Redsand Canyon Your kisses are poison and all your words are treason

It took them a few weeks, but at length, Fennec and @Figment were able to track down where @Killdeer was. And Fennec was conflicted to also find @Towhee's scent there, as well as her dad's and a few others she recognized. So this was where they'd ended up.

She didn't hesitate before calling for her son, though she knew others would probably come. She didn't want to own up to what had happened, didn't really feel like telling her mom or her dad how everything had gone down in flames, mainly because she was afraid they'd say the same things that Bronco did. Fig hadn't, but Fig always seemed to understand. Towhee had always talked about how great it was to keep a distance from her relationships, how mating was overrated. What would her mom think of her, knowing she'd flown off the handle just because she couldn't handle something casual?

And Killdeer... what was she even going to say....

As tempting as it was to bash his dad, she knew she couldn't in front of him. She was going to have to be careful, and she sat down patiently to wait, going over the options silently in her mind.

decided to toss them at this so we could work out where we wanted to send them next <3 since fennec wouldn't leave. AW but def happy for any tagged to hop in! (Including @Phox ofc if you want <3)

germanicus was experienced enough in the world to know that the woman at mereo's borders was blind.

he approached then with a deliberately heavier step than he might have used on another occasion.

her calls had been for killdeer, the sound of a mother summoning her son. he extrapolated that she was one of towhee's daughters.

"i am germanicus, imperator of mereo. killdeer is one of my new soldiers. towhee and phox have also chosen this place as their residence."

he waited for confirmation of their familial ties.

Kallik arrived a little after the imperator, having picked up the scent of a stranger during one of his many patrols, and then heard the call. 

He took his usual place near Germanicus, at his side but held back just a little to show deference. He would take up his silent guard while the imperator figured out what this blind stranger wanted from Mereo.

He mentioned the members of Towhee's family that already resided within the canyon, which made Kallik wonder if he suspected the woman was related. He was interested to hear her response.

Like all of his children, Fennec could do no wrong. The problem was that Fennec did less wrong than the rest of them somehow. Phox had always adored her, in spite of (or perhaps because of) her spicy personality.

So when her call came for Killdeer, Phox made no hesitation in heading toward it, uninvited. He’d been beat by both Germanicus and Kalik, but that didn’t stop Phox from pushing past them to give his daughter a wolfish hug.

Fennec! he greeted cheerfully. I see you’ve found us. Phox’s demeanor was, as it so often was, open and friendly. His tail wagged, his eyes were bright, and his mood was chipper.

She heard someone coming and could tell immediately it was no one that she had called for or expected. Fennec felt a sense of tension fill her at the thought of dealing with whoever it was - and whatever they wanted. She just wanted to check on her son, deliver her news, and then get the fuck out.

I need to talk to him, Fennec answered. I'm not here for anything else. I just need to tell my son something. It wasn't the kind of news you delivered via proxy. If he didn't come, she might not have a choice... and what then? The thought hurt, but so had a lot recently.

Phox approached with an overwhelming amount of chipperness, something there was no way she could summon a match to. Hey dad. Fig is around here somewhere. Where's Killer? She needed to bypass the questions. The 'how are you's and the 'what's new' had no good answers and she didn't have the energy to pretend right now. Especially in front of a crowd.

I swear I resisted as best as I could

Like the little moon orbiting the sun that he was, Fig had trailed after Fenn when she'd gone to Mereo to see her son. He'd wanted to follow her all the way to the borders, but he knew the conversation she wished to have was likely a private one. So, he'd held back. Mostly. He was far enough away to be a blip on the landscape, if anyone looked closely. But, he was close enough to see when multiple wolves approached his sister on the borders, men by the look of them, and rather fierce-looking ones at that.

And so, the little moon came zipping over to the sun.

He relaxed when he spotted a familiar face amongst those who had come to greet Fennec, his tail beginning to wag at the sight. He stilled his excitement so as to maintain his dignity in front of these strange, impressive men that stood at his father's side. He took his usual spot at Fenn's shoulder, his posture neutral but confident, his smile friendly though his eyes were wary. He dipped his muzzle to greet them, pausing to give his father a smile meant just for him, but otherwise said nothing.

more family business.

phox was present and the imperator saw no reason for himself and kallik to linger.

"killdeer is on patrol. it may be some time before he returns." she was his mother and seemed distraught. germanicus did not think offering himself as messenger was appropriate but it might be the swiftest way.

"you are welcome to wait beside the tablinum. i will escort you." his eyes appraised the wolf who had appeared beside her. another relative, he supposed.

