Firefly Glen the woodchuck song

She usually slept like a baby and woke each morning totally refreshed. But last night, she tossed and turned, her mind never quite willing to shut down for proper sleep. Meerkat thought about Atlas's promotion and what it might mean for them; she pondered the whereabouts of Rusalka and, specifically Kaertok, who may or may not even want to meet her; and then, of course, she fretted about Fennec's whereabouts, even though she had always just taken her sister to be a free spirit.

She felt groggy and a little out of sorts all morning, though a drink and a meal helped restore some of her chipper nature. Meerkat went bounding through the glen, thinking about where to head next in her line of inquiry. Maybe she should ask Osiris or one of the other, newer leaders if they knew about Rusalka. That thought made her slow to a stop, gulping. Atlas was now second-in-command and Meerkat liked to think this changed nothing, yet surely it did. Was her totally out of her league now?

Suddenly ruminative again, she walked more slowly now. Meerkat found herself craving her brother's company. It would be a good chance to check in about the latest on Fen. Dropping her nose to the cool, crackling grass, she tried to find @Bronco's scent and began to track it. She could just call for him, yet she decided to try finding him first, to avoid any possible alarm.

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As he returned to the Glen after having wandered around the lake near the Heartwood, Bronco's spirits were low. He hadn't eaten yet, but he'd had a noticeable lack of apetite lately, and had been spending too much energy wandering and searching the nearby areas without turning up any trace of Fennec's scent. If she had disappeared from the area, she was out of reach by now. And there was an entire world for her to get lost in, so he was beginning to lose hope. Just staging an all-out searching mission wasn't the best option- not with Winter coming soon. But he couldn't put his spirit to rest at night knowing he hadn't done everything he possibly could to find her.

He was wandering along the borders and wondering if he might be given leave to go on an extended scouting mission when the breeze ruffled his fur, and brought Meerkat's scent to him. He felt bad- he'd hardly spent much time with her the past week or so, compared to how he normally made himself present in her life just about every day. So when he caught sight of her trailing along behind him he stopped, and lowered his head to greet her with a low chuff when she approached.

When she found him, Bronco looked like she felt: very tired. She shuffled forward and greeted him with a responding woof, then bumped her muzzle against his chin. Her tail waved, a little slower than usual, tapping gently against his nearer hind leg with every languid sweep.

Meerkat thought about asking him how the search was going, though his demeanor was very telling. Instead, she offered another, sympathetic bump and tried to distract him by saying, "Did I tell you I'm trying to hunt down my biological father? His name's Kaertok. Hey, you don't happen to know anything about Rusalka, do you?"

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He appreciated her empathy, and nuzzled her ruff a bit, feeling himself relax a little bit knowing that someone seemed to understand how he felt without asking a bunch of prying questions. He knew Meerkat wasn't happy about Fennec going missing either, so it was a pain they shared, not something he had to explain to someone who had no idea what was going on. There were thousands of reasons for him to love his little sister already- and she gave him more every day.

He certainly was distracted and surprised when she mentioned her biological father. Overtired, Bronco first wondered if this meant that Phox was missing too- but then, of course, he remembered that Phox wasn't actually Meerkat's biological father. He realized then how little he'd ever thought about there being another male involved in Towhee's life- the only time he'd probably ever thought about it had been the time Towhee had explained how puppies were made to Meerkat. Oddly, his stomach didn't twinge now, the way it had when he'd thought about things before.

“That's news to me,” He said thoughtfully. He wasn't really aware that Towhee had even known who Meerkat's father was- but then again, he hadn't really asked her any questions about Meerkat's conception. It hadn't exactly been a topic he'd been comfortable talking about. But he felt kind of strange talking to Meerkat about finding her biological father, considering the fact that Phox, Towhee and Niamh had raised her. She had a surplus in the parent division already- as well as several protective and loving older siblings- but he, like her, was curious about the idea of her finding the one who'd made her. -“Rusalka?”- He asked, and he frowned slightly. “I think I heard Mom talking about it a long time ago; they live out by the sea,” He said. From what he could recall, though, most of what his mother had said about Rusalka was not exactly decent enough to be repeated. “Why? Do you think he's there?” He asked, figuring there must have been some common ground between the topic of her biological father, and the pack that his mother absolutely detested.

She nodded acknowledgement. "Yeah, mom kinda gave me a mission when I went there for breakfast the other day," Meerkat shared. "She doesn't know him well herself, though she said I should have the chance to find and talk to him if I want. And I do, even if I'll never think of him as my dad."

The pack's name seemed to strike him as familiar and he mentioned the seaside. Meerkat felt her little burst of hopefulness wither. "Not anymore. At least, they're not at the moors. Mom gave me a couple leads, that was one of them. They probably moved somewhere else, just gotta figure out where." And that could wait for another day.

