Heron Lake Plateau I fought death and lost.

Not really sure what to make of her encounter with Titmouse Screech, Towhee finished her circuit of the borders and finally admitted to herself that she needed some rest. She glanced at the sky automatically, chewing her lip when she saw no sign of X. What if he didn't return? Her heart lurched. She began to plod deeper into the territory, wincing as the open cuts on her face and shoulders twinged. She knew she should seek out her older sister's help, yet instead Towhee sought a secluded area and curled into a ball. She thought she would have a hard time sleeping, what with all the thoughts swarming her pounding head, yet she instantly passed out cold.

She slept like a rock so long that when she woke, it was dark and her muscles were horribly stiff. Groaning, the young Alpha rose to her feet and gave herself a shake. An unwitting cry tumbled from her lips as the scabs on her anterior throbbed horribly. Gritting her teeth, the she-wolf drew in a steadying breath and sent up a brief call for @Raven, then began trying to locate the medic's scent so she could meet her in the middle. As she walked across the breadth of the plateau, it occurred to her how strange it was to feel absolutely lost in her own home.

ASSEMBLIES @___@

After the big confrontation between the whole pack and Titmouse's band of friends, Raven's stress level was dialed up to eleven and the day that had elapsed since had done little to calm her nerves. She urgently wanted to seek out her younger brother for all sorts of reasons, but for now she felt that she was needed more at home. Or..."home", as it were. The journey from the caldera had been tiring enough without the additional strain of a turf war, and Raven was concerned about the well-being of her companions, particularly the younger ones. She had busied herself most of the day checking in on everyone and, when she had spare time, scouting the plateau for areas where she might collect fresh plants and herbs for a new medicine stash.

She slept in fits and starts beneath a copse of scraggly trees, but she happened to be awake when Towhee's call rose on the night air. Its message was intended specifically for her, and Raven knew that tone -- her sister was hurt and needed her help. The medic rose, shook out her coat, took a moment to orient on Towhee's direction, and immediately set off at a brisk lope.

She had no idea where she was going in this unfamiliar place, but fortunately she didn't have to travel long as Towhee met her somewhere in the middle. Raven could smell the faint scent of blood as she drew near to the young alpha, and after licking her chin in a gesture of comfort and greeting, she eyed Towhee's face with concern. The light of the crescent moon was dim when it peeked out behind the clouds that scooted across the sky, but the healer's eyes were sharp and she could make out the cuts on Towhee's face. "Did Titmouse do this to you?" she asked, signing along with her words so that Towhee could better understand her in the darkness.

When the caregiver approached and questioned her about the culprit, it was tempting to throw Titmouse under the bus. But that would go against her offer of acceptance, wouldn't it? Towhee took a moment to think as she nudged Raven's cheek in thanks for the prompt response, then took a seat to make it a little easier to sign.

-Yes, but,- she began, -we... resolved our differences, I think. I don't really know. He attacked me but quickly backed off. We talked,- she did her best to explain. -I gave him one last chance to join us. He said he'll always be a Redhawk but I don't know what he meant because he left right after that.- Towhee's face scrunched, hoping she'd summarized that correctly. She felt rested now but she was still incredibly emotionally and mentally drained.

-Anyway, would you mind helping me clean these? I don't think they need anything else.- And she knew her older sister didn't exactly have many supplies at her disposal, having been uprooted and transported far away from her beloved badger den. Aloud, she said, "I can't believe all of this. We came out here to find peace and then this—shit-show." That single word just about summed it up.

She stared off into the distance a minute or two, then faced Raven again. She wasn't a counselor but she was the closest thing to it. "Do you think we can trust him? Do you think I made the right call even giving him another chance...?"

"Shitshow" was right. What a total disaster the whole thing had been. The irony of it all was that they had come here to escape fighting and conflict. She listened as Towhee explained, and was relieved when she said that they had smoothed things over. She was glad that, in spite of everything, Towhee had continued to offer her brother a place in their pack. Truly, there was nothing Raven wanted more than to have all her ducklings siblings back together under her watchful eye again. Particularly Titmouse -- the poor boy had been through so much and she had never been able to protect him. At least, if he stuck with the pack this time around, she could do a better job of keeping him out of trouble (lol yeah right).

