Redhawk Caldera A brand new black hole in the solar system

Time for the parents to freak out? This is backdated a few days!

It wasn't strange for a few days to pass since Elwood had last laid eyes on Eljay. Although the whole family used the rendezvous site as a home base, they all came and went as they pleased. And despite the fact that Eljay had always been particularly close with his parents, he had, in some ways, become a more independent young wolf.

Perhaps Elwood should have noticed sooner, though -- especially after the commotion over Finley's heat. Eljay had been withdrawn since then, but rather than try and coax him back out of his shell, Elwood had simply let his son deal with his emotions himself. He assumed -- maybe incorrectly -- that Eljay would be fine in time, and would step up to be the biggest brother of the impending litter of puppies.

But when he was unable to find Eljay, Elwood became concerned. He wanted to talk to the boy about Finley's pregnancy and Eljay's role both as a caregiver and family member, and usually he was fairly easy to track down. Elwood couldn't seem to find a fresh scent trail, however, and he started to get worried. "Eljay?" he called, pausing. He was near the borders, having followed the most recent evidence of Eljay's presence. And while it wasn't completely fresh, it almost smelled like he had crossed into unclaimed territory. He frowned.

"Eljay?" he shouted again, and when there was no response, another name fell unbidden from his lips. "@Finley!"

The shout of Finley's name went unheard by Towhee, yet it startled @Phox from a sound sleep, causing him to jostle his napping sister awake too. Towhee yawned and blinked, looking inquisitively at her sibling and then following his gaze as he peered downhill, in the direction of the borders. She saw nothing and obviously couldn't hear, so her gaze returned to Phox.

-What is it?- she demanded, watching him as he explained that Elwood was calling for his mate from near the borders. Although it was likely none of her business, Towhee climbed to her feet and began trotting down the slope toward Lake Rodney's shore, eager to help if there was some guarding to be done.

"Uncle Elwood!" she cried out as soon as she saw him. -What's going on?- She scanned their surroundings but saw nothing out of the ordinary. Her orange eyes eventually tracked back to his face, wide and wondering.

It wasn't Finley's voice that he heard calling out to him, but he turned anyway. He found Towhee approaching him, looking concerned even as she came to a halt and signed a question. He glanced over her shoulder, hoping to see his mate in the distance, but shifted his gaze back to his goddaughter's face when there was no sign of Finley.

"It's Eljay," he said, accompanying his speech with his eldest son's name sign. That was the extent of his attempts to speak in her preferred method of communication; he was too flustered to remember the few signs that he knew. "I haven't been able to find him -- but it smells like he left the territory. That's not like him," he added worriedly.

Ah! Towhee thought when Elwood mentioned his eldest son. She immediately thought back to a few days previous, when she had seen him take off from the borders, Gannet hot on his heels. They had gone toward Lake Rodney. She glanced toward the lake now but saw no sign of either one of them. Of course, that had been days ago.

Returning her gaze to her uncle, Towhee said, "I saw him and Gannet running toward the lake." She paused, trying to remember how many suns had set and risen since then. "Maybe a week ago," she guessed. "Maybe a few days less," she corrected after another moment's thought. "You should call for Gannet. They were standing there talking when I last saw them."

Towhee was just the right wolf to run into at that time. Her face lit up with recognition and she quickly informed Elwood that she had seen Eljay and Gannet here, a few days or a week ago, and that the two boys had been heading towards Lake Rodney. This brought some relief to the Alpha male; maybe Gannet and Eljay had just gone on an excursion together. But his worry quickly resurfaced, because that didn't explain why there were no fresh indications of Eljay's presence around the territory.

"Thank you, Towhee," Elwood said emphatically. He reached out to touch her shoulder with his snout. "Will you help me call for @Gannet?" he asked, then tipped his head back and loosed a howl asking the Delta to join them.