There was something else pressing on her mind, rising up to eclipse her thoughts about her mission to find Kaertok. "Hey, can I talk to you about something? It's about Atlas," Meerkat asked, her voice a little quieter than usual, an introspective light to her brown eyes as they rested on her brother's face.

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He was surprised that Towhee might task Meerkat with finding her biological father on her own. To Bronco, it seemed almost dangerous- he wouldn't have wanted to go out into the wilderness at nine months of age to find a male that he didn't know, with the intention of informing them that they were his father. And he considered this happening from Meerkat's perspective- a young, impressionable woman, going out on her own in search of a man her own mother had never really talked about. He had to have faith, then, that Towhee figured this guy was safe enough that Meerkat could go and see him on her own, without him freaking out when he found out that he had a daughter. In his opinion, this was news that would have been best delivered by Towhee herself- and he was curious why she hadn't chosen to go and find him on her own. But these matters were deeply personal...So he kept his opinions to himself.

“Wow...That's gotta be kind of,” He said, and he wasn't able to find the word for it. Meerkat had not grown up without a father, as she'd been fortunate enough to have Phox in her life. He couldn't help but envy her, now- knowing that she had both Phox and now this other guy too, even if he wasn't a father figure. It made him miss Colt, but he didn't want to dampen Meerkat's excitement either with his worries or with his grief. He considered things from a different angle, then. How would he feel if he was in Kaertok's place, and he found out suddenly that this amazing young woman was his daughter? “I hope you find him. Anyone would be lucky to find out that they're related to you,” He said, and gave her cheek a gentle nudge.

She seemed to want to bring something else up and he was surprised- this was a lot of news all at once, but he stiffened when she mentioned Atlas' name. She was seriously still thinking about him? He had nothing against Atlas- but it still seemed too soon for Meerkat to be developing a crush on anyone. Her tone was quiet, and she seemed almost ashamed to be asking, so he wondered then if perhaps he'd said something, or had done something. The fur along his nape prickled slightly, but he did well to remain calm and keep himself from jumping to conclusions. -“What about Atlas?”- He asked evenly. It didn't matter if Atlas was the beta- Bronco would tear him a new one if he'd done anything to make Meerkat upset.

He began to say something, though he trailed off momentarily. Meerkat looked at him guilelessly, blinking when he didn't finish his sentence. She appreciated his affectionate sentiments and rewarded him with a somewhat weary smile, though she still quietly wondered what he'd left off from articulating entirely.

But the subject effectively shifted and Meerkat drew in a deep breath when Bronco's question indicated his openness to the topic. "I really like him. And I'm pretty sure he likes me too. We've been spending time together, talking, getting to know each other..." They even had a date coming up soon, whenever it snowed. That thought made her heart thump.

She trailed off herself for a beat, trying to think of how to express herself. "But he's a leader now," she said. Meerkat didn't suffer from any degree of self-consciousness normally, though she knew she was still very young. And perhaps because of that, she was both impressed and intimidated in equal measure. "That changes things, doesn't it?" Meerkat added slowly, eyes glistering as they bored into Bronco's, hoping he'd reassure her, tell her she was wrong.

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He tried not to frown when Meerkat said that she had feelings for Atlas- real feelings. His own reaction made him feel disappointed in himself for being so sullen and spiteful, but given how things were in his life at the moment, he couldn't honestly appreciate that his sister was going through her first real crush. He wasn't even sure he could force himself to say what he might've said, had he not felt so heartbroken about Fennec's disappearance, and he found himself struggling to think of something to say that wasn't simply a warning. He hated disappointing his sister, but at the same time, he would never want her to feel the way that he felt right now.

She didn't seem to be terribly concerned about the possibility that her feelings might be unrequited- in fact, she seemed to think he liked her back. The lines on his forehead deepened slightly. So- obviously the two had been talking, and potentially spending time together. She admitted to it. He wasn't sure where he was supposed to stand for this- as he was her guardian, he wasn't sure if it was expected also that he make sure she wasn't willingly wearing her heart on her sleeve so that it could get broken. Phox and Towhee were a decent jaunt away, so Meerkat couldn't have been expected to go back and forth to ask them questions about dating and relationships so...He supposed, he might have to do. But what would Phox and Towhee want him to say, and was that the stance he was supposed to take?

Part of him wondered why it was that it bothered him now, that Meerkat and Atlas were spending time together. He wondered what Altas' intentions were, and if he should have a talk with him just to make sure that he was aware that Meerkat had real feelings for him. It was one thing to flirt a bit, but he did not like the idea that someone might intentionally string his little sister along, only for her to find out later that they'd had no actual intentions of returning those feelings. Atlas didn't seem like the type but...

...One could never be sure. One moment he'd been invited to spend the winter alongside someone, and the next, she'd vanished.