At her sister's request, she got to work cleaning the cuts and scratches on her face. She did her best to be gentle but thorough as she worked her smooth tongue into the lacerations in an effort to get all the dirt and hair out. Abruptly, Towhee looked up at her and asked Raven if she had made the right decision, and the healer answered her without hesitation. "Yes," the word came with a small smile. -"He's made a lot of bad decisions and has run with some questionable crowds, but his heart is pure. What he needs is love, patience, and stability. If you -- if we -- can give that to him, I think it will do him a lot of good. He can be trusted."- Raven liked to think that she knew the boy better than anyone, as they had always shared a very close bond and they had connected on a level that few others had been able to share with him. She wasn't sure how the winds of fate had managed to steer him so badly off course in his short life, but she felt that it wasn't too late to make things right again.

There were other opinions that might matter more than Raven's, such as their godparents', and if the majority of the pack didn't accept Screech, there was not much Towhee could do. But obtaining immediate reassurance from Raven made the young Alpha feel better. She gave a sigh, then stilled to allow the medic to finish the cleaning.

Once that was done, Towhee felt like there were a million things she needed to do, not to mention a million people to see. But instead of departing right away, she decided it couldn't hurt to spend a few more moments with Raven. Honestly, her presence was comforting, especially at a time like this.

"I still think it was the right choice to leave," she opined aloud out of nowhere, clearly needing to hash it out with someone, "leave the caldera, I mean. But I didn't expect any of this. And when I gave Screech options"—okay, more like death threats—"I didn't think it through. I never thought he'd actually stand his ground and try to fight us. And obviously I didn't plan any of what happened next. The whole thing was just..." Towhee paused, searching for the right word or phrase before settling on: "Fucking unfortunate."

The Alpha looked down at her paws a long moment, glad at least that her wounds felt a bit better, then confessed, "I told off X. He said he'd found paradise but it was more like a trap, wasn't it?" Her orange eyes lifted up to Raven's face. "I'm sure he didn't mean it and I guess it's my fault. I was the one who sent him out, who took his word and led all of us into danger." She exhaled shakily.

Raven continued to work on Towhee's wounds, lapping at the slashes on her shoulders until she was satisfied that they were clean. When she finished, Towhee continued to share her thoughts and Raven was content to listen. Clearly, the young alpha needed someone to talk to, and while Raven didn't have the age or experience of Elwood or Finley, she was a good listener. Sometimes, she even got lucky and gave reasonably good advice.

Towhee had so many doubts about her actions of late, and Raven didn't blame her. Everything had turned out to be such a colossal disaster, and she could only imagine how bad her sister must have felt about it all. It was not a good start for a newly-minted young alpha. She could have told Towhee the hard truth about the blind foolishness of some of her decisions, but she didn't want to kick the girl while she was already down. Instead, she tried to put a positive spin on it as she replied after a moment's thoughtful consideration. "Everyone makes mistakes sometimes, Tow. We can't always do everything right all the time. The best thing you can do, in my opinion, is own your mistakes and learn from them."

A dull pang in her abdomen reminded her that she was due any day to come into heat, and she sighed. Great, she thought. This again. She pushed that to the back of her mind, however, and stayed focused on Towhee. On the subject of X, the healer had mixed feelings. She had helped nurse the bird back to health when he'd turned up with a broken wing and she felt that his friendship had provided Towhee with something she really needed. Raven had developed an affinity of sorts for the raptor. But there was no denying that putting the fate of the pack into the bird's talons was a bad idea. "You should forgive X," she commented softly after a brief pause, her eyes on her sister's finely-angled face. "He did his best to do as you asked, and he did find us a beautiful place to live. But he is a bird, and there will always be things about us and our ways that he won't understand. He can be a great helper to our pack, but I wouldn't give him too much responsibility."

Towhee paid close attention as Raven offered her feedback, turning her sister's words over in her head. She stayed silent even after the caregiver had finished dispensing her advice, her thoughtful expression broadcasting the fact that she needed a moment to process.

