Redhawk Caldera Who knows how to use a flamethrower?

Towhee itched, literally and metaphorically. Her wounds were healing, the scabbing flesh flaking because of the dry winter air. @Raven put a salve on them at night. It helped, although it didn't entirely alleviate the problem. And the inner itching was even worse. She was down for the count, unable to patrol or do anything useful at all. She was bored and restless to the point of aggravation.

Because of her current futility, she typically sent X to scour the borders at least twice a day. To his credit, the hawk did as he was told. So far, he hadn't come back with any news, though as the mercenary bent down to nip at a festering crust on one of her forelegs, she noticed the raptor's approach. She straightened, shifting uncomfortably as he swooped to land in front of her.

"Someone's at the borders?" she guessed as soon as he'd folded his wings. X bobbed his head, "Yes." Towhee's ears folded backward as she considered a moment, then muttered, "Fuck it," and rose onto all fours. Her various injures certainly ached, pinched and stung, yet the yearling nonetheless began making her way downhill, following X's shadow as he guided her.

But by the time they arrived, the borders were empty. X wound downward again and perched in a nearby tree. Towhee looked at him and he appeared to shrug apologetically. The guardian sighed, then squinted around a moment. She then dropped her muzzle toward the snow and sniffed at the trail of paw prints leading away from the caldera, filing away the (honestly useless) information even as she contemplated what to do now.

It was strange to be home. Even stranger was feeling like it was strange to be home. It was an uncomfortable thing, but try as she might, Finley simply couldn't shake it. She had expected to return from Blackfeather feeling victorious and safe. But instead, she felt only guilt, remorse, and fear for all the things she had ignored in her fervor to destroy those who had threatened her family. There had been no time to consider all else that had gone wrong at home since declaring war on Blackfeather with the fight looming ahead. Now that it was over, angst over those things had joined the rotation of thoughts that were constantly battling for attention in her mind, which had become a chaotic wreck since coming home.

Fin too heard the call at the borders and, like a dumb ass, decided to answer. She was slower to arrive than Towhee due to the limp in her step and the complete lack of enthusiasm in her attitude. But the alpha couldn't help but feel like that was for the better as she came down a ridge and spotted Towhee alone but for her bird in the distance. Her heart tightened with a mix of joy and remorse - the former because of how wonderful it was to know that her goddaughter was safe again, and the latter because she had now allowed herself to be very aware of the fact that her vendetta against Blackfeather had directly caused Towhee to lose her closest friend in the whole world.

The Blackthorn picked her way slowly down from her perch to begin heading towards Towhee. Though she knew her goddaughter wouldn't hear her, she sent out a short call in the hopes that her hawk would be a good little bird and get Towhee's attention for her so she wouldn't have to over-extend herself in trying to catch up.

She started when X abruptly landed in the snow a yard away, kicking up a sparkling shower of white granules. Towhee scarcely looked at him, immediately pivoting instead to look behind her. The tension that quickly built in her muscles relaxed just as rapidly when her orange eyes clapped upon her godmother's familiar face. She managed a weary smile as she trudged toward Finley, taking a moment to glance back at the hawk and nod. Taking his cue, X winged back to a higher perch.

"What's up?" she said, ignoring the momentary urge to speak in ptero. The less she moved her body parts right now, the better. On that note, she did something she rarely did at the borders: Towhee plopped onto her butt. "Our caller was impatient, evidently," she said, motioning toward the trail of paw prints before shaking her head with a dismissive snort.

The hawk seemed to get the picture. She saw it plop onto the ground in front of Towhee, effectively turning the girl's attention backwards at her. Fin marvelled over this as she continued to trek towards her, wondering if she had taught it to do this and what else it might know. It rose to the top of her mind as something to ask about once they reached each other, which happened only a few minutes later.

"Works for me," Fin replied, glancing at the tracks leading away from the Caldera. Saved her the trouble of having to waste her breath on wolves she didn't want around anyway. She stepped forward and leaned down to sniff at the prints anyway, just for good measure. It wasn't anyone she recognized, so she too let it go.