Her desire to help her uncle mixed with a feeling of awkwardness when he requested her assistance calling for Gannet. "Um," she said, her body language telegraphing her uncertainty. "Sure," she added after a beat, biting at her lip. Phox had shown her how to howl, with Raven's assistance. But judging by the faces they sometimes made when she tried, the noise that came out of her mouth wasn't exactly pretty.

As a matter of fact, when the Xi filled up her lungs, then threw back her head and pushed the breath up her throat along her vocal chords, a truly horrific noise burst from the tip of her snout. It sounded like the braying of a donkey mixed with the caterwauling of a feline in heat. It was excessively loud to the point of being earsplitting... but at least it got the job done... maybe?

Gannet wasn't exactly nearby when he heard his uncle summon him, but he was close enough.  He looked after the trail he was following, looking forward to a little trashpanda snack, but instead turned with a shrug.  He could find it again later.  

He stopped short, however, when a horrendous sound followed the first, and his ears ticked sideways with confusion and displeasure.  What the fuck was that?

Thoroughly nonplussed, he began to run, unsure what the ruckus was but assuming it couldn't be anything good.  Keyed up for whatever might be waiting, he was a bit taken aback when all he found was Towhee and Elwood waiting.

"What was that?" He asked, looking at the two of them with alarm.

Elwood didn't notice Towhee's hesitation; his own howl was already filling the void around them. It was only as his call tapered off that Towhee decided to accompany him, and when she did, he started visibly. There was a brief hitch in his request for Gannet, but he smoothly brought it to a close despite his wide eyes now fixed on Towhee. This was something he hadn't considered: since she was deaf, she couldn't physically hear the sound of other wolves howling. So she was doing her best to imitate him, although the sound made goosebumps appear beneath Elwood's fur.

Before he could say anything to her about it, Gannet arrived, looking breathless and alarmed. Elwood bit back a smile and cleared his throat. "Towhee and I were calling for you," he said, with a pointed look in his direction; he hoped that Towhee's feelings wouldn't be hurt. He glanced at her and signed "thank you," then turned back to Gannet with a sobered expression.

"Towhee said that she saw you and Eljay heading towards Lake Rodney a few days ago. Is Eljay okay? Did he come back to the caldera?" he asked, his hope and fear simultaneously evident in his voice.

Fin felt numb as she answered Elwood's call. She always knew where Eljay was. Always. Most times, she could pinpoint his exact location, though at the very least she knew generally where to find him. That sense of awareness was gone, though. For once, she had awoken to no trail. No sign of him having been anywhere near her for hours. In her heart she had known almost instantly, and know she moved as though there were heavy lead in her paws. She didn't even have enough energy in her to react to the wild, shrieking sound of Towhee's "howl". She merely flinched and continued on her way until she was amongst the company of her pack, staring blankly at the three of them.

Her gaze shifted over Towhee and Gannet to land on Elwood. She took a soft breath as she gazed at him, wondering if he knew. Eljay was gone, and it was all her fault. She couldn't envision a scenario in which her eldest son would leave the packlands for just a quick jaunt in the surrounding territories. If he was gone from the Caldera, it was for only one reason - because he was gone.

"How'd I do?" Towhee's expression asked, though before Elwood could give her some constructive criticism on her terrible howling abilities, a wild-eyed Gannet appeared. He seemed a little distraught, which was a strange look for him; he was usually so expressionless in her experience. Towhee didn't bother answering him, instead looking to their uncle to question the yearling about his son's whereabouts.

As much as the Xi wanted to keep up with the conversation, her godmother's arrival stole her attention. Without a second thought, Towhee padded over to Finley, nudging her chin and then swiping her tongue over the side of the Alpha's muzzle. She could see that Finley was deeply worried about Eljay too. She wanted to say something reassuring but Towhee wasn't the sort to offer up generic platitudes. Instead, she swung to stand hip to hip with the slightly shorter she-wolf and bump shoulders with her to let her know, "I'm here."

This allowed her a better view of Elwood and Gannet again. She caught snatches of the conversation from this angle but they were talking too quickly for her to truly hope to keep up. Towhee sighed lightly in her chest but refocused her attention on Finley again, nibbling comfortingly along her silver neck.