Kallik couldn't help the flare of protective anger in his chest when the imperator offered for the strangers to wait near the tablinum—near his pregnant wife. Towhee's family or not, he didn't like the idea of them being that close to Aquene. He knew it couldn't always be helped, with her being the medicus, but that didn't mean he liked it one bit. 

So he tensed next to Germanicus. He intended to escort them, as well. He would also remain near the tablinum. He refused to let his wife be near strangers alone. Her pregnancy was fairly progressed at this point, and because of that his worry was overbearing.

feel free to skip phox if he's dismissed here!

His face dropped when she replied, if only because he had hoped for a more... jovial reunion. Perhaps like the one he'd had with Towhee. Instead, it felt like a whole different ballgame. Phox looked to Germanicus, who provided the answer to Fennec's question.

Fig! You too! Phox said, his face brightening yet again at the sight of one of his children showing up. The Redhawks really were like tribbles. You could never have just one.

He knew better than to ask either of them if they were staying, since he knew the answer was likely not what he wished to hear. And he didn't want to make them say it out loud when it was obvious that they would be going their own way.

Germanicus, these are my son and daughter. He returned his gaze to his children once more. You'll be in good hands. And we can always catch up once I'm finished with work. He had a feeling Germanicus wouldn't enjoy Phox lollygagging with his children all day "catching up" when there were patrols and spars to attend to.

we can have a separate thread or y'all can make assumptions off of this, whatever is best! Just let me know <3

Fennec didn't notice her dad's crestfallen reaction and was too tied up in her own feelings to even consider it. She did feel a heavy dose of disappointment when he immediately went to dismiss himself, despite her previous feelings. But she let it go by silently, every minute realizing more and more that she didn't want to be here anyway.

Sure. It was a general response to everyone. She'd follow where Germanicus led and, when @Killdeer arrived, she would tell him what had happened. We aren't settling in the Emberwood anymore. Your dad left, I'm not sure where he went. I'm going to travel with your uncle Fig for a while. I'll come find you here when I know what comes next.

It would have to be enough of an explanation. She didn't want to go into details and she had no clue where she was aiming to go next. She'd had plans and now those were shattered to pieces - she had no intentions of making more.

MOM!!!

The cry echoed off the rocks of the canyon, bounced into the air to be heard by whoever-be-damned as the boy-almost-man loped up the slopes, paws skittering rocks behind him.

Oh, he had missed her.

He bypassed Kallik and Germanicus—ooooops, he was supposed to be on patrol; he'd explain himself later—and Phox and Figment and—

Mom, he murmured, burying his snout into her ruff with careless abandon. He snuffled a little, then pulled back, grinning. What are you doing here? Are you coming to stay?! Is my Dad around? What's going on?

Almost everyone he loved was in this spot, right now, and he was in heaven.

Could it get better?

Fig had no idea what a tablinum was, but he was an observant creature. He saw the way the other tensed when it was suggested, though the man said nothing. He had no way of knowing how in control this alpha was of his subjects, but he also had no way of telling Fenn to decline the offer. Fortunately, it didn't prove to be necessary, for Killdeer appeared on the scene in all of his cheerful glory.

The sight made his heart ache, for he alone knew the news Fennec had come to share with me. He gave his nephew a smile, hoping to use it to mask his pity. He looked to his father then hopefully. "What work do you have? Could I help you? Give Fenn and Killer some time together?" he offered hopefully, wanting not only to give Fenn her privacy, but also to spend a little time with his dad.

She didn't want to follow, but Fennec sensed that she did not have much choice. It was tempting to step off and go to find her son immediately, but fortunately she was spared from even thinking of it by Killdeer's sudden appearance. He was so happy. Fennec managed to summon a smile, but his enthusiasm (and questions) felt like a punch to the stomach. Is my dad around?

Hey, Killer. It's good to see you too. I missed you. She returned the affection with a lingering squeeze, then stepped back and tried to draw him aside. She didn't really want to have this conversation in front of everyone, a fact that Figment had luckily caught onto. She could hear him helping to play distraction as well.

I actually came to let you know, we aren't settling in the Emberwood anymore. Your uncle and I are going to take... a little bit of a trip. She paused, unsure of how to continue. She'd planned the words, but they seemed so vague. Maybe the simple truth was the best. I don't know where your dad is. He left. Things just... didn't work out with us. I'm sure he'll come find you and let you know himself, where he's going. Fennec's ears went back. He'd better. It wasn't like she'd be able to share the news on where she'd found him, but if he broke Killer's heart the same way he'd broken hers, she would truly never forgive him.