Finally, she said, "You're right. But these particular mistakes could've gotten someone hurt or even killed, Rave. And what I've learned is..." Towhee's voice failed her just then and she simply made a frustrated noise and shook her head. "I've learned that I need to sit down and have a serious talk with Uncle Elwood and Aunt Finley," she eventually added, though it was very clear this wasn't what she'd been about to say originally.

As far as X went, Towhee felt a tug in her chest as she further contemplated the hawk. If she called for him, would he even come back? What would she do if he didn't? She had grown so accustomed to his presence—to all the ways he'd come to help her in everyday life—that the idea itself seemed to put a hole in her heart. If she hadn't told him to get lost, she wouldn't even be in her current shape. "I hope to never have to ask anything like that of him again," she murmured.

The Alpha fell silent again, thinking. If X didn't come back, it would probably solidify the outcome of her conversation with her godparents. The thought dragged a great sigh from deep in the center of her.

A comfortable silence fell between them as Raven let her sister think, and in those moments, the healer felt a flower of pride bloom in her heart for Towhee. She thought of how disadvantaged Towhee had been to be born deaf, a handicap that might have spelled death for a lesser wolf, and she reminisced on how much she'd had to overcome just to become an independent, functioning part of the pack. That Towhee had climbed all the way to alphaship and managed to hold her own there -- even with the help of a hawk -- was impressive beyond anything Raven could compare it to. She grinned looking at the girl, though Towhee was unaware of everything that was going through her elder sister's mind.

When she finally spoke, Towhee's words were still freighted with self-doubt and uncertainty. That was to be expected, and her words were true -- her mistakes had endangered their pack and could have definitely costed lives. But Raven truly hoped that she would forgive X and, more importantly, forgive herself. No alpha was perfect. She remembered when their own father had made mistakes in his time as alpha over their pack. She thought it was a good idea for Towhee to talk with Finley and Elwood, for the beta pair had led them for a long time and could likely impart a great deal of wisdom on their young successor. She nosed Towhee gently behind her ear and commented, "For what it's worth, I think you're a pretty good alpha." And it was the truth. Perfect? Not at all. But most definitely promising. "Talking with Aunt Flea and Uncle El is a good idea. You could learn a lot from them. Maybe you could even ask Elwood to lead the pack alongside you as your co-alpha. That would be a great way for you to learn some of the finer nuances of being a leader."

She hoped that Towhee wouldn't allow this to discourage her. Raven thought that having a steady hand on the wheel alongside hers might be the best solution -- if Elwood were willing, of course.

Her ear twitched when Raven's breath tickled it. Her older sister was saying something—she could feel the vibration against her earlobe—so she moved to look at her mouth. Towhee's ears slid backward, almost wondering if the caregiver could read her mind. She didn't dwell on it, instead flashing her older sister an appreciative smile... that quickly disappeared, to be replaced with a pensive look, at Raven's next few words.

"Maybe," she answered noncommittally, trying not to feel hurt by the juxtaposition of the two statements. Raven wasn't wrong to suggest what she did. It aligned with Towhee's own plans somewhat (although not exactly). If anything, it was probably too generous even calling Towhee a "pretty good" Alpha, at least right now. She liked to think she'd done an all right job up until now, though recent events had her doubting herself—deeply.

"I'll find them tomorrow," she said. "Thanks for listening to me, Rave, and helping me clean up," she added, then glanced at their dark surroundings. "Would you wanna go on a tour with me? I need to get back to the borders soon but I'd really like to check out what's actually inside this territory too."

It was a fine line Raven had to walk, confirming that Towhee's doubts were valid and well-founded (because she had screwed up bigtime) without crushing her confidence. Towhee had had a hell of a lot to deal with in the short time she'd been alpha. First the war with Blackfeather and the fallout from that, then the logistical nightmare of a long-distance move, and now this. It was sort of like the clusterfuck Obama had inherited from Bush, and everyone blamed Obama for all the problems. Raven thought her sister had done a good job dealing with everything, all things considered.