"Did you train it to do that?" Fin asked as she hobbled in a semi-circle to face Towhee again, "Drop in front of you so you turn around?"

Towhee didn't understand the question at first, answering with nothing but a slow blink. Then she realized Finley was referring to X. She glanced at the bird, who was now preening himself, his head twisted around nearly 180° as his talons firmly gripped the bark of the tree limb. The Gamma licked her lips thoughtfully, eyes ever so slightly squinted when they turned back to her godmother.

"X is a he," she said flatly (as she said most everything), "and no, I didn't teach him to do that. We've sort of developed our own mode of communication, though." Towhee shrugged, a motion which turned into an agitated fidget as she scuffed at the snow. She knew her relationship with the hawk had come under scrutiny from others in the pack and it caused her to feel defensive, especially because, "X has sort of become my best friend, now that—yeah." She didn't think she even needed to say that traitor's name.

"I don't want to dwell on the past, though," she continued after a loud exhale, staving off any inevitable discussion about Phox. "Now that we've won, we can start thinking about the future again now, can't we?" she mused speculatively.

There wasn't often a noticeable difference in the tone her goddaughter used, but Fin heard her frustration, subtle as it may be. She had tried to think of the hawk more like Towhee did - as a friend, not a pet or some random weird ass bird that decided it liked being a servant to a wolf. It hadn't worked at all so far, but at the Redhawk's words, Fin felt her perception shift. Her best friend. Guilt swelled in her chest and once again, she felt that awful nausea rise in her stomach. She had driven Phox away. It was her fault. She had fucked up her family by trying to make it better. Again. Would she ever learn her lesson?

Towhee pushed past the topic though, and Fin was grateful though still full of guilt. The alpha nodded as she took in a breath and sighed. "It's all we can do," she answered, her mind slipping towards Elwood and the conversations they'd had since returning from Blackfeather and having a feeling she knew where this would be going.

Fortunately, Finley made no attempt to pursue the topic of Towhee's wayward brother. Following her aunt's brief response, the Gamma scanned the borders for a moment. She felt so old all of a sudden. Her body ached and creaked (presumably), and that was nothing compared to how much she'd gone through mentally and emotionally lately. Losing Phox had been a brutal twist of fate on top of the war. They'd won, yet she'd still come home to a giant, ragged hole in her life. It all left a rather bitter taste in her mouth.

"I need something good to happen," she said abruptly, eyes cutting back to her Alpha female. Their orange depths were simultaneously hard and molten. Towhee lapsed into silence for a long beat, though this wasn't an open-ended statement or even an entreaty. "I want to be the Beta. I've proved my loyalty, risked my life, fought and won for this pack. I'm ready, Aunt Finley." Moreover, "I'm worthy."

The question came, just as Fin had expected. The pang of remorse she felt in that moment, however, was unexpected. She'd thought there'd be some relief for her in putting some finality on this ever-lingering issue of Towhee's desire to rise into the leadership ranks. Maybe it was to come in the next few weeks, or maybe days. Hell, maybe in a few minutes when all was said and done and the girl had her answer, finally. The alpha gave a smile to her goddaughter, taking one last moment to view her as the sweet, happy little pup she had known for so long before taking the dive.

"No, Towhee," she answered, "You can't be our beta."

She and Elwood had spoken at length about it, numerous times in fact. And not just recently - before the war had even begun, or it had even been talked about. The conflict with Blackfeather had certainly changed the conversation in many ways. It had certainly sped the timeline up, but the final conclusion had always been the same. Towhee had grown and matured in many ways. She wasn't a child anymore, and to lead was in her blood. Finley had always tried to nurture that in her, by encouraging her in some ways and deterring her in others. She couldn't help but think in looking at her now that she'd done her job pretty damn well. But still, there simply was no way that Fin could allow her to serve as their beta.

"...because I need you to be our alpha," she finished.

She knew Finley wouldn't argue with her; there was simply no room for it. So when the Alpha female retorted with a "no," Towhee steeled her jaw and blinked in surprise. Her lips parted. She had already made a solid case, though she would fight for this right if needs be. They pressed together again because it appeared Finley had more to say on the subject. But when she did, Towhee couldn't believe her ears (or, rather, her eyes).