Gannet saw that Elwood gave him a significant look when he identified the sound as Towhee, but he was about to ignore it.  Before he could ask what was wrong with her, however, Elwood continued to the purpose of the calling him here.  Question for later.

Oh. Eljay.  "He's testing," Gannet responded calmly, certain everyone here would be the same on hearing that explanation.  Eljay seemed to know what he wanted to do, so as far as Gannet was concerned, there was nothing to worry about.  His tail gave a little wag, and he smiled, hoping to diffuse some of his Alpha's obvious worry.

Elwood's heart dropped with Finley's arrival. He had hoped to figure this whole thing out before telling her what was going on, but he could tell by the look on her face that she knew that Eljay was gone. If he had to bet, he would guess that she blamed herself; her expression said so, and he remembered Eljay's reaction to Finley's heat and the strife it had caused between mother and son.

He watched her for a lingering moment, then turned his attention back to Gannet. Towhee shifted to reassure her godmother physically, for which he was grateful, as Gannet responded to his question. "He's testing," the boy said in a matter-of-fact manner, like it made perfect sense. Elwood blinked, considering the two simple words carefully, but came to the conclusion that he didn't understand what Gannet meant.

"Testing? Testing what?" he asked.

Two of the three noticed her arrival. One moved towards her and Finley shifted to allow Towhee to provide whatever comfort she would attempt to give. It helped, but only slightly. She leaned gently into her goddaughter as Gannet gave his matter-of-fact explanation as to where her son had gone. Confusion twisted into a frown upon her face as she stared at the alabaster youth. What was he talking about? And how could he so calmly stand there and say such nonsense?

Anger bubbled in her chest, slowly replacing the guilt and concern at the forefront of her mind. She remained quiet as Elwood questioned him further, taking slow, long breaths in an effort to reel her wild emotions back in. The alpha realized that her anger was being driven by pregnancy hormones, so she tried to put in the effort to not explode like the crazy pregnant lady she was.

She caught the word "testing" being tossed back and forth between the two males, though Towhee couldn't puzzle out the context. She didn't try too hard. She kept her focus upon the Alpha female, who didn't seem in the least cheered by her companionship nor the conversation taking place in front of them. Still, Towhee kept nudging, nosing and nuzzling Finley in an effort to be comforting and supportive.

Not for the first time, Gannet felt a sense of gentle exasperation at the inability for others to understand his very clear (...) explanation.  Everything.  Eljay was testing himself, so he was testing everything. 

"He wanted to go," Gannet responded, instead going a different route.  He was focused on his conversation with Elwood, so he hadn't yet noticed Finley's agitation.  "He wants to be better."  The gist of their conversation at least.

Elwood could feel the tension radiating from Finley, and he threw another thankful glance in Towhee's direction as the youth continued to try to reassure her aunt. Meanwhile, Gannet patiently explained what he meant, though his clarification was still short and lacking in details. The Alpha thought he was beginning to see Eljay's reasoning, however.

"He wants to be better," he repeated quietly as he processed the information. "So he decided to go out on his own? To...improve his skills?" he wondered, shifting his gaze to Finley for a moment. Maybe Eljay thought he could get better at hunting, exploring, and taking care of himself; but Elwood wished that he could have done that at home, or after letting his parents know of his intentions. "Did he say where he was going? Or when he will be back?" He couldn't bring himself to ask the other part of that question -- did Eljay plan to come back at all?

exit Fin ;_;

The conversation continued doing nothing to answer any of the questions that spun inside of Finley's head. All the while, Towhee poked and prodded at her in an effort to be of some comfort to her. It wasn't helpful, really. It was actually rather annoying, as was pretty much everything happening at that moment. Her agitation was distracted by Gannet, however, as he "explained" about Eljay's reasons for leaving.