Towhee thanked her, and Raven smiled in return. To her invitation to accompany her, the healer nodded and replied, "I'd love to." She was never one to turn down an opportunity to spend time with Towhee...or any of the younger Redhawks, really. Rising from where she had been sitting, she fell into step alongside her sister and was glad for the company.

She shot Raven another tight-lipped smile and began walking without another word, orange eyes drinking in the lay of the land despite the darkness. It was rather flat, with the lake taking up most of the northern and western edges of the territory. Towhee hadn't really ventured there much yet, so she lifted her brows and bobbed her snout in that direction, then picked up the pace until she hit a steady trot.

"Are they making noises?" she wondered as they approached the dark, glassy lake and saw hundreds if not thousands of pale ghosts near the water's edge. Many of the birds appeared to be asleep, at least until the wolves encroached. The nearest ones stirred, some hastily winging off into the darkness.

Towhee looked to Raven for an answer, then watched the waterfowl a few moments before turning back to her sister and saying, "I've been marking the borders around the base of the plateau. When I was down there, I think I saw a waterfall. I didn't get too close but I'd think it's just beneath the lake. There's some sort of floodplain there, I think."

They walked in silence for a time, both of them absorbed in the scenery around them as they moved toward the lake. Its surface lay glassy and calm beneath the night sky, subtle hints of diffuse moonlight painting a ghostly sheen across its mirror-like expanse. It was really the only thing Raven liked about this new territory thus far. The plateau itself was too featureless and exposed for her liking; she would most likely spend the majority of her time hanging around in the wooded areas that lay at the base of the plateau. Still, there were a lot of positive qualities about the place and if one took the turf war out of the equation, it had been a solid choice on the part of Towhee and X.

Towhee asked if the sleepy birds at the lake were making any noise, and Raven shook her head. All was silent, save for the occasional cry of a night bird somewhere and the soft sigh of the breeze as it brushed gentle ripples across the serene lake. Towhee then went on to explain her observations from recent marking trips down to the lowlands, and Raven answered, "I like it down there. I'm probably going to spend a lot of time foraging for plants in the thicket and the marshy areas. This type of environment is perfect for what I do." Raven grinned, appreciating this chance to spend time with Towhee. With the craziness of the past few weeks (months? decades? she'd lost track of time with everything that had gone on), she hadn't had much time to spend with the busy young alpha. This was nice. "I wonder if there's any fish in this lake," she commented, looking out over the water with appraising eyes.

Methinks we should wrap this and have an updated one! :)

Raven's comment made the gears in Towhee's head creak. She felt bad for uprooting the pack in general—they'd had to leave so much behind—but she felt especially guilty about the loss of Raven's badger den. Not only would this move force Raven to build a new stash from scratch, it put the pack at a disadvantage in the case of any medical maladies.

"I'd like to help," the Alpha said. "If you need help finding a good place to store things, or could just use a fellow picker. I'll make myself available." Towhee offered Raven a smile, then added, "I'm sure there are, otherwise why would all these birds hang out here?" in regards to the fish.

Sounds good to me! Last one from me here. :)

Had Raven known how guilty Towhee felt about the stash she'd had to leave behind, the healer would have told her not to worry about it. Much of what she'd had was withered and crumbling to dust anyway, and truthfully she looked forward to the busy-work of foraging a new stockpile in the spring. What she would miss the most, however, was her little badger den. She'd never slept in the den -- not since she was a baby, anyway -- but it had made a perfect place to house all her various plants, flowers, and other weird objects she happened to collect (she'd had a number of interesting feathers, some oddly-twisted sticks, brightly-colored rocks, and a few random bones, to name a few).

She nodded in agreement to Towhee's observation re: birds being a sign of fish in the lake, and commented in reply to her previous statement, "If you happen to see a small place where I could keep my new stash, that would be really awesome." She grinned at her sister and continued, "When the snowmelt slows and things have dried out a bit more, maybe we can go picking together and I'll show you what to look for so you can grab stuff for me while you're out and about."

They continued to walk side-by-side, occasionally stopping to observe something interesting or to discuss some topic or another. Raven considered it one of her favorite evenings in recent weeks, and for days afterward, her heart would be full from this quality time spent with her sister.