Her heartbeat was pounding in her ears all of a sudden as she regarded Finley, trying to make sense of the words. Despite her hearing impairment, she knew she had heard (seen) right. But what did her godmother mean by it? Was it a joke? Towhee was not amused. She squinted at her aunt's face, seeing no trace of glibness in the Blackthorn's expression. In fact, all she could think as she gazed at Finley was, When did you get so pale? The matriarch wasn't old, but she looked like Towhee felt: aged.

For several moments, she didn't really know what to say. She had a lot of questions. Eventually, she simply settled on, "We already have a perfectly good Alpha. Two of them, actually."

Towhee looked flabbergasted, and Fin couldn't help but smile in spite of the gravity of this moment. She hadn't meant to put her on edge for those few seconds, but in retrospect, maybe she had. She was still her, somewhere underneath all of this serious, brooding, guilty pile of wolf she had become during her tenure as alpha. Somewhere, she was still the teasing, fun-loving, silly Finley of old.

Truth was, she was tired of it all. While she 100% believed in her heart that giving the Caldera to Towhee was the right thing to do, not just for the pack but for her niece, she had her own selfish reasons for wanting to step down as well. She'd never really been cut out for the job, in her own opinion. She felt like she had given up a part of herself in stepping into the rank. She was more comfortable in the supporting role, and she was frankly just better at it. Just as Towhee would be better at leading. Fin and Elwood had taught her to listen and mind the opinions of others - to be trusting and obedient when the situation called for it. But Towhee ultimately was born to call the shots and have hers be the opinions that counted.

And besides that, Peregrine and Fox would have wanted this. Though Finley may have played the part of alpha since their deaths, she had never stopped being their beta. She never would.

"The pack needs an excellent alpha, not just a perfectly good one. And while I'd definitely say Elwood is an excellent alpha, I'm certainly not. I've gotten by, but I'm getting old, kid. I don't think I've made the best decisions lately and I don't have the energy I used to. Honestly, I'd rather spend what energy I do have on my kids," Fin paused, giving her a meaningful look so that she would know that she was one of those kids before continuing, "Besides that, this is Redhawk Caldera. A Redhawk was always supposed to be running the place, and it's time one did again. And you're dead ass right - you're worthy."

Her sharp eyes fixed resolutely on Finley's face, almost as if daring her to refute. Towhee realized in that moment that she was challenging her Alpha about replacing her as Alpha, and the irony wasn't lost on her. Still she stared, taking in every single one of Finley's words and listening very raptly for someone who couldn't hear even the loudest thunderclap.

The silence that met her godmother's words was deafening. Towhee felt and thought so many things in that moment that it was difficult down to pin down anything to form a response. She took her time. In fact, among her whirlwind musings, she couldn't help but feel her chest hitch when she realized that she wanted desperately to tell Phox about this and ask his opinion on the matter.

At length, Towhee spoke, switching to ptero without thinking. -You asked me once if I trusted you. I told you I did. Nothing about that has changed. I trust your judgment in this.- Suddenly, she took to her feet, closing the distance between them. -If this is really what you think is best, I'm honored to accept. And even if you're not my Alpha anymore, I will always trust you with my life.- She abruptly tugged Finley toward her in a fierce hug. "And I am—and have always been—a Redhawk-Blackthorn," she muttered in her aunt's ear, voice for once not flat as it broke slightly, "just like you've really been my mother all along."

Fin's eyes shone with pride and emotion as Towhee spoke. Her heart swelled even as it broke. Part of her felt as though she really was doing her goddaughter a disservice with this promotion (she was still so young, after all). But that was just another reason that Finley didn't fit the rank. She saw it as a burden whereas Towhee would take it as an honor - a sentiment that was voiced shortly after the thought flit through her mind. It was enough to silence what few, inconsequential doubts Fin still had over this. She'd made the right decision. And it was probably the best one she'd ever made in her tenure as alpha of the Caldera.