He sighed. He was definitely not in the right state to be handling this, but he couldn't avoid the topic now that it'd come up. “I...I don't think him being a beta would change things, no,” He said. “He'll have a different role at the borders, and for pack decisions, but otherwise...His life is probably just about the same as it was before,” He said. After all- in Bronco's opinion, the only difference between being a beta and being a general member of the pack was that a beta could make executive decisions and admit a new wolf into the pack. Others could only vouch for them. “Plus, he's not alone. It's a team of all three of them,” He said, before he went back to considering the fact that she had feelings- actual feelings.

“Just...Make sure you guard your heart a little bit though, OK?” He asked. He didn't want to tell her to prepare for heartbreak but...He also didn't want her to be completely unprepared for what could possibly happen. If he could spare her the agony of ever feeling heartbreak, he would- but for now this was all that he could do to potentially prepare her to face it on her own, if it ever happened.

Although he spoke haltingly, he said exactly what she'd hoped he would. Meerkat's ears tipped forward as if eager to drink in more of what he had to say on the matter, which wasn't far from the truth. He reminded her of what being a leader meant, practically speaking. It did reassure her, though not entirely. Surely stepping up into such an important role could change Atlas's whole mindset on, well, life. And to think, he'd asked her to coach him. A quiet little laugh escaped her at how absurd that seemed now.

Bronco offered a word of warning, which Meerkat pondered in silence, along with everything else. Eventually, she said, "What if he's—" She stopped mid-sentence to purse her lips and gather her thoughts. "He's a Beta now. He was already a catch before. He could take his pick of any woman in the pack, or outside of it..." And she still felt like a little girl. Now her ears twisted backward. "I know I'm pretty great," she went on to say with another little laugh, "but... I dunno." And that was the gist of it. A lot of how this might play out remained to be seen.

Because of what he'd just said, Meerkat really did wonder though. Why should she guard her heart, if nothing was going to change? Maybe he only said that because he was a good older brother, trying to spare her feelings and tell her what she wanted to hear. Would it be better if she stopped pursuing Atlas, maybe even called off their date? But how could she simply stop how she felt about him? Meerkat could control her actions, she supposed, but she couldn't simply flip a switch on her emotions.

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Bronco had imagined that Meerkat had thought that by becoming a leader, Atlas' priorities might have changed, giving him less time to spend with her and less energy to do so. His advice had come from what he'd seen from other leaders, who still managed to carry on with their lives, raise families, have friends and spend time with both their loved ones and taking down problems without letting others down. He thought, because of her question, that she might have been worried simply that he wouldn't have time for her anymore- but she clarified, and he shook his head, and drew her in close.

“No no, Meerk, no,” He said softly, murmuring into the tan fur of her shoulder, before he let her go. She really did seem to have her heart fixed on Atlas- and the worries that she expressed now seemed to come from a place of insecurity, and he never wanted his little sister to feel like she wasn't enough for someone. “Rank doesn't give anyone the entitlement to pick and choose as they will. Sure, some wolves might be drawn to leaders because they want power, but you like Atlas because he's Atlas, right?” He asked, drawing back and searching for her autumn-leaf gaze. “And if he likes you, then he likes you for you. You're pretty special, Meerk.” He said. He drew in a breath. “And if that changes because his rank makes him feel like he's above liking someone lower in the ranks...Then he doesn't deserve you.” He said. “Then, he deserves a smack from your big brother for being an idiot.” He said, nudging her chin in an attempt to draw a smile to her features.

There would never come a day where Bronco pulled her into an embrace and Meerkat responded by doing anything other than leaning into it. Maybe she would be an adult soon, though she would never outgrow this. She also knew he would always be there for her, no matter how things worked out with Atlas.

He made a point that had her heart soaring again. He was right, her feelings for Atlas had nothing to do with his rank. Meerkat would be lying if she didn't find him even more attractive for it, though her feelings certainly didn't hinge on his status. Perhaps the same went for him and he would like her just the same, regardless of what funky Greek letters they respectively sported.

Bronco went on to say that if his rank did change anything, that just meant Atlas didn't deserve her. Her stomach dropped a little. She swallowed and nodded. She supposed that was true, though of course the mere thought pained Meerkat. Her lips curved into a tiny smile as she pictured Bronco slapping Atlas, though she dearly hoped it never came to that.

"I haven't actually talked to him since the announcement," Meerkat admitted, smiling into it when her brother chucked her chin. "I should probably do that, huh?" She laughed, a little more richly this time. "We're kind of meant to go on a date soon anyway," she also confessed, blushing happily.