None of it made any sense. But then... it did. Eljay had never behaved as though he considered himself to be worth any of the love he received. It was her fault, of course, for failing him when he was a child. He wouldn't have half of the problems he had today were it not for her attempted abandonment, or so she told herself. He'd never felt as though he was good enough, so maybe Gannet was right. Maybe he'd left to test himself, to make himself better, because she'd never been enough to make him see that he was.

Fin turned abruptly and walked away before Gannet could answer her mate's questions. It didn't matter where he went, and whatever timeline he'd given for his return would mean nothing once he was lost with no knowledge of how to get home. Her son was gone, like both of her daughters. What did any of these ancillary reasons for it matter. There was only one reason for any of this - she was a terrible mother.

She tried hard not to think of the puppies still in her belly as she began to run.

When Finley turned and fled, Towhee was torn. Should she go after her or leave the poor woman alone? She looked to Elwood, frowning sympathetically at him. Gannet's answers were cold comfort. Eljay was still gone and nobody could say if he would return. Towhee had never been close to her eldest brother and they were very different. But she was still upset over the loss, mostly for her godparents' sakes.

-I'll go after her, make sure she's okay...- she eventually signed to her uncle and brother, frowning thoughtfully as she turned and slowly padded in the direction Finley had gone.

Gannet nodded, and though the answer seemed obvious to him, he humored his uncle by stating it.  "When he's better."  It wasn't a super specific timeline, but it was clear that the decision to return would be on Eljay and Eljay alone.  He felt he had to do this, so he would, and if he wanted to come back, he would.  

He watched Finley leave with some confusion, unsure why she would be upset.  Didn't Liffey and Whip and Ferret and practically everyone do the same? He wasn't sure why she was so upset.  It wasn't like Peter.  His tail thumped once or twice, and he turned a questioning look at Elwood.  Was he upset too?

Elwood's attention was only drawn away from Gannet when Finley suddenly departed, followed closely by Towhee. He frowned after them, fighting the urge to go comfort his mate himself. Surely Eljay's "test" would be a lingering topic of conversation between them, but for now, he recognized her need to remove herself from the situation. Finley had never been great at handling her emotions; he wasn't sure how helpful she would let Towhee be, but he appreciated his goddaughter's efforts nonetheless.

With a sigh, he turned back towards Gannet, who had replied to Elwood's last question with another concise yet simultaneously abstract answer. There was a bemused expression on his face, but, as always, Gannet seemed to be seeing the positive side; his tail tapped the ground a few times as he awaited an explanation from Elwood. "Thank you for telling us," he finally said earnestly after a few moments of silence. He glanced in the direction Finley and Towhee had gone before continuing.

"It's just...hard for us to hear. We didn't know he was planning to leave in order to test himself." He almost added, "We didn't know Eljay felt that way" -- but that wasn't true. Eljay had suffered from low self-esteem from childhood, so despite the shock that they felt, it wasn't necessarily surprising. With a small, sad smile, he added, "We miss him."

Gannet nodded when Elwood thanked him, his tail still going.  He sensed his uncle's unhappiness, but it wasn't directed at him, so he assumed it was ok that he didn't worry about it.  When Elwood said what was causing it, though, it did confuse Gannet a bit.

"If you knew, would it be better?" He finally asked, genuinely curious.  Either way, Eljay would still be gone to the same place for the same reason.  So why did that matter?  His confidence in his cousin returning didn't seem to be a sentiment shared by the rest of his family, a fact that was bringing him down a tad.  Did they know something he didn't?

The boy's question brought Elwood pause. It was something he hadn't thought of; how would they have reacted had Eljay approached them with his plans? He liked to think they would have been supportive...but would that have really been the case? Already, Elwood could imagine himself trying to talk Eljay out of it.

"No, I guess not," he conceded after a moment of contemplation. No matter how this had transpired, he didn't think he would like it. "I'm going to go check on Aunt Fin, make sure she's okay. Thanks for filling us in, Gannet." He gave his nephew an appreciative smile, then reached out to touch his shoulder with the tip of his nose before departing in the direction that Finley and Towhee had gone.