She allowed herself to be pulled into the hug, leaning into it just as fiercely. Fin had to shut her eyes tight to keep the tears from falling at Towhee's last words. The sentiment meant more to her than her goddaughter would likely ever realize. There were so many ways Fin had failed in her life, even though she had always tried to do things right. The failures that haunted her the most were the ways in which she had failed as a mother. Eljay, Lucy, Liffey, Phox, Titmouse, Gannet, Nightjar... The list was heartbreakingly long and though she had done well in some ways, Fin was hardwired to dwell on the others most of the time. But Towhee reminded her she wasn't a complete fuck up. And where she hadn't failed, she had done extremely well - Towhee was proof of that.

Fin held her tight for a few moments more before stepping back so they both could breathe. She fixed Towhee with a watery smile, nodding to show her gratitude, hoping the gesture would somehow say all the things she couldn't put to words just then. She swallowed the lump in her throat and took a breath before breaking the silence, in typical Finley fashion. "Alright, let's pull ourselves together," she said, "Can't let anyone see us like this. Leaders are supposed to be bad asses. That's your first lesson in alphadom." She smiled, realizing belatedly that using words like alphadom with Towhee didn't usually work out that well.

They embraced for a long beat before gently pulling apart. Towhee returned Finley's crooked smile with a small grin of affection and gratitude. She snorted at her aunt's words, taking the unfamiliar term as some sort of coded portmanteau of "alpha" and "dominance."

"I think I've already aced that lesson," she pointed out, expression turning into a slight smirk. Her face then grew more sober again. "Will—you'll still be a leader too, right? You and Uncle Elwood?" They hadn't explicitly discussed his role in any of this, though she knew full well that Finley wouldn't make such an important decision without her mate's blessing. "You'll be the Betas now?" Towhee guessed.

It was right then that the whole thing hit her. She felt suddenly breathless. She had been preparing to take on the Beta rank for a long time. But she had never seen this coming. She had leapfrogged right onto the golden red throne. Towhee could feel the yoke of responsibility settling upon her white-streaked shoulders. It didn't weigh on her, so to speak, but she was suddenly very, very aware of it.

"You'll be the Betas now," she repeated. It wasn't a question this time. "That's my first decree as Alpha," Towhee added, the light smirk returning even as a burgeoning excitement and sense of pride thrilled through her.

Fin smirked at her goddaughter's response, nodding with a slight shrug. Towhee was nothing if not bad ass. The simple fact that she had survived this long with her disability was proof enough of that. And then there was her unamused face - that thing could stop anyone dead in their tracks.

She quirked a brow as the girl continued, asking about her and Elwood's positions now that they had relinquished their rule of the pack to her. They had determined already that they would step down together, and also that it would likely be back to their old positions as betas, if Towhee would have them. The fact that it came from the now-alpha as a question made her grin - an expression that brightened as she thought it through and then made it into the command it always could have been.

"Good, you're catching on already," Fin said with a chuckle, "And yes, we'll be your betas. We've had a lot of pratice at that." She was not foolish enough to think that Towhee wouldn't need any help in her new role. She would need plenty, and her godparents would always be there to offer it whether she made them her betas or her omegas. Though the latter would be quite the unexpected dick move.

Finley agreed and Towhee felt her stomach do a little flip of excitement. She had been gunning for leadership for a long time now, yet she had never anticipated this plot twist. It would be days before she fully grasped what her new role really meant.

In the meantime, she decided she would simply focus on the fact that her godmother had really risen to the occasion for her. "Thank you," she repeated, although she wasn't grateful simply for the promotion itself or the trust it implied but, "for giving me something to feel good about." It was something to look forward to—growing into her new position—and most certainly a promising avenue toward a brighter future.

"Should we go tell everyone?" Towhee wondered, then mulled for a second before amending, "Let's go tell everyone." That could be her second decree. With a grin and an affectionate nip to her godmother's cheek, the newly-crowned queen of the caldera trotted inward from the borders, eager to see the Redhawks' reactions to the change in leadership.

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