Redhawk Caldera all mine

The day was clouded over, a chill in the air. Cinar had never been one to complain about anything but a downpour when it came to the weather, but he had never imagined that the cold would irritate his shoulder so much!

Grimacing, he ceased a border patrol momentarily to sit with it. Maybe it was time to revisit Alivia's 'physical therapy' now that the warm weather was fading out.

It was troubling to think that this pain might torture him for the rest of his life. He was young, he was meant to heal quickly; had it just been left untreated for too long? A frown crossing his muzzle, he ran his tongue over his right shoulder with the hope of soothing it.

He wasn't going to let this hold him back.

She felt a little under the weather this morning, though Towhee refused to look too far into it. She headed out on patrol, similarly disregarding the slight twinge in her leg as she loped up and over the caldera’s rim. It was nearing the end of summer and as she paused at the crest to survey the wilderness, it afforded her a pretty good preview of the coming autumn.

As she made her way down the slope to the borders, she caught sight of Cinar at the caldera’s foot. She definitely owed him a conversation, so Towhee veered toward him. She watched as she fussed at his right shoulder, though she assumed he was just itchy or something.

The ground even out underfoot and Towhee closed the distance, only to halt and announce, Damn, I feel like I got hit by a bus moose all of a sudden.

He couldn't say he was pleased to see Towhee. A mixture of things had sent his opinion of her on a downward spiral.

But, that didn't mean he wouldn't be polite. Nothing changed the fact that she was higher ranking, nor that she was his elder. He would show his respect. You're not the only one. He chuckled in response, smiling for a moment before coming back to a stand. It was impossible to avoid grimacing when the pain still shot down his leg.

I was just finishing a patrol of the borders. Would you like to join me? He still had about halfway to go, and he was determined to make it the full distance.

When would her body stop trying to disrupt her rendezvous with Cinar? Towhee shook her head lightly and resisted the urge to take a seat as weariness pressed down on her like a heavy blanket.

You too? she asked, tipping her head a little. Your shoulder? she guessed as he stood with a grimace. Brow furrowing, the Elder wondered, Did something happen to it?

Unlike her, he was a bit young for arthritis or whatever it was that ailed Towhee’s aging bones. She blinked at his invitation, which she would answer once she heard more details about Cinar’s ailment.

Cinar nodded, confirming her guess. Yes, I injured it before joining you all here. He wasn't so sure how much should be shared. He didn't want to give the impression that he was weak. It will heal, it's just bothering me today more than usual. He decided not to mention that it was part of why he had been set against joining the hunt. He had grown to be a bit fearful of deer, particularly the antler-y branch.

Pausing, he waited to see if Towhee would follow. Do you need to rest? He asked, some form of concern coating his brow.

Perhaps he was unfamiliar with the troubles of aging wolves. Could you blame him, though? He had never been around one who had lived as long as Towhee.

You’ve been here a while, Towhee pointed out when Cinar said it would heal. It should’ve healed already. You know, Livi knows a bit about this stuff. Her mom—my best friend, back in the day—suffered from chronic, debilitating back pain. They actually left the Teekons years ago to find help for her. I think Livi learned a lot from that experience.

Besides, weren’t those two kind of eyeing each other? Towhee couldn’t remember whether she’d made that up in her head or whether they really might fancy each other. Either way, surely Cinar wouldn’t mind a massage from Alivia.

Anyway, I feel your pain. I have a bum leg. It hasn’t bothered me in a while, which I thought was mostly because I don’t travel as much anymore. But now that the weather’s cooling off and it’s starting to act up again, I think the temperature might play a bigger factor than I thought, Towhee thought aloud, frowning. I can join you for a bit.

It wasn’t her leg that was bothering her today. In fact, it wasn’t any particular part of Towhee’s body that felt afflicted. She just felt like she wanted to curl up in a ball and nap for days, despite getting a good night’s sleep. She’d also eaten a good breakfast, though this exhaustion didn’t feel like the sort that came from lack of food and rest. It felt as if something had sucked all her energy right out of her…

Towhee said what he had already been thinking, which shouldn't have been a problem if it didn't make it feel like it was suddenly true. He was too young to already be dealing with this crap!

She offered me 'physical therapy' some time ago. I do think it's time to take her up on the offer. He responded, pushing out a sigh. He needed to go visit Alivia soon, anyways. He hadn't since returning to the caldera. Had he been avoiding her without realizing it? Or had she been avoiding him?

Towhee's mention of the weather's effects did make sense. Why else would they both be flaring up today?

I miss the hot spring that used to be near my home. I soaked in it whenever I was sore - worked wonders.

She breathed in sharply as that thought repeated. Of course, maybe it was just a tick and she was suffering from Lyme disease. But there was something else that might be feeding directly on Towhee’s energy. Her jaw clenched as her heart skipped a beat. She hadn’t let herself dwell on this much and she still wasn’t sure how she felt about the possibility…

Cinar’s mention of a hot spring recaptured her attention. Towhee actually moaned at the thought. It also drummed up a fond memory with @Ceridwen. She wondered if the young woman was somewhere around here or if her adventures had taken her elsewhere. Hopefully she would come back someday so they could reconvene their coven of two.

That sounds amazing, though I’m sure you’ll be in good paws with Livi, Towhee said with a careworn smile. Taking a dip in the lake can help too, in my experience, though it’s definitely not the same thing as a hot spring.