She'd wanted so badly to build him a home, but he seemed to have found one here anyways, with Towhee and the rest of the family. She felt a familiar and complicated mix of emotion at the thought. Gratefulness. Jealousy. And a touch, just a touch, of that familiar loneliness. It wasn't his job to choose her over all of the other things he wanted, but right now, every perceived rejection hurt twice as much. Just because Killdeer had no clue what he was doing didn't mean she could choose not to feel it. She could only choose not to show it.

exit germ!

germanicus would leave the small party beside the tablinum, crossing back to the quarters he shared with ruenna.

attention would be surreptitiously kept upon the strangers. but the imperator would not stand over them.

Kallik had no intention of leaving the group alone near the tablinum, not with his wife in there. 

He would follow behind everyone and then find a place to sit and watch, far enough away to give them privacy, but close enough that he could jump in and protect Aquene if needed. 

last from me

His joy was, as it turned out, going to be short lived.

With each revelation, his heart sank. He stepped away from her, a shadow falling over his face. Wh- He didn't know what to say. Scratch that—he did know what to say. He knew a lot of things to say. Just not the order in which to say them.

Why can't you stay? Killdeer started, finally finding his bearings. If you're not gonna be in the Emberwood— His gaze flickered between his mother and Uncle Fig. 

Didn't she want to be with him? Even if she'd left his dad. . .

Wait, what the hell? Why can't you stay? His normally even temper was beginning to boil over.

She heard the anger in his voice and, for the first time, she felt hers flicker towards him in response.  Maybe she should have suspected this would be his reaction, but she hadn't, and it blindsided her maybe even more than Bronco's departure.  Once again, she was the selfish one, but this time she didn't have the space for it.  She just couldn't take anything else right now.

Because I can't.  You chose to come here.  You don't get to be angry at me, okay, when I didn't make that choice for you.  Her fur prickled up, but behind the heat of her words, she knew she was about to lose it.  Her voice cracked and she cut off, snapping her muzzle shut and taking a moment.

This wasn't right.  It wasn't his fault, but still, she couldn't handle this right now.  Maybe coming here was a mistake.

I need to go.  I'm sorry.  Apparently this was her week to burn everything to the ground.  Even the things she'd started off the day taking for granted.  She couldn't hear his disappointment any more, with the echo of his father's accusations still hanging over her head.  He could hate her for that if he needed to.

assuming Fig is being skipped - smack me if not!

Her anger in return startled him. And she wasn't wrong. He'd chosen here over her; he'd chosen pipe dreams of becoming a soldier over his parents.

Killdeer's ire vanished, replaced by a fear that felt like he'd been submerged in icy water up to his neck.

Mom, wait, I'm sorry, he burst out, stumbling forward again.

She was leaving. But hadn't he left her first?

Please don't go. I love you. I want you here with me. His voice, too, cracked on every other word. The other wolves were departing and he felt more comfortable showing emotion, baring his soul to Fennec.

It didn't matter much. In that moment, Killdeer knew he'd irrevocably fucked up.

A better mom would stay and would choose him over herself. She wasn't nearly heartless enough to ignore the way he asked, and her heart broke all over again that she'd been the one to cause this. But she still couldn't. This didn't change that.

She did stop and turn, looking for him. Trying to find a way to hug him fiercely, not only to hide the tears that were threatening.

I can't. It isn't you. If I could stay with you I would, but I need some time. She couldn't run into Bronco again. And she couldn't live here, with all these wolves and all of these rules, feeling like a ticking time bomb.

His legs stiffened at her words, heart growing cold.

He didn't understand. She was his mother. Why couldn't she stay?

Killdeer pulled away, sinking back and following the wolves of Mereo. Okay, he replied, frowning. Come back. . .when you're ready. If she would ever be.

His heart was shattering, but he hid it well. Mereo had given him the discipline to do so.

Killdeer turned, and walked away.

It was too much. It would be so easy, and she could feel the urge settling with uncomfortable temptation. She could hurt Bronco with Killdeer in a way she herself no longer seemed able to touch him because, apparently, their son was all he had wanted to being with. You shouldn't be his. He doesn't have the right. Coward.

She wanted to stay. But if she did, she wouldn't be able to resist the impulse that was winning out, the one that told her to lay all of her mate's shortcomings bare and let their son decide.

She wouldn't. So it was a horrible mother instead.

She listened to him leave and turned to do the same. She couldn't stop the tears and didn't bother trying. They wouldn't change any of this and she was too tired to care anymore. It was time for her to disappear for a while. Every step was a mistake that she had no choice but to make, and she felt every single one viscerally, a knife to her core.

last for me!