step was all he could will his legs to take; he longed for her return, the belief that she would find her way back home the only thing to push him to challenge the former beast of a leader, back on the coast. But despite the reasoning behind his challenge, he still won and was still the acting leader—and he couldn’t bring himself to abandon those that remained, no matter how desperate he was to run after the siren’s retreating form. All he could do was stare after her, muscles rigid and ears pinned back, an ever-growing lump in his throat.

Unable to move forward or back, to chase after her or turn on the other two women; lost again in time, a piece of his family taken away.

Raleska held true, expecting a fight.

To be met instead with... god, she didn't even have a word for it --- what was it, if it wasn't giving up?

Somehow, to be met with no push back at all, was worse than the fight she had prepared for. Raleska felt like she had just shoved into an opponent, only to have it yield immediately -- the leering of her mother's gaze was met with tears brimming her eyes, but Raleska did not look away.

And then to see Ani, poor Ani -- his expression one of crestfallen disappointment, betrayal, grief -- it was worse than any expression Raleska had ever seen sorrow her mother's face.

She was shaking. Haunted by this, by the build-up of it all, by the way her mother had turned and left her just like that -- as if giving up on all of them without not even a single word..

Raleska held true, until the sensation of Rosalyn's touch to her shoulder rocked her from her stupefied world. With a hoarse gasp of air precluding a strangled sob, Raleska suddenly bolted and stole away, unable to face any of them a moment longer. Tears streamed down her face, trailing behind her -- but the girl did not slow.