She should say something else, carry the conversation, but Towhee’s thoughts quickly returned inward. She realized it was excitement pushing against the feeling of utter depletion. She might be old, this might not be the right time of year, and yet… Towhee realized she wholeheartedly welcomed the idea of Motherhood: Round… 7?

They settled into silence, and Cinar couldn't help feeling tense - awkward. Should they be talking about what had happened in the weeks prior? He certainly didn't want to.

He still hadn't completely decided how to approach it. Ignoring it entirely, pretending nothing had happened, would be easier.. but would that be cruel?

No! What did that matter? Towhee had been the one to twice now fall into her heat around him. It was just plain cruel on her end! What else was he supposed to think?

Realizing his brow had furrowed, he quickly smoothed his face over.

After the excitement washed through her, worry followed in its wake. Towhee threw up a mental hand paw, refusing to indulge it. She didn’t want to waste energy fretting about things, especially since it seemed like such a limited resource now. Her heart did a little leap at that thought, then Towhee drew in another sharp breath and glanced at Cinar.

He wore a blank expression, which hopefully meant he was thinking about his own stuff and not judging her inability to hold a conversation. Towhee pushed out a slower breath and glanced forward, ascertaining the route ahead of them as they rounded the great curve of their territory.

So, what else is going on in your world? Besides the shoulder.

Just because she had her suspicions didn’t necessarily mean anything, she tried to keep in mind. Towhee gently pushed the possibilities from her mind for now, concentrating properly on both Cinar and their surroundings.

Towhee suddenly speaking up again forced him to refocus.

If I'm being honest, not much. His life had been quiet as of late, besides that one thing. I think I've been keeping to myself too much. He chuckled, his words light enough that it must not be having too hard of an impact on him.

If he was feeling lonely, it was his own fault. He had been wrapped up in worries and frustrations for some time now, and while they were beginning to clear it was growing more obvious that he had hidden himself away somewhat. Cinar had no trouble when it came to others leaning on him, but he had never liked it when things were the other way around. What he did, felt, and thought outside of the caldera was private.

But, I am happy here. It's far different from my natal pack, so I suppose I'm adjusting to my new expectations. Which was that there were far less of them - he struggled to keep busy at times.

She didn’t say anything right away, pondering Cinar’s words. The others in the pack seemed to thrive when Towhee gave them tasks, not just to keep them busy but to help them build their lives here in the caldera. (She would never admit that she’d learned this custom from Germanicus.) She would be happy to provision Cinar if it might help him figure out his place here.

You didn’t join the recent hunt, she observed without judgment. If group activites aren’t your thing, maybe you could spend more time with pack mates one-on-one? I can’t remember how you feel about kids, though Carolina and Lyric are growing up fast. They could use some mentors. I know for a fact Lyric would love to join you on some patrols if you’re willing.

I'm sorry about the hunt, I was afraid I would get in the way. I helped Hotah distribute the carcass afterwards He admitted. But you're right, I have done well speaking to packmates individually.

Cinar wasn't so sure about working with the nestlings on his own. He wanted to be good with kids, but the truth was that he had little experience past the act that got them there in the first place. He's an eager one, ah? He responded with a light snicker, recalling the young boy running about outside of the den shouting after his sister - it seemed that he had been playing some sort of pretend game.


I want to work where I can, truly. He promised, managing to smile at the older woman. Call me overly-ambitious, but I'd like to see myself moving up in your ranks some day. The caldera is my home now, and I'm going to contribute to the best of my ability. What that meant depended on the day. Some days it would be hunting small prey, patrolling borders, listening to packmates problems.. other times it would be doing anything he could to keep his place, including spilling blood.

Cinar’s admission reminded her of her recent chat with Hotah. There was nothing wrong with the men’s aspirations, though she suddenly wondered if Killdeer might feel concerned about their ambitions. Towhee didn’t think either man planned to usurp her grandson his birthright—especially not with the other Redhawks prepared to defend it, herself included—but she had begun wondering why he hadn’t stepped back up to the plate lately.

Keep doing what you’re doing, then do some more, Towhee quipped with a little smile and flick of her tail. I mean, you’ve already made your way to Journeyman. There’s still room to grow. But if hunting isn’t your strong suit, then what is? Do you consider yourself good at anything in particular? Or, well, do you feel passionate about something?

That was an easy answer. I'm good with my words. That's how I was taught to be. He responded, looking up to the sky. He was sure that the clouds looked like they would part any minute now. I observe and speak before I ever use my teeth. To him, that was the real advantage over pure strength.

..Alivia may have let it slip to me that there used to be an advisor. I suppose that did motivate me some for a time. He chuckled, tail waving slowly at his hocks. But I think I could be happy so long as I keep busy. That's the important part.

Cinar wasn't sure he could bring himself to be any sort of true leader again, so Towhee had no real reason to worry. He had failed so miserably the last time that he couldn't imagine throwing away what he had now to try taking over the caldera - besides, he liked the leadership.

Ah, a diplomat, Towhee said, swallowing a yawn. There’s still room for an advisor, she assured him, shaking her head as if she could shake off the weariness pressing on her. I would approach Mal and ask her what she could use from you in that regard. But first, you should wrap this patrol and then go find Livi and start some physical therapy. I think I’ve done all I can for now.

She swung her head to offer him a friendly nudge on the shoulder, then peeled away and stared uphill. Did she really feel like making that effort right now? Towhee’s orange eyes scanned along the borderline, seeking out any kind of suitable shelter, and decided she would head to that one apple tree. It was a good place to catch an afternoon nap… if her subdued excitement didn’t keep her from actually sleeping.