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The soft smile he'd adorned to cheer Meerkat up stayed on his lips, before it faded away. It felt tiresome to make himself smile, though he would run himself ragged, every time, if it would mean he could keep Meerkat happy. She seemed young to be experiencing these feelings- but then again, he probably should have realized that his perspective was likely a bit off-kilter, given the fact that he was a bit late realizing that he was capable of having feelings for someone. Perhaps he'd had crushes before- but nothing that he'd ever felt needed to be discussed or shared with any other members of his family. He was glad, as well, that Meerkat felt comfortable enough to come and talk to him about these things- and he hoped that she always would be.

And while it stressed him out to think that Meerkat had an official date planned...He had to consider the fact that this was Atlas she was talking about, and that he might not have to be terribly concerned about her. While he did want to ask where and when, and part of him thought maybe he could spy, just to make sure he didn't try anything stupid- he didn't feel like he'd have to worry about that. He remembered how he'd felt when Fennec had chosen to go journeying with Penn...And he felt that that worry had been valid. But Meerkat with Atlas? Maybe it wasn't so bad.

She'd admitted this to him almost shyly, which was an unusual thing for Meerkat, so he figured it would be best not to freak out on her or ask too many questions. More than anything, she probably wanted reassurance and support. He wasn't sure he had the spirit to be a total optimist but...he could be a good big brother.

“Is that so?” He asked. “Well, d'you have a plan? Something fun or something with a bit of sweeping romance?” It hurt his heart to ask for something he yearned for. He would shush his inner demons for now, for the sake of his sister. “Y'know there's...A ledge, on the North-East side of the lake, that kind of over-looks it. You can see Moonspear from it, and it's...A pretty place. You could watch the sunset there. And don't worry, I promise I won't hover but...” He trailed off, and shrugged. “I...I'll never be too far away, either, so. And besides, if he pisses you off, you can just shove him off the ledge yourself.” He said with a dry chuckle.

Bronco seemed interested about this date, pressing for details. Meerkat's skin felt overly warm, though she smiled as she told him, "We spent the other day searching for the perfect spot to watch the first snowfall." She fell quiet as he made another suggestion, to which she said, "Ooh, thanks, I'll keep that in mind for future dates, supposing there are any," and tried not to grin like an idiot. "We both enjoy sunsets, plus stargazing too once it gets dark." She would never forget that first evening they'd spent together.

He promised he wouldn't hover, though Meerkat appreciated his reminder that he would always be there, especially if things went pear-shaped. She simply couldn't fathom Atlas pissing her off, not just because she didn't think anyone had ever accomplished that but also because, well, it was Atlas. He was a gentleman, soft-spoken and so dreamy...

Blinking to focus, Meerkat favored her older brother with a soft smile and told him, "It means a lot, being able to talk to you. Thank you for listening and giving me advice. I hope I can do the same for you someday. Are there any ladies who've captured your fancy?" she suddenly wondered.

It seemed like Meerkat and Atlas were actually taking this fairly seriously- at least, according to Meerkat who went on to explain that they'd even scoped out their makeout spot already. He wondered where it was, and felt part of himself wondering if he should ask...Just so that he knew where she would be, in case of whatever kind of emergency someone could have while on a date. She'd set him up on a 'date' with Toad Amelia, but had tagged along for the experience but that didn't mean he felt like ought to chaperone Meerkat while she was out with Atlas. Besides- they were just going to be watching the first snowfall together...Did that make him feel jealous? A bit. He'd forgotten that this would be her first winter, and what it felt like to see real snow for the first time. It was something a wolf could easily tire of- but that didn't mean that the first experience hadn't been sort of magical. 

He was reminded of Phox when she mentioned stargazing, and that made him smile softly. He couldn't be that bad of a guy if he had the patience to watch the stars. If Phox was to be considered an example of what the general star-gazer was, then he figured he'd have even less to worry about if Atlas was a star-gazer too. 

He appreciated the reminder that she loved him, and her openness with him warmed his heart a bit. While he was worried about her, he realized he was likely just projecting some of his own experiences into her situation, and expecting that she too might get her heart stomped on. It wasn't something he would always be able to protect her from but...He could try. He nuzzled the fur on the top of her head, where it faded to a slightly darker hade of beige and felt a pang of regret hit his heart when she asked about his love life. He forced out another dry chuckle which was brittle at best, but it was all that he could manage. 

"No one for me, right now." He said. "So I hope you're not going to be taking too much time swooning over Atlas; I still need your help finding the perfect someone too, y'know," He said.

His laugh rang a little hollow, though he sounded like himself when he responded. Meerkat opted to take his answer at face value. The look she gave him spoke of an affection so deep, she knew no one else in her life—not even her eventual mate, Atlas or otherwise—would best this particular relationship. Bronco had always and would always have a special place in her life.

"Of course," she replied simply, shifting so they were seated more properly side by side and letting her head rest comfortably on his shoulder.