Ouroboros Spine your picture as i paint it

he's looking for @Kukutux but i left this all welcome so absolutely no pressure, ebony! <3

for the moonqueen, kivaluk searches. wanting to speak with her.

it has been some time since he has sought out her wisdom, her words that are always of a great comfort to him.

he knows she is expecting ... and has deigned to give both her and his mother space.

and he happy for them! proud and content that his mother has found the love she deserved, the stability when kigipigak did not offer it to her.

did not offer it to kivaluk himself, either.

the winterthaw is upon them, the ground softening as the days came and went. this particular morning was dreary, overcast but this did not deter kivaluk despite how he almost craved the warmth of the sun.

ponderous with her pregnancy, the moonwoman looked up toward kivaluk's face as he drew closer.

the day was wet with rain.

she wondered if it would be this hour that he shared his mind.

"star-hunter and i have spoken. are you ready to be firsthunter?"

it would be some time. he was young. but he was capable.

kukutux offered him a stick of dried trout-meat as she waited to hear the youthful hunter's words.

kukutux arrives ... and sees her as his mother's wife and not his aunt, as she once was.

which puts kivaluk in a strange place of being unsure what to call her now.

kukutux's question wasn't why he'd sought her out, but he would respond first before unearthing his thoughts to her.

i am, kivaluk responds with a firm nod. ...as long as the offer still stands. his mind had not been as focused as it should be. not lately. and he would not argue nor gripe if someone else was chosen for first hunter.

someone with age, more experience, or even more deserving.

he hasn't exactly been the posterchild of a son ... or of a packmember.

which reminded him of what he wished to speak about.

kukutux... he begins, her name a soft hesitation upon his lips. i haven't really ... had a chance to speak with you or my mother since you two've become mates. and i know my opinions do not matter but i wanted to tell you that i'm real happy for you and my mother. i'm glad she has you. she deserves happiness and stability, y'know?

a rhetorical question which hinted at the resentment he's unintentionally begun to harbor towards kigipigak whom has left twice now.

kukutux looked toward kivaluk, searching for the place behind his eyes. the offer stood. it was not only an offer, it was rightfully earned. he was a young man but he had the guidance of moonglow.

he spoke of herself, of sakhmet. kukutux felt her lips lift in a smile. and she heard the slight against his father, and knew another must be gathered to that place.

"you are the son of our hearth also," moonwoman said to the young hunter, her eyes touching his own. "what you say i give to your mother, i offer also to you."

kigipigak had gone his own way. it did not mean that kivaluk too must be cut adrift.

kivaluk is quiet, fighting against the thick lump of emotion that lodges itself in his throat when she speaks of him being son of their hearth, too. that she could be the happiness and stability that he had yearned for himself.

perhaps, with time, it would be enough to fill the bits of kivaluk carved out with his brother and father's leaving.

he tries to speak, words choking him, before he clamps his muzzle shut with an audible click of teeth. i'd like that. he manages to wrangle out in little more than a whisper.

kukutux kept her warm gaze upon kivaluk

"first, think of the children your mother holds beneath her heart; they will be brothers and sisters to you."

so long as he wished this.

"they will look to sivullik and see that he is something to strive for."

words of true praise. moonwoman invited him forward into her embrace. growing though he was, child no longer, kivaluk still needed the love of a mother.

now he would have two. 

thick emotion curls in his throat, catching in his breath.

of course. kivaluk whispers hoarsely 'round the ball of emotion lodged in his throat. all of my baby siblings will know that i love them. it wasn't even looking up to that kivaluk wanted: only that they knew him and he, them. that they knew they could come to him and he would listen or advise and protect them.

he would be here.

and when invited into her embrace he falls into it a bit harder than he meant to; craving it. not realizing how much he'd needed it.

she would hold him as long as he needed.

name him son. name him as firsthunter.

he had earned much and her pride was only one of these things.

threading with you is always a pleasure, eb. feel free to archive as is or with your reply. <333

life had taken much from him in his short span of it.

first, kigipigak. then sakhmet and akkuma. then kigipigak again.

to kivaluk, it seems horrendously unfair but he is grown enough to understand that life was full of these ups and downs. he simply had to figure out what kind of man he'd allow these large moments of grief and anger ( and resentment, if we're forcing kivaluk to be honest with himself ) turn him into.

a loyal man.

a man determined to be a better brother, a better son.

and perhaps, if it was destined: a better husband and father.

kivaluk takes a deep breath, reluctantly ending their embrace. he has a lot to think on and wishes to consider these things on his own, for a bit.

thank you, anaa. he presses a kiss to kukutux's cheek before venturing off towards the borders, where the rhythm of patrol helps him process.